Kim Taehyung x female reader
Being in a relationship should be a fun and exciting time. Spending time with your significant other trying to get to know them to a point where it‘s easy to communicate and be open about your feelings without being afraid of the outcome. It gets even harder when you're in a relationship you can't name. Are we together or not. When we‘re alone we act like most couples spending every possible second together, trying to get to know each other and enjoying each others presence. But when we‘re in public we‘re distant and estranged. The fact that the guy I‘m talking about is one of the most handsome and mysterious man in town makes it even more difficult . He owns a bar to be specific the most visited and famous one in seoul.
I first met him as a costumer. My sister, cousin and I decided to go out for some drinks, after a tiring and busy workweek. The famous "Purple Bar" was the perfect place to end the stressful and nerve-wracking working day. The bar was huge and full with people having fun enjoying themselves living without a worry even when it‘s just temporary. Suddenly I noticed a handsome man behind the barrier with the most beautiful face, brown eyes that looked like they lived thousands of lifes, cheerful and sad at the same time, beautiful lips making me wonder how breathtaking they would look formed into a smile, thick black hair to round of it’s perfection. He was wearing just a simple black shirt with jeans and I never knew that simplicity could fit a man this good. I just couldn‘t take my eyes of this mysterious man with an aura that could captivate everyone, even in a room with thousand of models and celebrities. In my 23 years of living in this world I couldn’t figure out how the man of my dreams looked like, but it changed the second I laid my eyes on him. Little did I know that I also had all his attention the moment I entered the bar. I was just his type, you fascinated him and he was positive that he wanted to know you better. Normally he’s not the person to show interest when he finds someone attractive it‘s against his personal rules. Tae was cold, not talkative, secretive and even a little bit shy, never letting anybody know what he thought or felt, but with you it was something else. For the first time in a long time he wanted to show someone something of himself, even if it was just glance. All he wanted in this moment was you to know that you had his all his attention.
He caught me checking him out and looked me straight in the eyes not even thinking about breaking the eye contact. It nearly took my breath away, I felt a wave of emotions I never even knew I had inside of me. This is why I felt goosebumps all over my body, his glance felt warm yet cold, fimilar yet unknown, thrilling yet hesitant, interested yet indifferent. I just couldn‘t keep my finger on it what I felt the moment his eyes met mine. Tae wasn’t even thinking about breaking eye contact, but you couldn’t keep up with the emotions and turned your face away leaving him slightly sad. It felt strange thinking that this man I felt attracted to the second I saw, could be possibly interested in me, eventough there are so many beautiful breathtaking girls in here.
Normally Taehyung hated being a waiter and taking orders, but he wanted to be close to you and start a conversation with you, even when it comes to ordering drinks. He mostly lets his employees wait tables, that's why all his colleagues gave him funny looks when he took all his courage to approach your table. Actually it was easier to take the order between the two girls, but he made a detour to be between you and your sister, to be closer to you. „Hello girls, do you know what you like to order or do you still need some time?“ He asked in a honeyed rapsy voice giving me thousands of butterflies. Surprisingly his voice was full of self-confidence but I couldn't hear a hint of arrogance. He did his best not to look at you for too long, but he couldn't resist a fleeting glance in your direction.
I tried my best not to look, the emotions I felt were so strong it felt like my feelings of attraction and nervousness were written all over my face. It felt like he could see right through my soul with just one look. The thing I hate most is feeling vulnerable, so I gave my best to make it look like it‘s nothing. „Hey, we would like to order two Cosmopolitan and one Mojito please.“ my cousin said. „Sure two Cosmopolitan and one Mojito.“ he said taking the order and leaving to go to the barrier. Gosh I never knew that I was holding my breath for so long, I could hear my heartbeat so loud and clear, like it was about to explode. „Y/N get yourself together you don‘t even know him.“ I thought to myself wondering what my body is trying to tell me with this reaction of just being close to him.
„Did you saw this handsome waiter checking out our Y/Nie. On the way to the barrier he turned around at least twice and you said that you‘re too tired to go out, you should listen to me more often.“ my little sister said taking a sip of her Mojito while she funny wrinkled her eyebrows hitting me lightly with her elbow. „He’s totally not checking me out, I mean why would he? Could you stop looking, gosh that‘s so embarrassing.“ I begged and laughed because of her vibrant energy that lifts my mood everytime. „Yes, sure I’m going to stop looking, when he stops checking you out, but I don’t think that this is going to happen anytime soon. So I’m really sorry but nope it’s not going to happen.“ she said while quickly sticking her tongue out. „Gosh my little sister is going to be the cause of my death one day, mark my words.“ I said while lightly hitting her leg. I looked his way and I caught him lookin at me slightly smiling. Again the moment our eyes met felt like a fresh needed breeze in this hot and dry summer night.
Between all the chatting and having fun with my girls i found out that he was the owner of the „Purple Bar“. I was fascinated by him and his ability to make it all look so easy, although this success must have involved blood, sweat, nerves and endless sleepless nights in such a young age to get here were he was today. Maybe that's the reason why his eyes radiate wisdom and calmness.
It didn't take long before the "Purple Bar" became our regular place, where we went almost every weekend. The atomosphere and the way this place made you forget about any worry in this world, were a reason why you just felt welcome and comfortable. The fact that I could see Taehyung was a bonus I just couldn‘t resist. Since the night we first met, he made sure that we would see each other again the next day or next week. „This night is on me, next time you can invite me for a beer.“ He said when we asked for the bill, giving me an assuring look. „No, we don‘t feel comfortable to leave without paying we had many drinks and that‘s not fair.“ I said for the first time looking in his beautiful eyes. That was the first time he heard your voice and he was enchanted. Your voice was fragile but also sweet and confident at the same time. „Then don‘t leave.“ Tae said surprised with himself, that he spoke his thoughts loud enough for me to hear. „What did you say, I couldn‘t unterstand it.“ I answered thinking that I just misheard something. „Oh nothing.“ he said clearly embarrassed. „Damn what the hell is wrong with me. Gosh I don‘t even know her and I‘m making a fool out of myself.“ he thought that he is loosing his mind, with her this close. „You and your girls had a good time. That‘s most important for me, no money in the world can replace that. So please do me a favor and leave it like this.“ He said looking directly in my eyes with a strong voice not really leaving room for discussion. „We really had a good time, thank you for everything. I think we‘re going to take your offer and invite you for a beer the next time.“ my sister said smiling lightly. Every time we were there, he made us a place next to the barrier to keep an eye on us, so that no one could spoil our mood and we felt comfortable. He always took our order and at some point his employees knew that they shouldn't serve our table. It was his opportunity to interact with you and he wouldn‘t let that chance go to waste. Tae is a very kind, fair and chilled boss, but his employees knew he had some weak points. If they respect them, nothing can go wrong with him. The employees quickly realized he had a soft spot for you and that they shouldn’t mess with the guy who pays their rent. The way his mood always got better even if everything went wrong all day, he felt his mood lift up the moment he sees your beautiful face at the „Purple Bar“. He had a clue that his colleagues were showing their best side infront of you and he couldn‘t be happier.
Soon he asked me for my telephone number and I gladly gave it to him feeling on cloud nine. It was really hard at first to match our schedules, because at daytime I was working. His working hours began at 8 p.m. that‘s the time when the bar was filled. For a matter of fact he was working 24/7 and being self-employed wasn’t easy, he made the preparations for opening because he trusted no one as much as himself, so we had even less time to ourselves. At first I didn't care, I just wanted to be with him as much as I could and get to know him better. When we were alone it was almost perfect, but I still felt nervous around him. How couldn’t i feel this way, when everything I ever wanted in a man was flesh and blood in front of me. Taehyung was always attentive and knew exactly when to say what. Somehow he had the gift of reading me like an open book and being able to read my every wish from my eyes. The calmness and serenity he brought with him, was exactly what i had missed in my life all these years. I am a very spirited and hot-blooded person, but with him I found the inner peace that I never knew that I need. When I boiled-up with all my worries and built up emotions, his assuring words were like a chill that could calm me down. Whenever I was restless, his arms were the only place I found myself again. Nonetheless he was always a really cold and withdrawn person, he built his walls so high, it felt impossible for me to even take a glance, to know what kind of person he is, what he felt inside his mind and heart. Whenever I was in the bar, he kind of made me feel like we didn't belong together, like we weren't as far along as i thought we were. I felt disappointed, insecure and not worthy of being in a relationship with him. In public Taehyung wasn’t the man i was so fond of. Yes, every now and then he made sure that everything is alright and that I felt comfortable. He never officially asked me out, we never really never talked about it and I never brought this topic up. Sometimes he gave me glances to make sure everything was alright between us. Just to make sure that I know that he only has eyes for me. The eye contact we shared were so captivating and magical, making me forget everything around me and even the fact that he hurt me deeply with that kind of behavior. He‘s eyes told me more than thousands words.
Here we are now six months later, me being trapped in the same wheel for months with no way out in sight. The last couple of weeks my doubts and insecurities about this relationship grew so strong, that I‘m not able to ignore them anymore. I‘m overthinking every decision, conversation and moment I spent with him. Actually I‘m not really sure for how long I‘m going to keep up with this ups and downs, with his closeness just to feel empty and drained out the next day. Hell, I really like him, but i don’t think that I like him that much to put my wellbeing in the second place. In order to be in a healthy and happy relationship, you need to be in tune with your self. This so called relationship is too low key for me and I can‘t cope with this situation. I feel like I‘m not good enough for him, not worthy, not beautiful or smart enough to be introduce as his girlfriend. It‘s unbelievable how a man could break down my self-esteem with his cold behavior. I‘m so mad at myself how I gave him the power, to make me feel this way. Simply this whole thing isn‘t for me, I‘m not the person who can switch from warm compassionate, to a coldhearted human within seconds. Honestly, I don‘t even want to be like this and I‘m not going to change for worse for him.
At this point I was really pissed and disappointed, how I could bring myself in this kind of situation. The fact that Taehyung is taking really long to take a simple order of four breathtaking girls isn‘t making this situation easier for me. „Ohh our Mr. Always Grumpy who doesn‘t like to wait tables, can be a social butterfly, a new side of him I never saw coming“ I thought utterly pissed when I saw him giving them a small smile. „Woow, so the show just started, he‘s even leaning to the blonde curly hair girl, showing what‘s on the menu, is she really blind and not able to read or are they unconditionally trying to irritate the hell out of me.“ I thought while crossing my arms. They totally were checking him out and whispering, when he left the table with the orders. Is he stupid or totally delusional, not seeing the way the blonde girl was clearly trying to flirt with him, by asking him unnecessary questions, just to draw his attention. Maybe this is one of the reasons, why he doesn‘t want to make it official, to be available for other girls. He‘s attractive, young and rich, maybe the last thing he needs right now is a girlfriend. Normally I‘m not jealous, but the bad thoughts that I collected for weeks mixed with this blonde girl, are a deadly combination. God knows how hard I‘m trying to keep my cool and not explode at the moment. He looked at me as he made his way to the table with the tray of cocktails in hand. Immediately he noticed something was wrong with me as i rolled my eyes and looked away with my arms crossed. After he put the drinks down on the table, he made his way towards me with a slighly confused look. „Why are you looking at me like that? Don‘t look at me so angry.“ He says half joking. „How about you don‘t do things, that make me want to glare at you?“ I say with a strong and clearly mad voice, he never heard me talk to him like this, he never saw this side of you. Right before he was about to ask what you meant by that, he was interrupted by one of his employees, because he needed his help. He left feeling utterly confused and actually impressed. Honestly Taehyung isn‘t the type to talk much, that’s the reason he listens attentively. Being conscious of every gesture and facial expression you made. You are an open book for him, but at the same time he can‘t figure you out. Sometimes it‘s really difficult but he wouldn‘t want to change it for the world.
„I should go now, I’m not feeling very well and the last thing I want to do is spoil your mood.“ I said to my girls and waved them goodbye. I put on my warm beige fur coat and got into the the cold and windy air.
Not even two minute passed and he came out looking confused and the pissed of look couldn‘t go unnoticed by me. „First of all what the fuck do you think you are doing right now, leaving without saying a word and secondly, do you really think I let you go home alone at this time?“ he said with a stern voice.
Part 2 FINAL
Kim Taehyung x female reader
He didn't have time to get his winter jacket, when he didn't see you at your place he stormed ou