When something seems far away, it is always easy to take those first few steps in an effort to attain it but when something is so close that you could almost taste it, those last couple of steps are the hardest ones you will ever take.
I think that best describes my progression to the finish line. My first two years in undergrad were a breeze - I felt unstoppable. During the exam period I always felt a little tense and a lot on edge but during the semester, with every assignment, presentation and quiz, I felt pretty confident in my abilities. It was the last year, I began to doubt everything.
Similarly, in law school, the first year passed by with little issue. My last was the real struggle. Every hurdle felt near insurmountable. Legal aid, court visits and reports, assignments, seminars, mock trials - it felt like a pile of endless burden. The worst of them all being preparation for my final exams.
I made sure I kept up with the pace of my seminars, ensured I took good notes, simplified them into powerpoint presentations, diagrams, post-its. You name the method I probably used it. However, as the weeks drew nearer to my exams, the worry and doubt grew bigger. I would wake up and literally suffer two or three anxiety attacks throughout the day.
There was no reason for me to hold myself captive to fear and self-doubt yet I couldn’t help it. This was the last walk in my five year journey and I could really feel the pressure. With every successful paper I wrote, the worry did not stop. In fact, it intensified. I thought I am going to mess this up somehow.
I didn’t. At least I don’t feel like I did.
Through God and with the help of the best support system ever on my side, I was able to surmount what I thought was insurmountable. Five years of my legal education and training are finally behind me and DAMN IT FEELS GOOD!
I only pray now for successful results.