#bamf batman

[frownyalfred]

every batkid -- hell, even Clark -- knows what Bruce's little heh means on patrol. it's not quite a grunt or an exhale, but it's the sound that comes out of his mouth (usually after being backhanded into a wall) that signals Hell To Come. heh, as he's climbing to his feet, bleeding from the mouth and immensely pleased by a potential challenge. heh, you think you can reach Robin behind me and you are So Wrong. heh, thank you for that concussion because I already have one and two concussions cancel out and I'm more than pleased to show you how --

[guildofscribes]

The concept of Batman from the mind of a scared child might be the very best outcome of this whole, messed up tragedy.

Adult Bruce lived up to the concept of Good People coming to rescue people in trouble. That Good People should find the people who need help. That rescue came for those who needed it. Trouble that he hadn’t been rescued from. That Bad People who do bad things to good people should have something to be afraid of too.

Because the night he and his parents needed rescue from bad people, nobody came. His trouble was ignored. The bad people got away.

Bruce looked at all the people who felt comfortable and safe in the darkness to wait for victims to pass by, and he basically said; “No, you don’t get to feel safe when you’re doing wrong anymore. You step into the shadows, and you will shiver and pray to a God who you probably don’t believe in that I’m not already there waiting for you.”

[snakeredbirdbatkatana]

In a way I am one of the most basic and kind of problematic in a way fan.

Because I truly believe my favorite character will always somehow win in a fight.

However, my favorite character is Batman/his children.

So realistically, that plot armor is stronger than their raging orphan issues.

Or is the plot armor is the ranging orphan issues!

I’ve connect the dots!!!

[frownyalfred]

“Batman is too overpowered” sometimes the beauty of a good BAMF!Bruce Wayne story comes from the moments where being undetectable, being overpowered, being so highly-trained and prepared for anything, simply don’t matter. that’s what I think critics don’t get — it’s the gap between those two things that is so intensely satisfying. give him infinite prep time, yes, let him try and save the day and suddenly realize that he can’t. that it simply isn’t possible. let him be OP and still fail.

[guildofscribes]

Gotham’s populace probably have such wide and varied opinions on the Batman.

Is he just a dude dressed as a bat?

Is he insane and somehow thinks he’s doing the best thing ever? Fulfilling some mission his addled brain cooked up?

Is he a demon, come to drag evildoers into the depths of hell?

Is he an avenging angel set upon Gotham with the restraints of God upon him to kill no man, but to save the helpless and punish the wicked?

Is he a spirit?

Is he a shadow cryptid?

Nobody can figure it out.

Did he split off portions of himself as avatars to do his will around Gotham?

Does he attract like-spirits and baby eldrich beasts to conquer the shadows?

Is he some mutated, murdered child’s spirit that refused to move on and instead fashioned itself into an avenging Creachur that makes a point of saving children?

[guildofscribes]

Okay, but Brucie Wayne is actually a little smart. He got midway through medical school, after all. He made good enough grades that he could have graduated if he wanted to.

Sure he’s a little air-headed, but he’s not super bad at investment decisions.

Okay, so that deal fell through, but it came up that the other company was in some really bad stuff, and it’s like he has a sixth sense about that kind of thing! If he starts dragging his heels, he’s got a bad vibe, and he’s gotten out of what would have been some really bad deals for Wayne Enterprises!

And with his hires, he’s absolutely got a knack for picking people! He gets a bad vibe on a guy, and that dude is out so fast! But the good folks? He hangs onto those! So Wayne Enterprises is always doing pretty good, always expanding branches, racking a profit, and dumping gear donations on charities all around Gotham!

Like, if Brucie says he’s got bad vibes about next Thursday, February third, you can bet your buttons I’m staying home or finding a fallout shelter. I don’t know what that guy drinks in the morning, but his vibe-feelers are immaculate.

Brucie is smart enough to get by in life, and he’s actually doing okay. Sure, the puff pieces get a little crazy, and he really needs to stop the ski trips… how many times can a guy wipe out on the slopes before he gets that he’s just not built for skiing? The broken bones from ski trip disasters are literally insane…

But yeah! Brucie is a nice guy, and he’s got some gray matter between his ears. Just- bless him- he’s a little spacy sometimes too.

[guildofscribes]

Okay, hear me out…

Bruce Wayne doesn’t have pretty privilege.

Consider, Bruce Wayne has human tank privileges.

This guy can see over any crowd by a head and shoulders height, and his shoulders are wide enough to part the seas, just about. People jump out of this guy’s way because he might legitimately not see them there, and he’s huge. Nobody wants to be tripped on by a giant.

Honestly, it’s probably self-preservation if you’re in the path of a giant with a rep for clutz-flavored catastrophes.

Bruce Wayne is a huge guy who might not mean to trip on you, but his line of sight is so far up there, and gravity pulls hard on two hundred pounds of dude and muscles, and bless his heart, he’s a bit of a space cadet. He means no harm… just, he’s a mess. Bless the boy. He’ll definitely pay to have your clothes cleaned, your bills paid if you get hurt, anything like that.

He’s just a huge guy, with a high center of gravity and not the best luck.

[guildofscribes]

Oh gosh, just imagining Bruce with Old Man Strength… except this dude was a whole tank for the majority of his life.

Like, Bruce Wayne would be that one old man who just, never fell. Had good balance, good grip strength, could hold all the babies (because we all know kids know Good People and that’s what Bruce is), and he’d do the knee-bounce/pony-ride for little kids bored outta’ their minds at parties and not get gassed after two kids.

You never know what his limit for activity is, because he seems to have reserves to pull from whenever they’re needed. Yes he’s old and would like to be home before it goes past ten, but he’ll make time for someone who actually needed it.

He’s definitely the serious grandfatherly type to cut in gracefully on a dance that’s not going in a civil fashion. And he’s sturdy enough to stand against prideful young fops who don’t like being corrected on their behavior.

Sure, he’s an old man with a cane, but he’s still a giant man. His hair is white, but he’s still quick-witted. He’s got a limp, but he’s steady, it’s that darn knee he blew out all those years ago on a lousy skydive landing. It still works though!

I just… Old Man Bruce would still be terrfying when he wanted to be, if you’re not a good person. He would probably also be the most inexplicably safe-feeling person in a given room if you’re a decent individual.

He’s got all the experience to do literally anything he wants to do, he can’t be backed into a corner he doesn’t want to be in, he’s got the muscle and bone density to take care of himself until his heart literally just beats itself out or something.

I imagine he’s probably a bit standoffish, probably keeps mostly to himself, only draws attention for specific causes and for a purpose. He’s sharp still, has a firm grasp on the happenings in Gotham, he cracks the best jokes if you can get him in the right mood, his commentary while people-watching at any event is both interesting and dryly funny, he has amassed such a wide range of seemingly random information that if you can get him going on a subject, it’s more interesting than any award-winning documentary.

He’s just this powerful figure that’s been there so long, everyone just knows he’s safe. Like the old watchdog that everyone thinks is just a pet now, but it’s still strong and very much on the job… just a smidge slower and on the down low.

I don’t know. Just… thoughts today.