Sideswipe x Sideburn Headcanons
I got stupidly attached to this ship that only me and like 3 other people like, but it's fine bcuz I can make all the content I need for it
(I'm only halfway through season 1. Bear with me here)
Sideburn actually DOES appear as a cameo in the aligned continuity, so I DO have stuff to work with here :DDD. In this version; him and the other Autobot brothers (X-Brawn and Prowl) spent time on Cybertron hunting down Predacons but they ended up being sent to Earth to capture some of the Predacons there, as well as some other escaped Decepticons. Their main base is in Japan and, like the Rescue Bots, they're secret, so Bee's team doesn't know about them until later
At some point, the Autobot brothers get sent to Nevada (I think RID2015 takes place there) to track down a Predacon. The three go there separate ways to patrol the area and look for the predacon. Sideburn does that for about 10 minutes before he gets bored and starts driving off and doing his own thing (it's Prowl's fault for not going with him to make sure he does his job ✋️🙄)
The two met on the road. Sideswipe was on watch for the same predacon that the Autobot brothers were after. Sideburn, being the hormonal bot that he is, immediately saw Sideswipe and started flirting with him, not knowing that it was another Cybertronian. Sideswipe was EXTREMELY confused bcuz he thought it was a human in the car and was just like, "🤨🤨😟😟" (his cameo in Rescue Bots reveals that he thinks humans are creepy, lol. This interaction here isn't helping)
Eventually, he sees the Autobot logo on Sideburn and realizes that the car is a Cybertronian. He transforms and asks who Sideburn is and where he came from (more curious than accusatory). Sideburn does a full stop out of shock before transforming and being super excited that the car he was flirting with was ACTUALLY sentient this time
Sideburn continues flirting and asks Sideswipe out. Sideswipe is amused and lowkey into it (he's arrogant and seems the type to like it when people have crushes on him), but he says that he can't because he's hunting down a predacon. Sideburn tells him that they're hunting down the same predacon, and they decide to team up.
Sideburn asks if they catch the Predacon if it means he'll go on a date with him and Sideswipe just laughs and says "maybe."
The rest of Team Bee meet X-Brawn and Prowl at some point during all of this and have their own B plot where they're also hunting down the Predacon and Strongarm is being a Prowl fangirl, but that's not the focus right now 🤫🤫🤫
Sideswipe and Sideburn bond as they look for the decepticon and also have really gross flirting that would make Strongarm yell at them to "GET A GARAGE!" if she was there. Sideswipe doesn't know how to react to Sideburn's obnoxious flirting, but he tries really hard to be cool and match his energy
It'd be funny if Bumblebee coms Sideswipe to see how he's doing and after he tells him what's going on, he goes back to flirting with Sideburn but he forgot to hang up and Bee's just like, "I'm still here btw 😐" and Sideswipe is just like "😶" and quickly hangs up
Blah blah blah, other episode stuff, Sideswipe and Sideburn team up and defeat the Predacon together. Basic stuff where Bee team says goodbye to the Autobot brothers. Sideburn slides in and is like, "Sooo... about what you agreed on..." and Sideswipe says that they can go out next time. Sideburn is extremely happy and excited bcuz this is the first time someone has liked him back
THANK YOU TO "THE BUZZ ON WINDBLADE" FOR SHOWING ME WHAT SIDESWIPE IS LIKE WHEN HE HAS A CRUSH <33333
When they first go out, despite their bravado when they first met, both Sideburn and Sideswipe are incredibly nervous. This is the first time Sideburn was successful in actually getting a date, and this is also Sideswipe's first date. They manage to loosen up though and they have a lot of fun
A lot of their dates include racing or dancing (not slow dancing. Club dancing)
They're rebellious teenagers in their first relationship so they really fit the vibes of "Young, dumb, and in love." First relationship so they're dramatic about everything, giggle and kick their feet when comming each other, sneaking off to go make out, etc, etc
Sideswipe likes to show off a lot to Sideburn. Sideburn EATS IT UP every time
Love languages are fake and were made by a guy who wanted to force his wife to do chores for him and have sex with him, but Sideburn's love language is 100% words of affirmation. Sideswipe is really flattered by this and gets flustered really easily from it, but he hides it by laughing and trying to flirt back
Sideburn is really touchy with Swipey and will do things like walk his fingers up his arms or chestplate
When the two became exclusive, Sideburn still chatted up red Earth cars bcuz he knew they wouldn't respond. If they were somehow revealed to be Cybertronian, he'd be like, "Sorry, I'm already going out with a sexy red sports car :/"
Sideburn is completely smitten and tells Prowl and X-Brawn all about Sideswipe
Despite Sideswipe and Sideburn having really gross flirting in public that makes this show almost become PG instead of G, Sideswipe still has the AUDACITY to make a gagging motion anytime Bee and Blades so much as SMILE at each other in public
