someone's got a crush! (⸝⸝๑﹏๑⸝⸝)
a sequel to this, more guests and neighbours are crushing on you BAD
❥ sfw ꕀ headcanons ꕀ gender neutral reader ꕀ these all assume that the reader is another guest in the protagonist's house rather than being a homeowner themselves. it complicates the crushes/chances of getting together if it's not your home, you get me???
❥ starring the immortal man, bar guy, pale intruder, vigilante, and blinded man. taking requests for part 3!
IMMORTAL MAN
✦ 'crush' is a flimsy word for how yakob feels about you. he recognizes you from another life, and that's why he is drawn to you. his goal is to relearn you, not 'get to know' you.
✦ "there you are. i was getting worried you wouldn't make it. you're tougher than i gave you credit for." is the first thing he says to you. and you're like... what? who??? hello???--?
✦ he's touchy. slinging an arm around you or blotting food from your lips mid-conversation like it's nothing.
✦ but... sometimes yakob says things that make you wonder if he does know you from another life. you do not recognize this man, he is a stranger to you, yet he'll casually mention one of your quirks or memories with a sly grin on his face.
✦ you turn your nose up at a shoddy apocalypse meal and he'll joke about how the days of eating [your favourite food] with [your favourite toppings] and [favourite drink], and [favourite dessert] are long gone. he thinks it's cute when you're bewildered.
✦ "i thought you said it's romantic for a man to remember the little things?" is his go-to response whenever you ask how he knows such intimate details about you. which you never said to him either, but his confidence convinces you.
✦ asks random questions about you, to see if anything's changed between lives. it leads to some interesting conversations. you're wearing a blue shirt, he'll ask "blue suits you pretty damn well. is green still your favourite?" yes he is the mf to ask his crush for their favourite colour.
✦ it hurts that you don't recognize him. when you aren't looking, he stares at you like a pathetic yearning dog as he memorizes your features and falls in love with you all over again.
✦ when he's drunk, he's more desperate and nosy than his cocky sober self. "you really look at me and feel nothing? look into my eyes. no- just- just look, without looking away- you've gotta recognize something. c'mon, i knew it was you before you said a word to me. i don't feel familiar at all? you're sure?"
✦ please return this man's feelings 😭🙏 even if you don't understand or believe in the whole immortality thing, just stay by his side please
BAR GUY
✦ yesenin thought crushes were a fleeting thing of the past. he fully believed he's too miserable to consider romance, that everyone is too crazy for love.
✦ after a few drinks and heart-to-heart conversations, he's smitten and takes his jaded thoughts about love back. your answers always seem to comfort him, even if you're just stating your mind. he likes hearing you talk.
✦ if you get a hangover after your drunken chats, he'll take care of you and will give the homeowner a MOUTHFUL if he tries to test you for signs while you're vulnerable.
✦ when the homeowner checks you for signs in general, yesenin will use his height to intimidate him. he won't let anyone give you a hard time. he's very gentlemanly, offering you a drink the moment you homeowner leaves you two alone.
✦ if you don't drink, he'll be confused but find a way to admire you from it. "you want to be sober when you die, not shitfaced. i see you have lots of dignity left. ha.. you have a heart still."
✦ he will absolutely read you poems from his book, picking out the ones written about lovers. "ahem. i'd like to read you a poem that reminded me of you. you have lots in common with the author's muse.. it says they got married. lucky bastards."
✦ he's the most upfront about his feelings. he's mature and understands how dangerous the world is, that keeping secrets is unnecessary stress.
✦ after a few days of knowing you he'll calmly tell you: "i enjoy our talks more than any other, my good friend. your face, your voice, everything about you keeps me sane. i have to confess now. what if we don't live to see tomorrow? i can't take my feelings for you to my grave, even if it's all so pointless. it'd be insanity to not acknowledge your beauty while people are being gunned down for their teeth and eyes."
PALE INTRUDER
✦ the homeowner answers the door one night and you hear an eerie voice from the porch describing you. you didn't know it, but somebody has been stalking you long before you sheltered in this home.
✦ obviously, you aren't going to be thrown outside and offered to the pale man. so he asks for you every night, when the homeowner answers the door. "i know they're inside. who are they to you? nobody. but to me? ahh.. everything. it's no good that you keep them from me, but i can't forget my manners and break into a full house..."
✦ if you sleep near a window, the sound of scratching wakes you up.
✦ "open the blinds. oooopen sesame." once he knows you're awake. he's determined. "nobody in this house will notice if you slip out. what's keeping you in this purgatory? survival? they'll turn on you soon. me, i would never! i'm riiiight here. come out, where you belong!"
✦ the pale intruder will pspspsps you like you're a cat. you think you're going nuts, hearing cooing noises coming from the walls, but it's him trying to serenade you.
✦ he's always outside. where's the vigilante when you need him 💀
✦ you're almost used to the constant scratching, mewing, whistling, humming, and thumping on nights where he yearns for you particularly bad.
✦ one night, you linger near the peephole after the homeowner goes to bed. the pale man is on the other side, and he flaunts himself for you like a male peacock. he wants you to look at him and convince you that he's cozier than the house you're holed up in.
✦ he also wants you to become a super visitor. "you could get a body like mine if you open the door. i know you don't like your current one, despite it making me ravenous. why delay the inevitable?" ew ew okay he's licking the peephole
✦ "stop playing with your breakable hands. you know what to do... the doorknob is right there." hold on, how does he know that you're fidgeting with your hands if the door is shut? is he that much of a stalker that he knows all your quirks?
✦ you open the windows one morning and blood is smeared on the glass in the crude shape of a cartoon heart. he doesn't know your initials, but he'd have written them if he did. he's corny enough to coat his lips in somebody's blood and leave a mockery of lipstick stain on the window.
✦ "i 🫀 u" with an Actual Human Heart stuck on the windowsill. lovely!
VIGILANTE
✦ crush? he's not gonna call it that. he's not 12 anymore. but you're too special for him to just call you jackass or visitor like everybody else....
✦ he's kept in the neighborhood by 3 things: his brother's burnt house with memories attached to it, the pale intruder who's all over tv, and the hermit's house with his favourite survivor in it.
✦ he brings you stuff from his expeditions. beer, enerjeka, cigarettes, lighters, knives, jewelry looted from VISITORS... when the homeowner answers the door, he makes it clear it's for YOU. "don't let anybody else get their filthy paws on this. i'll blow their heads off."
✦ yes, even if he thinks someone is human, he will shoot them if you say you couldn't drink your gift from him because a guest took it from the fridge. even if it's a total misunderstanding. even if the guest is a totally normal person who apologizes and promises they'll be more careful next time. "i risked my fuckin' neck to bring them that shit! you think i play around when it comes to them?!"
✦ he's... more lenient when it comes to testing you. if you show a symptom of being a visitor, he treats it as if he noticed a sign on himself- making you fix it immediately then snarkily telling you to be careful.
✦ he's so corny after checking your eyes and seeing bits of red. "red eyes, huh? me too. justice never sleeps.. but you better get some shuteye if you wanna survive a visitor attack."
✦ like the protagonist in part 1 of my crush series, he keeps your aura photo in his pocket. "heh, is this your way of tellin me you were a supermodel before shit went down? ...don't ask for it back. it's my lucky rabbit's foot."
✦ he doesn't believe in auras and thinks it's nonsense, but he looks at it like a husband staring at his spouse while dying in a war lmao.
✦ if anyone in the wild asks who that is and why he stares at their photo on his smoke breaks, he hits them with "none of your fuckin' business. you think i'd tell you who they are and let the visitors get them?! no way.. you're one of them! you can't trick me!"
✦ probably wouldn't 'date' you because love is a weakness to him and he's too busy, but he will always come back to the house and check on you.
✦ he's paranoid that you'll get attacked by a visitor. his mind has deluded him into thinking you won't ever turn into one and you're human like him. when he checks you, he comments about you needing more muscle instead of you passing his tests. shooting you isn't a goal of his.
✦ depending on whether you consider yourself strong or weak, he either checks on you because you have a fire inside you that he loves and needs to keep lit... or, if you're weaker, it's because you're not built for this type of world and you're his little responsibility. his prettiest problem fr
BLINDED MAN
✦ he wishes so badly he could see you. he makes excuses to touch your face so he can map it and visualize your appearance in his head. "whoa! i didn't see you there- i mean, well, i didn't hear your voice coming from there..." he chuckles, knowing damn well he purposefully cupped your cheek while chatting and that was no accident.
✦ or he'll slip in questions about your appearance while talking with you at the table. "my hair has never been so long, at least i have no bangs to worry about... haha, what about you? can you relate?"
✦ anytime somebody walks into the kitchen, he perks up in case it's you. he's disappointed whenever it's not. if you see him biting his lip while you're talking and walking at the same time, that's him trying to memorize the sound and pattern of your footsteps.
✦ you are the one person he doesn't talk to about IT. he doesn't want to burden you with its existence, meanwhile he sounds like a rambling madman to everyone else.
✦ the topic only arises if you bring it up first, checking in on him. he tries to deflect your questions because he likes you. "i cannot stop IT from spreading like a plague. no one can. but... i can keep it at bay right here, right now. hey, would you rather have a runny nose forever or a sore throat forever? aha... just because, i mentioned plagues, and you seem to care a lot about me getting sick.."
✦ he's building up the courage to reach for your hand one day. you've checked his sockets and he grabbed at you as a reaction to the pain, but he doesn't count that. he's picturing you two talking and he links hands with you as an affectionate gesture.. but it's so nerve-wracking to him.
✦ he thought he was doomed the moment he laid eyes on IT, that the rest of his sorry existence would be spent warning people and toiling away. but your conversations with him make him feel like his old self. the first person to give him butterflies after thinking he could only feel nauseous dread.
part 2 took a while because this is my first time writing for these guys x___x if they're ooc you saw nothing. if you enjoyed then yiipeee
