▎and something tells me you're not better now . i'm sorry i couldn't help but i'm so glad i made it out . ▎
so what came first ? the mold you so desperate tried to fit into ? the comparisons ? your father had always been a cruel man and sometimes subtley so but nothing cut quite as deep as the comparison between yourself and your brother . maybe he hadn't always been the shining example of walking along the straight and narrow path but it had always been clear that your father had more hop for him than he had for you . so when did it change ? when did all the pieces of you that you still made you soft and kind among all the violence crumble away ? when did you burn only to rise out of the ashes as a more hardened burden of yourself ? you eventually turned your back on your father and brother and , hell , maybe even god . you still came around , though . you were there for the holiday dinners . for when your brother got married and had children . for the birthdays and the anniversaries . but if you were being honest with yourself, you knew you weren't there out of care . you were there out of obligation . family is family after all . even if you hate them .
