Dreams. Dreams. Dreams. What are dreams? Day dreams, aspiring dreams, even dreams when you sleep. What are they? What are they for exactly? Some people say motivation Some people say inspiration Some people say entertainment. You know what I say? It's nothing more than lies. Although, some dreams might be some subconscious wants and wishes or even feelings. Like today for example, I woke up from a dream and it's not a very good one. It's the same one I use to get when I was in elementary school when my mother called me stupid, ugly, useless, and etc. usually before a test or something like that. Or when I do something bad or wrong and she hits me saying she'd rather have me dead and kill me right then and there than to have me act like a child, or an uncivilized 5 year old with no education. It's a dream where my sister, #2, who excels over everything but art and anything that involves performing, gets even better. She grew up to be a rich person with a handsome husband with lots of kids in a grand mansion out on the Beverly Hills. While little ol' me, grew up into a bum who lives in a dingy old apartment old and alone, trying to get by by entertaining kids at a kindergarten when my sister comes in and takes it away from me too. Then it fades to black, back to present time where me, my sister and my mother are staying in my grandparent's place and I got kicked out of the house, turned into a hobo and died in a dumpster. Sad dreams, aren't they? But they are dreams I get whenever I'm around my mother. Abandonment. Abuse. Belittlement. And all that goes in the category. So, are dreams all that great? Some are, at least till they go very very wrong. My old dreams, the good ones that I remember was of me growing up happy with my sister, having neighboring houses with a connecting door and husbands who love me and twin kids with a golden retriever as a pet. The usual kids dream. Nowadays, I'm good if I get regular no dream sleep. My dreams nowadays consist of getting a nice job out of college and finally prove mother wrong. Sounds easy, right? But maybe it's not as easy as it seems. I still want to be better, but I just don't trust dreams anymore. Dreams are for entertainment uses and for when you need creative inspirations. No need to make dreams when someone who takes it down is still around.
