#bojackquotes

[bojack-says]

Love is an illusion, and happiness is fleeting and there's no such thing as God, and all your favorite musicians beat their wives. Allegedly.

-Diane Nguyen, S02E10: Yes And

[bojack-says]

Wanda: What happened, BoJack?

BoJack: Same thing that always happens. You didn't know me. Then you fell in love with me. And now you know me.

Wanda: You know, it's funny. When you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags.

S02E10: Yes And

[bojack-says]

And that's when you realise, the book you've been writing in your head is never gonna be a book. So, you stop-

-Diane Nguyen, S02E09: The Shot

[bojack-says]

Diane: Hey.

BoJack: Hey. You're still here?

Diane: Yup. Still here.

S02E11: Escape from L.A.

[bojack-says]

BoJack: Before you left town, you told me L.A. was a tar pit. Do you remember that?

Charlotte: Oh, God. I said so many things when I was young. I thought I was so deep.

BoJack: Well, do you still think it's true?

Charlotte: Do I think L.A. is a tar pit? No. No, I think you're the tar pit.

BoJack: Me?

Charlotte: No, not "you" you. I'm just saying...it doesn't matter where you are, it's who you are, and that's not gonna change whether you're in California, or Maine or New Mexico. You know, you can't escape...you.

S02E11: Escape from L.A.

[bojack-says]

Charlotte: Guy goes into the doctor's office. Says, "Doctor, it hurts when I do this." You know what the doctor says?

BoJack: "Don't do that."

S02E11: Escape from L.A.

[bojack-says]

Todd: Margo...I thought we agreed no guns!

Margo Martindale: Oh, is that what we agreed to? I thought we said "no gum."

Todd: But you're also chewing gum.

Margo Martindale: I'm a wild card.

[bojack-says]

Don't. Don't you dare. If you are not out of my driveway in 30 minutes, I will call the police. And if you ever try to contact me or my family again, I will fucking kill you.

-Charlotte Carson, S02E11: Escape from L.A.