Feb 5
young tuco and nacho being curious because why not
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young tuco and nacho being curious because why not
“Die For It…”
More laloward fanfic because I’m spiraling. BIG WARNING: heavy angst and domestic abuse.
THWACK!
Hector’s cane was a familiar instrument. One that Lalo Salamanca knew all too well. Every time he pissed his elders off in his youth, the stubbed end of that cane in the center of his head was a painful reminder for him not to do it again. To Lalo, it was discipline for a disrespectful nephew. Anyone with their head screwed on right would have rightly have called it abuse.
Especially someone like Howard.
After shrieking and watching the man he loved get pummeled to the ground, something in the corporate lawyer snapped. All his instincts would normally tell him violence was never worth it. Assault came with charges, legal expenses, and a shitload of tedious paperwork…but because of Lalo—or “Lorenzo” as he knew him—Howard dove in anyway. A blink, and that damned cane careened across the room. Howard soon yanked it from the man’s hands. The sound of clattering metal then echoed off the walls. Not even the night guards could stay silent.
“What the HELL is wrong with you!? You…You miserable son of a bitch!”
The gobsmacked look across Hector’s face didn’t phase him. Had he known who he was talking to in that moment, it should have terrified him. But Howard just kept ranting and raving. How dare this so-called ‘family man’ lay hands on his nephew this way. How dare he pull this pathetic stunt out of nowhere. All Lalo had done was plead their case. This was where he learned family was everything? Air became a scarce commodity as Howard cursed him out between breaths. It wasn’t until he felt firm, steady hands pulling him away when the Hamlin son paused for anything.
“Baby, go! Please, just go!”
Howard stood there, aghast, watching for a crack in Lalo’s face. How could anyone defend a man that hurt them so brutally? What would the old bastard do as soon as he left?
“Trust me, you’re in way more danger than I could ever be. GO.”
Howard tried one more time. He really didn’t want to leave his man alone, not with a band of freaks. It took Lalo’s hands caressing his face and a firm “Howie, do as I say.” to make a dent in his confidence. Staring at the crowd of relatives that formed in front of him, he headed for the door. He didn’t close it without finally glaring at Hector. Never in his life had he been so ballsy. He had no idea he just rattled the head of a cutthroat cartel ring, cursing and shoving a Don of Salamancas. All he knew was that his Lorenzo, sweet and charming Lorenzo, was reduced to bruises by his own uncle. He thought the man begging him to leave never had a mean bone in his body.
“Lorenzo…I love you…” was all he said as he left.
Inside, Lalo struggled to stay on his feet. Wiping traces of blood from his nose and face, he turned to fully face his uncle. Surprisingly, Hector hadn’t thrown himself into a cardiac fit. No, his elder remained with an expression that almost looked impressed. Four agonizing minutes, and neither one broke their eye contact.
“The gringo…he willing to die for you?”
Lalo held his gaze. “Yes.”
That night, Howard almost did.
How successful would Lalo Salamanca…
…be if they decided to become a pro-wrestler?
Yes on the microphone skills / Yes on the wrestling skills
Yes on the microphone skills / No on the wrestling skills
No on the microphone skills / Yes on the wrestling skills
No on the microphone skills / No on the wrestling skills
Would you like to submit a character? Click this link if you do!
"This place is like hundreds of years old, how many people you think have died here?"
"Dude."
AU where Nacho and Jesse go to Europe
LALO POV: You meet Nacho’s brothers (they don’t seem to like you)
(Click for better quality)
imparting my self indulgent bcs oc on you all sorry :3
more abt her hereee
AU where Gus is secretly a Megan Thee Stallion Stan;
*In the back room sweeping up*
Gus: YALL GOOFY-ASS HOES LOOK SO DUMB EVERY TIME YALL CELEBRATE FAKE NEWWWWWS
( @thenarrator385 - Continued from here!)
“What’ll we do with the money?” Thursday’s eyes light up. She is only too happy to oblige with sharing her ideas, especially when it comes to her partner-in-crime! “Well, first we’re gonna put it all down on the floor somewhere. Make a nice, big, comfy bed of money. Then we’re gonna roll around in it like a couple of idiots - except we aren’t idiots, we’re GENIUSES, because this whole idea is nothing short of BRILLIANT. Then we’re gonna pick it all back up and put it back into whatever bags we took it out of - unless it was delivered to us in boxes, it’s just that- usually these kinds of exchanges are done with those big suspicious black duffel bags, right? Then, we go see how much we can put into the vending machine before it tell us to fuck off. After that? Who knows! We’ll do whatever we want! Maybe start by making some cool papier-mâché with the cash.”
After her explanation, she laughs a little bit and claps her hands along with him.
“We’re gonna do so well here, Elliot! I just know it! Victor and Cyrus hate each other’s guts, and we’re gonna get to watch it all unfold, hehehehe.”
Thursday takes his cue adjusting his suit to adjust her own too. They can never be too perfect, can they? Gotta make sure that each little crease is lying just the right way to communicate that certain special law-abiding pizzazz to any passersby.
She grins back at him. “All right, the plan. Here’s what I propose.”
“First, we need to get you into my control booth,” she explains, and as she does she is gesturing a lot with her hands, making a lot of facial expressions, moving around, and is just plain very animated. “You’ve never been there before, but it’s not too difficult - as long as you don’t mind heights and climbing a really big ladder. And don’t worry about our suits! They’ll be fine, nothing a little brushing here and there won’t fix. Anyway, yeah, we get you into my and Cyrus’ control booth, and I’m sure that we’ll be able to, um, convince him to leave, you know, persuade him, give him a gentle nudge. Definitely nothing to do with threatening him. No, we don’t want to make him too suspicious, do we? I’m sure our combined presence alone will be enough to convince him to leave.”
“After that, he’ll go down the ladder. Now, to get downstairs into the main office area from there, he’ll have to get into the elevator. Here’s where we’ll be trapping our first, ah, client. See, we have to trap Cyrus first, because from the control booth he can see everything. If we try to trap Victor first, then Cyrus will see that and then we’ll just be stuck listening to him bitch and moan the whole time about it without a snowball’s chance in hell of getting any money out of either party. Not to mention not getting to see them tear into each other.”
“So! After we’ve done that, we’ll need to call Victor over to my office. We can do that from my computer. Does Victor have a computer? If so, we can send him a message from mine telling him, I don’t know, that he’s the 1,000,000th visitor to his email account and that he’s won a free iPod Nano as a result. He’ll fall for it, I’m sure, based on what you said about him being stupid, ehehehe.”
“We’ll give him explicit directions on where to meet us so that he may receive his free iPod Nano, and of course those directions will lead him into the elevator where Cyrus is waiting.”
“Now, the tricky part is making sure that Victor actually gets into the elevator with Cyrus, as I am certain the moment he sees him he’s not gonna want to go in. So, I suggest we plant an actual iPod Nano on Cyrus before he leaves the control booth. We’ll have to make it so it’s obvious to anybody looking for it, but not obvious to Cyrus himself. So- maybe we’ll tape it onto his back or something. I think it could work. I’ll give him a good ol’ pat on the back as he leaves, he’ll never suspect a thing.”
“Anyway, when Victor sees that iPod, he’s gonna probably lunge for it. I mean, it’s free! And it’s his! He won it fair and square simply by checking his email! He’s not gonna just walk away without getting what he came all that way for! No way! So he’s gonna get into the elevator with Cyrus at that point. If Cyrus happens to be facing in the wrong direction and Victor doesn’t see it, well, we’ll get on the ol’ microphone and announce that the prize is actually in the elevator and that Cyrus stole it or something. That’ll make Victor even more mad and get in there to get it, and also more likely to cause the two of them to fight.”
“And that’s when I’ll close the elevator on them and stop it from working. Ahahahahahaha!” Thursday rears back in her best villain laugh. “What do you think, Elliot? You ready to give it a go, or do you have another plan or thoughts? Hahahahaha!”