you wanna know? જ⁀➴ you were telling matt about your childhood memories. the good and the bad, the bad being the lack of these comfy pillows you always wanted.
warnings જ⁀➴ an attempt at fluff, matt being the sweetest man alive, idk😭
lowercase intended — not proofread (im a lil sleepy)
۶ৎ “i remember the time i cussed out my friend,” you say out of the blue, breaking the comfortable silence in matt’s room. you and matt were in his room, cuddling up against each other, under a cozy blanket, the flickering light from the tv creating a warm atmosphere. matt turned his head towards you, brows knitted in confusion not knowing where this confession came from. “actually, i had to cut off both of my best friends.” you say, idly playing with the neckline of his red sweater, looking into his very confused eyes. “why? when was this?” he questions, studying your calm demeanor and rubbing your back just in case it was a sensitive topic.
“well, when i was about to move to another school. she was mad because i told her to give my nintendo ds back, we argued and she said she didn't want to be friends anymore,” you said, finding it funny how she got mad at you for wanting your stuff back. “mhm,” matt hummed, letting you know that he’s listening, “then the other best friend i had to cut off was in elementary school, she was only friends with me for my brother! can you imagine?” you exclaim as you readjusted yourself, looking for one of matt’s stuffed animals to lay your head on.
“matt have you ever heard of pillow pets? i used to have a couple when i was younger, i definitely want more, maybe build a collection of them, they’re so cute!” you exclaimed, eyes filled with excitement just at the mere thought of those beloved pillows—companions that had helped you through countless sleepless nights and tough times over the years. The memories flooded back, reminding you of the comfort that they provided during life's storms. “my first one was the pony one and then it was the ladybug, they were my babies.” you say as sleepiness washes over you. “yeah, nick has one back in boston. i believe it was a panda.” matt states softly, snuggling closer to you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he felt you softly nod your head before dozing off. “maybe i can be your pillow pet for the time being, or we can build a little family of pillow pets together?” he says to particularly no one because you were fast asleep. he smiles softly, brushing his lips against your forehead. “you’re my pillow pet.” he whispers before surrendering to sleep himself, cherishing the warmth of the moment.
synopsis: In midst of a battle reader chases after Jeongyeon. Set on catching up to her at the frontlines. Frustration and a strange feeling brewing inside her chest.
w/c: 1.6k
warnings: violence; mentions of blood; slight angst; fluff (?)
a/n: came across jeongyeon what is love pic and felt inspired. knight!jeongyeon x knight!reader plagued my mind. this was written quickly and is a bit fast-paced. first work with a happy ending whattt??? this was definitely challenging all i know is angst :) might write more of this genre 👀
The sounds of blades clashing echoed throughout the field. Your heart hammered against your metal armor as you dodged arrows and blades. Slightly stumbling as your stamina waned.
High pitched screams and wails filled your ears. The smell of metal and blood infused invaded your nostrils. Your sight, however, was locked onto a knight ahead of you. On golden, shoulder-length hair that peeked out from under their helmet.
It was your partner — Jeongyeon. She was several meters ahead of you, attacking the opposing army with brutal force. No mercy in her assault.
This was the first time in months since you’d seen your longtime friend. You had been away fulfilling other knightly duties when a message was given to you. The Chou’s were under attack. You rushed back to the kingdom, making it back in just three days.
The knight wasn’t told of your return. She’d been at the frontlines since the start of the battle.
Jeongyeon was the one to send out the message to you.
The two of you grew up together as kids. You joined the knights guard and trained side by side. Partners in every quest. Protecting the kingdom and its queen, Chou Tzuyu. Every battle you’ve fought had been fought together. You were inseparable, until now.
Sweat trickled down your eyebrow. Your grip tightened on your sword as Jeongyeon kept getting further and further.
You wouldn’t be able to catch up to her while she was on that damned horse.
--
Too caught up on Jeongyeon, you failed to notice the incoming spear headed straight towards your back.
Suddenly, a strong body collided with you. The new presence too abrupt for you to react in time. Bringing you both to the ground, weapons falling in front of you. Rendering you vulnerable. Out of instinct, you bounced back up and picked up your sword. Adrenaline kicking in. Ready for any strike or ambush from the one who took you down.
“Help me up you fool,” grunted a familiar voice.
“Momo?!” you observed the tall, broad knight before you. When you confirmed it was indeed Momo, you lowered your blade.
The other knight was in the middle of a brawl with another swordsman when she caught you in the corner of her eyes. Distracted by something, or rather someone. When she saw the danger you were in she acted immediately. Finding an opening to stab her opponent through the neck and sprinted your way.
“A thanks would be nice. I just saved your ass,” Momo huffed out as you guided her up, “There was a spear coming right towards you.”
Just a few inches to the side lay the mentioned spear. You looked back towards her and then at the dirt-filled ground. In disbelief of the near miss; ashamed at your lack of awareness. A certain knight overtaking your mind.
“Thank you,” you muttered.
“You don’t say,” sarcasm dripped in her voice as she rushed into the offense.
Picking up your shield and shaking off the dirt, you too rejoined the battle. You focused your attention on the combat this time. Keeping the thoughts of Jeongyeon at the back of your head. You had to stay alive if you wanted to catch up to her.
Focused on fending off enemies left and right. A squealing neigh pulled your attention.
Time slowed.
You watched as Jeongyeon was knocked off her horse. There was an ambush of arrows that soared in her direction. Her horse took the brunt of the attack, rearing upwards before collapsing — lifeless. You heard her scream in anguish as she fell.
Panic flooded through every nerve in your body. Recklessly you charged further into the onslaught. Your eyes darting everywhere for any sight of the golden-haired knight.
You swore you could hear her faint cries, but there was no sight of Jeongyeon anywhere.
Overcome with dread, you did the only thing you could. Fight.
--
After the battle ended, you searched everywhere for the knight.
You called out to her. Shouted her name. Running across the countless corpses that laid across the field. Fearing you’d find your partner among them.
As you continued running through the bloodstained grass, nearly tripping over your own feet, you realized something. You didn’t just feel fear at the thought of losing Jeongyeon. There was another feeling that resided deep inside your chest, hidden in the deep caverns of your heart.
Love.
It took the thought of losing Jeongyeon forever, being separated permanently, to uncover this feeling.
It was love that caused your heart to ache. That had distracted you in the midst of battle. Leading you to almost getting killed by a spear and called a fool. Love that had you charging recklessly into battle; wanting to protect and save she who claimed it.
You headed to the edge of the field, where the tree line began. Walked to the closest tree to place an arm out to lean against it.
Tears began to brim at the corners of your eyes. Body giving out to your emotions, you fell to your knees in defeat. Your love was nowhere to be found.
A hand crept out from the bushes behind the tree, attempting to grab your arm. Reflexes kicked in. You pulled out your dagger from its confinement on the side of your leg. Prepared to strike who you thought was a surviving enemy.
Instantly you recognized her voice. Discarding the dagger and the equipment in your hands. Grasping ahold of her hands you dragged her out of the bushes.
--
It turns out when Jeongyeon had gotten thrown off her horse, the arrows had barely grazed past her. The armor doing its job of protecting her.
Still, she wasn’t completely unharmed. During her fall she landed on her foot wrong, knee dislocating. She couldn’t stand up, the pain in her leg was too much. The already heavy armor feeling ten times heavier. Keeping her weighted to the ground.
Reacting quickly, Jeongyeon scanned her surroundings. There were several trees behind her with bushes spread around. She mustered all the remaining strength she had and managed to crawl to the tree line. Finding refuge in the bushes.
Knowing that once everything has ended, the first thing you’d do is find her.
--
Carefully, you took off her helmet. Your eyes meeting chestnut brown. You felt all the tension leave your body. Relieved. Allowing yourself to finally rest, kneeling beside Jeongyeon.
You cradled your love’s face with the palms of your hands. Rested your forehead on hers. Ignoring the dried sweat and blood from days of battling. A soft laugh escaped your lips,
“You fool, you could’ve gotten yourself killed.”
The knight grunted at your words, “I had to fight.” She closed her eyes momentarily before meeting your gaze again. Sigh escaping her lips. Glint visible in her eyes, “Couldn’t risk you getting hurt.”
Face to face, you stared at your partner in shock. Couldn’t risk you getting hurt? You’ve fought together for years. Injury and death were always a possibility in this line of work. What made this battle any different?
“Why, Jeong?” you whispered.
Hands laced into your own. Soft lips pressed to the knuckles of your now bare hands, ridden of your gauntlets. Your heart skipped a beat at the small gesture.
Not too long ago, Jeongyeon too had a realization. It happened when you were away.
There was talk of a knight encountering a group of bandits during a mission. She couldn’t help but think it was you, in danger. Not being allowed to leave the kingdom, the knight’s heart clenched in fear. It was then that it dawned on her, she was in love with you.
Choosing actions over words. Jeongyeon gently released your hands. Moving them up to wrap around your shoulders. She hesitated, searching your eyes for any sign to pull away. Seeing no discomfort, only tranquility reflected in your gaze, she continued.
Slowly she guided you down closer. Noses grazing each other and breaths mixing into one. She crashed your lips together. Armor clanking at the connection above.
Your arms rested on the sides of her head, sighing into the kiss. The strength in your arms slightly wavered as your lips meshed together.
Heartbeats quickened, overflowed with love. A love that was reciprocated.
Breathless and in need of air, you pulled back slightly. The girl underneath you looked up at you. Her features softened as she admired you.
“I love you,” she confessed.
A smile formed on your face. Heart swelling in joy and a warmth spread throughout your chest.
You reached up. Fingers tucking a strand of her matted bangs to the side, “I love you too.”
Wanting to feel more of the girl, you leaned down again initiating another kiss. More deep and passionate.
A throat being cleared interrupted your intimate little moment. It was Momo. The corner of her mouth tilted upwards, grin plastered on her face, “C’mon you fools. Let’s get you to the infirmary.”
She helped you lift the injured knight onto her feet. Your arm finding her waist to balance her. Both you and Momo guided her to the knight’s manor.
Jeongyeon casted a glance at you, beaming. Grateful for many reasons; you finding her, both of you being alive, and you reciprocating her love. For that she pecked your lips with a feather-like kiss.
As you felt soft lips pressed against your own, you made a promise to yourself. Never again will you separate from Jeongyeon. Follow her wherever she goes and remain by her side. Till your very last breaths. You’ll cherish and bask in this love like there’s no tomorrow.
The knight beside you two watched from her peripherals. A small smile tugged on her lips at the scene. Fools, she thought to herself.
I thought of trying to make fluff with one of my favorite ships x reader. I’m not too used to fluff, but I'm going to try my best.
-------------------------------
For the first time in a long while, none of the three of us had to work. That’s just a surprising miracle in itself.
When was the last time the three of us could spend time together? It doesn’t matter. All that matters is it’s happening now.
We’re all snuggled on the bed. Shouta behind me, obviously already asleep, and Hizashi laying his head on my chest while I run my hands through his abnormally soft and silky hair. That soft smile looking up at me while I do it making me have one myself. The sheer feeling of content and happiness coursing through me.
The only sounds available were the quiet snores of Shouta and the pitter-patter of rain falling outside. Oh, and the soft purring of our cat on the bed. Nothing could make this better if it tried. The fading glow of the small lamp next to the bed is the only source of light through the room.
“Yo, I think of this every night we can’t do it, and it makes me sad. Sho and I always miss ya. Even if the grump can’t admit it.” He said in his quietest voice he could muster. It’s still such a surprise whenever I get to hear how soft his voice can actually go.
Another wave of happiness goes through me knowing only Shouta and I have heard the quieter side of him.
My smile widened at him. “And you two have no idea how much I think about it. It’s almost a hazard for me at my job.” I whispered. He let out a small chuckle.
“No kidding. Sho has to always keep me on task when we’re on a mission. Last time, a villain almost snuck up on me!” His voice went a little louder, but it didn’t seem to be enough to wake Shouta.
I ran my hand through his hair again, still not catching on a single knot. How in the world!? “Well, you better be more careful. If you do get hurt, I might just have to stop this for a while as a punishment.” He let out a mock gasp and slightly lifted his head to look at me fully. His beautiful green eyes being fully shown from the rare time of not wearing either pair of his glasses. In a way they’re deathly hypnotizing.“You wouldn’t.”
I smirked. “I would.” I thought of teasing him by stopping my hand now, but the moment was too precious and peaceful to ruin. It seems Hizashi caught on to my thoughts since his smile turns into one with relief. He laid back down on my chest. His smile suddenly became a frown. “But what if I get injured and you think I just wasn’t paying attention?” His saddened tone left a small twinge in my heart.
A hand came up and harshly flicked his head. “Ow!” Looking up, Shouta was lightly glaring at him. Oh, Hizashi’s voice earlier must have woken him... “Don’t be such a fool. I’ll be there and be able to tell if you were focused or not... They won’t be the only one punishing you if you’re the problem of being injured. You’re stuck with us and we’re stuck with you,” a smirk appeared on his face. “Unfortunately.”
Despite being serious at the beginning, he ended up sounding uncharacteristically teasing and kind towards the end. Hizashi and I both knew in a way it was a warning in disguise. “Sho! Not you too! I definitely don’t plan on getting hurt on purpose to find out. Oh!-” His voice went back to being slightly louder now that he knew Shouta was awake. “And good morning!”
It was pretty easy to pick up on Shouta’s already growing “annoyance”. “Go back to the quiet way you were earlier. It’s night, not morning.” He replied with a gravelly voice of just waking up, and pet our cat next to him.
I brought my other hand behind me to play with his bangs. He playfully glared at me, which ended up making Hizashi chuckle. I spread the bangs apart so they nearly covered his eyes, and with how silly it made him look, a gentle laugh escaped me too. He grabbed my hand and brought it down to rest beside us on the bed, and started to rub his thumb over the back of it. He stopped petting the cat and fixed his bangs to the way they were.
His other hand laid on the bed as he seems to be reaching for something. It clicked in my mind what he wanted. I stopped combing my hand through Hizashi’s hair, and reached down to grab his hand, then brought it to connect with Shouta’s.
Their hands interlocked, and Hizashi grew a teasing smirk on his face. “You could have just asked, Sho.” He didn’t answer but tightened his grip on Hizashi’s hand.
My arm started to get tired by combing through his hair, so I rested it on the center of his back.
We stayed like that for a while until Shouta needed to use the bathroom. I sat up just enough for him to get out from behind me. It left a cold area on my back that felt uncomfortable and wanted to warm up again.
I moved up a bit to where Shouta was laying which was still warm. Hizashi refused to let go, so he ended up going higher on the bed with me. My other arm went onto his back and hugged him to come closer. He easily had no objections and just turned his head so the side of it was on my chest.
He closed his eyes and grew a content smile. The peace didn't last long though as Shouta came back and flopped right onto Hizashi. He and I let out a simultaneous noise of air being knocked out of us. Shouta quickly wrapped one of his arms under Hizashi to hold him closer, and his other arm brought up the blanket to cover his back. He then wrapped it to join the way his other arm is. It was close enough they pressed into my stomach, but in an oddly comfortable way.
It didn’t take long for him to start snoring again. It was enough to make me teasingly roll my eyes. Hizashi looked like he was having a hard time not laughing.
“He’s going to wake up with really numb arms.”
“Definitely.”
A comfortable silence came over us again. The only difference being the cat left the room, and the rain coming down harder.
I looked down to see Hizashi was starting to drift off himself. My heart swelled again at the peaceful sight in front of me.
Drowsiness started to weigh on me as well. I reached over and turned off the light. I kissed the forehead of Hizashi, and since it was impossible to do the same to Shouta, I kissed my hand and gently placed it on his forehead. It’s the thought that counts.
How about just like,,, the FLUFFIEST g/t you can do, like I don't even care about the pairing or whatever but like,,, fluff is GOOD and your writing is GOOD soooo them combined would be *chefs kiss*
We're Simply Meant To Be
(Lol, I'm not good at writing pure fluff, I'm sorry if it's bad)
Virgil stared up at the giant house anxiously, as Patton pulled up outside of it. Last week his friend, Roman, had invited him over to spend the night, and he would've been happy to go except that Roman was a giant, not only that but... Virgil had a crush on said giant. Apart from the fact that Virgil was terrified of being around a giant all night and embarrassing himself in front of his crush, he was also the only one Roman had invited to come over, with the only other people going to be there being his family...of giants.
"Alrighty Kiddo, we're here!" His older brother chirped happily.
"Patton, you're also friends with Ro. You sure you don't wanna come?" Virgil prayed he'd say yes so he'd at least have some support there with him.
"Sorry Virgil, but you're the one he invited." Patton gave his lil bro a sympathetic look, knowing what Virgil really meant. "Remember, if you don't want to go you don't have to."
"No! I-I mean," Virgil corrected. "I want to go, it's just..."
"It's okay Virgil." Patton gently placed a supportive hand on his brother's shoulder. "Just remember, if you ever want to leave just call me. I'll be here on an instant." Virgil nodded slowly in response, then wrapped Patton in a tight hug.
"Thanks Pat, you're the best." He mumbled through Patton's shirt.
"I know." He smiled. "Now get going! You can't keep your prince charming waiting!"
"Patton!" He whined but it was all in good fun, making Patton chuckle. Virgil huffed. "I'll see you tomorrow." He finally got out of the car.
"See you then kiddo!" With that the car door was closed and Patton drove off.
No backing out now. Virgil swallowed his emotions and approached the ginormous door before him. Near the bottom, far enough down for a human to reach, there was a human sized doorbell. He took a deep breath, pushed the doorbell, then let it out. There was a loud ringing from inside the house followed by the sound of movement and booming footsteps that shook the ground as they got closer. He stared up at the door nervously waiting to see who would answer.
Suddenly the door opened, without warning causing Virgil to jump back in fear. When he looked at who it was, he only felt his fear intensify slightly, as the person who opened the door was Roman's brother. Remus. The infamous school jock who didn't think twice about the consequence of his actions. Virgil's body shook as he breathed, trying to stay calm.
"Hellooooo?" Remus called out as he looked around, making Virgil realize that he couldn't see him. Did Roman not tell them that he was coming?
"I-I'm down here!" Virgil called out through cupped hands. He took a step back as his eyes widened when Remus' eyes spotted his minuscule form.
"Oh, it's you." The giant shrugged as he turned back inside. "HEY RO! YOU'RE HUMAN'S HERE COME PICK THEM UP!!!" He shouted so loud that Virgil had to cover his ears. There was a muffled shout from inside and some shuffling. Remus gave a salute to Virgil, then left.
Virgil waited patiently as the pounding of footsteps got louder, making the ground under him shake. Soon there was Roman huffing for breath at the door.
"Hey"-huff-"Virgil." Roman greeted out of breath. "Sorry about that, I didn't know when you'd get here and I didn't want Remus to do anything." He scratched the back of his neck nervously as he apologized.
"It's fine Princey," Virgil shrugged. "so this is your place?" As Virgil spoke Roman lowered a hand for him to climb onto.
"Yeah, the ole Princeton residance!" Roman said as he watched his tiny friend accept the offer and climb on.
"Huh, house of the mayor's family..." Virgil spoke while being lifted by his friend's hand. "Thought it'd be bigger." He shrugged nonchalantly.
"Hey!" Roman made a few noises of offense that Virgil knew as offended princey noises. "It's big enough Tom Thumb!" He huffed.
"Whatever you say Jolly Green Giant." Virgil smirked as Roman gawked in mock offense.
"Exscuse you! If anything I'm Scott Lang when he grows!" Roman spoke proudly as he carried Virgil inside.
"Whatever you tell yourself Jack The Beanstalk." Virgil barely held in his laughter at Roman's response.
"Well I never-" Roman shook his head as he did a southern bell impression finally getting a small chuckle from Virgil. Roman smiled at that, proud that he was able to keep his small friend calm. Truth is, little did Virgil know that Roman had a crush on him and had known that Virgil was going to be nervous, witch is why he was going to do anything to keep Virgil happy until midnight. For at midnight, he planned to finally do something...
"So what's the plan tonight, Prince Armpit-Stink?" Virgil snapped Roman out of his thoughts, just as they arrived at his room.
"Well, for starters, you stop calling me that." Roman smiled as Virgil laughed. "Then we'll do the usual sleepover stuff." He shrugged.
"What's "the usual sleepover stuff"?" Virgil used airquotes.
"Well... I don't really know." Roman chuckled to himself as the little emo shook his head. Roman sat Virgil down on his bed and closed his bedroom door as he thought. While Roman was doing that, Virgil noti6his TV and Disney collection.
"We could watch a movie?" Virgil shrugged.
"Excellent idea!" Roman exclaimed. "Any preferences?"
"Tim Burton's always good." Virgil sat down on Roman's pillow and got comfortable.
"Of course you would say that." Roman tutted lovingly. He pulled out his copy of The Nightmare Before Christmas Collectors Edition. He popped the disk into his DVD player and set up the TV. Once Roman finished he carefully got onto the bed with Virgil.
Then the movie began.
●●●
At some point during the movie Roman had laid down, his head on the pillow behind Virgil, and Virgil had snuggled up against Roman's nose. It was getting late and by the song Kidnap Mr. Sandycaws Roman's mom had come by to drop off some pizza for them, witch was now discarded on the floor. Neither of them really spoke throughout the movie, just enjoying each others company.
That is until Roman heard a small voice singing beautifully, yet quietly, along to Sally's Song. "I sense there's something in the wind. That feels like tragedy's at hand. And though I'd like to stand by him. Can't shake this feeling that I have." Their voice was beautiful as they harmonized with Sally.
"The worst is just around the bend. And does he notice. My feelings for him? And will he see How much he means to me? I think it's not to be." As Roman listened, he knew it was Virgil singing, and was amazed by it. Causing him to fall even deeper for the emo.
"What will become of my dear friend? Where will his actions lead us then? Although I'd like to join the crowd. In their enthusiastic cloud." Virgil avoided looking at Roman. What would he think? Why was he even friends with Virgil? He was popular and Virgil was... not. Why did Roman like him?
"Try as I may, it doesn't last. And will we ever. End up together? No, I think not. It's never to become. For I am not the one" Virgil let his head hand on the last note, sadly. He tried to subtly glance at Roman. Why did he stick around? This is all going to end someday and he's just going to get hurt when the day comes that Roman realizes that he doesn't need him anymore. He turned back to the TV and stared at it as he willed himself not to cry.
"My dearest freind, if you don't mind. I'd like to join you by your side." A louder, more confident voice sang the reprise out lovingly from behind Virgil.
"Where we could gaze into the stars. And sit together now and forever. For it is plain as anyone could see." Virgil turned around to see Roman staring at him with a deep longing, as he sang. Although Virgil had tried to be subtle when he had looked at Roman and when he had tried to hold his tears back, Roman had still noticed. It had hurt to notice that Virgil wasn't just sining to sing, but from a deeper feeling.
They smiled lovingly at each other as they both thought the same thing and sang the last line together in perfect harmony.
"We're simply meant to be."
They both leand forward, Roman less than Roman but still enough. Virgil pressed his lips against Roman's large ones as they both closed their eyes. When they both pulled away Virgil's eyes widened.
"Oh my God! Roman I'm so sorry!" Virgil rushed out embarrassed.
"No, no, hey, it's fine." Roman comforted his little emo. "I love you Virgil." Roman smiled warmly.
Virgil hesitated for a moment, and then leaned in and kissed Roman again.
(Part 2 of “Take Another Piece Of My Heart”)
A/N: I’m honestly so surprised and grateful for the of love and support I got from part 1 (which I recommend you read before this). And the amount of people that wanted a part 2?? Wowow thank you so much!
So here she is and I’d like to apologise because:
TRIGGER WARNING - SUICIDE ATTEMPT/SUICIDAL IDEATIONS
I’d like to make it clear that my intentions are in no means to glorify or romanticise suicide. I’m not saying this is how every depressed person acts bc this is written based on my own experiences and thoughts. I do not intend to offend anyone with this. If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts or similar please, seek help. You can always talk to me :3 I find talking to be a good way of relieving emotions.
I hope you like it :P and I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable.
A year had whizzed by faster than you could’ve ever imagined. After you left your long term friends, you were surprised at how much free time you had now that you weren’t touring with them or joining them in the studio, watching them fall apart at disagreements. You had moved into your parents’ flat, though they were no longer with you. You had no other place to go and this was the safest place that didn’t draw connections to Queen. Every time you thought about the day you left, you’d suddenly get the urge to hit your head until it’s out of your mind. No matter what, nothing filled the empty space in your heart the boys left and John took up the most space.
You spent the whole day writing the final parts of the note you’d been storing for a few months. You were never serious about it, but lately you were the lowest you ever felt. You couldn’t bear living the lie that you were perfectly fine, that you weren’t lonely all the time from isolating yourself in your flat and only went out to buy groceries every other week or so. Even then, you couldn’t gather the energy to make meals.
The note was your final goodbye to everyone, but more importantly an apology to John for wasting his time with your presence.
You closed the front door of the building and got into your car, driving to what was yours and John's favourite place. It was an isolated field on a massive cliff with a bench and a dim streetlight placed on the side. It was perfect. You parked the car and sat on the bench for a while, going through your note and assuring yourself that this was the only way. You didn’t need to live in shame and embarrassment anymore. It was now or never.
Sighing deeply, you walked closer to the edge, stuffing the note in your pocket. You closed your eyes, ready to lean into the pit, when a familiar voice called out from behind you.
You jumped back and turned around to see who it was. Your face went from shock, to confusion and then to anger.
“John? What’re you doing here?” He looked intimidated by your harsh tone. You couldn’t find it in you to feel the slightest bit sympathetic.
“I’ve come here every evening ever since we...” he couldn’t even finish the sentence, you could tell it hurt him to think about. The two of you stood there in silence, awkwardness clearly present. It took him a few seconds to realise what you were about to do.
”Christ, Y/N, get away from the edge.” he said, taking a step closer to you as you took one back. Your heels were hanging dangerously off the cliff.
“If you come any closer I’ll- I’ll do it.” you threatened. He had no idea what he had to do.
“Is this because of me?” he said quietly.
“Y-yeah...no it’s my fault. I just feel bad for wasting so much of your time. I’ve written my guilt - and everything else - down.” you stumbled on your words. Everything you said sounded stupid out loud and your cheeks flared with fire.
“Can I see it?”
You fumbled in your pocket to find your note and reached your arm out for him to take it.
“It’s written for you anyway.” your voice wobbled.
He ran towards you, grabbing your arm and pulling you away from the cliff, not giving you time to react. He then slipped the grip on your arm and wrapped it around your waist, pulling you into a deep hug. It took you by surprise - not having any sort of affection for over a year made you so fragile that his touch triggered a waterfall of tears. You sobbed into his shoulder and whispered apologies as he shushed you and you felt complete. Being in his arms - it felt like home.
“I love you, Y/N.” he whispered, breaking you out of your trance. Memories of the break up came flowing back. You pushed him away aggressively, tears turning angrier.
“Force of habit, I’m so sorry-” he blushed, eyes falling to look at his feet. He was visibly embarrassed but you didn’t care. At least he understood how moronic you’ve felt.
“Unbelievable. You broke me - I don’t know who I am anymore! That’s what you did to me!” You tried grabbing the note back, but he pulled his hand away, looking down to read it.
“Forget it. I can’t deal with this right now.”
You stomped off into your car, slammed the door and sped your way home, leaving him to read your pathetic note full of self-hatred.
You were exhausted, sobbing hysterically as you walked into the flat and threw your coat on the hanger. Suddenly, your knees buckled under you and you held onto the walls for support as you made your way into the living room.
“Could you stop pestering me?”
You couldn’t stop the flashbacks.
“I need you to go.”
The clothes you were wearing quickly drenched in sweat as your hot skin stuck to it. You could feel your breathing getting slower and see everything merging into one big blur of darkness before your head hit the ground.
However, you were unaware that John remembered his way to your parents’ flat and it didn’t take him long to find out it’s where you’ve been hiding from him and the world. Why didn’t he go there before? He used the spare key in the plant pot to get into the lobby, something he was used to in your earlier years, and walked up to your flat.
He knocked on the door a few times, but you didn’t respond. He got nervous, knocking more and calling your name through the postbox. You were still unconscious as he opened your door, walking through the flat and trying to find you.
Then, he finally saw you in the middle of your living room floor, unresponsive. He panicked for a few seconds before checking for a pulse, breathing a huge sigh of relief when he found one. He carefully placed a hand on your back, the other under your knees, carrying you into your room. With the same tenderness, he placed you in your bed and tucked the duvet around you.
You woke up to the faint sound of sizzling, worried that you’d be the reason for the building burning down. You got up to investigate the origins of the sound, light-headed and dazed as to how you ended up in your bed. You didn’t remember much of yesterday’s events, until you saw John next to your stove.
“Oh good, you’re awake. Slept well?”
“Was fine.” you looked at him confused. Maybe you were concussed and he was just a hallucination.
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost!” he grinned, walking over to check your temperature. Your heart fluttered when his warm hand pressed against your forehead.
You shook your head rid of his hand and your feelings.
“Lucky for you, breakfast will be ready in a minute.” He flashed a smile and turned back to the stove. As you made your way to the table, you couldn’t help wondering if there was something you forgot from last night. You thought you’d made your anger toward him clear, so why was he in your house?
“Careful, you’ll shoot lasers into the table if you carry on staring like that.” John showed up in front of you, holding two plates of full English breakfasts. He noticed you rolling your eyes.
“What, you don’t like the food?”
You scoffed, “No, you know it’s my favourite. It’s just- why are you here, John?”
“You really think I would just forget the state I saw you in yesterday?”
“Uh, judging by the terms we left off on, yes.”
You started on the breakfast, eating like there was no tomorrow.
“You really haven’t been taking proper care of yourself, have you?”
“Define “proper care”.” you spoke through the food. You quickly glanced up to see John looking at you, his forehead wrinkled in concern.
“Look, I’m fine right now, aren’t I? Why are you so worried? Can’t you just leave me alone?”
He chuckled quietly, which only sparked more anger in you.
“What?” you retorted.
“That’s the last thing I told you.”
Your face softened, pinching the bridge of your nose and forcing the flashbacks to go away.
“Really, what’s wrong? What drove you to the cliff?”
“My car.” you scoffed, making him put down his knife and fork to look at you with more seriousness.
“Y/N.” he said sharply.
“It is in the note that you stole from me yesterday.”
“I didn’t read it. It made me sick to think about,” his voice cracked and he blinked furiously to stop himself from crying, “my mind was just set on making sure you were still alive.”
This whole time he’d been caring for your you the same way you cared for him. And you’d been denying his care the same way he denied yours. So you told him everything. You told him how the loneliness from not having any family left and losing the only friends you ever had got unbearable.
“But I never said I wanted you out of my life.”
“Then why didn’t you check on me sooner?”
“I told you, I needed time for myself. Everything just got to me after Freddie died, not to mention I was treating you like sh-”
“Woah, language. Didn’t expect that from you.” you gave a small laugh to ease the tone and he joined. You finally felt comfortable talking to him again.
“Y’know, time away from you gave me a lot to think about.”
“Like what?”
“I think you’re the one,” you dropped your knife and fork and looked at him in shock, “I mean, I’ve always known. Even the band did,” he grinned.
You remember everyone being relieved after you finally got together, calling you the couple that’d never split. Even you believed it, up until that day.
“Freddie and Brian wouldn’t stop talking about fate. Roger, my word Roger, he always made fun of me. He’d ask when his turn was!” he chuckled, his face shortly turning serious. He leant over the table and rested his hands on yours.
“And I’ll help you get through this. I promise, you can get through this, I’ll do my best to make sure you’re with me for as long as possible. I’ll get you a therapist. Until then-”
He got out of the chair and headed to your radio, looking through your CDs that haven’t been touched in more than a year while you sat there and felt like a child on Christmas. You didn’t realise how much you missed him rambling about things he was so passionate about. About how much he cared for you.
He skipped through many songs on “The Game”, eventually landing on “Need Your Loving Tonight”, a song he wrote.
You felt nostalgia rushing while he hopped around the living room floor, showing off his old Disco Deacy moves. He sang his way over to you, stretching out a hand. You took it and joined him on the floor.
“I said I’d never be angry with you.” you sang along, grinning as he gave you that Deacy smile that would never get old.
The two of you jumped around like mad and you couldn’t stop laughing. He would occasionally spin you or do some other cheesy, romantic moves while the song continued.
“Coz I love her, love her, love her, love her!”
His voice was croaky from the lack of singing over the years and he messed up the lines frequently, but he didn’t care. As long as what he needed to tell you reached you, he was happy. And it did. That euphoric feeling of home filled you to the brim, melting the remaining anger and hurt.
The song had ended but he kept repeating some lyrics. You started crying over how happy you felt, after you’ve beaten yourself up for so long.
“Come on, Y/N, let’s get together.”
You nodded enthusiastically, locking your arms around his neck, his hands held your hips as he pulled you into a long-awaited, warm kiss.
“I’ll love you, Deacy, I’ll love you forever.”
-
Thank you for reading, I hope you liked it!
As always, criticism is welcomed.
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