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When did I become so numb

When did I lose myself

All the words that leave my tongue feel like they came from someone else

Where is the real me

I'm lost, and it kills me inside

When did I become so cold

When did I become ashamed

I'm scared to live but I'm scared to die

I'm paralyzed

I'm in a box, but I’m the one who locked me in Suffocating and I'm running out of oxygen

I'm paralyzed

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There are so many things about Ben Solo we will maybe never see on screen. His past is crazy. His whole internal struggle is crazy. And that's why I love him. Because he's not crazy. He is not his suffering. He is trying everything he can to find some kind of sense in his life~ and I fight everyone (except internet crazies who are actually crazy) that brushes off all his character context just to claim him as 'weak', 'crybaby', and so on. I wonder when the last time was that he was actually happy...

SAVE BEN SOLO! somebody, anybody. I just want to see him smile.

That's all for my broody, angsty, fangirl post. Thank-you for coming to my TedTalk. BTW this pic is my life: