Roman headcanons dedicated to the Asterix universe because they just got my soul
I. I headcanon legionaries secretly cuddling together in their tents when they are scared, especially being in Gaul terretory. They just got so used to each others company, that they are just all like a big family and many of them are just too soft for this endless beating. They're just camping far from home and are very dramatic
II. If they have no blankets, they use their shields. They use their shields for EVERYTHING. It's tactical. You need a table? SHIELD! You need protection from the rain? SHIELD! You have no weapon anymore? SHIELD!
III. They all would like to pet the centurions plume because it looks so fluffy but that's disrespectful and would lead to military punishment. But they all have the desire to just pet-
IV.Most centurions are just big grumpy softies that actually care for their dumb legionaries more than they want to admid. Sometimes screaming at your soldiers means you love them <3
V. The Roman soldiers notice that their mighty equip is totally stupid inside the forest but would never EVER admid that because what Rome does, must be superior! But who tf walks in sandals through a forest with heavy equip. Yeah, only dumb little Roman soldiers <3 Have fun sinking into forest mud ✨
VI. They are terrified of the Gauls to do barbaric things like sacrificing Romans to their gods. There are a lot of scary rumors about the Gauls. They are also scared of the foreign forest noises. Fact is that they are just very uneducated about the "savages" and talk about them as if they are a scary bed time story when in reality our Gauls are very friendly
VII. They drink wine like coffee🍷=☕
VIII. We all know that centurions would like to cuddle their legionaries..right? That's what Mars would do as well-
IX. If we already mention their god of war here- I always wondered what the Roman gods would think about their mortals in the Asterix universe. Like..how does Mars feel about his mortal soldiers failing against a single damn village full of barbarians the whole time?? Does he just..face palms secretly? I think it's funny to imagine the gods all just being goofy bywatchers and Mars just a depressed 'overlord-centurion' that has to watch aaaaall the legions fail against one village. Tho I always liked to imagine that he just loves his mortal army of silly legionaries and can't be mad at such cute mortals for failing over and over again
HELLO i am so sorry i havent done any finished art in ages. school is kicking my ass and probably will continue to kick my ass for a while yet, but i promise i am working on things! and i am very excited to get them finished! im just swamped with homework and kinda suck at time management lol
but in the meantime, i have a 17 page google doc where i put all my asterix headcanons when i think of them, so i thought i would share my ideas about how the magic potion works :D
The potion is said to increase someone’s strength tenfold. That means it only builds on the strength they already have.
This means the potion will work differently for different people, based on their original level of strength.
For most people, they have about the same average strength, so the potion will appear to have the same effect on them. This is also due to the fact that the potion is simply so powerful that everyone who drinks it is insanely strong relative to non-potion drinkers. However, in some cases, the differences are noticeable.
For example, Fulliautomatix would have more brute strength than, say, Cacofonix, when on the potion. Or Asterix would be able to run faster than Geriatrix when on the potion.
The potion builds on strengths the person already has - for Asterix, it makes him extremely fast, as he is already agile and a fast runner without it. For Cacofonix, it allows his voice to create more powerful soundwaves, which can even have physical effects.
(Edit: As pointed out by @elkaos, this actually conflicts with some of the books, where the potion is shown to have the same effect on everyone, and that's relevant to the plot in some cases. I did sort of know this, but it slipped my mind somewhat while I was writing this post. So I guess I'll have to retcon either this idea or the events of books 3 and 12 from my headcanon. These headcanons are based on my own interpretation of Asterix, which is inspired by a lot of fanfics and other creators' ideas as well as the books. Personally I find the idea of the potion's effects varying from person to person more logical, as it's described as multiplying the drinker's strength tenfold. Although maybe the effect being the same has something to do with how it was developed? I've seen a fic where the secret ingredient of the potion is Vercingetorix's ashes - maybe it's something like that where the essence of a person is used in the potion and its effect is equivalent to that person's strength multiplied tenfold.)
The potion also increases a person’s durability - their bones, ligaments, tendons, organs and muscles are stronger and more resistant to damage. This is necessary to make sure that they don’t injure themselves by doing things like punching solid rock.
Even if they do get injured, which can happen when they are faced with sharp blades, the potion also fills their system with adrenaline, which means they usually don’t feel and are not really affected by most injuries until after the potion wears off.
The potion also increases the drinker’s stamina and speed, although this also varies depending on the drinker’s non-potion-enhanced abilities.
Obelix is a special case. But why exactly did drinking a whole cauldron of potion make it have a permanent effect on him? The potion’s effects can’t be stacked by drinking more potion while you’re already under the effects.
I suppose the quantity of potion does matter when determining how long the effects will last - the more potion is flowing through the drinker’s bloodstream, the longer it will take to dilute enough to not have an effect anymore.
Wait. If the potion flows through the drinker’s bloodstream, then how does it have an immediate effect? Digesting it would take at least a few hours.
I guess it might have some magical property that lets it sort of phase into any blood vessels it encounters? So maybe it just radiates out from the stomach, gets to the heart really quickly and starts being pumped around the body almost immediately.
So if Obelix drinks, like, his entire body weight in potion, it’s probably going to last long enough in a large enough quantity to spread and be infused into practically every part of his body, so that then his bone marrow actually starts to make potion-infused blood.
Therefore, every cell that blood flows to, which is basically every cell in his body, is enhanced by the potion, so it becomes an actual part of his biological composition. His blood, muscles, organs, bone marrow, fat, saliva, even his stomach acid is infused with magic potion. The only things that aren’t are his hair and nails.
This is why the permanent effects of the potion are so important to his survival. There would have been a couple of years where they could have gotten it to wear off, but that would probably have involved bloodletting or something, and obviously they’re not going to do that to a six-year-old kid. It doesn’t cause him any adverse effects, anyway, so it’s not something that needs to be reversed. He’ll just have to learn to control his strength.
He wasn’t the strongest before he fell into the potion, but because of how the potion became an actual part of his muscle tissue, he was still able to grow his muscles like a normal person would - just with much heavier weights, like menhirs. Which he has probably been lifting and carrying nearly every day since about his mid-teens. Also because the potion is part of his bone marrow and the blood his body makes is naturally infused with the potion, it creates a sort of positive feedback loop where the effects of the potion, and therefore his strength, keep increasing. This is why he seems to be stronger than the other villagers on the potion, and why his feats of strength increase in magnitude across the series, until Chariot Race when he’s able to catch the huge lump of volcanic rock that explodes out of Mt Vesuvius.
The potion also increased his durability to a very high level. His bones are as hard as granite, and his skin is also quite thick and resistant to cuts. He can still get hurt, but it takes a lot, and almost never happens. This is also why he is so mobile and flexible despite being obese.
Obelix is a bit of an extreme case, but for everyone who drinks the potion regularly (mostly just Asterix and maybe some of the other warriors, hunters or guards), it speeds up their metabolism considerably in order to provide them with the large quantities of energy they need to function while on the potion. This is how Asterix is able to eat most of a boar nearly twice his size. (Although that was pushing it and he usually doesn’t need that much energy.)
The potion does not actively heal wounds except in the very short term, when it can exacerbate the effect of adrenaline to such an extent that it will completely heal minor to moderately serious wounds if taken within about a minute after sustaining the injury. However, it does give the body more energy, enabling it to heal faster. It also helps the immune system fight infection and the body to remake lost blood.
It won’t cure concussions, but it does get rid of them faster and reduces long-term damage. (This is how Asterix can have had no less than six concussions in the space of a few years and not feel any lasting effects.)
Chronic illnesses and fatigue can be treated, but not cured by the potion. It unfortunately doesn't help with nerve pain, because there's no wound for it to help heal or inflammation/ bacteria/ etc. for it to fight.
Over time, this will cause regular potion drinkers to have stronger immune systems and heal more quickly. (Cacofonix still gets sick easily, but without the potion he’d probably have been dealing with asthma or an autoimmune disease. Obelix still gets hay fever in spring, but I guess maybe the potion doesn’t help with allergies. He does sometimes get mild colds and stuff, but the potion protects him from a lot of more serious diseases.)
The potion also increases a drinker’s core body temperature slightly and makes it easier to maintain, which is how all the Gauls can walk around in the snow either in sleeveless tops or just straight up shirtless, with only maybe a scarf or gloves to keep them warm. This effect also lingers over time if you drink the potion regularly. (Or if you’re Obelix. He’s like a walking heater.)
In Asterix the Gaul, we see the Gauls take potion regularly and use their strength for everyday tasks. This is because they used to take potion in shifts, so that some people would always be ready to go fight the Romans if they attacked. Doing chores while on the potion was just an added convenience. (As I speculated earlier, the potion lasts longer if you drink more of it, so maybe they used to drink more potion with each dose to make it last longer - maybe half or even a full day.)
This seemed like a great strategy until one day, a new centurion decided to attack the village at an unexpected time. The people who were on the potion went out to fight, but Asterix's potion wore off mid-battle. Not realising in time, he got into a fight with the centurion and ended up getting pretty badly hurt. (Inspired by this post - I came up with this idea while I was thinking about what might have happened in that scenario)
After that, they decided to just take the potion when needed to prevent something like it happening again. This also enabled Getafix to spend more time experimenting with new potions because he wasn’t making the strength potion every day.
so yeah! that's all i got. thanks so much if you read this whole thing. hopefully i'll have time to finish something else soon :D
Hear me out. This is a comfort headcanon of mine inspired by @obelixetcompagnie 's idea that the Gauls have a potion that allows them to transition.
I hc that Getafix himself is trans, he created the transitioning potion for himself and was the first person to test in on. It worked and since then he's been more than happy to provide it for everybody in need. Word got around Gaul about his exceptional, magical invention and the village became a place where you can travel to for help and refuge. Getafix will gladly take you in and take care of you, and so will the others, who will accept you as one of their own.
Getafix is a highly respected druid both among his peers and everyone who has even an ounce of reason in their brains, so few dare question him and his methods. The Gods wouldn't have blessed Getafix with the knowledge on how to make a trans potion if transitioning was against their will, after all, and their will must be honored. To defy Getafix and his trans potion is to defy the Gods. Cursed be the fool who dares to go against them, by Toutatis!
So we all know that the Indomitable Gauls can whup Roman soldiers with just a sip of magic potion.
However, Caesar's lieutenants ( over the years ) are harder to defeat even with the magic potion combat wise. Like, throw a magic potion charged Geriatrix to any of Caesar's lieutenants over the years ( Lepidus, Mark Anthony, Silanus etc ) and they can STILL put up an impressive fight with magic potion charged Geriatrix
And Caesar is actually the hardest to defeat combat wise out of Caesar and his lieutenants over the years EVEN AFTER THE INDOMITABLE GAULS DRINK MAGIC POTIONS
I mean, Caesar is strong enough to pick up fat Senators by the collar, throw heavy generals across rooms, AND also carry grown men with ONLY ONE ARM
And Cleopatra just watches Caesar being strong while eating grapes and blushing.
