tw: afab reader, p links, rough sex, dp, threesomes, oral (fem and male receiving), size kink, anal, breeding, toys, monsterfucking(?), general horniness
! rivals women p links here !
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ADAM WARLOCK
↪ adam loooooves taking it slow, not even bothering to slip you out of your panties, rubbing himself against your puffy clit. your slick heavily coats his tip, and he indulges you by putting just a little bit of his dick in shallow stokes before pulling out, just to do it all over again.
BLACK PANTHER
↪ it’s like a symphony in t’challa’s ears – the rhythmic clapping of your ass alongside your deliciously sweet moans. the man owns an intergalactic empire, and yet his favorite place ever is right under your body where he can plunge deep into your cute holes while holding you tight.
BLADE
↪ when you feel like taking charge, eric just lays back and enjoys the view. your confident smirk hovering over his face while you set your own pace – slow and deep, just like he likes it. it’s even better when you reach a hand down to help your pussy out in stroking his fat dick.
BRUCE BANNER
↪ bruce is the definition of a munch. this man will press your legs against your stomach and bury his face in your pussy without you uttering so much as a word. lapping at your leaking hole, drooling on your sensitive clit, there’s no doubt he’s in this for the love of the game.
CAPTAIN AMERICA
↪ steve’s entire body underwent a massive upgrade thanks to the super soldier serum, and his dick was no exception. it’s so hard for him to get past the tip inside you despite how badly he wants it :( next time you better slobber over it some more before trying to take on his monster.
CLOAK (+ BONUS DAGGER)
↪ you can’t have tyrone without tandy, whether anyone would want to or not, so why not make the most out of it? you and tandy take turns on his cock, helping each other take as much as you can, the sight of both your faces enough to help him release a thick, gooey load into your mouth.
DAREDEVIL
↪ patroling the streets is hard work, please let matt use your body to take out his frustration! it’s hard enough dealing with the evil in hell’s kitchen, he just wants to have some semblance of control. let him drive his cock deep into you and fuck you stupid so he can feel like he’s doing something right.
DOCTOR STRANGE
↪ stephen still knows how to use his fingers juuuust right when it comes to bringing you pleasure. two digits are all he needs to stretch you out, readying you for his thick aching dick. he uses his magic to create a makeshift cockring that is snug enough to swell his already large member that stuffs you full.
GAMBIT
↪ remy is a kinky motherfucker – sex is always something new with him. recently, he discovered just how much you moan and babble nonsense when he charges a bit of kinetic energy into his cock and drives it into your puckered asshole. a few thrusts in and you’re already begging him to let you cum.
HAWKEYE
↪ as much as he loves the act itself, clint gets a special kind of pleasure right after sex, when he pulls his dick out and finds his cum leaking out of you. he helps you clean up your messy pussy by pushing the mess running down your ass back up to your clit, giving it another little rub with his tip.
HUMAN TORCH
↪ even with all his experience, johnny still finds himself learning about what women like. ever since he found out how quickly you cum when he kisses you during missionary, it’s become like an addiction for him to lean down and make out with you while he drives his cock in and out of your sweet cunt.
IRON FIST
↪ lin is always so eager to do anything with you. sit on his face, rub him with your thighs, take his energetic thursts like a good girl and he’ll make you see stars. it’s not his fault you’re so soft and that your walls squeeze so tight around him every time that he always thinks he’lll cum too fast :(
IRON MAN
↪ only you knew how nasty tony could be. he’d already cum a couple of times, stuffing you full of his thick loads and soiling the sheets. the sight of your cunt taking him completely from behind, cum leaking and lube shining only makes him thrust harder and deeper to see how much bigger of a mess he could make.
LOKI
↪ what good are loki’s clones if he doesn’t use them on his pretty girl? it may take a lot of work to prep you every time to make sure you can take him in your ass and your pussy, sure, but it’s worth it when you moan like a pornstar every time he “accidentally” stuffs two dicks in one hole.
MAGNETO
↪ erik has some tolerance for your bratty behavior, but it sometimes gets to a point where he needs to shut you up the best way he can: using his large size to get on top of you and fuck your body into submission, just rough enough for you to stop your whining and start begging him to cum inside you.
MISTER FANTASTIC
↪ reed is one of the smartest men alive, and he uses this feat to analyze your reactions whenever he fucks you. he memorized the exact spot deep inside you that makes you moan the loudest and let out the most obscenities, focusing that one spot to drill into and overstimulate you.
MOON KNIGHT
↪ marc gets too into his head sometimes, often resulting in him muttering sweet praises in your ear while he continuously digs his cock deep into your cunt, far after you have already come twice. he doesn’t notice your fucked-out face or the fact that you’ve stopped responding coherently to his mumbling until after he’s buried a load inside you.
NAMOR
↪ namor is used to the royalty treatment as the king of the seas, and his authority extends to his favorite plaything: you. guiding your head down on his cock and stroking it against your cheek, he doesn’t miss an opportunity to remind you of your place and making sure you understand he owns you.
SPIDER-MAN
↪ peter may be too shy to admit it, but his favorite way to cum is after you’ve teased him to hell and back, stroking his cock and praising him for being such a gooood boy. he gets too loud, so be sure to put a hand on his mouth or stick your tongue down his throat to quiet his needy moans while his cum spurts out, tainting your hands.
STAR-LORD
↪ peter fucks you on the pilot seat of the guardians’ ship every time you ask him to. with the way you’re dripping at the thought of possibly getting caught and the quiet, shallow moans you let out as he moves your body up and down on his cock until you cum multiple times, how could he say no?
THE PUNISHER
↪ frank makes love to you in all kinds of different positions, but he always has his thick hands on you. he needs to feel you, to get as close as possible to you during this most vulnerable act to show you what he cannot always do with words: that he fucking loves you and the tight squeezing of your pussy as you milk him dry.
THE THING
↪ ben is HUGE. there’s no way to sugarcoat it, but the already large hunk of a man was only made larger after his transformation. thanks to reed and a specialized condom he designed for your pleasure, you and ben have been at it like horny teenagers every chance you get, making sure all you can think about is your lover’s thick cock splitting you open.
THOR
↪ size queens beware! thor has such a big, heavy cock that you can’t help but put it in your moth first thing when he takes it out his pants. his godliness shows in the way it hangs due to its own weight, like a trophy on display. don’t forget to play with his balls, hot and heavy, prepping the god-sized loads to come.
ULTRON
↪ ultron’s dislike of humanity comes through when he’s playing with you. he’s mean; he uses toys on you before he even thinks about letting you fuck him. hours go by with the vibrations on your clit pushing you to the edge of ecstasy until he takes the toy away completely, reveling in the way your tears flow down your face as you beg him to let you cum.
VENOM
↪ eddie tries his best to be gentle with you, but it’s so hard when he’s got you pinned down, balls deep in your warm holes. despite your incessant cries of pleasure, all he can hear in his head is the voice of a certain alien demanding him to breed her, breed her, breed her. we are insatiable.
WINTER SOLDIER
↪ bucky has been through so much that you take it upon yourself to take care of him. you eagerly do all the work, rhythmically fucking back into his dick with enough force to send ripples through the skin of your ass. he thinks you’re spoiling him with the way you focus on his pleasure first.
WOLVERINE
↪ when logan puts his mind to something, there’s no stopping him. that includes when he sets his mind to your pussy and demands you drop everything to sit on his face that instant. you leak your juices all over his jaw and hands as he alternates between prodding his tongue into your hole or curling his fingers into your soft spot.
a/n:
yeahhh I'm a huge pervert <3 i've been a fan of marvel in general for forever but there's something about the rivals' versions of these characters that make me feral
summary: You want to train Bruce's heart rate from spiking too high during sex, and it ends in actual sex.
warnings: smut, sub!bruce, he's kind of a masochist in this ngl, cockwarming, unprotected sex, edging, dacryphilia, choking, bruce banner has a degradation kink I don't make the rules
wc: 1.5k
note: so I know this concept is kind of impossible bc why would ur heartrate go that high during sex right? But please just go with it for the plot okay (honestly I lost the plot somewhere in the beginning of this fic. It's just smut.)
—. I wrote this in 30 minutes and called it a day. anyway bruce banner my underrated husband, I needed to write about him
Bruce Banner was not an easy man. He was closed off, a little insecure, and too smart for his own good. More often than not, you had to wrench the truths you wanted out of his heart. In fact, it was almost a full time job to keep him from isolating himself and wallowing in his own solitude.
Of course, it'd gotten better. Ever since you met him and openly loved him, Bruce had become more confident, more open, and more trusting in himself.
The one occasion he still absolutely didn't trust himself was during sex.
It's not that there was an inherent problem; his heart rate could never spontaneously get so high during an orgasm to make him Hulk out. You could have sex just fine. But Bruce was an anxious man, and he never wanted to get on top in fear of losing himself to the pleasure. He wanted you to be on top, in control, not only because he liked it, but because it was what he deemed safe.
But maybe you wanted to get fucked into the mattress every once in a while, too. And since Bruce didn't trust himself to do so, you were just gonna have to train him to stay calm.
...Which is how you ended up on the couch with his cock inside of you, unmoving. You'd gotten to undressing, even putting him in had been okay. But after a few minutes of riding his cock, Bruce's heartrate spiked. And if you had one goal in having sex today, it was for his heartrate to stay low.
So you'd stilled your movements, waiting until it slowed again, effectively subduing his building orgasm. Bruce's hands pawed at your hips; to get you off him or make you move again, you couldn't tell.
"C'mon Banner, you gotta calm down. I'll only continue if you do," you grinned at him.
"You're enjoying this far too much," Bruce grumbled, closing his eyes as he laid his head back against the couch.
"I'm doing this for you," you cooed sweetly at him. "I'm doing this so you'll be able to fuck hard. And we both know how desperate you are to get your dick wet, huh?"
You could feel his cock twitch inside of you as he breathed out, "Stop talking."
A small laugh escaped you. "Right. I forgot how easy you are."
Bruce bucked up into you, firmly gripping your hips to keep you still. Using you to get himself off.
It was a good thing at least one of you remembered today's goal. Your hand around his neck moved to his chest, pushing him back against the couch. "Bruce, stop."
The only response you got was a whine, the man under you continuing his humping as he screwed his eyes shut.
"Bruce," you said his name as a warning. "Stay still."
Bruce huffed, chest heaving, but did as you said. He stopped his movements, cutting off his orgasm for the second time now.
A long, dramatic sigh sounded through your living room. "So we're just going to stay like this?"
"Until you learn how to control yourself, yes."
Bruce didn't respond. You leaned forward, slinging both your arms around his neck for a sweet hug as if you weren't butt naked with his cock inside of you. Your nipples rubbed against him and Bruce could feel himself getting hot all over again at the feeling.
Despite having established a long time ago that he was a sucker for you being mean to him, the feeling of your nipples on his bare skin was what caused his cheeks to turn pink. You had to hold back a snort.
Then again, he'd probably like it if you laughed at him a little.
"Okay, here's what were gonna do," you started.
Bruce perked up, moving his head back to look at you from where he'd buried his face in your neck.
You moved a finger to your clit. "I'm gonna get myself off," rolling your hips back and forth, making sure not to stimulate him too much, "on your cock."
Bruce agreed breathlessly, mindlessly. "Okay."
"And you're not gonna cum."
His face contorted, but he didn't argue, glad for any kind of stimulation at all.
"Understood?"
You grabbed his cheeks with your other hand, squeezing them. His answer came out muffled.
"Yes, ma'am."
A devilish grin appeared on your face. "Good boy."
The praise made his cock twitch again, his precum mixing with your arousal making it easy to gyrate your hips around a little. The movement of your fingers on your clit intensified, and you moaned out, eyes half-lidded.
You were so lost in your own pleasure that you didn't notice Bruce bucking his hips again, trying to get you to ride him.
"Please..." A pained groan escaped him, and as you opened your eyes fully, you took note of how hard your sharp nails were digging into his bicep. His cock jumped inside of you as you raked them down his flesh.
"You wanna cum, Bruce? Hmm?"
"Yes," he sighed.
"Can't hear you," you grinned, teasing him.
"Yes! I wanna cum," Bruce mewled, letting his head fall to the side as shame burned through him. He hated feeling so desperate, and yet there was nothing that got his cock harder.
You stilled your movements completely. "But that's not the goal today, is it?"
Bruce groaned in frustration, a loud, unchecked sound that could only have escaped due to the effects of having his orgasm cut off for the third time in a row.
"Is it?" you asked again, fingers gripping his dark locks and tugging. Bruce lifted his head up obediently, looking back at you with wild, wet eyes. At the sight of tears forming, you had to hold back a smile. He was so easy.
"I don't care," he huffed quietly, gripping your hips and moving them back and forth himself. You scoffed, harshly taking his hands from your body and pinning them to the couch beside him.
"Since when are you so selfish? 'I don't care'? This is for the greater good, Bruce," you grinned again. "We're doing this so you'll be able to fuck me how I want it."
"I can—I can do anything you want. Please. Just let me come," he begged almost deliriously, only wanting to come.
"Look at that. Big, bad Hulk, begging to get off."
His hips bucked harshly into yours, almost knocking you off of him, but you held firm and pinned him down again.
"Yeah, not so strong now, huh?"
"Please!" an almost pornographic moan escaped his lips in response. If you weren't so used to seeing him in this state already, you'd marvel over the sight of awkward, shy professor Banner acting like a slut.
"You gonna hold it, Banner?"
"N—I can't," he sobbed, clawing at the couch as his orgasm approached. Moving one hand to rub your clit again, you let out a soft sigh.
His hips had settled in a frantic rhythm with yours, making you breathless from the pleasure as well.
"You can't?" you mocked, igniting another sharp burst of burning shame and arousal in him. Bruce shook his head frantically.
"No, can't, can't hold it," another sob wrecked through him, more tears escaping his closed eyes. Your free hand went to grab his throat loosely, holding him in place as you brought your face inches from his. Tentatively, you licked a few tears from his face, making Bruce gasp as his eyes opened to stare into yours.
"Taste so good when you cry," you whispered to him, before crashing your lips on his and making him taste for himself. Bruce moaned into your mouth unabashedly, the sound mixing with your own moans of approval.
Your hand on his throat tightened, and Bruce gasped out. "I'm—I'm gonna... Please!"
"Cum in my pussy, Bruce," you grinned, speeding up the finger rubbing your clit. "Be a good boy and fill me up."
He gripped you harshly, fingers closing around your hips, holding you still as he bucked up again, spilling into you. A cry escaped his lips as he came, followed by a gasp of "thank you!", riding out the aftershocks.
Falling limp, Bruce let go of your hips again, but you didn't stop. You were so close, and seeing him cum was pushing you over the edge. As he gasped out at the overstimulation, tears welling in his eyes again, you felt the knot in your lower stomach snap.
Moaning out softly, you held on to Bruce's shoulder with one hand for support as you rode out your own orgasm. Bruce secured his arms around you to keep you steady, softly whining into your neck as you used his spent cock.
When your high subdued, you slumped forward in his arms. "Guess that cockwarming idea failed."
Bruce laughed. "Maybe for the best."
"Don't think this is over," you grumbled against his neck, too tired to sound stern. "We're still gonna train your heart rate control."
Bruce sighed, moving you both to lay horizontically on the couch, softening cock still inside you. "Yes, ma'am."
— 𝓣ony 𝓢tark :: tony likes to think he isn’t jealous person. he’s a billionaire, playboy, philanthropist— why would he possibly have anything to be jealous about? but my god, he’s one of the most jealous men you know. the second he sees someone flirting with you, he’ll immediately insert himself into the conversation, sliding an arm around your waist and making sarcastic little jokes and backhanded compliments to the poor person. he’ll insist he’s not jealous, but somehow his arm gets tighter around you every time they make you laugh.
— 𝓢teve 𝓡ogers :: steve will do everything in his power to be mature about someone flirting with you. he trusts you completely, so he’ll try to ignore the little pang of jealousy, but he can’t help himself from hovering nearby. he’ll go quiet, watching from across the room before eventually wandering over and casually asking if everything’s okay. he’ll insist he wasn’t checking up on you, but somehow he’ll stay right by your side for the rest of the conversation.
— 𝓝atasha 𝓡omanoff :: natasha would never admit she’s jealous. she’s far too controlled for that. instead, she’ll quietly watch from across the room, studying the person flirting with you with an unreadable expression. eventually, she’ll walk over, slip an arm around your waist and offer them a polite smile that somehow feels like a warning. she won’t say anything outright, but the message is crystal clear: you’re wasting your time.
— 𝓛oki 𝓛aufeyson :: loki is jealous in the most insufferably offended way possible. he’s genuinely disgusted by the fact you could find any man attractive who isn’t him. he’ll saunter over when someone’s flirting with you, rest his hand against your lower back and make increasingly sarcastic remarks until they finally leave. he’ll watch them go with a look of pure disdain before turning to you, completely baffled. “What horrid taste you have,” he’ll mutter, as though the real problem is your questionable judgement rather than his jealousy.
— 𝓑ucky 𝓑arnes :: bucky goes completely silent when he’s jealous. he doesn’t interrupt or make a scene, but he’ll watch from across the room, jaw tightening slightly whenever the person makes you laugh. eventually he’ll wonder over and stand beside you, his hand settling against your waist as he gives the person a dirty look. he won’t say much, but once they leave, he’ll mutter something about how he “didn’t like the guy” as if that explains everything.
— 𝓦anda 𝓜aximoff :: wanda initially tries ignore the jealousy, giving a poor attempt at pretending she’s interested in whatever conversation she’s having whilst stealing subtle glances at the person flirting with you. eventually, curiosity gets the better of her and she’ll quietly read their mind, just to make sure she actually has a reason to be jealous. once she confirms they’re interested in you, she’ll wander over and casually join the conversation, standing a little closer to you than necessary and making it very clear who you’re with.
— 𝓑ruce 𝓑anner :: bruce tries to convince himself he’s imagining things. he’ll notice somebody flirting with you and immediately tell himself they’re probably just being friendly, getting awkwardly quiet as he watches from nearby. he’ll try to focus on whatever he’s doing, but will accidentally reveal just how bothered he is by making some nervous little comment about how the guy seems “very interested” in you. the second the words leave his mouth, he’ll realise he’s given himself away and awkwardly try to backtrack.
— 𝓢cott 𝓛ang :: scott doesn’t actually realise he’s jealous until someone else points it out, to which he’ll immediately scoff and insist he isn’t. he’ll wonder over anyway, casually inserting himself into the conversation with some painfully unfunny joke aimed at you and the person flirting. when they leave, he will watch them for a moment before turning back to you, completely oblivious to the fact that jealousy was written all over his face.
— 𝓟eter 𝓟arker :: peter would try so hard to act like he isn’t jealous, but he’s terrible at hiding it. he’ll awkwardly hover nearby, pretending to be interested in whatever’s happening around him whilst repeatedly glancing over at you. eventually, he’ll wander over and start rambling about something completely random, clearly trying to interrupt the conversation without actually admitting why.
summary: the avenger's preference when it comes to the bedroom and very specific kinks i believe they have
a/n: thank you to the doomsday trailer for reawakening the marvel obsession, and sparking this convo between my best friend and i. @goldenbrowns love you babe, most of my fics wouldn't be possible without our daily discussions. as always MDNI! and enjoy<3
bucky barnes! after figuring out the ways of the modern world, he would be interested in trying some bdsm, before realizing how rough in can be which completely turned him off. he's definitely on board with light choking, but when you suggested trying knife play and gun play, he was unsure. it took him a while to understand that you trusted him, out of all people, enough to use weapons he took so many lives with, now creating new memories and a deeper bond between the both of you. apart from that, nothing gives him more of a thrill than when you're at a bar, a few drinks in and he's taking you to the bathroom and making you choke on his cock.
steve rogers! he's a very simple man, not very willing to try new things. he knows what he likes and what works for him, even if it may be considered vanilla, but that's okay! because when he's sitting you on top of him, holding you up by your hips and fucking up into you with a fast and steady pace, you don't care who can hear you or how sore you'll be from yelling the next day. he always makes sure he didn't go to far, even if you assure him that he could be rougher, kissing the top of your head and holding you until you fall asleep in his arms.
tony stark! a pervert, obviously. he'll take you anywhere and anyway he can. he loves trying new things and taking his time exploring your body, figuring out what makes you squirm and moan. loves taking you in the backseat of the car on a way to a meeting; not caring that happy knows exactly what you two are doing back there. he surprises you every month with rigs and gadgets that he made specifically to use you as his test subject. he'd record his findings, of course, propping up a camera in your direction so he can rewatch and figure out how to make his invention better; no other reason...
bruce banner! secretly but unsurprisingly, he's also a pervert. daily pussy inspections, which he claims are for your health, you know better but don't complain. much like his playboy friend, he likes to experiment on you, sometimes they do it together without you knowing. bruce comes to tony with what he suspects is sex pollen and wants to put it to the test. you're unknowingly going about your day, having lunch with wanda and nat when it hits you, excusing yourself after half and hour of unbearable heat pooling between your legs, oblivious to the men turning off the meta glasses they had to log their results.
sam wilson! an ass man through and through. position where he can see your ass he's doing that. he also loves watching your reflection, pressing you against any bathroom counter and seeing your eyes roll to the back of your head as your ass bounces back on him. he even went to the lengths of installing a mirror above his bed so he could see you in every possible angle.
loki laufeyson! let's be so honest this man is into anything and everything, but i firmly believe that he loves making you wear his helmet and pulling on the horns. especially when he has you on all fours, too tired to hold yourself up, a little spell to make sure the helmet doesn't slip from your head and he's forcing you to arch your back for hours on end. speaking of spells, binding is his favorite go to, contorting you in ways you didn't think possible and keeping you there.
thor odinson! like his brother, he's had many years of experience to try a plethora of positions, toys and locations. he prides himself in his strength so he loves taking you against a wall, or just holding you up as he bounces you up and down his cock. however, he dreams of laying you face down in his silk sheets, spreading your legs and laying mjölnir on your lower back, restricting you of all movement and using you for his own selfish pleasure.
peter parker! he doesn't necessarily have a favorite position, but he does have a preference for cowgirl. entranced by the way your tits bounce in his face, he's willing to do anything and everything you tell him to, still not sure how he managed to date a beautiful woman like you. he would be crushing on you way before you actually got together, almost in a creepy way. even now, he can't help himself from secretly stealing some of your underwear so he can jerk off to it at home. he loves you, and loves pleasuring you, so who is he to be anything but the perfect boy for his favorite girl?
stephen strange! loves edging you for hours, making you beg and squirm around his fingers before he even fucks you properly. he'd tell you he was teaching you patience, and that you were failing miserably. when he finally lets you cum, he's using the time stone to go back a few seconds and make you cum again. on days when he's feeling a bit crueler than usual, he's using the stone to hold you over the edge longer than you could mentally take.
matt murdock! because of his heightened senses, he loves taking his time with you and mapping out your body, no matter how many times he's done this. it could be hours before actually fucks you, taking his time between your legs, marking your thighs and belly with his teeth, wanting to commit your whole body to memory with everyone of his remaining senses. shamelessly sniffs you and your underwear, convincing you he could get high solely from that. he'd never deny you an orgasm, oh no, he'd give in to any request and plead you throw his way, though reluctant to fuck you and have his indulging cut short.
frank castle! not a single gentle moment with this man, at least until it's over and he's making you dinner and bathing you. before that though, he's grabbing both your wrists behind your back and mercilessly pounding into you, holding your head down with his rough palm. not even when he's making you ride his thigh, the rough denim of his jeans rubbing against you, one hand cradling the back of your head as the other slaps your ass, "come on baby, i know you can do better than that." he's not giving you a break until you make yourself cum, and after that he's cleaning you up with his mouth, not caring how overstimulated you are.
Note: Not beta read. Idk wtf I was doing but have this 👐🏻 tagged things because of platonic or family based relationships.
Stark!Reader who's life has been sadly similar to her father's after thinking she needed to follow in his footsteps perfectly and have several doctorates by the time she's in her early 20s.
Stark!Reader who's also a Thunderbolt because she was publicly recognized as an Avenger after the war.
Stark!Reader who used to date a certain super powered boy but doesn't remember him at all because of his sacrifice for the sake of everyone's safety.
Stark!Reader who is second in command after Bucky but actively pushes her responsibility off to Yelena because she would rather putter around a lab instead.
Stark!Reader who was pushed into flying into space with her suit after a mysterious spaceship entered the earths atmosphere. Only to make contact and direct that ship down to Wakanda before flying off to contact her own team.
Stark!Reader who's the first to meet the Fantastic Four and have Johnny Storm immediately obsessed with her intellect. Fully understanding his sister Sue's attraction to his brother-in-law now. The way his eyes twinkle when looking at her is lost on nobody but her.
Stark!Reader trying to ignore him while speaking with Dr. Richards, only to be made fun of by adults older than her, John and Ava, about a "big blonde puppy" following her around once everyone is back in the tower. But others, Bob and Alexei, seem to be in support of it.
Stark!Reader who seemed to have made this man completely smitten with dismissive words and a few glares. But she has more important things to attend to. Like helping out her Uncle Bruce and the boy her age he asked for help with.
Stark!Reader who's highly confused by the tension rolling off the smitten blonde and overly annoyed brunette. Bunting heads at every turn as she's just trying to work and figure things out but neither of them are helping at all.
𓂃 ࣪ ࣪⋆✩˚ ༘ [thee avengers]: The Concept of ‘Fucked’ in Different Contexts
— in which! you somehow found yourself in the middle of chaos in debris-filled NYC with no recollection of how you got there in the first place.
OR soulmates exist and you were the lucky egg tethered to the Earth's Mightiest Heroes (but here's the catch: you have zero fucking idea).
word count: 3.0k
content! cliché, very crackfic-adjacent, NO DEFINITE TIMELINE YET, idiots being idiots, reader's dealing with an existential crisis, reader judging alien's guts, maybe mildly improper use of research & mathematics terminologies (tho i'm pretty sure it's not, but just in case), SOULMATES AU!, questionably executed poly bcuz i'm greedy n i want them all to fall for you, not beta'ed we die like my will to live when my goat sacrificed himself, eng not my first lang, i gave up proofreading this halfway i'm not gonna lie, you can never peer pressure me to update i fear NO ONE (i have zero concept of time im so sorry <3), you're kidnapped lawl, EVERYBODY SAY THANK YOU FOR THE NEW TRAILER
SITUATION: sandwiched between—let’s see—a super soldier behind you, a god in front of you, and a genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist to your left. What a dream. And it really would’ve if you were lying peacefully under the covers of your bed, in the safety of your room, which, fun fact, you weren’t. And the sting (understatement, more accurately described as burn, actually) from your shoulder blade and (now) wrist is enough proof of that.
“Stark.” Steve pointed, “How nice of you to drop in,” with the tiniest hint of annoyance.
Why? Oh, because you were metaphorically drooling for the guy. He was pretty sure you were already undressing robot heart over there mentally, with the way there were almost-visible hearts in your eyes. If you could read Steve’s mind, even you wouldn’t object. You would agree wholeheartedly.
“Uhmm, Miss…? You’re drooling a little, I think.” The surprise guest of honor noted, verbally, lightly pointing to the corner of your lips—which you immediately checked because of course you would! Only to find nothing. Not a single drip. Not a wet spot. That man is a menace. “I mean I get it, I do. But decorum, y’know? We all have an image to maintain.”
That little comment made your eye twitch, your mouth moving and spewing words before your brain could even process what the fuck it entailed. “Sure, whatever you say, golden titanium guy.”
A minute ago, one could describe you as smug in that totally amazing comeback—the quirk found on the side of your lips was enough proof of that. But that was a minute ago. Now, you’re fucking terrified. To say that you were shocked by your own words would be an understatement—you froze, taking a moment to register what the fuck you just said and contemplating whether to run in humiliation or kill yourself in front of three of the Earth’s Mightiest Heroes™️.
Because it would’ve been fine if Iron Man himself released his suit blueprint to the press—or maybe if it was leaked from somewhere—‘cause then you would’ve had a concrete alibi. You could’ve blamed it on the press. You could’ve blamed it on the leakers who released the files in 144p resolution. But it wasn’t. None have been close enough to leak even a smidgen of it. All they had was the very first model made out of scraps and deconstructed missile parts. Only the born-genius CEO Mr. Anthony Edward Stark (and very close friends) would know the specifics.
It was then that you came to an interesting realization that your very hyperactive mouth would possibly be the death of you.
Tony paused, the gears in his head slowly turning while he tried to digest your mini fuck-up. “Okay, first of all, it’s titanium gold-alloy; get your stolen facts straight—it’s in the specifics. Second… how do you know that?”
“What that?” As you can see, your new tactic is to play dumb, and it’s working pretty heavenly so far. Heavy on the so far part.
“That! Because as far as I know—‘cause, TMI, I control which files get released—and that, specifically, was not public info.”
“I—woah—I didn’t say anything. Did you see me say something…?” You looked at Thor for backup, telepathically pleading to go along with your bullshit—and by telepathic, you mean obnoxiously large eyes staring and quick eyebrow quirks. He slowly shook his head before looking away, avoiding further eye contact. Suspiciously. “Exactly! Even the big guy agreed. I said nothing.”
Tony lifted a finger, mouth opening as if he was intending to make a point. Blinked once. The point vanished. His mouth closed, finger still raised. “You’re trying to gaslight me, aren’t you?” As if the realization had finally settled, he continued, “It’s not working.”
“I’m really no—what was that?” You froze, feeling the low vibrations from the ground in your already weakened knees—either from defending your case or the earlier happenings, you don’t quite recall.
Then all of a sudden, their tiny in-ear comms buzzed, a certain redhead assassin’s voice coming through. “Hey, you’ve got an incoming.” She said, almost out of breath, as she wrestled a mob of human-sized cyclops aliens, inching closer to where all of you were.
So really, it’s no surprise that even you—the resident if-I-don’t-see-it-it-doesn’t-exist—noticed, ‘cause that hair was criminally way too iconic to forget, and, apparently, your dirt-poor eyesight seemed to turn into perfect 20/20 vision when hot women were present (relatable).
But focusing on the rising issue at hand.
It felt as if time stood still, neither of you moving an inch except for taking a few puffs of breath, waiting for the unexpected. Well, that was until a huge monstrosity appeared in your peripherals, making your flight-or-flight (in this specific situation) reflexes activate. It was green—and no, it wasn’t Hulk (but even if it was him, you think you’d react the same way—in the name of self-preservation and all). It has a face vaguely reminiscent of an ant if you’ve seen it under a microscope, and a big, bulky body that puts sixteen-wheelers to shame.
Now, in theory, this would be the perfect time to try and experiment with hypothesis number three—for the sake of science, of course. However, you’re gonna take an educated guess that if that thing does as much as touch you, you really wouldn't be able to test the rest of your hypotheticals. Permanently.
So you infer that it would be more than nice to sit this one out. Flight it out, if you will.
“We’re gonna continue this conversation later. We’re not done yet.” Tony muttered, briefly looking at you before taking off—with you comfortably nestled in his arms, in an unexpected princess carry. You could only do as much as blink before you were already up in the sky, hands grazing the clouds. Man, whoever sold the story that clouds are soft was fucking lying. It felt damp—and sad.
“Oh my fucking god, I’m airborne.” You whispered, half from disbelief, half from glee. It's not your fault you couldn’t hide that giddy excitement bubbling inside you! Because damn, you weren’t only flying literal meters above the ground; you were also being carried by thee fucking Iron Man—in the flesh! Not to mention the on-the-spot encounters with three Avengers? Holy shit.
“First time?” Your kidnapper quipped, still as smug as ever. You’d smack him if you could—but you wouldn’t, not when he literally has a hold of your life right now.
And Tony—poor, unfortunate Tony—does not fucking understand why he brought you with him. So don’t even attempt to ask—he, too, does not have the answer. He needs his lawyer. And maybe his emotional support american cheeseburger. Because the fuck—what was he thinking, swiping an innocent civilian all of a sudden? It’s not as if you were alone; the captain and the god were with you—you would’ve been safe either way. But it felt as if pure instinct took over, and in the briefest moment of weakness, he’d already gotten you 15 meters off the ground.
“Ugh,” You groaned, with all the dramatics your afloat body has, “You’re annoying,” and finished with a faux sigh.
And Tony, never one to leave a good banter (even if a thousand unsaid thoughts plagued his mind), jumped at the chance. “Thanks, it’s part of the charm.” And god, you can just feel his infuriating, signature smirk without looking inside the robo-suit.
You really, really would've been pissed if only you didn’t have this unfair favoritism toward this overgrown, genius nepo baby (technically).
That’s a lie; favoritism does not exist in your vocabulary.
…But if you were asked, though, your answer may or may not bear a close resemblance to a lady assassin somewhere in the vicinity… perchance… maybe…
“You’re charming? Really?” You deadpanned, feigning disinterest as you attempted to fight off that smile trying to burst from your conniving lips. And damn, you thought you did a pretty good job… but the thought quickly disappeared when you could just feel the judgment radiating off the most verbal judger there is (a.k.a. him, the one and only).
“Sweetie, I saw the heart eyes. You’re not fooling me.”
Now that made you roll your eyes. “Great, you just ruined it.”
“The foreplay? Oh, I would never!” He exclaimed with all the drama he could flare up—channeling his inner (and outer) diva to mess with you. Tony thinks he’s flirting; you just think he’s cosplaying an idiot.
“Eugh,” your eyes rolled on their own, “Not with that attitude, you w—”
The static coming from his helmet-thing cut you off, hearing a faint buzz of comms from the concerningly close proximity you had. No, seriously—it’s mere inches. And it would’ve been romantic if only you weren’t currently negotiating with your eyes not to roam down—only because you’re like a thousand percent sure that the moment you take a glimpse, motor sense and mobility would have you imagine free-falling and plummeting to the cold, hard ground. It’s not a good look.
Meanwhile Tony? Yeaaahhh, he’s enjoying this far too much. He had F.R.I.D.A.Y. scanning your micro-expressions and he’s damn sure you’re close to ruining your pants right at this very moment. He could weaponize that, yes, then maybe he’ll bore witness to your flushed face? What a reward. Your flushed face, he meant. Don’t get it twisted.
“Don’t fall down now.” Tony jested, holding you tighter and amping up the speed of his gear as he tried to pinpoint a safe roof to drop you off.
“You’re literally holding me—fuck, don’t literally drop me!” And you’re fighting for your life, as you can see; holding on even tighter—tightest, actually.
Tony finds it adorable, and he’s royally pissed off ‘cause he has zero idea why. It’s unbecoming of him, really. The famous genius playboy having a heart failure due to a close-up scene? Comical.
“Stark! We need you down here; stop flirting!” The infamous archer was heard out of breath—it was obvious he was increasingly becoming pissed off with each passing second that the tech genius wasn’t moving to help annihilate those utterly ugly aliens—cutting Tony’s reverie short. Oh right, he thought; there’s still a job to do, then he sighs.
“Heard ya, Legolas. On it.” And of course he had to play it cool; he has a persona to maintain.
“You are one dangerous distraction.” Now Tony’s speaking to you, prior thoughts suddenly out of the metaphorical mental window.
You blinked, eyes darting from left to right as if looking for an imaginary audience-slash-person he could’ve been talking to, with a sole brow raised in judgment, ‘cause it’s most certainly not you. You think. “…I’m not even doing anything.” Well, as far as you’re aware, that is.
“Sure. Stay here—wait for me to come get you out.” Then Tony’s gently lowering you to the ground while briefly killing his firepower to—well—safely escort you over the chaos-less part of the NYC rooftop. If you weren’t actively thinking you’d gone clinically insane, you would’ve gawked at the view. Too bad then, maybe next time.
“This is literally a thirty-story building; how would I even get out?” Well, no need to point out the obvious, is there?
“Tough crowd. See you later, smarty pants.”
“Wha—hey!”
And with that, he flew away; only the sounds of his engine blasting to life served as a memory that he really was there, and honestly? Big respect. He didn’t let anything get in the way of world peace—or whatever the hell that quote meant. All you knew was that whoever made it did not account for aliens manifesting in terms of black holes and causing havoc on Earth, specifically in NYC—but what do you know? Technically, you’re also an alien by default. Just… more human-ish and mildly pathetic.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱༒︎ • ༒︎⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆
“Okay, great. Totally awesome. Let’s see what we’ve gathered so far—uhm—I’m alone; that much is obvious. Did I die, or have I gone clinically insane? The latter part seems more accurate to me. And—eugh—why am I monologuing verbally? Am I crazy? What if there are cctvs and I’m fuckin’ blowing off my shit? This is crazy. Totally crazy. God, I’m doing it again!”
You were rambling.
One moment, you were spouting just a few words of nonsense; then the next, you were reciting essays like sonnets if they had a midlife crisis—which is fucking insane to think about ‘cause you weren’t even nearing midlife yet! God, just thinking about timeline hopping is making you go insane (read: if you weren’t already; refer to statement of the problem numbers two and one, respectively), because that would mean there is an off chance that this wasn’t in the movies—you have zero idea what the premise of this tomfoolery will be—zero. So, you need a plan. Stat.
“Okayokayokay, I need a fuckin’ chalk—or like, a rock that's chalk-adjacent. Need’ta plan this shit out if I wanna stay alive during this whole fuckin’ catastrophe.” Whispering to yourself, keeping your volume in mind, you circled the vicinity—trying to find something to write your short-term plan (preferably on paper, but the ground will do—after all, beggars can’t be choosers). “Okay, found one—okay no, I think that's a carcass, ew fuck. Nevermind.”
Safe to say, you’re positively traumatized.
“Okay, well, I guess we’re going verbal.” You scoffed, gave up on finding something to write with, and just plopped down like a sad piece of puddle. “H-one is either I’ve gone insane—which, actually, isn’t so far-fetched, now that I’m thinking about it. I mean, I did forget my name—which is a crazy thing to think about, actually. And saw some aliens.” You shivered at the thought—an actual, full-body shiver while reminiscing about those damned gooey guts crammed into your memory.
“Fuck those aliens, man. Negative ten outta ten, would never want to experience that ever again.”
Shaking your head to disperse your bittersweet thoughts, the droplets of rain descending from the sky seemed to share the same sentiment. The weather was uncertain; light droplets turned into heavy rainfall, then changed into something mellow—as if knowing how you felt and sharing the same burden with you so you could feel less alone—all in a span of ten minutes (more or less). Precisely like your mood.
“Or maybe this is an incredibly orchestrated dream sequence simulation? It would explain the… marks?” Muttering, you stared blankly at the symbol magically engraved on your left hand thenar with profound confusion.
“Fuck, exactly like Jumanji. Maybe this is like—a promo for Jumanji 3, but the Avengers Edition?” Sweeping your hair out of your face, you closed your eyes, letting the cold caress of the rain soak you. With everything that happened in the past hour, it was the only thing that felt real.
“This is why I shouldn’t be left alone.” The words slipped before you realized, yet it’s something that sits so heavily. Because in truth, what really did happen to you? God, that was phrased so nostalgically, but you really can’t understand. Your mind just refuses to.
What happened and why were you… here? Wherever ‘here’ was.
Because you don’t remember dying. If you did, you would’ve remembered the phantom pain of being killed once.
You don’t remember being admitted to a psychiatric hospital. If you did, what would happen to your poor siamese kitten?
You don’t remember shifting realities. If you did, then what the fuck. Why this world—specifically?
So really, what did happen?
And, god-fucking damnit, what year was it??
Most importantly, what timeline were you in?
Then, you heard a voice. A smooth, sultry voice that you want nothing more than to ignore. “Would you like me to change that?” He was behind you, and you couldn’t be bothered to look. If you did, then you would’ve looked pathetic and god, you’d rather not have that first impression again.
“Shush, I’m trying to concentrate.”
The man chuckled, “I’m pretty certain that is not how you talk to a God,” or God, rather, as he so graciously dubbed himself.
“What god—oh.” Then you turned around—each passing millisecond making you regret why your body was too curious and decided to take a peek before consulting with your brain.
“Hello, mortal.” The God chuckled in mirth, mischievousness and smugness radiating off him, as a familiar signature smirk made you step back subconsciously.
“Oh. Oh no. This can't be great.” Impulsiveness would be the death of you—if you weren’t certain then, then you’re quite frankly certain now.
“Say, what do you think about a change in scenery?” He asked, giving you the illusion of a choice. You might be inquisitive, but you are not stupid—anything but, actually.
“I precisely think I shouldn’t.” Using your peripherals, you briefly considered jumping off the roof, but seeing a door slightly left ajar, you quickly decided that it would be the less fun but obvious option.
Except, before you even had the chance to have your thought process formulate…
“Wonderful. Not like you have a choice.”
The God of Mischief had already appeared right beside you, grabbing hold of your forearm so you couldn’t do as much as move an inch.
“Haha… what?” You chuckled nervously, sharply staring at where his hand was—traces of green coating his silhouette; a wave of impending doom filled your gut.
did you enjoy this transition chapter? what about being kidnapped TWICE?? i mean that's gotta be a record, rightttt?
divas i’m back!! originally, my leon fic was gonna be posted prior to this baby ‘cause i got tew tired by the amount of kids asking for updates (yes, you’re automatically a kid in my dictionary if you keep asking for ud even if there’s a tag that specifically says i’m shit w time n’ ass with ud—i mean, it’s repetitive and it really gets to a point), but then i remember that there were also various people who had shown their love and support and even written a paragraph of how much they enjoyed it! so then i thought, it’s unfair for those beautiful amazing wonderful divas who understand the concept of fic writing and that it takes time, effort, energy, and toooooons of willpower to write one, so you better thank them for this! you’ve been nothing but kind and supportive, and i truly appreciate you for that! i’ve been hit with the absolute worst case of writers’ block and i’ve had to get myself comfortable with the fact that i can’t always write whenever i want ‘cause inspiration is such a beautiful and awful thing to be slave to—so that’s why i kinda struggle sometimes ‘cause words don’t flow as they normally do.
anyways, enuff abt personal me thing—i’m really super excited to introduce spidey! maybe he’ll cameo on the next chapter, maybe another new character will… that purely depends on my very unpredictable brain eughh. (but personally, i'm excited to see natasha eufff, it's not her time yet, i'm afraid)
AS ALWAYS, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE SUPPORT AND LOVE!! thank you for loving this crackfic as much as i doooo!! (as always, rbs n comms for kisses—i read every single one! ily you amazing beautiful creative divas!)
Marvel Rivals Characters: do they grunt, moan, whimper, or pant?
MDNI
Grunts: Black Widow, Blade, Dare Devil, Hawkeye, Iron Fist, *Moon Knight, Punisher, Thing, Venom, Wolverine, Hulk
"oh yeah baby, just like that," they murmur in your ear, praise spoken just for you to hear. "you feel so good right now, keep doing exactly what you're doing." a low grunt pulls from their chest and their eyes squeeze shut in concentration. "fuck, you're gonna make me cum baby. You're making it really hard to hold out for you".
Moans: Angela, Captain America, Doctor Strange, Elsa Bloodstone, Emma Frost, Hela, Invisible Woman, Loki, Magik, Mantis, *Moon Knight, Phoenix, Rouge, Scarlet Witch, Star Lord, Thor
"yeahh just like that baby, just like that." another heavenly moan tumbles from their lips, you swore you could finish just from that sound alone. "come on, i wanna cum with you, you look so good when you do"
Whimpers: Dagger, Deadpool, Human Torch, Luna Snow, *Moon Knight, Namor, Spider-Man, Squirrel Girl
"oh my god, oh my god" they whimper out loudly, anyone around could surely hear them by now. "you feel so good, so good. i can't- baby i'm gonna cum"
Pants: Adam Warlock, Black Cat, Black Panther, Cloak, Cyclops, Gambit, Iron Man, Magneto, Mister Fantastic, *Moon Knight, Psylocke, Storm, **Ultron, White Fox, Winter Soldier
"fuck- hey, you doing good? yeah? good," they tuck their face into the crook of your neck, grazing their teeth over your skin. they pant as if they can't get enough breath, their body fighting against the need for air and the intensity of their pleasure. "shit i'm so close, are close too?"
*His different alters do different things
**the "panting" is the sound of his fans running on high. no I do not care it's ooc
