#boydspeaks

[boydtheleech]

I hate feeling so utterly lonely and needing people to validate my existence in their lives

[boydtheleech]

All this life lived and I have nothing to show for it at all

[boydtheleech]

Do you ever feel the overwhelming panic to make more friends when you feel lonely? To just desperately grab onto others and try to make them like you in order to feel that horrible void a little less? To make you feel like you’re loved and deserving, even if you know they’ll leave you soon enough?

[boydtheleech]

Why do you come back to make me feel worse right as I’m moving on

I loved you more than I’ve ever loved anyone before

Why could you just stay away and pretend you never knew me

Now I just feel sick to my stomach and like I’m gonna cry

[boydtheleech]

I’m so fucking tired of everything

[boydtheleech]

It happened again. I thought they were my friend. I really did. Why did they leave me? I was there at every hour without fail. I gave up so much to be there for them. Why did they leave me. Why am I not good enough?

[boydtheleech]

It’s been almost a year since I posted here and I’m starting to get bad again. I can feel myself being ripped apart at the fringes and I keep trying to block it out. I don’t want to be upset again. I don’t want to go back to who I was.