#autistic wilson

[halfsizehellboy]

i love when autistics date each other and have nearly opposite sensory/support needs because it's hilarious. House does not recognize emotions well and struggles with connection, but obviously feels deeply and easily despite adamantly denying it. Wilson is, get this, hypoempathetic like house but sensory-seeks the empathetic feelings; which is why he's good at breaking news. he enjoys playing emotion!! he likes acting!! and i think acts of service and gift-giving is just love language, and he just doesn't differentiate platonic and romantic attraction easily (multiple ex-wives yet devoted to house, and love languages are extended to patients and especially ones he's friends with).

wilson likes old movies, and many of the things house does, but unlike house he's not shown to listen to loud music constantly; he doesn't like or need the auditory stimulation. he doesn't stim as much as house, but that could be also that he doesn't stim the way house does. he doesn't need that much external processing, while house plays with toys and rubber bands and his cane. i think wilson just moves a lot, wiggling his fingers or the like. personally i think he'd bite things a lot but he's spent a long time coasting through as normal and he has a reputation to uphold. House is never safe, though. something something sensory needs and distraction pain are the perfect excuse.

wilson needs just his long self-care routine to not change, and a couple other constants like house and his office. i think he likes to be efficient. house thrives on the consistency of a created chaos, mainly i think he's au-dhd and thats why, he cant have things the exact same too long without going bonkers. his office and his apartment are controlled spaces that stay the same, and other things can be wild for stimulation. They have enrichment time in their enclosure(s) with their bets and manipulation games. wilsons office is a better darkroom for quiet time. i cant stop thinking about this

[mossysoupfrog]

Your honor that man is stimming

[hilsonmybeloved]

HOUSE AND WILSON ARE T4T AUTISTIC GAYS/BI'S SND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT

[enlightened-existentialist]

House md season 5 episode 17 is the best episode i have watched so far for the autistic Wilson headcanon.

we get plenty of parallels to house and the patient about not doing the social cues dance and just saying what you feel, but the way that Wilson says he values his friendship with house basically saying to him that he doesn't want to do the social niceties thing all the time. Wilson uses his time with house to unmask. he says that the acting he has to constantly do with other people is exhausting, he tells house not to change.

also he flapped his fingers about while standing up

[wilson-the-gay-oncologist]

Please Hold Me Close| Autistic House/Wilson|1|

Sometimes Wilson wonders if he could not see House, in all of the older man’s glory. Last night, when he saw House in his sweatshirt, he couldn’t bring himself to ask the older man to take it off. It seemed right when he saw House in the grey McGill shirt, a piece of him on the person he cared about so much more than he realized.

But, let’s not say House is blind, because he’s not, not when it comes to Wilson, never when it comes to Wilson. He notices how Wilson steals his Mint and Wood cologne whenever he’s out of his own. He knows Wilson gets a lot of money for simply being a person who tells other people they have cancer cells slowly eating away at them, so he has enough to get more. He notices how Wilson smiles whenever House says something rude to push people out as if he was reeling Wilson in instead.

Now, House was lying on his carpet, aware of Wilson’s shuffling in the shared office. Wilson mutters something, or at least House believes it something irrelavent for his job.Wilson gets up and sits next to House on the floor. “I know you know House,” Wilson wasn’t looking at his ‘friend’. House sighs and gives a smile. “Yep, your pining is clear as daylight” He responds, no malice in his tone at all which made Wilson turn to him. His breath hitches “How long have you known?” House freezes when he saw the two clear drops in Wilson’s eyes. 

House stares, he should lie right? Say he didn’t know, act like he was confused, but he couldn’t. “Two Years,” House states, honestly. Wilson doesn’t say anything but he should’ve known House would’ve found out. House watches Wilson’s brown eyes and sighs. “It’s not something I w-was expecting, but I should have known you’d find out” Wilson looked so vulnerable, his brown eyes were so much more capable of emotion then House’s icy blue ones.

“You're an idiot,” House said, repeating the same thing Wilson had once said to him. Wilson looked down, “I know, I’m a shame to humanity” Wilson was obviously feeling like he was the only one in love with a man who didn’t care about people’s feelings, but even House was able to love “Your, my shame to humanity,” House pauses, “You should see what I see, James,” House shuffles closer to Wilson, putting his head in Wilson’s lap.

“What do you see?” Wilson asks, putting a shaky hand in House’s hair, House jumps at the sudden warmth, it had been a while since someone had touched him like this, and he cuddled into the warm hand. “A brilliant oncologist, with creamy-brown hair and eyes the color of my favorite chocolate, your kind, and so god-damn dumb happiness,” House closes his eyes “Your odd power to be able to read me like a book,” House sighs, “Y-your really special Wilson,” House’s breath hitched “I love you” Wilson moved his head to kiss House’s forehead, “I love you too House,” Wilson sighs “We better get to work, let’s go out to dinner later, huh?” House smirks, “Yep, see you then honey” House gets up, with Wilson’s gentle help. 

[halfsizehellboy]

oh man okay. more thinking

hot shit do i feel enlightened bc audhd House makes so much sense to me!!! he surrounds himself with chaos and novelty and stimulation but still adheres to things that don't change-- his apartment, when he lives in it, it always set up the same way. it's mentioned he's had the same guitar for many years, as well as numerous medical texts. He uses his same red mug all the time at the hospital (he has a designated hospital mug. it lives at the hospital and he only uses it at the hospital). he is very adamant about his office space-- it only changes drastically for him in season 8. just before he leaves. he and Wilson have a fun schedule-- bowling nights, poker nights, etc-- and he does spontaneous stuff all the time, but he orchestrates it. he enacts enrichment time for his fellows and Wilson. he canonically spaces out during/stops processing conversations all the time because he's thinking. he will forget to do basic things while on cases, and there's that one episode where he stays up all night because he's cooking something. he is the king of "shit i forgot to eat. i forgot to shower and pee. i forgot--"

while im thinking of eating!! he has that bad hunger recognition. he will forgo eating for days for cases, fixations, pain levels. he usually eats off of wilson's plate anyways, and i think wilson mainly eats because he's made it part of routine, and that if he forgets to eat house definitely forgets to eat, and that usually ends badly. i dont think house has any specific avoidances but he does usually go for pizza, or anything wilson's made. he likes fries.

the adhd bit makes him more prone to addiction (it's a real thing) and he does show those behaviors (vicodin, alcohol). he has to have either the puzzles or the substances, taking him off both fucked with him a lot (mayfield and afterwards). in prison he got managed doses of vicodin, and he was getting antsy and desperate for the challenge of a good case towards the end of that arc. he all but jumps on that heat allergy guy, risking his chances of parole multiple times to try and get close. side note, did y'all see his equation scribblings on the wall by his bunk? hes so silly

ive also been thinking like. we see very large-scale self destructive behaviors from nearly everyone in the show but we don't see a lot of self-regulation outside of house's stimming so that means i get to make up my own and project onto wilson.

wilson spends a lot of time masking at work so we don't see him fully let loose and i think that he is a fan of full body movement. he's jumping up and down. he's pacing the apartment and swingin his arms. he sways and rocks in place. at the hospital and places that aren't safe he keeps the stim energy to his hands/fingers, or taps his foot/bounces his leg-- things easy enough for neurotypicals to pass off as nervous energy. he loves to click pens but he only does it when he's alone or with house because he knows that other people find it annoying (house doesn't care, he starts clicking/tapping too and it's like they're drumming together). he and house learned morse code and annoy the ducklings and cuddy with it all the time.

bad times wilson scratches a lot (this is me projecting btw). at his scalp, at his arms, anywhere he can get to; and usually he's self conscious enough to do it where he can hide it under his clothes (house is unaffected and can tell anyways)(usually because he's there trying to help wilson stop scratching)(but if he's not he can still tell and wilson doesn't wanna know how). he also presses/rubs his face a lot (in general and not just bad times wilson), and bad times wilson gets abrasions on his eyelids/cheeks from his sweatshirt when he has a meltdown. i've seen another person talk about this, but i think he absolutely tears his cuticles up. he's managed to stop biting/tearing his nails down to nothing but between vigorous scrubbing for the OR and not liking lotion (sensory bad. i need it for my arms and the backs of my hands sometimes and i always wipe it off of my palms and fingers) his hands are so dry. house makes fun of him but he does carry around a nail file because he's trying to stop picking at his fingers regularly, and limit it to a bad times emergency regulatory behavior.

house fights meltdowns to the death. he hates having them, he hates having to be vulnerable like that (and that's a canonical trauma response). he has held one off through sheer will for an entire week before wilson called out sick for him and made him take a day off. they ended up taking a long weekend to recover. on the occasion they're both melting down at the same time, it's a multiple days affair. wilson will recognize what's happening and try to make sure everything in the apartment is low effort and accessible from the floor because house's meltdowns are more often than not pain response and that means that house stays on the floor. and when wilson is melting /neg he doesn't want to leave house. on a sillier(?) note they have a tally/competition for shortest meltdown (wilson), longest meltdown (house), fastest to meltdown (house), longest amount of time spent holding off a meltdown (house), most efficient meltdown (wilson), and most meltdowns located in the hospital (wilson).

man i'm gonna have to make a fic for this, it's getting wild just on posts

[halfsizehellboy]

wilson being primarily sensory avoidant makes so much sense to me. He’s on the quieter side, I've mentioned light sensitivity before, and he is super tame compared to house, who is definitely sensory seeking in a lot of ways. We've seen both of them forgo crowded parties or social events, either together or separately. wilson can’t keep his mask that long, and house just doesn't get along with people. I also don't think wilson likes the complexity of noise that is dozens of conversations, eating noises, background music, and appliance electricity that makes up a social dinner event. He likes to attend the talks and lectures because then at least only one person is talking. He likes it to be quiet and dark when he’s tired, and it’s the one thing he’s been able to enforce in his and house’s apartment. I think wilson’s got that light-touch aversion, so if you bear hug him and slap him on the shoulder every once in a while he’s all good. He definitely owns a weighted blanket. 

Which makes poetic sense that house is sensory seeking— his nerves are fucked from surgery and vicodin, and he doesn’t always feel stuff like he used to, but he still looks for stimulation everywhere. He blasts his music, throws his ball around, and starts arguments because that’s a fun thing for him. Sex is sensory, and he seeks that out too. He drinks alcohol because it makes him feel more that he wants and a little less of his leg. Jumping off the balcony into the pool? Sensory seeking that adrenaline rush. He spends that entire episode trying to drown out his bad feelings with good feelings. 

Their apartment is insane, and it took a long time to balance it. Their bedroom is soundproofed for many reasons, and once they’ve organized it how they like it it rarely changes (sometimes wilson will feel insane and reorganize the kitchen or bathroom). Their bedroom has always stayed the same. Wilson has a home office in the other bedroom that is always supposed to be a quiet zone, and House doesn’t take home work. They have two wheely office chairs though, because sometimes house’s leg can’t be weight bearing and he still needs to get around the apartment. There’s a designated sensory sheet, which is for hiding under or dimming lights. 

They sleep in ways that accommodate house’s leg, but wilson usually smashes his face against house’s chest/neck/back. sometimes wilson scratches his scalp more as stimming/compulsion or a habit, but it can quickly get to be harmful because it’s so often a bad times thing. if they’re at home, house will replace wilson’s hands with his own and scratch more with his fingertips than his nails, or just pets his head for a while. At the hospital he just slaps at wilson’s hands because it’s funnier. 

wilson does not have many sensory toys/fidgets or external regulation things, if he needs one he’ll usually just borrow one of house’s (with permission bc house needs to know where things are all the time). But he does have two rubbery sensory brush things (I'm projecting they're called tactile tigers. I have cried over almost losing one and I will be buried with mine. I also have two because one stays in my room and one goes everywhere outside my room) that he adores. He doesn't need them all the time but he always has one. He rubs it on the back of his neck, in his hands, all over his arms, even on his face. He absolutely keeps stealing the shot blockers from the peds wing because they’re awesome for fidgeting, and sometimes he needs one for his patients too. 

Ok, hear me out on this: I usually get tired of cgi/ newer movies because they don't interest me a lot, and I can like. Tell whats computered and what’s real. there’s less joy in it for me to figure out how they did it. I think wilson is the same way. Older movies had less tech, so they had to get creative with how they make things: jurassic park’s giant animatronic t rex, chocolate syrup blood in black and white movies, and all those other practical effects that lower/mid budget movies used to use. It’s often so much more interesting to recognize the spray painted oven mitt slug or the tinsel-wrapped terrier, than it is to see a completely computer generated creature. I am not shitting on CGI or CGI artists!! It’s super cool tech and an awesome profession!! I just have eyes that fatigue very easily, and older movies aren’t as HD ergo not as hard on my eyes. And I like figuring out how they did practical effects and I think wilson would really like that too. 

I think next i’m gonna ramble about sexy things?? I feel insane

[wilson-the-gay-oncologist]

Please Hold Me Close||3|

House yawned, he and Wilson were home now, and House didn’t want to get up. He thought of Wilson’s first autistic meltdown, they had been in a mall and a young teen was acting up, their parent yelled at them and Wilson got scared, freaked out when the father hit the boy and started to cry, that had made at least twenty people aware of them. 

“Wilson?” House knowing Wilson was having a meltdown, given he was autistic himself. “He gonna hurt me!” The father paused and his face became ashamed as he looked at his son, “What’s wrong with him?” asked the teen. “Wilson!” House started to restrain the younger man. 

“No owie, I’ll be good!” House started to freak but he reeled it in, it would be harder for people not to look if they saw two autistic people having a meltdown, but this first meltdown was enough to realize why Wilson never talked about his father. 

“H-ouse?” Wilson was up yawning softly, “Hmm?” House looked at his Wilson, his Jimmy. “I wanna t-tell you a-about my dad” What was bringing this up? “Alright surely he can’t be as bad as mine” Wilson sniffled “He was worse” House froze, No, No, No, Wilson hadn’t been.

“When I was e-eleven he um, touched me” House only saw Wilson “I didn’t understand why he was touching my icky parts or my privates to make me feel good.” Wilson looked down, “It hurt a-a lot.” A growl came from House, he wanted to kill someone, Wilson’s father.

“It continued until I was sixteen, when I got the hell out of there.” He sniffled, “I used to have two brothers House.” House looked at Wilson, “I-I killed my other one” House couldn’t believe it, Wilson killing someone? “He tried to bring me back when I was eighteen, but I was smarter than he thought, I-I hadn’t known he was getting the same treatment I had, Mama

Wilson did her best t-to take care of him, he was always the better brother she would say” Tears welled up in Jimmy’s eyes.

“I got so scared, he didn’t know to never touch me in my lower parts, he wasn’t doing it on purpose, b-but I lashed out, had a meltdown, and when it was over the cops were dragging me into an ambulance and my house was burning, I knew my screams that my brother was dead, I killed him, I cried his name so many times,” Wilson looked up to see what House was feeling. 

House looked at Wilson with eyes unreadable, “Continue Wilson” Wilson became afraid, House was usally more verbal, “He wasn’t the only person I killed, my father had confronted me about it,” House closed his eyes “I killed him too, in colder blood, I didn’t call out his name, I didn’t even know what happened, just that I pushed him and he fell off my balcony, I was so struck by my own feelings that the cops must’ve thought I was in shock, I wasn’t really, I was free” House gave a gentle smile, eyes still unreadable somehow. 

“You never seemed like the one who’d kill, Jimmy” House pulled Wilson closer to him and kissed Wilson’s neck softly “My Jimmy” Wilson knew his fear was stupid, House loved him, murderer or not. House yawned and cuddled his lover’s pulse point, his favorite spot to stim.

“Let’s get back to bed, Jimmy,” He whispered. And they did.