The Long Way Back
No one owes Azula anything.
Go with me here. I don't hate Azula. I think she's a wonderfully complicated and genuinely frightening villain. But I do still think she's a villain.
Azula did a lot of harm, and while the fact that she was very probably abused is an explanation for why she is the way she is, it's not an excuse, and it doesn't mean she doesn't enjoy it. She very nearly succeeded in killing Iroh, and Aang only survived because of Katara's intervention (I won't go into my belief that she's killed before that...but yeah, she absolutely has). Azula's on-screen kill count only remains at 0 because of plot convenience (and the fact that it's a kids' show). That's not even getting into all the ways she was terrible to Zuko and added psychological abuse to what he was already getting from Ozai. She's never remorseful about any of it.
That lack of remorse is what confuses me most about apologists who think that Azula deserves not only to be forgiven but to be reconciled with her family and friends (and the friends of her family). Don't get me wrong, I'm sure that Zuko and even Iroh would forgive Azula, it wouldn't necessarily mean that either of them would want to reconcile with her. Forgiveness and reconciliation aren't the same thing. Forgiveness can be part of one's personal journey of healing, but it doesn't mean that one will seek reconciliation with the person who wronged them. For the sake of their own mental health and well-being, a person may choose to forgive abusive family members, but still ultimately be no contact with them. That's not contradictory. Sometimes letting go of the past means leaving people there.
On the other side of that, it's completely understandable that after being pushed and harmed and tortured, someone may decide not to forgive the person who caused the harm. This idea that any of the Gaang, but specifically Katara should have to forgive Azula is frankly ridiculous. Yes, Katara forgave Zuko, but don't forget, Zuko had to work for that forgiveness. He wanted that forgiveness. The context of Katara and Zuko's reconciliation is very specific to them. It does not mean that Katara is going to extend the same forgiveness and reconciliation to everyone. Katara is forgiving, yes, but only to a point. She has her limits. I have yet to see anyone present a compelling reason for Katara to not only forgive Azula, but to want to have any sort of relationship with her. I have yet to see any compelling reason that Azula would care to have Katara's forgiveness. Katara's relationship with Zuko isn't enough on its own. I could see somewhere down the line them being cordial to each other for Zuko's sake (assuming Azula isn't exiled forever because of what she did), but that's it.
If Zuko forgave Azula and reconciled with her, he wouldn't force Katara to do the same. He would be very understanding of Katara keeping her distance from Azula, even keeping her children away, because, at the end of the day, Azula isn't owed a relationship with anyone. She isn't owed reconciliation with anyone. Further, she hasn't earned reconciliation or a relationship with anyone. You can absolutely headcanon that she has. You can headcanon that Aang got past her killing him, or that Sokka and Suki got past her (implied) torture of Suki. That's totally fine. But personally, I prefer not to, and I think Azula is more interesting for it.


















