#autism spec

[briarmae]

I have autism and I'm touch repulsed.

My sense of touch is super sensitive. (Even though I have a pretty high pain tolerance, idk.) I base all my clothing choices first and foremost on how it feels against my skin.

Human touch is... awful. Skin to skin is even worse. If it's one of "my people," I can tolerate it. They now know that I prefer not to hug, and they wait for me to offer, or in rare cases, ask for one.

Crowds? I take anxiety meds and actively dissociate. Handshakes? Dissociate. People touch me without permission? Try not to punch them.

My family was fairly tactile growing up. They loved tickling. I would literally collapse on the floor crying. It was too much; it didn't feel like fun or whatever it is that people like about tickling. It felt more like pain.

I've tried explaining what it's like to people who are not touch repulsed. People on here will probably get it better.

Let's see... touching people makes me want to claw my skin off (it's somehow even worse if there's skin contact). Even when it feels less extreme, my skin is still crawling. I am constantly aware of every part of me that is touching someone else. It's too much, and then I get agitated on top of it.

Being touch repulsed with autism probably has a lot to do with me being asexual. I'm fine reading about sex (sometimes I even enjoy smut), I'm pretty uncomfortable watching sex in media, but the idea of ME touching another person, let alone naked... gross. Just gross.

[jusadode-blog]

How to fake empathy:

Think logically compassionate.

Someone has a cut? 

That must have hurt. You’ve gotten cuts before, and even if they didn’t sting so bad you know for a fact that others may have different pain tolerances and must react accordingly to their needs. You might think they’re over reacting, but that won’t help the circumstances and you just want to get this ordeal over as soon as possible, so offering a bandage and some medicine will easily create a high-profit low-cost situation (increase in friendship, raise their mood, end the crying/bleeding/complaining vs possible stagnation in friendship leading to a negative interpretation of you, lowering their mood, and prolonging the crying/bleeding/complaining.)

Someone lost someone they loved or something majorly awful happened?

That’s going to change their life in a drastic way. What was it like the last time you had something shift unexpectedly for the negative? They must be feeling similarly. Even if it turned out okay for you, remember what you wished others had done for you back then and try to offer it to others. It’s incredibly easy to think ahead and how individuals will heal eventually, but people live in the moment and right now they just need an ear and a shoulder.

Someone has had a serious event you cannot directly relate to?

Well, people express negative reactions to these things. Google up people looking for comfort/companionship going through similar things, and learn to mimic how others are comforting them. Try to make a meter-stick measurement for emotion to figure out how to properly assist them. If they were in a car crash, think of that time you wrecked your bike and thought you broke your leg but just tore up your tire--but like a lot worse and someone may have actually been injured and far more expensive.

Someone had a serious event you personally do not feel is serious but they keep emphasizing it’s importance to them?

Remember, your friendship is more valuable then your momentary comfort. It may annoy you to show compassion during this time, and it may be draining (especially if you weren’t emotionally-invested in the person to begin with), but it will pass and you will have a better friendship because of this (as well as make them happier, which may be another profit) 

It can be painfully easy to accidentally hurt your friends when you have either a lack of or just low-empathy. Instead of feeling remorse, you can also more often feel regret because of the consequences or the new reflection of your character that you interpret as negative. Know that these forms of regret are good enough to count as remorse, as they help you learn from your mistakes. Do know that there’s ways you can continue to be a good friend to people you enjoy, as well as you don’t need empathy or remorse to be a good person.

If you “fake” being a good person long enough, you might actually become a good person.

[lionpoxx]

i have too many hyperfixations at once help

[temothylol]

and its all a conspiracy created by Big Light™️ to keep us subdued!!!

[temothylol]

me, unsure whether someone is joking: *responds genuinely*

teacher: you take a lot of things literally haha

me, who also has very little filter: it’s the autism.

[temothylol]

some asshole: who cares 🙄

me: ME??????? I CARE ABOUT THINGN?????? I HAVE MY EMOTIONS INVESTED INNTHISNGA INSTEAD OF BEING AN EMOTIONLESS????? PLEASE YOUR APATHY IS MAKING ME PAIN WHY DO PEOPLE NOT CARE ABOUT RHINGSNSJJSBDHEJEBDH