#bi anon

[damnfandomproblems]

"The Bi Guy" Superpost

This is where we're gathering all the remaining inbox items submitted by that one anon. Keep in mind that you may still see some posted in the fandom problem queue, these were submissions that were already scheduled in advance before we decided to finish them all off in one big post.

People have dubbed this submitter "the bi anon", but we're just going to post all remaining submissions of his. This may include some that don't mention bisexuality at all. Submissions from other users on the topic of bisexuality will not be included in this and will receive the normal Fandom Problem image format at some point.

And just a disclaimer in advance, since these were all submitted on anon, we're just making our best guesses for which posts are his, based on formatting, proximity, theme, and for lack of better words, "vibes". It's possible that we could make a mistake at some point and include submissions from other posters. We apologize in advance if we make any mistakes.

Originally we planned to include everything into one big post, but there were so many and the post was already getting so long that I've decided to break it up into a few separate posts. This first post will comprise all the submissions he's sent from the months of February 2024 through May of 2024. So, four months, and we've still got quite a bit of catching up to do. Remaining posts to follow in the coming days.

February 2024:

Most of the time, it's pretty clear and feels like a vast majority of fandoms and in general, don't really care about bi men and only "care" about bisexual men either in fictional characters, in theory, in headcanons, celebrities, or celebrities they headcanon as bi. That last one is in the same boat as shipping real people. Don't do that. It's a huge ick and very gross. In addition to that, it's annoying watching the same people who praise and hype up a (internet) celebrity for having a "queer" taste in women, than assume those are the only men who are like that and men in general like this don't exist. Ridiculous to say, bi men have a "queer" taste in women than not stand by that view, say you need to be bi to be like this than not stand by said view and only pick a select few (straight) men as the good ones. It's even more irritating using this to dunk on men in general. Reinforcing stereotypes, one stereotype at a time. It also doesn't help that erasure is seen as a "privilege" for bi men, when much of the same people who claim that hate erasure directed towards themselves and don't hesitate to call it bigotry. "Bi men face a lot of erasure, therefore in being forgotten about and invisible, they have it easy! The fact they're erased and ignored means nothing bad happens to them!" Way to keep more in the closet. I understand them in some cases; why come out to a community that will ignore you and actively assume nothing bad happens? This view also does nothing for fanbases. Caring about fictional characters over real people will never be a good thing. Writing off all male fans as a bunch of dumb straight incels is never going to be a good thing. I wish things were different. Watching bi men posts turn into posts about fictional characters, and headcanons are never going to be good.

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"If there were more canon bi male characters, they would be shipped with canon bi female characters!" Lol, no, they wouldn't be. When a fanbase makes it crystal clear that they never want to see a (bi) female character as much as look in the same direction as a male character, they mean it. Also, why do we need qualifiers before accepting that some fans just genuinely like "straight" pairings? It's possible to just like it and call it a day. There's nothing wrong with that. And that shouldn't earn negativity from other fans who can just adhere to a "don't like it, don't read it," view when participating in fandoms. Lastly, what a fan does in headcanons is rarely an indicator of what they say about canon. Otherwise, you would see a lot more tolerance for bi female characters being shipped with men or acknowledged as being attracted to men in canon because of all the headcanons brought up the moment a "good straight" pairing rolls around.

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Many times, a fanbase comes up with some of the most boring and annoying reasons other fans should never even look at putting a female character with a male character. Or even just m/f ships in general. When they themselves could adopt a "I don't ship it but I'll leave shippers of it be," view, as opposed to bullying or forcing other fans to never touch these kinds of ships. "The main female character is in a relationship of the same gender!" I can see that. Not an indicator of who other female characters should be shipped with. Also, there will always be fans who ship the main character with other characters "She's a strong independent woman!" Falling in love is not a weakness, even for "strong" female characters. A fictional woman is not a weaker character for falling for a man and loving one deeply. "She's bi, that means never shipping her with a man!" I don't believe you know what that means. Or you just don't respect a bi female character being attracted to men. Also, it's possible to accept the fact that you'll never ship her with any of the male characters, but plenty of other fans will. "All the male characters suck!" That's an opinion. Even if that's somehow the case, OCs exist. "No one is allowed to ship her (with men)!" Not up to you. "She was abused by a man in canon! That means romanticizing abuse if you ship her with other men!" Plenty of women have gone through an abusive relationship before entering a much healthier one with another man. Fictional women aren't any different. "How can you look at her and believe she's attracted to men?" Stop stereotyping. A female character being gnc doesn't mean she's not attracted to men. "She hates men!" Most of the time when this is said, it's either haters projecting or a line or a scene taken out of context. Or both. Leave other shippers alone. It's not that hard.

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There is some sweet and REALLY annoying irony in how the moment a fictional woman is revealed to bi, she takes a complete nosedive in the shipping department. Irony only gets deeper when many of her fans who insist she must never as much as be even seen around a male character (because as we all know, that's what bi means, right?) in both fan and canon content act soo surprised by her sudden lack of fandom popularity as of late. My friends kicked out by the manager, YOU caused this on yourselves. Viewing a female character as incapable of being a popular character and one that is attracted to men at the same time is never going to be the win you think it is. Not even just in the context of bi female characters & biphobia. Female characters in general who are attracted to men in canon being seen by a fanbase as only worth attention and popularity when you ignore that attraction is not a win either.

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If you want to talk about how a fanbase feels about a fictional woman, you need to stop acting like it's exclusively men who have ever (irrationally) hated any female characters. Erasing certain fans who create discourse does more harm than good.

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If you want animation to stop being seen as lesser by audiences and the larger entertainment industry or regarded as "just for (dumb) kids" like many celebrities or famous people have condescendingly said in the past, you have to stop acting sooo surprised when animation does many wondrous things in both the animated and writing department just because most of it is for kids. "I can't believe this cartoon for children tackles so many serious issues in such a well-written way for children! Did I also mention it's a cartoon for children?!" Yes. Because children aren't idiots. And just because something is for kids does not imply the overall quality, nor does it imply being bad or lesser by definition. Your welcome to be surprised when something animated surpasses many expectations, but saying or implying it would be more possible if it wasn't for kids is rarely needed. "Animation can't be worthwhile or worth real respect! It's for kids Lol!" is just as annoying as "It's amazing how this animated movie for children is so well written despite being written for children." If you want animation to earn more respect and stop being seen as a lesser children's thing, you need to let go of this stance.

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It's amusing how much of the same people who go on and on about how other fans can't handle "complex" female characters, not only actively act like there are ZERO pre-existing examples of said characters, also tend to have some very dumb reasons for not handling them either. "THEY RUINED (INSERT FICTIONAL WOMAN HERE)!" "Oh no! What happened? Did they forget all of her character development? Was she reduced down to a stereotype? Down to a bunch of tropes? Is she losing character agency as the plot goes on? Don't tell me she's blatantly being set up for a badly written death!" "It's worse than that! They're... giving her a male love interest*! How dare they give strong female character a (male) love interest!" *It's even more frustrating when she's just shown to have a crush or just finds a (male) character attractive, and fans still get worked up. Or other fans aren't allowed to ship her with male characters in non-canon works for very stereotypical and annoying reasons, such as being a "strong female character."

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Unpopular Opinion: It's pointless for to go on and on about bi men having a supposed "queer" taste in women, if you're going to not stand by that and then turn around, and praise straight men with a "queer" taste in women, acting like they're the only ones like that. No surprise, more bi men don't come out with all this dismissal and erasure. Which is not only hurtful towards bi men. You all complain and stereotype about how straight men in general lack any real preferences (in both fictional & real women) outside of societal beauty standards that the moment you come across men who are different in this regard, you think it's smart to act like only a select few are like this while others are straight-up liars worth stereotyping. For example: "Why can't more men be like (insert male celebrity/internet celebrity here)?" Or "Only this (insert male celebrity/internet celebrity here) has a 'queer' taste in women." Plenty are. You all just hate seeing your stereotypes not be as widespread as you think. Another example: "Why can't more men be like (insert male character here) when it comes to women?!" This also does nothing for questioning men. E.g. you don't need to be bi to find gnc people of the same gender attractive. Reinforcing stereotypes, one stereotype at a time.

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I fail to see what's oh-so-evil when someone points out how a fanbase loves a bi female character points out how fans are NEVER (oe rarely) allowed to ship her with male characters. Or if she never displays any attraction towards male characters and they want to keep that way. In both canon and fanworks, unless it's laced with contempt. And honestly? If it turns out there's more bi female characters, this happens to than male characters? By all means, bring it up and give the problem more attention. "I respect this (bi) female character unless no one acknowledges her attraction towards men," will never be a smart take.

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"This fictional woman is a 'strong female character' because we remind the audience that she's better than the male characters and all those icky men, every second!" is A LOT more prevalent than everyone who stubbornly believes most writers these days have flawed male characters peacefully coexist with flawless fictional women, with some kind of invisible barrier between the two. And I'm tired of fandoms acting like that's not the case. Male fans shouldn't have to put up with all these depictions that are poorly disguised insults and caricatures, especially when written by women who try to hide their bad writing under something that's not even that deep. It's just their contempt for others, in this men. And more fandom women should stop viewing flaws in a fictional woman as some kind of insult towards them. Otherwise, you're not gonna see many good female characters anytime soon, like you used to.

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It's really bonkers hearing a fandom claim: "More would ship this if it was between a male character and a female character!" When most fandoms make it pretty clear, they only care for certain ship dynamics when it's between two fictional men or two fictional women. Anytime it's not, it's all "problematic" or some other nonsense. Made even weirder when it's a popular pairing to begin with.

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"Gays are the only ones with good taste in m/f ships!" Those same "Gays": Why are these bisexual characters being shipped by other fans with characters of the opposite gender??? Bi erasure is not just from the biphobic straight fans.

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There's something amusing in watching fanbases prop up certain characters that are also given more attention by the creators that they and the creators get sooooo surprised when said character is the one keeping that attention, winning awards related to said character in award shows. Or other big things. If you didn't want them to be this popular, why did you give them said popularity? You put them on the same pedestal you claimed you never wanted them on. There's a cause & effect on all actions.

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"I CANNOT BELIEVE THE BIGOTRY THAT IS ALIVE AND WELL IN FANDOMS TODAY! ESPECIALLY FOR CANON!" ... All I said was I don't ship Sam & Frodo? You're always going to meet fans who don't ship the same things as you. Difference of opinion is everywhere.

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Love to one day come across a tumblr blog run by a bisexual here that doesn't go on and on about all men are worthless and deserve to die. And then some of them have the audacity to be so surprised more bisexuals aren't coming out.

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There really needs to be a term (unless there already is one) for when an older male character is close to and looks out for a younger one, but calling it a father son dynamic is a bit of a stretch to some fans who want to purely view it as a close friendship. Especially if the younger character still has a good (alive) dad. And when the older of the two realizes/remembers what it means to be a parent. Or wants to be one.

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Nothing screams apathy harder than everyone who goes, "ARE THE STRAIGHTS OKAY!?" everytime a post about a woman mistreating a man rolls around. It's even more annoying when it's a post that actually puts the man in a sympathetic light, and yet there are still those comments being made. Yet the opposite is often treated as no laughing matter. Double standards, am I right? Made only worse by the same people saying it's men's own fault that they're not believed to be victims of abuse or rape. Also. Way to erase abuse victims of same-sex relationships. Yes, there are examples of posts of fictional relationships where this happens (because we all know how fiction usually tackles women on men abuse), but this is about real people. Tackling the issue in real life will most likely lead to less of it happening in fiction.

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While I sincerely doubt there is a shortage of well-written m/f pairings in media, in regards to many badly written ones, I can't help but feel as though a big problem with the way they're written is right there yet it continues to be ignored. Whether purposefully or just naively. That problem? Most audiences and writers don't ask how men feel about said m/f pairings. Men are just written off as either being why the pairing sucks, not knowing what makes a good one and/or not the ones to turn to because they're men. Even though it's a pairing between a man & a woman. This also sucks because men are rarely given the chance to voice how they feel about how male characters are depicted in m/f pairings. Just put up and be silent, especially around all the "fictional men are better than real ones!" claims. If you're gonna let women voice their critiques, you might as well let it go both ways. Which is most likely also why female characters mistreating male characters get ignored or swept under the rug. They're a part of audiences and fandoms as well. Excluding them goes against the idea that fandoms are inclusive of everyone.

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I'm sure it's been said before, but it's just odd to me when a fanbase insists more fans would ship (insert same-sex pairing here) if one of them was the opposite gender. Which is rarely ever true when a fanbase (these days) makes it pretty clear they only care for certain relationship dynamics if it's between two men or two women. "Enemies to Lovers only works if it's between two women! Women can't hurt each other like how men hurt women!" "More would ship this if it was a straight pairing!" The pairing: (a shonen rivalry between two male characters) Yeah, that isn't happening. But as I said before, it is certain ship dynamics. The fans who make this assumption usually don't point towards the ones where more or the same amount of shippers would ship it. And it gets annoying when said pairing is already very popular inside a fanbase, yet the shippers not only can't accept when they're wrong about this assumption but can't accept only like roughly 30% of a fanbase not shipping it. Differences of opinion will always happen. That's part of being in fanbase.

March 2024:

I'm never going to take any fan who refuses to acknowledge or believe there are any women who hates female characters, seriously. You can't want to change how a fandom feels about a female character and purposefully ignore half of the fanbase.

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I never really cared much for the trope to begin with, but I just LOVE how "himbos" has lost all meaning in the last few years in a fandom. And boy is it annoying watching a fanbase still try to cling to it. At first, it was fans (mainly women) romanticizing about male characters who are simultaneously the dumbest, kindest, and most muscular men fiction had to offer. And, for some reason, that's what a woman should be encouraged to look for in real-life men as well. Because a man with a brain is a red flag, for some reason. Anyways, it wasn't bad in some cases. It just got WORSE when a fanbase insisted that it's the only kind of male characters to write. So, of course, fans started to call every male character they like a himbo, not caring about the fact many examples didn't meet the all criteria, making the term lose all meaning. As long as it was a kind male character they liked, than they just went with it and straight to stereotyping. "My favorite ship dynamic is girlboss x himbo!" The himbo they're referring to: *a kind unathletic male character of average intelligence* Which is horrible, considering how many smart male characters are made dumb in fandom content just to appease these fantasies. Taking canon characters and flanderizing them should never be encouraged. And even funnier when they question the lack of "himbo women" in fiction. How about not turning every fictional woman, uber compentent, and absent of flaws?

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Canon: This character's trauma is valid and not hard to see why they snapped. It still DOESN'T mean they're allowed to hurt whomever they want, especially innocents who had NOTHING to do with it. Pay attention to how some characters may lose sight of what really mattered and became as evil (or worse) as those who hurt them. Most Fandoms: Problematic. Cancel the story right now. They did nothing wrong. This is now the worst writing in existence. Trauma means everything they do now was right and justified. Whose to say every innocent person they harmed was REALLY innocent? How dare the writers victim blame!

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One of the weirdest and most backward things I've encountered about shipping is the number of shippers that just utterly HATE when certain ship dynamics or clichés are not only written one way. You can only write enemies to lovers when it's two men or two women. You can only write enemies to lovers if it's two characters who argue. You can only write friends to lovers if it's two men or two women, or not at all, otherwise you're romanticizing incest. You can only write a ship between a male character and a female character if the former is madly in love with the latter; the opposite or mutual is erasing a woman's agency. You can only write a "strong female character" if she never falls in love because love is a weakness for her. I can't relate to any fan or shipper who thinks that way. Especially with the number of potentially interesting stories and/or pairings that get erased because a fanbase is too caught up in playing it safe. Yet, you can argue that a lot of these examples aren't even playing it unsafe. The fanbase needs to change.

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I know fans are welcome to ship whatever they want but oh my god, it is so disappointing when a women in canon is attracted to men and next to NO ONE in the fandom wants to explore that in fanon or any fan works. A fictional woman is a "strong female character" until fans even just acknowledge she's attracted to men. Her attraction to men is seen as lesser and an antithesis towards being a strong character. Love is a weakness, in many contexts in their eyes. A bi woman is so loved by a fanbase that most of those fans will tell others to NEVER ship her with any of the male characters. Apparently, being bi means not being attracted towards men. Because a woman was abused by a man in canon, that means her attraction towards men goes poof and no one is allowed to put her within 5 feet of a man. Even though loads of abused women in real life say otherwise. And let's not forget when a fictional woman being attracted to men is seen as "romanticizing abuse" on the basis of being attracted to men.

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I'm still amazed by the fact I have to say, "If you want a fictional bi woman to become popular in a fanbase, you have to accept there will be fans who ship her with men," to entire fanbases. "But she has no chemistry with any of the men!" That's just your opinion. "But shipping her with men is romanticizing/normalizing abuse!" Go outside. "But the icky men get in the way of my cute wlw ship uwu!" None. Of. This. Is. Canon.

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It's really annoying in Fandom where people get mad at others for shipping a confirm Bi Character with a character of the opposite sex in the show, especially weird when its implied the bi m/f will not canon, its just a ship people know won't be canon but just like the ship.

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Fandom: "We support our Bi Kings and Queens in canon!!!" Fandom *People start shipping Bi characters in m/f ships* Fandom: "No!! why are shipping them together!"

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It's amazing (and very annoying) how many women in fiction from a few years or even decades ago would be viewed as "repressed lesbians" if the stories they starred in came out today. As opposed to audiences respecting the source material and stop viewing all the headcanons and non-canon shipping they do as canon. Or accusing writers who don't deserve it of being bigots. It's not a good thing that this is the case. It just goes to show how many people are chill with stereotypes when they're the ones doing it.

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There's some hilarious irony in watching the same people who go on about "normalizing gnc," throwing hands the moment they see anyone who is gnc is in a relationship with the opposite gender. In regards to both real people and fictional characters. Always halting the progress before it begins.

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"I can't believe the amount of sympathy the fanbase had for this character dropped, all because they attacked (or worse) whomever they wanted!" Good. A character's trauma can never be an excuse to hurt innocent people who had nothing to do with it.

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It's amazing when a bi woman is not ashamed of her attraction towards men in canon and maybe even open about said attraction, yet fanbases ignore it at every turn. Because most fandoms and most people in general can't conceptualize a bi woman not going on about how much she hates men or feels ashamed or wishes she wasn't or just makes fun of being attracted towards men; fans love to ignore that she is none of those things. And man, does all of this show in shipping circles. As seen in fanart and fanfics that make it looks like she hates being attracted towards men and ignores canon like the plague. Clearly, fanon is better (it's not). Or worse. They take a scene or line out of context to prove she is bi and hates men. Just be more accepting of it. It's not hard at all.

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People SERIOUSLY need to stop asking for Bi representation for a character if they’re just going to get mad when said character is in a relationship (or just shipped in general) with the opposite gender. Like, do you guys KNOW what Bisexuality means??? It’s not watered-down Homosexuality, it’s just as valid.

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"Misandry doesn't exist" What realm do you live in?

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It's interesting watching the same fans who call every fictional adult woman with breasts "sexualization!" based on just having them. Often calling for them to be flat chested immediately, when many of them will yell, "child-coded!" on the basis of that. And no doubt already have for pre-existing female characters.

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"I can't believe the audience preferred the flawed male character(s) OVER the perfect female character(s) who we blocked criticism of at every turn!" And? What else were you actually expecting? It's basic logic at play.

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"Why aren't there more women in fiction who snapped and became evil after losing the man they loved deeply and adored?" Y'all can barely handle when a woman is a "strong woman" and loves the male love interest she is with, often viewing it as her "losing all agency by the writers" or "she can't be a strong woman and with a man" on the basis of such. Is it any surprise that something this complex is avoided by writers, when fans get this unnecessarily worked up over something this simple? It should come as no surprise something as deep as this is avoided. Especially considering how much hate a fictional man gets for daring to be with a fictional woman and, considering how many hate the simple idea alone of her caring this much about a man. "WHY does she care so much for HIM!? HE'S A MAN!" I wish more or anyone would tackle this concept for a female antagonist as well, but some introspection is worth looking at. And biases that need to end now.

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I don't see why one should take discussions about "sexualization," of female characters seriously when the majority of those involved call flatchested (and/or short) women in fiction "pedophilia" or "child-coded" and simultaneously assume the creators are pervs. Made humorous when it's a woman doing the supposed "sexualization" and they still assume it's men, staying in denial. It really is blown out of proportion in many cases.

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"I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS FANBASE ERASED THESE TWO BI WOMEN AS LESBIANS JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE WITH EACH OTHER! Bi erasure is horrible to see a fanbase embrace!" "Have you tried not erasing their attraction towards men? Or leaving fanfics that ship them with male characters alone? And stop acting like they either hate men, when they don't, or they're only good characters if they hate on men?" "NEVER! ALL MEN DESERVE TO DIE!" Seriously. Y'all want to avoid bi erasure so badly yet contribute to it yourselves and act so surprised that you are. Or are you well aware of this and want to end bi erasure but draw the line at liking men. No wonder a fictional woman takes a nosedive in terms of shipping the moment she's revealed to be bi.

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It's amazing how next to NO ONE actually stands by the stereotype of "you need to be bi to find (fictional) gnc men and/or (fictional) gnc women hot!" in execution. Only in theory. And yes. That stereotype does more harm than good. As most of them do. You don't need to be bi to find those kinds of people (or characters) attractive. There are plenty of straight women (for example) who find feminine men attractive. That's rarely ever a statement on their sexuality; only a statement if a lot of them realize they are attracted to women as well. It is interesting how, once again, most only stand by this in theory. Most of the time, they won't even assume bisexuality of other people while still stereotyping. E.g., "You need to be bi to find (insert character here) attractive!" (Later) "... Why do so many men find her attractive??? Can't they look at her and tell she's not for dumb straights!" Or assuming only certain men find gnc women attractive (and vice versa), and all of them in general are just creeps or fetishizers. It's really not hard to understand. Straight men are attracted to women. Straight women are attracted to men. It REALLY isn't hard to understand. And don't misunderstand me. This does hurt bisexuals because it's such a boxed in and stereotypical view. For example, a bi woman being with a man (or the opposite) who looks like an average person shouldn't receive so much anger. This is anything but progressive, and it's very telling how many so-called "progressives" believe it to be.

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Nothing is more telling than when a fanbase assumes a character is a victim of assault based on how "conventionally" attractive they are or aren't. Or when a character is in canon, but biases such as those prevent most fans from viewing it as canon. This is almost as bad as a character's gender affecting that stubborn view ("How is this character a victim? HE'S A MAN!")

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There's nothing like watching a bunch of people who aren't bi call actual bisexuals "straight" and spread biphobia onto them for the most petty reasons. (Not any better when it's other bisexuals by the way) Yes, there are bisexuals who don't need to headcanon the male and female characters in a pairing as bi in order to like said pairing. Yes, there are bisexuals who ship bi characters with characters of the opposite gender. Yes, there are bisexuals who are accepting of bi female characters and don't erase her attraction towards male characters. Yes, there are bisexuals who find (insert character here) attractive. Yes, even THAT character. Yes, there are bisexuals who headcanon THAT character as bi and enjoy the wide array of characters to ship them with. Both male and female. Yes, even the ones commonly headcanoned as gay. None of this deserves biphobia. Please be more mindful and nuanced of others.

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"I miss when there was no drama, no discourse, no ship wars, no morality contests and nothing negative going on in fandoms." Me, a Fandom Dinosaur: ... There was always negativity like this. It just got worse in certain areas when it shouldn't have. And as much as I hate to say it, ship wars are always going to be a thing because shippers exist in basically every fanbase, and not each of them avoid discourse. Some start it. Fandoms in recent years just felt the need to tag more "moral indicators" onto it for no reason and/or just made them more apparent and known to all fans (e.g., "If you ship this! You hate female abuse victims/all women!") There's nothing wrong with wishing things were better, but acting like there was never anything wrong forgets how long a lot of this has been around for and needs to end by now.

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When people only want to make a character “Bi” so they can be attracted to the same gender and then call YOU Homophobic when you ship them with the opposite gender. This is mostly annoying when said character is possibly Straight, because it seems like they’re just using Bisexaulity as a tool to have their precious gay ship and deem any wlm ship as “siblings”. These are the same people who will claim that “Bisexuality is just watered down Homosexuality”. How Biphobia/Bi-erasure can you get??? Doing shit like this, you’re is just making Bisexuality more invalid, which is terrible.

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"It is homophobia when male celebrities are disgusted over being shipped together and the fans are the ones being told to stop all their gross fantasies around their friendships! As celebrity men aren't allowed to say anything unless they want to be labeled as homophobes. And it's a good thing that we do call them that!" Go. Out. Side. Touch. Some. Grass. These are real life people you're being gross around. Save this for the characters they may play but please don't view that as "ship fuel" for what relationships they have outside of this.

April 2024:

It's possible to enjoy a close canon friendship between two characters and leave the fans who ship them alone. For example, for every "close m/f friendship," you love, there always will be fans who ship them, and just because you don't, doesn't mean they're not allowed to. There's no need to insist that no one can ship them or shout something unnecessary like, "Only boring people ship this!" Or "Why can't fans let men & women be friends!" (Way to nitpick) Differences of opinion should be embraced in a fandom.

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Me, joining Tumblr for the first time: Wow! So many fellow bisexuals! (5 minutes later) And they won't stop talking about how much they hate men, and the world is better off without them. Facing no consequences. Great (sarcasm). At least they're not surprised more aren't coming out while doing this... ... (further sarcasm)

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There is nothing more telling when the same fans who call a series, "so bad, it's good!" When it is legimately well-written and they actively ignore that for the most fussy reasosn. Even more when they are also (toxic) shippers. You'll lie about a work of fiction just because your ship isn't canon? Go outside.

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"Fandoms are meant to be escapist!" - Says the same blog that says all art is political regardless of how much people say it isn't.

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I love how all the "representation" in the last 10 or so years in media has just encouraged more people to watch older media and/or media from their childhood. Bad writing is bad writing, and no amount of "WE HAVE REPRESENTATION!" Is going to erase that. Which is funnier when older media has "representation" and so many people act like they didn't. They just understood better writing and not making it such a big deal. Or they acknowledge it to prop up something from today that either doesn't get it or defend the bad writing of another series. There's more "representation" and good writing in a season of Rugrats than most TV shows in the last few years.

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I'm just gonna say it out loud. If you want a fanbase to treat more fictional women with the same level of "shippability" as some of the male characters, you have to leave other fans be. And stop hating the simple idea of a female character who doesn't hate being attracted to men. Or acting like other fans shouldn't ship her with men. Yes, those fans won't always be the same person (some ship her with men, some with other women, some both, you get the idea), but I'm talking about the fandoms at large. No, it is not "romanticizing abuse" towards women when a female character is given a male love interest. No, a "strong female character" is not less of one for having a male love interest. No, a fan doesn't think less of her for shipping her with a man. That alone is not evidence. No, she doesn't lack chemistry with the male characters. That's subjective; also, fanfic writers often do more with them and often better. In addition, OCs exist. Even if the "all male characters have no chemistry with her (and/or are badly written)," was true, original male characters exist. You shouldn't judge OCs based on canon characters who fanfic writers did not make. If you want more fandoms to embrace the cringe (affectionate) of xOC pairings, that also applies to canon female characters x male ocs. All of this also applies to bi female characters. Yes, that means accepting if they don't hate being attracted to men in canon. Yes, that means accepting the fact that some fans do ship them with men. What do you think bi means? Yes, that means Many times, fans claim to "protect" a female character when they're clearly doing the opposite. And hurting many fans in the process.

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A character being mean doesn't instantly translate to being morally gray. It's not always an indicator of their morals. Oftentimes, just a part of who they are.

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Bisexual blog: *exists* Me, who is also bi: "Cool! I can't wait to see it mys-" That same blog: *keeps going on about how all men must die like it's a good thing, wishes death on all men, says being attracted to men is disgusting and horrible, makes rude & biphobic comments about anyone who isn't ashamed to be attracted to men, says being bisexual is "half-failed" when attracted to men; "half-success" when attracted to women* Also, that same blog: *claims to be accepting of all bisexuals here and still spreads positivity* Me: "Don't know what I was expecting. This isn't the first blog where this has happened. And they wonder why so many stay in the closet..."

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"We need more bi characters because they help more bisexuals to come out! Representation matters!" They scream before treating real people as fictional characters and fictional characters as real people. Bullying all around and forcing more to stay in the closet. "Why is this bisexual character being shipped with the opposite gender? Damn straights." "Why are you shipping this bi female character with men?! ONLY DUMB STRAIGHTS DO THAT!" "I don't trust fans who ship (insert bisexual character here) with characters of the opposite gender! They must be straight!" And many more.

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Full offense, but as someone who is bi, I can't stand the insistence that every "good" ship between a male and female character needs to be headcanoned as bi in order for you to like it. You are not going to die liking a pairing between two straight characters. Especially when much of the same fans who do this have such a stingy relationship with canon bi characters. No, it is not romanticizing abuse towards women when some fans ship a bi female character with a male character. Also, how hypocritical. You will headcanon every pairing between a male and female character as being two bisexuals in disguise, all because you see being straight as something inherently toxic, but fans aren't allowed to ship canon bi characters with anyone they want? The insecurity speaks for itself.

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Calling enemies-to-lovers "romanticizing abuse" makes about as much sense as calling friends-to-lovers "romanticizing incest" and it's time fandoms start to retire those retorts. It's been around for WAY too long.

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I hate how normalized and casual it is to treat the men in fandoms like crap. "Men are not allowed to like (insert series here)!" "Only men ship this horrible m/f pairing!" "Men are not allowed to draw (insert fictional woman here)! Only women can like her!" "Men are not allowed to like (fictional woman here)!" "All male shippers do is imagine themselves as the men in m/f pairings to take advantage of (insert fictional woman here)!" "FORBID MEN FROM DRAWING (fanart)!" "BAN MEN FROM WRITING (fanfiction)!" "Keep this fandom men free!" "This male character is better than every man alive!" "All male fans are incel, neo-nazi, overweight, neckbeard, perverted manbabies!" "Why are other women coming to the defense of male fans? THEY'RE MEN!" And no doubt many more. Fandoms should be accepting of everyone, and that means everyone.

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I love how it's always, "respect all female characters!" Until it's one, a fanbase can't project their hatred of men onto.

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"If this show was made today, the evil side would condemn it for being too woke!" And you all would call all the flatchested female characters "children-coded" and accuse the creators of being perverts. Or accuse the creators of "romanticizing abuse towards women" because they gave a female character a male love interest. Or accuse other fans of being pedophiles because they ship a pairing you don't like. Whichever comes first. :)

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I hate when a fictional woman is given many options of both male and female characters to ship her with, but the fanbase can't help but reduce all the male characters to boring and uninteresting options for her that only the dullest of people ship her with male characters, (Or worse; assume abuse is wished on her, just on the basis of fans shipping her with male characters) And then the fans who do this discourse have the audacity to question why she's so untouched in the world of shipping and overall ship content. Stop projecting for one minute.

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Just because you view every pair of male and female characters as siblings does NOT mean no one is allowed to ship them, nor are the fans "romanticizing" incest. A difference of opinion should always be embraced in a fanbase. No matter how hard you try, it's going to be there.

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It's funny to me how watered down to nonsense some things are in a fandom, because so many fans lack nuance and expect to be praised for the lack of such. "THIS EVIL MALE CHARACTER IS A RAGING SEXIST!" The male character in question: *teases both men and women they are friends with* Which is funnier when the opposite is seen praiseworthy and "let's welcome our man-hating queen!" just because fans purposefully don't get a woman playfully teasing her male friends. Funniest when the fans who do this get so shocked if she ends with a man down the line. Your only evidence was misinterpreting teasing and banter? Weak.

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I hate it whenever there's a post on Tumblr about men being able to defend themselves from abusive women, the notes either feel the need to make it gender neutral (where's that when posts purposefully stereotype abuse as purely man on woman? Double standards), defend the women who mistreat innocent men, or say neither side should be hitting one another. In regard to the last one, first off, stay on topic. It's hit "back" for a reason. And you know that. Stop being ignorant. Secondly, I love how no one treats abusive men the same. They see them as unreasonable abusers who won't listen to words and need to be dealt with immediately. While abusive women are so complex and just need to be talked to in order to stop. I'm sure they didn't mean it! Thanks for the double standards. I know who not to call when a man is abused by a woman. Third, stop defending abusive women. Men have every right to defend themselves as much as every other abuse victim.

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One of the most interesting (yet often annoying) things to see happen in a fanbase is assumptions on how a character reacts to crushes on them. Two things: most crushes are one-sided, AND it's not always a universal indication of a character's sexuality. Maybe a male character rejects a female character because he is attracted to men, OR they are attracted to women; this one they are either not into, only see as a friend, or has little regard for their personal space and/or can't take no for answer. Opposite is also true. Yes, this fictional woman fell for another male character after rejecting one they're not into; pay attention to why. Don't even get me started on all the bi erasure that comes with all this assuming. Most fans either assume gay or straight. Nothing else. No, this canon bi woman (for example) rejecting 1 male character doesn't mean they're bi and hate men or gay and hate men; they're not attracted to this one in particular. Not every character who rejects a character of the opposite gender is telling the audience they're not straight. Many times, they just don't share the same feelings as another character, who just so happens to be of the opposite gender.

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"None of the anti m/f shipping discourse hate on the male characters in those pairings!" Y'all assume the writers are romanticizing abuse towards women, just for giving a (strong) fictional woman a male love interest. Or the creators, who are male, are clearly projecting onto the men in these pairings. Or the male fans who are fans of these pairings just have some gross "power fantasy" with the women in them, over genuinely liking said pairings. Or go on about how the women in these pairings "deserve better" than this. Or just hate certain male characters on sight. Only confronting half the problem helps no one.

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I really can't stand how bisexuals (both real AND fictional) are treated as some kind of political stance to support very flawed and idiotic views. "ALL BISEXUALS are sexually attracted to men, so men (who DO NOT deserve it) know what it feels like to have evil sexual attraction towards them! AND romantically attracted to women because they're the fairer sex who don't feel evil sexual attraction and are the only ones who experience romance!" Way to keep more people in the closet by being this boxed in.

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A fandom's inability to acknowledge all the women in it who hate certain female characters is just plain stupid. And will only halt them from being more popular. Assuming all the women in a fanbase loves each female character on the basis of just being a woman, erases all the haters. If you want a character to be popular in a fanbase, you have to call out all haters. Both the men AND women. And differentiate between the haters and fans who just don't like them. Not everyone who doesn't like them is a hater or a raging sexist. It's just their opinion.

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"Everyone who has ever asked why two characters can't stay friends, are CLEARLY homophobes!" My sister kicked into Hell, you look at every pairing between a male and female character asking why they can't stay friends, while praising those same tropes put on same sex pairings. This isn't a bigoted problem. It's a difference of opinion from fans that certain fans don't want to accept, often out of ego.

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It's amazing how simple the lesson of "this character's trauma is not an excuse for them to hurt whomever they want; especially innocents who had nothing to do with said trauma," is so despised by audiences these days. This is what separates the "heroes" from the actual heroes in a work of fiction. Yes. A character is not a "hero" if they hurt whomever they please, as opposed to those who wronged them, and view it as justified. What else were you expecting?

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I hate when bisexuals are treated as some kind of unarguable or "you must agree with this, or else!" view in fandoms. "All bisexuals only feel sexual attraction towards male characters and men! Now, men know what it feels like! No man alive provides romantic relationships!" "All bisexuals only feel romantic attraction towards women and female characters! Women are the pure, fairer sex! Everyone who feels sexual attraction towards women is a damn freak! No one finds 'sexy' women in fiction attractive!" It's funny how much of this same stance comes from the same people who call fictional women "child-coded" on very empty reasons.

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Just because a problem in a fanbase got worse as of late, does not mean it came out of thin air. For example; shippers who believe shipping will lead to their ship being canon. And getting angry when it does not. This has been around for awhile. It's just dragged in more toxicity in recent years. And questionable viewpoints ("You can't ship them with Character B! It romanticizes abuse! The ship with Character A is the healthier pairing!"). It's important to know how old a lot of these problems are.

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When a bi female character has a wide selection of both men and women to ship her with; I hate when the fanbase decides all the male characters you can ship her with are all the "boring" or "lukewarm" or "only lame straights ship her with men" ones. Or her attraction towards men is seen as lesser and "it doesn't count" in the eyes of an entire fandom. Or giving her a male love interest is seen as "romanticizing abuse" by these same fans. And then the fanbase has the audacity to question why she's barely used in shipping while doing all of this.

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Everyone hates corporations until some of them make a huge "men bad" comment. How easily swayed a lot of you are.

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"I can't believe more bisexuals won't come out!" - Said the same Tumblr Blogs who won't stop talking about how horrible and disgusting it is to be bisexual and attracted to men. "No bisexual is actually, happily attracted to yucky men! If they are, something is wrong with them!" You are the ones keeping more in the closet.

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It's astounding how many fandoms get so angry seeing the ship of bi female characters often involve shipping them with male characters. Like, yeah? What else were you expecting? If you want fictional bi women to be popular in fandoms, that means letting fans actually embrace the "bi" part of them. You can't say, "I want (insert bi female characters here) to be used more by fans!" And then get worked up that some of them put them with male and female characters. Also, don't act so surprised or mad if these fandoms avoid as much as looking at her or others. You forced fans into not wanting to touch them unless they abide by strict guidelines, or else. Putting limits on other fans will only limit fancontent and thus, how often you'll see her in said fancontent. Shipping bi characters gets enough toxicity as is. Avoiding this should be necessary.

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The amount of FEAR a fanbase has for a strong woman potentially ending up with a man is just plain pathetic. Made even more pathetic when shippers are afraid to ship her with male characters due to how widespread the negativity is. "You can't be a strong female character and have a male love interest!" Go. Outside. Love is not a weakness.

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"Finding a female character hot means you DO NOT respect her as a character! You can't admire her as a well-written character AND find her physically attractive!" Go Outside.

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"It's so EVIL when you KNOW a character is BISEXUAL but the writers don't!" "Does that mean the fanbase is gonna leave fans who ship them with characters of the opposite gender alone?" "NEVER!"

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It's amazing how many fandoms answer their own questions, yet remain so unnecessarily confused like the answer isn't right before them. "This character/show was made for bisexuals!" A few seconds later. "WHY ARE MEN HERE!?!" Take a wild guess.

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"Back in my day, we NEVER shipped with the hopes our ships became canon, and we NEVER got any ship wars." I hate to break to you, but this was always a thing. Ship wars did not just pop into thin air a few years ago, and doing so erases how long this has been an issue.

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Would be nice to have more kind male characters in modern media who aren't also dumb idiots.

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While there's nothing fundamentally wrong with having this kind of headcanon, it really grinds my gears when the majority headcanon in a fandom between two unrelated grown ass adult men is a father/son relationship, just because one is a mentor to or just older than the other. It especially grinds my gears when I'm considered "weird" for enjoying them as a ship.

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I find it very frustrating in one of the fandoms I'm in how there are people who are like "it's ridiculous that there are people who think these two male characters have a father/son or master/student relationship, the way they interact and speak to each other is not how people in the culture the series is from would behave if they had that relationship' like I'm from that culture and they are absolutly right, in my culture you would not speak so casually to a parental or teacher figure. however the thing that bothers me is that most of the people bringing it up insist that since they relationship can't be father/son or student/teacher, then obviously the only option is lovers. And they act like anyone who thinks the relationship could be platonic is a total idiot and disrespecting the culture. But the thing is that while yes, the way the characters address each other is a way that lovers might, it's also a way close friends or siblings might. There are multiple options for what their relationship is besides father/son and student/teacher that could be the case. But they totally disregard that and treat people horribly for not bending over and agreeing that their ship being canon is the only possible option. Like can you not fucking ship your ship without trying to stop other people from interpreting things differently

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A lot of fandoms these days are full of fans who are under the impression that there is clearly "something wrong" with other fans who wishes there was less "politics" in media and most media these days focused more on quality over politics being brought up. When they are the ones who are in the wrong. First off, most turn to fiction for escapism. They rarely want to connect what they're doing for fun to current events in the world. Secondly, that dates media fast and I mean FAST. Making EVERY. SINGLE. Movie, TV show, cartoon, video game, etc, also be about the current politics and events in the world is gonna leave audiences with less reason to care about it years later, when those same current events become a thing of the past. Thirdly, no. Just no. The examples you bring up of older media pulling off "political" themes in fiction were most likely not entirely political to begin with. Or political at all. And even if some of them were, as I'm sure many examples have crossed your mind by now, that was less of the focus and more focus on the themes themselves. Plus, they most likely wrote it with more talent than most writers these days, who are waiting on fans to defend it for reasons that have little or anything to do with writing quality. In addition, that LIMITS the kinds of stories writers are trying to tell to audiences and fans. "Freedom" for example, cannot be a purely a political theme when writers can do so much more with it. Lastly, all of this applies to fandoms. If the fans don't want to talk about politics 24/7 with people who make wrongful assumptions about others and focus elsewhere: Good. For. Them.

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I really can't stand when the "we need fiction to teach important lessons" is made biased and selective by fans. "I hate how they removed this one male character being sexist for 3 episodes because we need to teach little boys that they're all born fat, misogynistic, rapist, incels who deserve to die and can retain some decency!" "Are you gonna recognize the importance of the same lesson when writers say it's wrong for a woman to hate every single man? It can go both ways." "NEVER!"

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"This male character barely, if ever CRIES at ALL! THAT MEANS! HE'S A HEARTLESS JERK and MUCH more evil than the antagonist(s)! AND the writers are CLEARLY saying men aren't allowed to cry!" The male character in question: *kind, looks out his friends and loved ones, compassionate, enjoys making other people happy, sympathetic for others who have been hurt and still expresses a wide range of emotions* As it turns out, crying is NOT the only way to express one's emotions and writing off characters, male in this case, as being a heartless person for the lack of it is ridiculous. I hope no one who does, this treats the real-life men their friends with like this. This mentality is too close-minded for its own good.

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Common pet peeve; fans calling something plot armour when it isn't.

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May 2024:

One of the problems with, "bring back [more] canon x OC!" is not tackling how many fandoms live in pure FEAR of other fans shipping canon female characters with male OCs. Made more frustrating when some of the canon female characters in question are bi. If you rightfully hate the opposite, this shouldn't get a free pass. You can't want certain characters to be used more in fancontent and not stand by that want.

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It's pointless to go around saying, "Fandoms are a safe space for everyone!" if you're going turn to around and write off all the male fans as a bunch of degenerates.

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The worse piece of "criticism" for "The Simpsons," is how it's "so great" that Lisa went from feeling like an actual kid in older episodes, to just being a mouthpiece for whatever the current issue in the world is. And that piece of "criticism" should be taken into account for anyone who writes children characters. Not making them feel like children is bad writing.

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Media illiteracy is astounding, and I hate how well-written stories have stereotypes and projection forced on them, all because the audience can't enjoy what's there and feels the need to replace it.

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I'm not sorry, but I can't vibe with any fans who insist ALL m/f ship dynamics and relationship tropes only work one way and ONE WAY alone. Made more annoying by all the double standards that follow. "This harmless thing is romanticizing abuse towards women!" They scream before shipping it when the dynamic is reversed. How telling. Not only that, but all they're doing is limiting creativity in shipping and character pairings. Both in fan-content and official content.

A woman who is deeply and madly in love the man she's with, can be just as interesting as the opposite.

A woman who wants to burn the world after losing the pure-hearted man she loved can be as intriguing as the opposite.

Pathetic female characters can be potential love interests of male characters, not just the opposite.

A grumpy female character with a kindhearted male character can be as cute as the opposite.

There's bound to be more. And I wish more fandoms understood all of this. And I hope they do.

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There is no bigger slap in the face on Tumblr than coming across a bisexual blog, and it's full of posts about how being attracted to men is horrible, and everyone attracted to them are disgusting.

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It's so odd to me when a fanbase acts like you can't like two characters at the same time, all because of the contrast they share in canon. Or one made by them. e.g., "They're both in-love with the MC (or potential love interests for said MC), how can you be fans of BOTH of them?" Chances are, they have identities and character outside of this. Or some of us are fine with either pairing happening. Or we're multishippers. And fans don't really care either way. Not every fan who likes Character A views that as some kind of intended attack on Character B. This is made even more nonsensical when the contrast between both characters is a major part of both characters. And we as fans are supposed to pay attention to said contrast, since it was written by the writers into them and for us to notice.

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"If these two characters were not of the same gender, you would ship them!" No. I most likely wouldn't. Why? 99% of the time, I ship based on tropes and ship dynamics. Changing the genders of the characters won't erase how "meh," I feel about pairings I don't find too interesting. A boring fictional pairing between a man and a woman is just as boring as a pairing between two men or two women. This is amusing when this same accusation is often made by the same people who refuse to ship certain pairings unless both characters are the same gender. And insist that everyone who doesn't ship the same as them are bigots. No. A lot of the time, fans just like or hate ships regardless. No biases present.

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The hypocrisy of a fanbase to say, "Looks aren't everything!" Then immediately turn around and go on and on about how ugly an unconventionally attractive actor is. With the occasional comment on no one having (insert facial feature here) being an attractive or a good person. With more comments about how no one finds him attractive and everyone who finds him attractive is a gross person.

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"I cannot believe even after everything this male character has done for the woman he's with and madly in love with, the fandom still writes him off as just some jerk!" Because he's a man. Who cares if he has a bunch of positive traits? The fanbase won't care. It doesn't endear him in their eyes. Once a hated male character, always a hated male character. Especially if they would rather see her with a woman and don't see what the issue is in resorting to actively lying about him. Or accepting other fans who do like shipping her with him.

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Not everyone who says "This character deserved better," is talking about them in the context of how they were written. Some are. Some are talking about the life they lived in canon. As we see with tragic characters. Context matters.

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I'm never going to feel bad for fandoms that lack the ability to acknowledge women who hate female characters. You can't keep the attention exclusively on toxic men and be surprised by the lack of progress you play a part in halting. "This female character is a bad role model for young girls!" is often said by fandom women. Amongst others. I fail to see the appeal in letting them off the hook.

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I'm never going to be a fan of the assumption that every straight man is a bi man who is too much of an insecure jerk to come out ("They put themselves in the closet! Those privileged morons!"), hence why we need more representation in media. Or all straight men will come out as bi and become the "safe" group to be around. Focus on good writing, and drop this view.

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I can't stand terfs or radfems as much as the next person, but the assumption a woman needs to be one or become one in order to be a toxic woman (both in and out of fanbases) is downright infantilizing. No one says you need to be in PETA in order to hate animals. This toxicity is based on choice.

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"THIS IS ALL A DUMB POWER FANTASY!" My sister dropkicked in Limbo, anything, and I mean ANYTHING, can be a power fantasy. It's not just a male character having a bunch of women faun over him (or the opposite), it can be anything big or small. Limiting it to purely romantic fantasies limits the term.

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"This conventionally attractive actor is playing a conventionally attractive fictional male character who has a couple of scars. They have a lot of fangirls! THAT MEANS NO MAN ALIVE HAS EVER BEEN BODYSHAMED (by a woman)! And any man who has deserved it! Or those incels are lying! All because this male character exists!" This is a major reason as to why fighting bodyshaming and a lot of "body positivity" have largely failed. A lack of empathy for certain people. And outright dismissal fueled by a lack of logic. In addition to how some people enjoy this level of apathy and power over others. This doesn't diminish individual experiences. This just creates more.

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I can't stand the "All fandoms must be women (and gay men) only!" mentality. Look. It's bad enough that male fans (with little regard for teen ones) are written off as incels and creeps for as much as being in a fanbase, but all the memes and jokes are pointless, and only creates more division. Not only is it antithetical to the idea that fandoms are inherently welcoming of all people, regardless of who they are, but it's present in so many fanbase circles and hurts so many innocent people. All for getting back at those so-called gross men; the nuance is NOT present. As we see with fanartists. "CLEARLY! The artist who drew this is an icky male! No real woman draws like this!" "... I'm the woman who drew this." "LIAR/GET OVER YOUR INTERNALIZED SEXISM!" Or with fictional characters. You're not a clever person for reminding men how disgusting they are for finding a fictional woman attractive. Nor are you funny for making "leaves you for a woman!" jokes about female characters towards male fans. Which is ironic, when a fanbase applies this nonsense to a fictional bi woman. How progressive. Seriously, none of this is acceptable and fandoms don't gain anything from treating the average male fan like $hit. For both all the bigger reasons here and the fact bullying is plain wrong. It will never be justifiable.

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Everyone who acts like the anti-anime sentiment that's been present for many years is not fuelled by sexism in any way, shape or form, is making the issue go for much longer than it needs to be. And chances are, many who do this hate the fact they can't be sexist in peace. Of course most haters who go on about how inherently degenerative all anime and animation from Japan is, feels the need to remind you that it's the fault of men who live there and make those series to begin with. Why would any haters care about the fact they might be racist? They're attacking "icky" men and placing themselves as some kind of moral good, protecting you from them. "We're doing this for the right thing!" And any men who doesn't make a series "like that" (grow. up.) are just rare exceptions. As we see with all the unfunny Miyazaki jokes. This is also present in how most perceive women there who work on and/or create anime. The constant assumption that no woman "would make a series like that," is not as progressive as you think it is and is backwards as heck. In addition, praise them for their talent and not the fact they only made something worthwhile because they are women. It erases the years of talent they put into what they made. And it's not progressive to act like there are only a select few women who are actually good at making an anime, while the others suffer from internalized sexism or are not "real" women. Or secretly gross men in disguise. None of this is proper criticism. Treating women or men as a monolith is never going to be progressive. Once again, to act like it's not fuelled by sexism is ignoring an entire part of the larger problem.

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Whenever a franchise is going to get a new installment or addition that is bound to fail based on many clear bad factors already present, it's amazing how all the creators have to do is just say something "woke" to drag in a bunch of defenders who won't even consume the product to begin with. Or many of those defenders do openly admit to either not being apart of the audience or even a fan to begin with, yet still feel the need to be here and write off all legitimate criticism as bullying of the creators. Like, all you're doing is making things worse and defending something destined to fail. I miss the days when a creator didn't have to fund very questionable charities and/or be exposed as a bigot of some kind, in order to not defend what they're going to make. Empty excuses for something badly made is not any better.

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I'm never going to pity a fandom's inability to acknowledge women who hate female characters.

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You have little room to talk if you wish more fans would acknowledge bi women in canon as being attracted to women AND men, if all you ever do is go on about how much these characters hate being attracted to men in canon and how disgusting it is. I see it all the time. Fans adding to stereotypes they claim to hate.

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I always hold in a big laugh, whenever someone says the biggest problem with how most fandoms treat m/f pairings is taking a canon pairing and making it into one where a woman "MoThErS" a male character. My brothers and sisters kicked into purgatory, this level of flanderization and obsessive need to take an m/f pairing and make it into what it is not, would not receive so many fans if that were the case. This is NOT the dynamic present. The actual problem is not only a fanbase making canon pairings very OOC, but it's making it into one where a woman is stripped of all her flaws and the man she is with only exists to be a pathetic cheerleader, as opposed to an actual character. In other words, fandoms refuse to believe that a woman in a piece of fiction can be a good character AND be with a man that compliments her flaws and strengths as much as she does with him. This is not any better than saying a fictional woman is too good or too much of a "strong female character" to be in love. This is just that under a different coat of paint. It's also very alienating in certain circles, when all a fanbase wants to do is go on about her fanon version, writes off all her canon flaws as sexism and views acknowledging how she treats her partner instead of the just how he treats her, also as sexism. The alienation also applies to how fans who actually like the canon pairing and not the fanon version that is almost unrecognizable in comparison. In addition, this level of hyper-fixating on how he treats her instead of looking at how they treat each other makes it feel like less of a relationship and more of a dull power fantasy disguised as one. I see what other fans mean when they say, "sometimes, fandom is worse."

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"I hate stereotypes." Much of those same fans: "This fictional woman is gnc/tomboy-ish. That means no one is allowed to ship her with fictional men." "This fictional woman is bi. That means no is allowed to ship her with fictional men." "This fictional woman is muscular. That means no one is allowed to ship her with fictional men." "This fictional man is effeminate. That means no one is allowed to ship him with fictional women." "This fictional woman has a mean side. That means no is allowed to ship her with fictional men." I love how hypocritical many fans are, and then are in denial they're the ones creating so much division.

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Unpopular opinion: I'm often disappointed in the lack of male oc X canon female character pairings and related fancontent in fandoms these days. Especially in regard to all this talk of bringing back canon x OC pairings. I know this won't seem like much to most who read this, but it's a bit sad when a woman in a piece of fiction has attraction to men, yet a fanbase has little or no real interest in exploring this part of her character. Mainly when you look at many of the reasons given. Such as. . . Many fandoms refuse to believe a woman can be a "strong female character," and attracted to men at the same time, looking down on that part of her character, refusing to view any pairings with male (original) characters as interesting, or outright ignoring said attraction. And then there's when we get around to canon bi female characters. Oh, when we get around to there. Yes, letting a fandom have fun with bi female characters in shipping means leaving any who ships them with male (original) characters be. They're bi. It's not that shocking. I also see this similarly with female antagonists. Both in comparison to male antagonist x female ocs or not. Look. It's great hearing how many fans and fandoms want to see more canon x OC pairings, both for bringing them back, and for helping fight back against this being "cringe" when fun to should be the focus in a fandom. And I'm in full support of that. Along with encouraging others to do that themselves. I just wish this was brought up more.

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unpopular opinion: I really cannot stand the recurring fandom takes on a fictional bi women's attraction towards men (and women). It's so annoying, when a fandom pats itself on the back for being so accepting of bi female characters in a very narrow way. Bi female characters must either hate being attracted to male characters, make fun of it every two minutes, or experience it with such a low opinion. Bi women in fiction are rarely allowed to just like the fact they're attracted to men in fanon; a fanbase can't be normal or accepting of that fact. And fans who are accepting of said character's attraction to men and women equally, are bullied or ignored for not following this mindset. In addition, it sucks when this is applied to ship dynamics and shipping in general. I'm sorry, but I don't see the appeal of every pairing involving bi female characters with male characters only being with pathetic male characters. Whether it's actual ones or flanderized canon male characters. This trope is commonly in comparison with female characters who are often allowed to be actual characters when paired with bi female characters. Which sucks when fans who don't portray that attraction to women in a "pure" way are looked at differently. Or bullied. All this stereotyping is not worth it.

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It's always been so odd to me, whenever a fan acts like there aren't any male characters demonized in shipping, when there are plenty of examples and trends to go off of. It would not surprise me if some fans who act like this are aware of said hatred; they want it to stay. For example, some male characters are often called incels or "nice guys" just for being awkward or shy around a woman they're crushing on, when that is not what either of those terms mean or refer to. Or all interactions they have with a female character are seen as trying to get with her and/or force a relationship with her. Because apparently they're not friends in canon and there's no ulterior motive present. (Or them along with many other male characters are written off as incels just on the basis of being there) And this view is commonly heightened if the female character in question that they crush on is either too much of a "strong female character," to be with a man or she's popularly shipped with another fictional woman. That latter especially. Demonizing other characters in shipping will never be a good thing. It doesn't help when no one seems to want to fight back against this view. By not fighting against it, this treatment tends to leak outside of shipping. The same contempt for male characters here is present outside. Hating a character for traits they don't hold is not any better. Ship and let ship should be the main focus. Not this.

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If you want being gnc to be normalized so badly, that means accepting and acknowledging "Le Evil Straights" in this discussion. To elaborate, there will not only be plenty of people who will be gnc and straight, but also plenty of people who are into said gnc people who are straight themselves. Not every woman into gnc men will come out as bi. Not every man into gnc women will come out as bi. The same applies to fictional characters. For both fans of said gnc characters and for fictional relationships those characters enter. And with shipping. It shouldn't surprise you to see gender nonconforming characters being shipped with the opposite gender. Don't even get me started on phrases like "this man has a lesbian's taste in women," being tossed around. Stop stereotyping. Some may realize they are bi, but expecting it to happen for each one is weird. And very gross and invasive. Also, this is not doing any favors for anyone questioning their sexuality. Stereotypes are not a step in the right direction. And it's interesting of me to say that when some who believe in this stereotype don't stand by it afterward. In other words, it's interesting how many people will say you need to be bi in order to be into gnc men & women, only to turn around and act like bisexuals don't exist. "You need to be bi in order to be into (insert gnc character here)!" (LATER) "This proves you were straight all along!" Once again, stereotypes are not a step in the right direction.

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I hate how the phrase "gay people have great taste in m/f ships" ignores biphobic gay fans in fandoms and shipping. It's not good when those same fans with "great taste" in m/f ships are also biphobic. Nor is it any better to listen to their alone opinions when it comes to m/f ships. Or worse. Which ones to ship and/or are good ships. It's all opinions.

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"I've met/know people who don't act like the ones you mentioned therefore it NEVER happens and what you said NEVER happened." Your (fandom) experiences do not mean someone else's never happened. Stop being this dismissive.

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Yeah, as a bisexual I CAN'T relate to only finding (fictional) women attractive because they're all goddesses that walk this Earth while men are weird bugs (affectionate). Sounds like yet another box to be forced into. And the assumption everyone who doesn't think like this not-so secretly hates women. Get a hobby. Which is funny of me to say, whenever someone says they're only into "weird-looking men" and the men or male characters in question are all conventionally attractive men that either smile a lot or just give off "weird" vibes. Especially attractive actors for some reason. Average man, who? I see a lot of denial.

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The lack of kind female characters in today's media is disappointing. Made more disappointing in how it's great that more fans understand that kind characters and kindness aren't boring; yet that is rarely extended over to fictional women. This also extends to when fans believe making a preexisting female character only mean makes them a good character. Being kind and/or driven by kindness is not a weakness for female characters who embody said traits.

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I'm happy to hear more and more fandoms and audiences these days are starting to get that a kind character is not inherently boring, and there are plenty of worthwhile kind characters in fiction. I'm not against edgy characters or characters in general with a "dark side" to them, but it's great to hear that not only are more growing tired or bored of the badly written ones, but ask themselves this: should a character having kindness as a big part of who they are be a barrier to being a fan of them? And more answer no. It should not. It never will.

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Many fandoms either deify female characters (strip them of all flaws) or infantilize them for very empty reasons (child-coding is one of the worse things to happen to fandom) or both, than act so surprised those same female characters are largely left behind by the same fans they force these views on. Made worse when much of those female characters are loved, but they believe everyone else must love them for aforementioned reasons, or else. The fans who treat these female characters as whole characters and as fictional people with flaws? Sexists. The fans that understand a woman in a piece of fiction does not need to fight to be a good character and loves her all the same? Misogynists. The fans who don't infantilize or deify them? How dare they hate women. The women who don't join in on all of this? Suffering from internalized misogyny. It's amazing how it's viewed as respecting (fictional) women to infantilize them or put them on a pedestal.

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Not every character in fiction who is against killing is a morally gray character. That's too broad and often not applicable to many of the examples people give of a "morally gray character" who isn't one.

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How interesting that the "ALL MEDIA IS POLITICAL!" Fans tend not to be in support of any anti-communist messages or themes in said media. Or put any to begin with. Either identical, half-baked political messages or subtext inserted by the fans that narrows down to their own interpretation. I wonder if there's any coincidence.

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Stop calling men “porn addicts” or “gooners” for liking attractive fictional women. Especially since some of you have a whole bunch of porn of your favorite male characters and some of you sexualize them way worse than a man sexualizing a female character. Porn addiction is a serious addiction like every addiction. Stop reducing it into an insult as a “gotcha” towards men because you hate men because of your one terrible experience with them. Stop letting your confirmation bias determine your opinions towards all men in fandoms. And gooner is not the insult you think it is. Might as well tell a man to edge himself to his favorite female character. He won’t see it as an insult. He’ll see it as a command. Jokes aside though, sexism in fandom generally is a huge issue. It’s not just misogyny that is an issue in fandom. It’s also misandry. You guys can’t be crying about sexism in fandom meanwhile you treat men like they’re subhuman and like they’re objects.

[hazbinsponsoredbyvee]

Happy Father's Day everyone! Question for anyone who wants to answer, but what's your favorite memory of your Dad if you had one or if they weren't toxic.

-Bi Anon

"He took me on the best daddy-daughter dates - he'd buy me anything I wanted!"

"I loved it when he would tell me stories."

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hi Cas,

Sorry to be a bother, but I don't really know who else to ask. I don't e even know how to start this, but... I have great difficulties to claim queerness for myself. Don't get me wrong, I am not cis-het, TERF and whatnot, but I have never been discriminated for my sexual or gender-identity. I am cis-presenting, bi, but in a het-relationship... people don't see me queer.

When on the other hand I tried to be part of queer communities it happened more than once that I was accused of appropriating or otherwise removed from the regarding groups.

I think it's wrong to let LGBT+ groups get divided by "not queer enough" but I am tired of fighting it, when it would be so easy just to let go, to never tell anyone anything about what I really feel, who I really am.

Maybe you have advice for me? A suggestion?

Best regards to you. You are doing a good work there and your tolerance is exemplary

Hi hon!

First, I want to remind you that the way you present and your actual identity are two different things. Whatever you look like, the way you identify is what's important.

You ARE queer. And there's nothing wrong with saying so. Bi erasure is such a horrible things that happens in the queer community, and I understand why you're tired.

But I encourage you to not let it go. Your identity is so important, don't let anyone tell you otherwise!

My suggestion would be to find people who have similar experiences to you, and build a community. If it's not possible IRL, there are a lot of people online who have similar experiences. Talk to them, commiserate with them, find support with them, and use your voice together with them. Remember that you're not alone <3

Naming you bi anon!

[the-bi-anon]

hey @birdie-ghost :D its me ur fave gay anon, bi anon (shock) so like i rlly do like ur au so yeah thats what i made idk if its good or not but 👍 hope u like it !

[birdie-ghost]

gregory running reminds me of that one meme where they’re also in the hallway but the other person is fucking floating and the other person is running weirdly. i burst in laughter about this.

JKL;SFBDSAAFSD YEA HAHA

[kingkatsuki]

Suki is like a little baby!he just want to be held by you and suck on your nipple❤❤❤

-bi anon

Lemme just run my hands through his hair while he does, cradling his head. Gotta give the man what he wants😤

[letsturnupthejuice]

Nervous bi anon here! I was just wondering if I could hold your hand? Y'know, just as an easy start before I send anything more ( ꈍᴗꈍ)

No need to be nervous, babes. I don't have much body temperature so I might steal some of yours--I like to get real close if you know what I mean. Let's see how your hand feels in mine.

[speuradair]

if sero could dress his s/o for a week, what outfits would he make them wear? would he match with them or give them the most hideous fits? (can be a blurb, hc or smth else i don‘t really care. just thought the concept is funny tdhdjdj)

respectfully,

bi anon

Okay so I made a moodboard bc I thought that would be fun (it was) lmao

Sero is a pretty stylish guy himself, so I actually think he'd be one of the best guys to go to for fashion advice! He would just dress them according to his own personal style which I think falls somewhere between grunge and skater. He's all about the matching outfits!

I don't think he'd make them wear anything weird or embarrassing, but he would definitely take this opportunity to dress them in his own clothes lmao

that flannel? It's his

That t shirt? It's his

That sweatshirt? Yeah it's his

Seeing his s/o wearing his clothes just gives him such a confidence boost and it's even better when people know that they're wearing his clothes