#brooklyn 99 source

[deus-ex-incorrect-quotes]

Pritchard: For the last time, the best cop movies in order: Training Day, Lethal Weapon, and Fargo. End of discussion.

Haas: Wrong. Die Hard is the greatest cop movie of all time. One cop saving the day while everyone else stands around and watches. It's the story of my life.

Malik: I like Turner & Hooch. Tom Hanks, reluctant friendship with a dog. That hits me where I live.

Jensen: No. RoboCop. It's got everything I like. Gratuitous violence...

Haas: Oh, I thought you were listing things.

Jensen: I was. I'm done.

[dissonants-13]

It Lives In The Woods Scenarios #1

Noah (in the cavern, knife in hand territory): MC, hey. Welcome to the murder.

*

Lucas (going overboard on sussing out Andy’s new boyfriend territory): He said he'll point him out to us. So you approach on foot from the south, and me and Dan will be in an unmarked car here.

MC: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. "Me and Dan"? Didn't you mean "Dan and I"?

Lucas: Oh, God.

MC: I corrected your grammar! Are you so proud of me? Are you horrified? Are you super horny?

*

Lucas (at the cinema seeing Moneyball, 2011 territory): The statistical analysis! (sobs) It’s so beautiful!

*

Andy (preparing for the siege on the ruins, pre-Jane is Redfield bombshell territory): Is the equipment secure?

MC: Check.

Andy: Weapons ready?

MC: Check.

Andy: Did you have breakfast?

MC: What? That's not on the checklist.

Andy: I added it because I care about you.

MC: No, I did not have breakfast.

Andy: Unacceptable. Look in your pocket.

MC: Hey, there's little chocolate chips in this.

Andy: Yeah, I'm not an idiot. I know how to trick my friends into eating their fiber.

*

Ava (cafeteria territory): So we have good news, and we have bad news.

Lily: My Nana always said, "Bad news first because the good news is probably a lie." Fun fact: she made me cry a lot.

*

MC (hanging out at Dan’s, ripping on the blue hoodie territory): What? You don't need closet space. You have, like, one outfit.

[deus-ex-incorrect-quotes]

Jensen: I happen to be a very good secondary(agent).

[flashback]

Macready: [interrogating suspect] So you were just borrowing those cars?

[Jensen starts banging on the one-way glass from outside the interrogation room]

Jensen: Ask about his bank account. Ask about his bank account! Ask him about his bank- [The glass shatters] -account. You should ask him about his bank account.

Jensen: [Leaving] Miller! Macready broke the glass!