Jun 9, 2014
I mean, I know we're in a drought, but it's not that hard to go to Von's and buy water.
Brandon
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I mean, I know we're in a drought, but it's not that hard to go to Von's and buy water.
Brandon
On the Shittiest States List
Brandon: We don't ever get droughts, this is stupid.
Clinton: We are in a drought RIGHT NOW.
I hate this road. I call it The Stupid Road.
Brandon
I'm studying a picture of a goddamn penis. This is the worst. I didn't know there were so many things in a penis.
Brandon
Me: (whispering) I could eat more ramen. But I had ramen yesterday. I might have a problem.
Brandon: (whispering) You might. But, but don't listen to me. (pause) I'm not your conscience.
There was this girl who approved me on Tinder, but I think it was a mistake.
Brandon
Brandon: Who are you??? WHO AM I LIVING WITH???
Me: I DON'T KNOW. WHAT IF I'M CRAZY. WHAT IF I HAVE SCHIZOPHRENIA??? WOULD YOU STILL BE MY FRIEND??
Brandon: All I have to say is -- don't do LSD.
I just unleashed a battle through my butt.
Brandon