#billy barton

[mikyapixie]

𝐃𝐂 𝐊.𝐎 #𝟐 𝐕𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐂𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫

[xwpfan]

I'm rewatching the old Willow movie because it's a bit of a tradition to watch it in December, and because It's a favourite movie of mine.

And it reminded me that DisneyPlus removed the Willow series off of its service.

I like that damn series!

It was well written, and those were definitely Madmartigans/Sorshas kids, and we deserve to see them again!

If they are not going to make another series, the least they can do is bring back season 1!

[countryhixes]

“Hill”Billy Barton - Blues In The Blue Of Night (1953)

[kalimusing]

When Nicki was 13, she’d smuggled wine from the pantry. In her rush for rebellion, she’d managed to gag her way through most of a bottle of cooking sherry, which had done nothing but give her an upset stomach and a slight tension headache. It hadn’t stopped her from the triumphant teenage pride as she faux stumbled back to her scandalised sister. It was the closest she’d come to unsavoury behaviour until well into her twenties. Only when her mother had died, did Nicolle dare to inch out of the manufactured golden glow, that had illuminated her so brightly that even her first period hadn’t been missed by the world. She stared at the fat little worms of white sand, feeling apprehension in the base of her belly. This was Nuclear America’s nightmare. Their TV darling, shacked up with a notorious rock star, wondering whether she could snort the whole thing in one go.

“You don’t wanna do that,” Ace slurred. She inhaled in a rush, clutching at her heart. She hadn’t even known he was conscious let alone at all coherent. He looked sickly of late. She used to think all Ace cared about was drugs and music. She was only half right. Now, even on stage he seemed a husk of himself, agitated and clumsy. Formerly high functioning in his habits, Ace began to show signs of wear and tear. His last overdose had been such a close call, she’d expected him to snap out of it. Naive, really, but she had. She thought he’d stumbled closer than anyone would dare and it would jolt him back-- it would’ve jolted her back. But he’d snorted cocaine in the cab ride home. He looked as though he might sit up, but he sank deeper into the couch cushions, glassy eyed.

“Everyone used to do coke on set,” She defended, feeling like a child insisting on a sip of their father’s wine just to know the taste. He shrugged at her vaguely, dismissing his interest in her virtue. She couldn’t be Molly Camden forever. She was a woman now, not a little girl on screen. If she wanted to be taken seriously, she needed more depth than pigtails. She almost hoped he’d attempt to dissuade her again, if only to stronger her conviction. It was just cocaine. Everyone did it. Even her little sister said it helped her clinch her diet.

She took the dirty dollar, leaning forwards and all that was left was a sharp inhale. And it came as easily as if she attempted it under thirty feet of water. The sting was so sharp and unpleasant that she hadn’t even managed to lift her head before a gag filled her mouth with bile. It burned like raw chlorine and no matter how hard she rubbed at her nose to disperse the feeling, as if spreading the little clumps that hard worked their ways into the corners might get it over and done with, she felt no relief. She gagged again, petrified that she was about to throw up on the table before her, in front of everyone. Tear tracks slithered down her round cheeks as she sputtered, leaving glistening trails as the abrasive neon light made behind her eyes ache. She struggled for composure, sucking in air through her mouth instead as her cheeks burned from embarrassment as people glanced over to her theatrics. She hadn’t anticipated it to make her feel so queasy, she honestly wasn’t sure she could stand if she tried without vomiting.

She didn’t notice Billy, which was far from an easy task. On any given day, he had well over a foot on her; and in his latest ridiculous boots he ranged far closer to seven feet than six, all with the grace of a new-born deer. He squeezed her shoulder reassuringly as he passed, making her flinch. The startle shocked the nausea from her briefly, for that she was grateful. He threw himself down beside Ace in a heap, clicking in front of his eyes to ensure he was still somewhat among the living. The bassist almost smiled, eyes lazily swinging sideways onto his friend before slipping back into his comfortable void. “He’s still kicking,” Billy reported, as if she’d asked. He turned back to her, his leather ensemble squeaking against the couch as he made himself comfortable. She still struggled to regulate her breaths, taking shallow drags of air to not agitate her system.

His expression furrowed in contemplative confusion, not uncommon for the man that still added with his fingers. His eyes glanced down to the table and back at her; whatever mental gymnastics he’d been attempting had seemingly left him lost. “Does Lex know you’re fucking with smack?”

“It’s coke,” She answered back immediately, tone flat. Smack. It certainly felt like it, it was like Billy had slapped her and the room was spinning again. Maybe it never stopped.

“No?” He replied, half a question. He turned to Ace, who shook his head and shrugged. “No.” More definitive this time. “That’s heroin.” 

The roles had been drying up for the past two years, she’d gone from micromanaged to somewhat irrelevant as her youthfulness matured in true adulthood. Her agent provoked her to find her edge, find something worthwhile when she no longer had innocence and wholesome family content available to her as she aged out of relevancy. It’s what had lead to her Lexx. It was only supposed to be a couple of dates, get caught by the press a couple of times, maybe a drunk disorder story on the cover and enter everyone’s graces as someone capable of authentic darkness, or whatever the hell that meant. She’d liked him too much immediately. Loved him almost as fast to her own detriment. So much so that she almost forgot the goal of networking under new image circumstances. That meant drugs and booze at the end of the day. No one wanted an actress that said she was edgy but refused a line at production parties. This was a baby step, at least it was meant to be. Ace had watched her tiptoe off of a cliff face with next to no protest.

“Heroin!” She seethed, lurching to her feet like she might strangle Ace with her own two hands. “Are you fucking out of your mind? You let me take fucking heroin?!” Ace said nothing, if he’d heard her at all, it didn’t register. She picked up her drink from the table, taking a sip despite her quaking hands almost knocking the edge against her teeth. She was terrified, cocaine, she’d mentally prepared for. Heroin she had not. She didn’t even know what to expect beyond Ace’s lethargy. She was crying now in earnest, eyes streaming with anxiety. What if she died, did anyone die on their first use of smack? How much was too much? If that was how much Ace had been doling himself, surely that was far too much for her. More eyes began to peer at them, though she couldn’t see Lexx.

“Didn’t make you,” Ace challenged, almost ineligibly.

The glass flew from her fingers, shattering by his feet as she hurled it at him in a fury. He didn’t even blink, only rolled his lifeless eyes down to the destruction five seconds too late. “You asshole! You fucking asshole!” Billy jumped to his feet, placing himself between them as Nicki teetered between lunging at him and dropping back onto the couch to cry. Like a reluctant guard dog, he ensured she didn’t get a step closer, even going to far as to grab her wrists when she made another move for Ace when he started to chuckle.

“Ace, come on, man. Fuck. Nicki-” Billy sounded as though Ace had dinged her car, eaten the leftovers she’d been saving, ripped her favourite old shirt. Mildly annoyed, but something to get over within the afternoon. A minor inconvenience, that was all, as he stood by and watched her snort heroin. He held hands together in one of this own, his other reaching behind him to swat at the barely conscious and yet still combative Ace. Not used to playing the parent, Billy was struggling to keep them both at bay and there wasn’t a set of eyes in the room that wasn’t nervously glancing at them at this point. Her stomach turned and the urge to throw up was strong enough that the fight left her, only the fear remained.

She felt like she’d only blinked when Lexx was suddenly present and Billy’s hand released her entirely. She hadn’t been leaning on him had she? She must have as her legs went limp and left her to fold down onto couch below, like a collapsing deck chair, her knees struck her chest before she slumped back to the cushions. The room was louder than she remembered and Lexx wasn’t helping, throwing words around in every direction until he sunk down in front of her, bringing them almost nose to nose. “What’s going on? You okay?”

She went to answer, but there was no more holding it. She only managed to veer away from him, throwing up down the side of the couch and onto the floor as she struggled not to gag on her own spit. He leaned back out of her way and Nicki could hear the scrambling of nearby party goers trying to ensure their shoes remained unscathed. Her jaw was tight and uncomfortable, but she had nothing in her stomach to throw up beyond the drinks she’d consumed which now ran down the side of the couch and across the timber floor. “I can’t sit up,” she managed in a small voice. Lexx’s hands gripped her shoulders and came into focus like a dolly zoom, the rest of the world unsettlingly out of focus. She could still feel her heart pounding anxiously and whatever euphoria Ace had described in the past was not kicking in.

“She took some shit,” Billy answered for her, head low like a scolded child. He looked guilty, like it was his fault rather than Ace’s... rather than hers, for this happening. Lexx glanced up at him with wide eyes before spinning back to Nicki with an incredulous glare.

“Why the fuck would you-”

“Tried to tell her,” Ace piped up finally, still vegetated from the same position. She saw red, for a moment so angry that the paranoia and nausea faded into the background as she clumsily lurched her body forward, chin hitting Lexx’s shoulder as she snapped at Ace over his head.

“Y- didn’t tell me shit... if you said it was 'kin’ heroin I- never have-” Her voice trailed off as her body began to numb. Her faced rested in the crook of his shoulder now, mumbling sloppy apologies. “I thought it was coke.”

“She’ll be fine, who fucking cares?” Billy, turned back to Ace still trying to instigate from behind him, kicking his shin far more lightly than deserved. She couldn’t tell if he was trying to get a rise out of her or his ass kicked by Lexx. He’d been like this since his and Lacey’s last break up- then again, hadn’t they broken up because he was doing this shit? He was a bitter shell, with shallow emotions at the best of times and even with Billy glowering over him he was still muttering to himself that he’d done nothing wrong.

Brain fog rolled in, deep and heavy and Nicki didn’t seem to want to fight about this anymore. She wanted to lie down, somewhere warm. Lexx eased her back into the couch before turning to the still smiling Ace. The world stilled for just a second until he lunged at him in earnest, Billy grabbed him but it took the intervention of a further two to stop him entirely. She thought they might need a third when Ace smiled up at him, blissful in his self sabotage. Lexx shouted any angry words that came to mind, still fixated on his friend. Former friend? Only time would tell.

Billy continued to push him back, trying to deescalate the situation. “Come on man, you know he doesn’t mean it. He’s just out of it, okay?” He sounded like a kid, stuck between his parents fighting over the top of him, distressed and eager to end it. Billy thrived in dysfunction, provided that it was short term and without consequence. It rarely was and he never learned. None of them did really. His shoulders were slumped, body language screaming submission. He didn’t want to fight Lexx, he also didn’t want Lexx beating on Ace. “He didn’t mean it. He’s an asshole, but you know he’ll be sorry tomorrow okay? Just walk away, he’ll still be here.”

“Lexx,” She called too quietly, going unheard. Had she even said it aloud?

“Leave him, talk tomorrow,” Billy insisted. “He’s fucked up right now. You know how he gets without Lacey man, just talk tomorrow... He’s gonna be here and everyone’ll be sober okay, man? Just go. Go.” She’d never seen him play peacemaker like this, the first time she’d met him he had a black eye courtesy of Leon because he hadn’t stopped poking the bear no matter how many swings, but he was protective. Whether it was exclusively of Ace or the band as a whole she didn’t know, and as she could barely string how own thoughts together by the minute, she didn’t care to waste the energy. “Take your girl home, she’s gonna have a long night. We can do this tomorrow, okay?”

“Fine,” Lexx finally relented, easing into his human restraints before stepping back towards her. His voice was still frustrated and she could see the anger set in his jaw, this was not a mark that would be easily scrubbed from Ace’s ledger for anyone present. He leaned back down to her, a hand on each cheek to hold her head steady and focus her attention. “We’re gonna go home okay? It’s going to be fine. Can you stand up?” She nodded vaguely and let him help her up, though she felt like she was standing in sinking sand, he helped her stay upright, taking on her weight while she leaned.

“Please don’t be mad,” She breathed, words lighter than air. She pressed her red nose against the skin of his jaw, eyes unfocused and head somewhat lolling.

“I’m not mad,” He insisted. “We’re just going to go home and you can sleep it off alright?”

“Alright,” She mumbled.

“Alright,” He repeated back for good measure, moving them towards the door.

“Have fun!” Ace called from the couch spitefully. For an awful moment she feared he’d drop her on her ass and go for him again, but Lexx’s arms stayed firm despite the fury of his features.

“Don’t,” She begged, a single word in the hopes he’d just keep it moving to the door and get her the hell out of this.

“Fuck you,” he snapped back over his shoulder. She could hear Billy’s frustration from behind them, half ready to hit Ace himself at this point. Maybe he should. Maybe he’d finally learn. Had she learned though? Or the next party would be trying lines on the balcony with the models from Milan? She was scared and didn’t want any of this, but she had wanted coke hadn’t she? If she was smart, she wouldn’t touch any of it again; but she knew deep down, this was a sullied first attempt that would be followed regardless of tonight’s outcome. It was no less true than it was 10 minutes ago that this was what her career needed, embarrassing or not.