#calum bb

[simpracha]

Gas Money (Calum) PT 1

Requested: No

Summary: Being a server can be boring but you are more excited to leave work that day and head on your way to 5SOS concert, as a treat to yourself. So why does your last table of the night stop that?

Warnings: some cursing. Really cute shit tho. A fluffy love story. Alcohol mentions

Word count: 2.7k

A/N: So i work at Olive Garden and I remember Michael's tweet about olive garden and it inspired this.

MASTERLIST

"Hey, I just sat you again. A four top. It'll be your last table of the night and then we will phase you out," the hostess told me and I groaned and left the servers station where I was enjoying a small break and drinking some water. "Don't worry, you'll like them. They seem nice," she updated the floor plan and I quickly went over to the table in my section. They were sitting in a booth in a dark corner of the restaurant. I rolled my eyes, they were either influencers or addicts to have requested a dark table. I did not have the energy to deal with gluten-free diets and low sugar martinis. "Hello, my name is Y/N, and I will be your server today. Can I start you guys off with some calamari or house Moscato?" I didn't look up at them, keeping my head down. "Oooh, yeah. Calamari sounds great, miss," a recognizable deep voice said and I looked up at the table and actually got to see who my guests were and my jaw dropped. "Oh. My. Gosh," I struggled to catch my breath and the four boys laughed at me, "5 Seconds of Summer. What are you doing here? And at Olive Garden, especially." "We're passing through on our way to Nashville and Michael here," Ashton spoke from his place closest to me, on the edge of the table. Michael sat beside him and on the other side, Luke was in the farthest back corner with Calum on his outer edge, "Michael loves Olive Garden."

"Hell, yeah. I need some spinach dip as well, please, Y/N. And that confetti wine thing y'all got. It's so good!" Michael gushed, "God, I love this place. It's nice but no pressure." "Yeah, that's why I love working here," I smiled, "For the rest of you boys?" "What are your drink recommendations?" Calum said and I felt my face flush deep. To say he was my celebrity crush was an understatement. He was my celebrity dream filled with cotton candy clouds and oceans made of marmalade and sweet sugar seaweed. "Um, I, um. Do you like things sweet or strong?" I asked, knowing my words were falling over another and there was no part of me I could fix. Calum acted as if he was thinking about it then looked me up and down, "Make it just like you. Surprise me." "Um, okay, I will." I took down Luke and Ashton's orders and then went to go get them, the hostess bumping into me on her way there. "You're welcome, y/n," she said and I hugged her before heading to get their food and drinks. For Calum, I decided on making something myself for him. A concoction I learned a while ago from a bartender friend and definitely both sweet yet tangy with lemon twist and a spritz ginger and a base of a hard liquor flavored with sour apple and sugar on the rim. I didn't price it for him, just saying he got a simple shot instead. I plated everything then  took it to their table. "Okay so we have a choose your own sampler of calamari and spinach dip with confetti wine, a smooth Chianti, one blue moon, and a special drink for Mr. Hood," I sat everything on the table, "Are you guys ready or do you need more time?" "More time but stand here because we do have questions," Ashton blurted out then backtracked, "If you're not busy that is." "Oh, no. You guys are my last table of the night then I will actually be on the road to Nashville for your concert," I giggled at the admission to that, "I bought my tickets way back when it first went on sale, even a soundcheck experience. I'm pretty excited about No Shame. It's an amazing album." "Thank you. We try to do better each time," Luke smiled and took a sip of his wine, "Oh, this is great." "Thanks it's a house specialty. Any questions?" "Wait," Calum held up a finger, dragging everyone’s attention to him and picking up the glass, "It looks really fruity." The drink came out out a pretty yellow color, my favorite color, "It's my favorite color. Go ahead and taste it." "I bet its pineapple," Michael said, "Like tropical?" "Taste it and see, mate," Luke hit his shoulder and Calum rolled his eyes, took a sip, and his eyes opened wide as hell. "Sour as hell," Calum laughed, "Yet a sweet aftertaste." "It's my own creation, I call it the Sour Patch obviously," I joked and Michael laughed. Calum nodded, giving me his approval. "How is your salmon?" Ashton asked, looking up at me with those sweet honey green tea eyes. Wow, he really did look like the cutest pool in real life. "Do you like nice things?" "Yes." "Then the salmon is for you. It's herb encrusted and comes with garlic mashed potatoes," I pulled out my notepad with one swift movement, "Huge recommend." "I'll get that then," Ashton smiled up at me and if I wasn't such a Calum girl, I would fall apart under his gaze. How do Ashton girls survive? "I think I want the ravioli?" Luke said and Michael started laughing loudly, "Ravioli, ravioli, give me the formioli!" The table erupt into laughs and I shook my head taking down his order. I heard that joke so much each day, I'm over it. "I'll have the egglant parm with zoodles," Michael chose a vegan option and I jotted it down, turning to Calum, "And for you, sir?" "Oh, girls usually don't call me sir unless in bed," Calum joked cheekily and I rolled my eyes. "You're lucky you're cute or else I'd have your server switched for that comment." "Am I not allowed to flirt with you?" "I am working, sir," that time I said it purposefully and with a wink, "I am a Calum girl...but I like to keep my source of income. What would it be?" "What's your favorite meal here?" "The chicken margherita, sir," I guessed where he was going with that and wrote his order down. I then grabbed their menus, "I'll be back with salad and bread sticks shortly." I turned to leave but not before hearing a loud whisper from Michael, "Yo dude, you just flirted with the waitress. Since when do you flirt anymore?"

"Alright, boys, is this going to be together or separate?" I smiled up at them as I started messing around with the ziosk. "Eh, make it separate. I don't like these lads all that," Luke said and I laughed pulling up his check on the screen and slid it over to him. I let them all pay and then gave it to Calum, "Okay, just do the same as them, swipe your card, adjust your tip amount and then sign." "Alright, miss," Calum said and then turned his screen to me, adjusted his tip amount to 100% and then signed. "Sir, that's a 100% tip. Your check will be doubled." "Oh, that's certainly not enough then," Calum reached into his back pocket and pulled out a wad of 20s, "Consider it gas money." "We'll see you later, Cal," Michael said and the other boys scooted out leaving me with Calum. More confusion came to mind at whatever plan that I missed. "Gas money," I repeated not fully comprehending and Calum nodded, taking time to smile up at me and let his eyes wonder across my face and take it in. I kind of liked it, "For why?" "I have a question for you," Calum said with a smile, "Will you say yes?" "Depends." "So, driving on a tour bus for months with multiple smelly teenage boys is terrible, yeah?" "I do have brothers so I can imagine." "How would you feel if I drove these next couple hours alongside you? We're both headed to the same place, why not carpool?" Calum said, standing then. I realized just how much taller than me he was to me like this and the fact that I got to look up at him was amazing. "Carpooling isn't four hours long," I couldn't really process what this gorgeous man was asking me. He wanted to stay in a car. With some girl he just met. For four hours. "I know it sounds crazy but, I got gas and snack money," Calum giggled, "It will be fun. I'm great at carpool karaoke." I stopped and thought about it for a second. Weighing the pros and cons.

Pros: Calum Hood. Cons: I just met Calum Hood.

Pros: I don't have to pay anything Cons: I'm a strong independent woman who don't need no man.

Pros: that man is Calum Thomas Hood. Cons: I am the worst flirt

Pros: he wants to hang out with me Cons: i don't even want to hang out with me.

"Hello, earth to y/n," Calum waved in front of my face, snapping me out of my face. Just from that movement I saw his hands in my face, perfectly made and covered in tattoos. And I wanted that hand everywhere. Yeah, I've decided. "Yeah, sure, just let me close out." I turned my back on him after he said he'll be waiting up front for me. What have I done?

After clocking out, I changed into my street clothes of just leggings and a hoodie so I can be comfortable driving down. Now looking at it, I sort of regretted not looking like a bad bitch on this ride since I suddenly had company. "Hey, Y/N, enjoy the concert!" my work wife called to me as I left and I kissed her cheek before leaving, "Will be bringing me a souvenir, yeah?" "Yes, I will," I waved goodbye and went up front to the lobby area to see the tall Maori man looking over at me and a wave of his hand. "Hello, Y/N," he opened the door and led me out just as I saw a large van leave, "The boys just left so now you have to take me. No backing out now." "Fun," I laughed and walked over to my Kia. I saw he had a large book bag with him and popped the trunk, "Just toss it in." I got into the car and Calum did the same, "Alright, Calum, I am going to give you the aux. You better play some good shit or I will severely judge you." "Oof," Calum said, taking the Bluetooth, "Than I better pick great, huh?" "Damn right you better," I said and reversed out of the lot and to the gas station. Needed to fuel up my car, myself, and my soul before I got on this ride. I heard the sound of Don't Stop blare out through my car's speakers and just looked over at the man, "Really? Don't Stop?" "You said it better be great. It's our best song." "You think so?" I mocked him, squinting at him and scrunching up my face as he laughed that boyish laugh, "You really think so huh? Because you are RIGHT, motherfucker. Turn that shit up!" "Oh, no," Calum said, his voice in a fake panic, moving to change it and I grabbed his hand before he could. "ASK FOR YOUR NUMBER. SAID YOU DON'T HAVE A PHONE," I started screeching as I pulled into the gas station and parked at a pump. Calum was laughing his off on this side, covering his face with his other hand. I couldn't help it. It was one of the first songs by them I liked unfortunately. I do not respect Don't Stop slander. I reached for his other hand pulled his body so he was looking at me and then actually sang, "Everybody wants to take you home tonight, But I won't stop until I make you mine, SING IT CALUM." He laughed, his face crinkling around his eyes and his smile taking over his face as his body shook in laughs. It was beautiful to watch and nevertheless he sang with me, "Don't stop, doing what you're doing." "Yeah! Cause every time you walk in the room you got all eyes on you." "AND YOU KNOW IT, KNOW IT, KNOW IT," we sung together and collapsed in a laughing fit, my head knocking into his. Our heads collided like two bowling balls and I groaned at the feeling, "Fuck." Calum rubbed his head, his face skewing in pain, "Shit maybe we should stop." I giggled and rubbed my head and he moved my hand gingerly, picking it up look at where I was rubbing. I felt his breath whisper next to my ear and it took all of me not to start shuddering in chills at his proximity. His large hands rubbed gingerly at the part of my skull where our heads hit and he looked down at me, his voice soft and heavily accented as he spoke barely above a whisper, "Are you okay?" His eyes could only be described as the Underworld. As if, if I looked away I would end up falling down, down, down to never be seen again. They were so deep and on display. I wanted to stare at him forever, "Yeah. I'm okay." "Great," Calum moved away and suddenly the air around me felt cold, "I'll go get some gas and snacks. What your energy drink of choice?" "Cold brew. Black," I said and he nodded, "Respect. Like a woman who enjoys shaking from coffee." After he shut the car door and walked into the station, I hit my head against the steering wheel, trying to get my heart to stop jumping ten feet out of my chest.

It was going to be a long drive.

"Wait, so you've never left this area?" Calum asked me two hours into our drive. We spent time talking about everything around us and avoiding the deeper topic of ourselves. "I've basically stayed in the Midwest all my life till I moved here so I've never experienced a different timezone," I stated matter of factually as we passed through into another city. "Shit, I've been around the world too many times," Calum said, staring out the window, his voice going dreamily as he thought about it. "Is it tiring?" "I guess you could say that," Calum picked up his drink and took a swig of it, "A lot to get used to. Never home for as long as I would like to be and when I am, I'm bored. It's become a routine being on the road." "Yeah, I imagine," I nodded as I started to just cruise since the next hour was going to be a straight shot into Nashville, "I always wanted to travel. I think everyone does though." "That is true, it's amazing to see the world. It's much more than your own bubble," he said and I nodded. "I always wanted to see the Great Barrier Reef," I said, taking a quick glance at him. He was staring at me, fully, his eyes on me as if I was the only thing worthy of looking at. "Not to change the topic, but you're incredibly beautiful," I smiled at his compliment and rolled my eyes, "why the eye roll?" "Thanks, I am, I'm just not your type," the words came out of my mouth so matter of fact but the way the man next to me started laughing made me look over at him. "My type? What do you think my type is?" Calum said between laughs, keeping his full attention on me. "Perfect body, makes the greatest insta posts easily, perfect hair, perfect smile, probably has dreams of modeling or something, white passing or white or just not ethnic but exotic," I could have continued on but Calum was quick to interrupt. "You mean, my friends date girls like that," he said quickly, "Yeah THEY are constantly dating models. doesn't make me think any less of them. They're are different types of beautiful. And you and your skin and your hair and your smile and body are the most beautiful thing to me, y/n. Now I'm going to nap the rest of the way but I want you to know you're definitely my type. I wouldn't have did so much extra shit just to get you alone." "Calum-" "And when we get there, I want to take you out on a date."

Taglist:

@galcalirwin​

[simpracha]

Nice To Meet Ya (C.H.)

Requested: Yes. Sorry this took so long but I ran with it. Hope you enjoy!

Summary: After meeting a mysterious fan at a meet and greet, Calum Hood finds himself wanting nothing more than to get her in his bed.

Warnings: alcohol, cursing, smut, light bdsm, ice play, cumplay, submissive Calum, oral, (male receiving), some spanks, calum being called pretty

Word count: guess what bitches? I still don’t know (the writing doc i use doesnt give it to me and i’m too lazy to convert and see)

Read, reblog, enjoy!

"So here is how the meet and greet will go," one of the roadies began talking and walking us through the whole ordeal. My friends and I somehow landed meet and greet and soundcheck tickets to the 5 Seconds of Summer show and we were on a cloud of excitement.  I couldn't wait, if I'm being honest. They were one of my favorite bands ever and I couldn't wait to actually get to hug them, take some pics, and fulfill the likes of my inner fangirl. "Can you believe this?" my friend, Tasha, whispered to me and I shook my head, "I can't wait to meet Michael!" "Ah, you know I'm a total Luke girl," I said and our other friend, Angie, laughed. "What? You gonna try to steal him away from Sierra?" she laughed and we laughed with her. "Of course," I exaggerated, honestly hyping myself up, "Why wouldn't I? All I need to do is slip my number in his pocket?" "His jeans are way too tight for you to be doing that," Angie snapped right back and Tasha fell into a fit of giggles. Of course, none of this truly mattered to us like it used to. We long grew out of our "5SOS better marry us" phase all of 5SOSFam goes though. Now it's just us enjoying the music inbetween out day to day lives.

"Alright, your group is next," A lady came and ushered us over from the waiting area to the barricade where we saw the shadows of four extremely tall boys waiting in front of a screen.

They were even more beautiful in person was the only thing I noticed as we walked up. Each boy had this dazed, yet tired look on their face and were talking amongst each other. I heard Ashton's iconic giggle at something Calum had whispered to him while Luke and Michael were playing some game that involved hitting each other and fast hand motions. "We're a serious band, huh?" Angie sassed and they all turned around and went red. "We didn't know you guys would be coming in so quietly!" Michael said, his voice just a naturally loud volumne, "Come in! Bring it in!" Michael said this as he brought Tasha in for a hug and I swear she melted into his arms instantly. Angie and I went to go hug each of the boys, starting with Luke, then Michael, Ashton, then Calum. When I got to Calum, he looked down at me and smirked before bringing me in for a hug. It only got odder when I felt his lips move next to my ear and a soft whisper, "You're very beautiful." It was so faint, I was sure I didn't actually hear it.

"What's the move?" Tasha asked once the show was over. We were still buzzing on a high from seeing them. They were honestly amazing. Their vocals were insane live and honestly, we may just go again. "How about to get a drink?" Angie suggested and we all nodded. We didn't have classes tomorrow anyway, so why not live a little? "Alright, ladies," I said dramatically, "Time for Mission Wasted, do you accept?" "Ai yi, captain," the two girls said in their best pirate voices. "Alright then, laddies!" I laughed, "There's a bottle of scotch with our names on it." "Oooh, I can't."

____

There was nothing Calum liked more about after shows than the drinking parts. After most shows, Ash and him went out on the town to celebrate if they could before getting back on the tour bus. Often times, inside the city, no one recognized him so he didn't have to worry that much. The club was buzzing at it reached midnight. People were still coming in and Calum was sitting in the VIP booth watching everyone as he drunk a glass of the most expensive bourbon he could get. Women were walk naked and men were sweaty and all of them grinding against each other. Ashton clapped a hand on his shoulder, "Ay, mate, think I found a girl for tonight. I'm gonna head out." "Wear a condom," Calum responded and Ash laughed saying something along the lines of  'of course' before leaving him to his people watching. It was then after Ashton left that he saw her. She just reached the bar and she was radiant against the club lights. Calum took her in, everything about how beautiful she was. He remembered mentioning that to her at the meet and greet earlier. He felt this insane craving just by looking at this mysterious woman and knew he had to have her. "Hey," Calum called a waitress came over, "Put everything that girl orders on my tab." The waitress nodded and went to go do just that. He watched as the girl got the news of it and looked up at him. She smirked before saying something to the bartender. Whoever this girl was had huge guts because the next thing Calum knew the bartender was grabbing a bottle off the top shelf and handing it to her. She looked up at him and held up a thumbs up before disappearing into the crowd. Calum laughed, admiring her little game she was playing but knew he wasn't leaving tonight without her on his arm. He damn near ran down the stairs to where he last spotted the beautiful girl and found her walking to a booth. He followed after he composed himself. "Hello," Calum said as he walked up and saw the girl dishing out the bottle between her two other friends. She turned to him but he still got a good look at her ass. It should be a fun night. "Hey, thanks for the drinks," one of her friends giggled. She quickly shushed her and turned to Calum. God, she was gorgeous. "I was wondering if you wanted to dance," Calum asked the beautiful girl. She set her mouth in such a way and put a hand on her hip, "Look around, Calum. It's girls night. We don't leave the girls for dicks." "Yeah!" her other friend, obviously drunk already, yelled out, "Chicks before dicks!" Calum's been rejected before, no doubt. But it always stung whenever it happened. It was also frustrating. "Maybe another time. I'm the designated driver," the girl pulled him aside and slipped something in his pocket, "Be there at 2AM. No earlier." Calum smirked. She would definitely be getting punished later for this.

At 2 a.m., Calum found himself walking to the address the girl gave him. He didn't know why he was doing it, for all he knows he could have been walking towards his death but never the less he continued his ascent up the stairs to some old brownstone. He breathed out quickly before he knocked on the door. Almost scared as if this was a trap and some beefy, Chuck Norris type was going to open it and punch the daylights out of him. He repressed his worries and went ahead, lifting up his fist and knocking in a sharp succession of threes. The door swung open a second later and Calum saw the beautiful girl, now out of her dressy clothes from earlier in just a huge t-shirt, showing the expense of her legs. He looked at them, not caring that she was paying attention to him so blatantly checking her out. He wanted to travel her legs and feel every single last inch of her and her body. Wow, it must have been a long time since he fucked properly. The girl smirked at him before letting him in. The home was dark, the only light being the oven light that was turned on so Calum couldn't even get a proper look at whatever the house looked like. This should have scared him but it just added to the mystery of it all that this woman was holding him. She turned to him then and looked him in the eye before guiding him into the door of her bedroom. "I'm going to warn you now, Calum," she said, a wave of awkwardness falling over them at the pause, "I'm a dom. And I'm pretty into my sexual life with myself in control." Calum blinked. To say he was shocked would not be wrong. All throughout Calum's sex-capades, he played the part of dominating, whether soft or hardcore. He was used to woman submitting to his whole tall, dark, and handsome thing he had going on and because of that, he never really considered the fact that maybe he would ever let someone else be in control. Thinking of it,  most of the work tended to be on the dom so what he was hearing was an oppurtunity to relax and feel it all completely. "Okay." Calum smirked at the girl who immediately looked relieved at the way he was responding. She must have thought he would not want to anymore, "My safe word is octopus." "Great," the girl said before Calum felt her energy tense up, still not seeing her eyes clearly in the dark hallway before her room. She opened the door for him, "Go in there. Strip completely. Lay down. I will be in in a second." Calum went into the room, that was lit by multiple candles, casting shadows across his body. He watched the shadows play against his skin as he undressed and thought about what he was getting himself into. The girl was obviously alluding to BDSM play and one thing he did not need was pictured of himself all over the internet naked and tied up if she was fucking with him. Nevertheless, he found himself getting hard at the idea of having ride him hard and good with her hand wrapped around his throat. He laid down and only a couple seconds later, she came back in. She was naked herself now and holding a bowl that was fogging up with steam. She set it on the ground next to the edge of the bed before reaching under her bed and pulling out a pretty red box. "Are you comfortable with toys?" she asked, her voice adding layers of sexiness in the intimacy. "Some of them," Calum said, truthfully and she nodded, "I'm okay with being tied up and blindfolded but I'm not ready for the harder stuff." "That's completely understandable. I don't really dive into the hard stuff either," she smiled softly then, "So I'll go gentle for your first time like this." Calum nodded as he watched her take out a couple things then sit the box aside. The girl moved him so he was spread spider in dead center of her bed. She brought the bowl up between his legs and settled herself in between his legs. She looked almost small there from his perspective but she was larger than life completely. "I'll give you one chance for me to not tie you down. Touch anything and I'm tying you up with no mobility, understand?" "Yes, ma'am." "Good," She said and dipped a hand into her bowl. She pullde out one perfectly shaped ice cube, part of it melting. The girl, who he now realized he never got the name of, leaned her beautiful body over him, her breasts hanging directly in his vision. He wanted to touch them immediately but feared getting tied down before even getting his permissions. She took the cube and rubbed it over one of his nipples. Calum felt a chill run through him and shuddered. Her mouth came close to his nipple, giving it a gentle peck before swirling her warm tongue around the areola, collecting all of the icy wetness. Just as he was getting back comfortable with the temperatures, she rubbed the cube over both his nipples again, this time then putting another cube into her mouth as she rubbed. His nipples grew hard and the second they she blew on them, her breath coming from around the ice cube, collecting its coolness as it hit Cal's brown skin. He moaned, not knowing how she knew this would have such an effect on him. She trailed a finger around his left nipple, taking the water stain and creating a snail like trail all the way down to his navel. Calum watched her face, her mouth slightly open as she focused on that part of his body. She looked unbelievably sexy with her face fully concentrated. Calum didn't even notice that her other hand was just sitting in the bowl of ice before he realized that very hand, massaging his balls. "Holy shit," he whispered as her freezing cold touched his genitals, while her other very warm hand jacked him off, as her tongue came onto his tip, swiping across his slit and sucking him off. One hand pumping the base as she gave him and unbelievable job that had him questioning and feeling torn. He was hot and cold and horny and a little out of it. All he did know was that needed more of what she was offering. She teased him as she licked his upright dick before sitting on both her hands to warm them up. Sucking him off without use of her hands, Calum watched as she licked up and down the prominent vein in his dick before swirling her tongue around the tip of it. Calum moaned at her tongue touches, appreciating the expertise as her mouth rolled over his dick. Though she was in control, all Calum wanted was to fuck her pretty little mouth and get his cum out quicker. He couldn't even stop himself, not even thinking of the punishment, before moving his hips up to meet her mouth as she sucked him off. The girl immediately stopped at that, pushing his hips down as she sat up and looked him menacingly in the eyes, "No one told you to move, Calum." Calum stuttered his way through an apology but she was shaking her head, she crawled up the length of his body and looked the brown boy in the eyes, smirk never leaving her face. "You're going to be punished for that," she whispered, her mouth slightly stained from her lipstick getting smeared off from the blowjob, "You won't like your punishment. Or maybe you will. You'll leave here, go back on your tour, and it will drive you absolutely mad. Maybe you'll never have sex like this again. Maybe you'll be forever chasing it. But what I do tonight will stay in your mind for as long as I want it." It was almost menacing what she was saying, the threatening way of promising to always be on his mind but the thought had his dick twitching, aching, waiting. Calum was sure he wanted whatever this smokin, hot lady had to offer. Calum heard the clap of skin to skin contact before he felt it. When he did it was a stinging pain that made Calum feel the epitome of the color bright red, which was what he was positively sure was the color of his skin. He blinked twice, making sure that actually happened. She spanked him! The side of his ass was being massaged by her who shook her head, disappointment etched across her face, "You have to answer me, Calum." "Yes, Ma'am." "Do you like being punished?" Calum didn't hesitate as the yes left his mouth and she chuckled, "Good. I like punishing you." Calum loved her smile. It held a certain promise of permanent intrigue. He smiled back as he watched her look over the expanse of his body. "I just want to fuck you silly," she whispered, almost so he couldn't hear, "You're just so fucking pretty, baby." Calum smiled. He'd never really been called pretty before. It was a lot different from everything he's been called before. Pretty actually made him feel well, pretty. There was something about being called it that it feel like a pink bubble was rising up his body and straight to his head. "How do you feel about cumplay?" he asked her. He barely knew how he felt about it yet he felt himself asking this woman if she wanted to. She smiled widely and nodded, "I want to cum all over your pretty face, ma'am. I want to see what you're doing to me on you." "Let's make it happen," she smirked before sliding back down his body, leaving a trail of bruised kissed before taking his dick back into her mouth. Foreplay seemed to be over as she sucked him off, one hand jacking off what couldn't fit into her mouth and the other massaging his balls, going at a pace that was near impossible for Calum to deal with as he moaned out. She got rid of all his frustrations as she alterated between kitten licking his slit and swirling her tongue around, moaning and causing vibrations as his moans turned her on. Calum felt himself shaking the closer he got to his release and hated it when her mouth popped off when he warned her. She moved to jacking him off in the direction of her face while playing with his nipples, an ice cube appearing in her hand. She moved on of his hands into her mouth, sucking on his fingers, setting Calum off with the amount of erogenous zones she was hitting that he didn't want to know what other ones she could hit. He was moaning like crazy, never really been touched like this before that he didn't end up taking control or feeling like he had to. The idea of just sitting back and being a good sub was something Calum found himself wanting more of. "Fuck!" Calum yelled out as his cum squirted out, covering her face. Her eyes were closed as the white substance covered her face. Calum couldn't help but reach out a hand and smear it evenly across his face. He didn't know whether to feel disgusted or immensely satisfied but he wanted it again. She breathed out, "Come taste yourself." He sat up and kissed her. She kissed back before pushing his mouth open and swirling her tongue around in his mouth. The woman sucked on his bottom lip, pulling it out before it snapped back into place and he moaned. Her kisses alone were almost enough for him to cum again at this point. He sucked on her tongue for a bit before she moved to wipe off her face. She laid him down and attached her lips to every sweet spot of his body, kissing and licking all over his neck, face, arms, chest. "My fangirl heart is finally complete," she giggled, leaving the cool girl persona out the door, "I could write a bombass fanfic about this." Calum laughed before pulling her down so that she was straddling him. She stopped him from moving, "Don't worry honey. I know you have a break on tour. We have all day tomorrow. We need the rest." Calum smiled, "what's your name?" "Y/N," she smirked, "Nice to meet ya."

[simpracha]

Quickie (Calum Hood)

Sex with Calum blew your mind every time. Ever since you met the boy during a drunk house party, your body has never reacted to being loved on the same. To this day, you’ll never stop fantasizing about it. It’s been months and you’ve been with other guys; after all, Calum Hood was just one drunk night in your track record, but no one held a key to how good it felt with him.

It started at the barbecue. Your friend was hosting this party to celebrate some solstice or whatever. Honestly, you felt and knew this was just some faded excuse to party but it was whatever and you were happy to go anyway. You kissed his cheek when you saw him and he introduced you to the guy he was talking to as he flipped burgers on the grill. You looked up to see the sex god himself for the first time.

Calum Hood was hotter than any tabloid picture on the press. Just being in his presence was enough to make any panties dropped. If yours weren’t secured by the fact that you had on pants, you were sure he could look at you and make them come undone.

“This is my buddy, Calum, by the way. Cal, this is the best girl on this side of the world,” your friend said with a smile, “I’ve known her since I moved you. No one knows this town like she does. Back of her hand, I swear.”

You held up your hands in defeat, “I have to admit it. I’m his godsend.”

“If only I wasn’t gay,” he laughed and kissed your head, “Calum is a musician for some famous band or something like that. He’s a cool lad. Hell of a partyer.”

“Nice. I’m glad I met ya,” you took Calum’s hand and shook it and he returned the pleasantries but looked you straight in the eye. His eyes seemed to darken as he smirked before letting your hand go.

“I’ll, um, go do a round, or something,” you stuttered through your sentence, “I’ll catch you guys, later. Maybe.”

Walking off quickly, it was hard not to turn back and look at Calum one last time. It was when you turned, you noticed he was most definitely checking your ass out. Something bold coming over you, you winked at him and blended into the party crowd.

It was around an hour before you saw him again. You were about to leave, turn in because you had work in the morning. Unlike everyone else, you had a regular job with hours unlike your mostly famous friends. You were putting on your coat when you heard him behind you.

“And where do you think you’re going without me?” Calum said and you felt his warm breath on the little hairs on your neck. Your nerves jumped at his proximity but your body tingled in excitement. You wanted him. But who wouldn’t?

This wasn’t your first rodeo. Far from it. Immediately you knew what this was. One night and that was it. But it could be an amazing story to tell one day.

“I could go lots of places, but you could come,” you smirked at the subtle pun and you felt him chuckle as his hands moved gingerly to your waist, pulling you against him.

“I don’t know if I’m drunk or if it was the way you looked at me or maybe the planets are out of wack from the solstice, but I could take you right here, right now,” Calum’s voice was gruff in your ear and you couldn’t disagree. All you wanted was to see how beautiful he was cumming or moaning in your ear. You barely even drank. Maybe the planets are out of line. All you know is that all you wanted to do was everything. Everything, everything, everything to him. And now.

“I couldn’t agree more,” you pressed your ass up against him, feeling just how hard he was for you , and just how much he was! You couldn’t wait to feel all of his length because against your ass and backside, you predicted there must be a lot to feel.

Calum looked around before dragging you into a closet. The coat closet was nearly full from the party.

Calum pulled a bunch of jackets down so y’all could fit inside and locked it from the inside after pushing you in.

“You want this, right?”

“I’d be a fool if I didn’t, Calum.”

“Then let’s do it,” his lips were on your neck in seconds, one hand pulling you closer by clenching your ass and pulling you against him while the other cupped your boobs through your clothing. You threaded your left hand through his buzzcut, dancing your index finger in circles, as your free hand clenched the back of his shirt instantly, pulling him closer. Close couldn’t get close enough because the more he latched himself to your neck’s delicate spot, the more excited you became.

His hand was slipping into your panties, testing your wetness. You shook simply at his touch of your delicate area, he chuckled and slowly swirled his index finger over your clit, causing a bunch of different sensations to rock your body as he hit the nerve endings with his gentle yet hard fingertips.

Counteractively, you moved to pull his pants down and whip out whatever he was packing. It was just as huge as you felt. Maybe even more. You got wetter just sitting there looking at it. You wrapped your hand around the base of it and starting pumping his dick up and down, every other pump getting your thumb swiping over the tip of his dick while your less dominant hand began to massage his balls in the other. He moaned and instantly became putty in your hands, just like you were in his. You two were just moaning at touching each other, foreplay already causing more than you bargained for from a quickie.

“Mm, I want to be inside of you,” Calum said, “i want to taste you. I wanna do so much to you.”

“I want it all, baby, please do it all. Right here. I don’t wanna wait,” you whined as he moved from one finger to two, and began finger fucking you, scissoring them in and out, while playing with your nipple. A pit began to grow in your stomach.

“Let me orgasm around you, Cal.” That was all he needed to here. He took out his fingers and pulled a condom out, quickly wrapped around his dick. There was no time to waste. Especially if someone wanted their jacket.

“This is still okay, right?”

“Yes, Cal. Please fuck the shit out of me.”

He entered you quick and hard, knocking your breath out. You adjusted to his size and felt him in every inch. It felt perfect, like you were a glove around him. You wrapped your legs around his waist and arms around his shoulders. As close as he could get as he rocked in and out of you.

You were soaking wet. Admittedly from the hottest guy you just met. Your head knocked back against the wall as he hit your gspot with each stroke. You wanted to count how many stars you were seeing but boy did they just multiply.

“Stay with me, baby. I want you coming with me,” he whispered in your ear, his deep voice was enough to make you cum itself.

You moved against him and soon you felt him shake as you both came together. It came in waves around you both and you moaned into each other’s shoulders. He slid out and you dripped each other’s juices out.

He slid to his knees in front of you, “Let me clean you up.”

No wonder you thought about this quickie so much.

[simpracha]

PowerPoint (CEO!Calum)

Requested?- Yes. 

Warnings: It’s just fluff. I guess you could say cursing. I can’t remember if there’s cursing in this.

Length?: A medium one. You’ll sit for a bit.

Masterlist

"Y/N, can you come in here real quick? I'm having a bit of an emergency," I heard my boss call for me from the phone's intercom in my corner office and left my office to go to his on the top floor. I worked at Hood Records as one of the marketing execs. It was a job I dreamed of my whole life and it all seemed to take the cake. Every day I got to manage and market some of the best talents in the world and it was everything I ever wanted. Especially knowing it came with a hotter than all hell boss. I knocked on his door after stepping off the elevator and Calum Hood flung it open, giving me a good look at his frazzled state. He shaved his head recently to stop it from looking so messy in these moments but I could see the bags in his eyes and the wild look he had just let you know what he was putting himself through. His shirt and tie were untucked and undone. "Good, it took you long enough," Calum said gruffly and I rolled my eyes, "We're on different floors." "Teleport," Calum said, letting me in and moved me to the desk, grabbing onto my wrist. I always loved how whenever he got excited or weary, he manhandled me.

 It was just a perk of seeing this man every day. "What is it?" I said and he just shook his pretty head, showing me his laptop screen. On it, all I saw was a bunch of coffee tables. Some glass, some wood, some plastic. All different. What even? "I don't know what kind of coffee tables to get when you move in," he smiled nervously at me, looking me in the eye and I broke out laughing at this pitiful boy. He was the absolute cutest. "Calum!" I managed to get out between laughs and he pouted, his cute full lips sticking out, knowing his puppy face was my weakness. I went and put myself in his arms and he hugged me, leaning his head on the top of mine, "That is not an emergency, bubba." "What if you hate the coffee table?" "It's hard to hate something that's purely functional." "What if it's ugly?" "Just go with wood, bubba." I said and I felt his heart stop. "Mahogany? Chestnut? Oak? Pine?" "I'll choose the table. Alright?" I lifted my head to look him in the eye and he smiled at me before moving to kiss the tip of my nose. "I was hoping you would say that. Can you also choose the new bed set, tables, and guest room lay out?" Calum said, giving me a nervous smile and I giggled. I was so in love with this boy. "Let's just hire an interior designer," I suggested and he nodded, relief flooding his face. I was glad to be the brain of us. "That could work too, thanks baby. You always make everything so much easier," Calum said, giving me a bunch of kisses all over my face. "How unprofessional!" I fake yelled, "Mr. Hood, are you trying to come onto me? In the workplace? What will people think?" He kissed me deeply after that fell out of my mouth. I was quick to kiss back, throwing my arms over his shoulders, glad I wore the heels that made me closer to do this very specific thing. He pulled away right before we went into full blown making out territory. "Is it working? Me coming onto you?" Calum said and I laughed at him, "Don't you want to know what it's like to come home with the boss man? See what its like to be with aboss." "Oh, but will your fiancee approve, Mr. Hood? I heard she loves you way too much to share," I asked him, knowing damn well it was me. I loved whenever we roleplayed like this. It was always so silly and giggly and cheered Calum up. "I think she'll be fine with it," Calum said before pulling me so close that my body was slick with his, he put one hand in mine and wrapped his free arm around my waist. "Alexa! Turn on our song." I groaned as I heard his Alexa's voice cue up Death of a Bachelor by Brandon Urie, "Calummm, I don't have the shoes to dance today." "I told you not to put them on this morning," Calum remarked. Sometimes I really hated that sass that I fell in love with, "You did this to yourself." "You did this to yourself," I mocked him and stuck my tongue out and he just licked my tongue, "Oh my god, you're so weird!" "It's only because I love you," Calum smiled down at me as he began leading the dance across his office. I knew he was trying to get me to practice our first dance as man and wife, as well. I wasn't mad at him though. I looked into his deep brown eyes and just smiled at how happy this man made me ever since I met him when I was just a fresh out of graduate school marketer, I was over was the social media division. I remember seeing him for the first time, when his father still ran the place, and he was right beside him in some gray and black suit with his curly black hair everywhere. He smiled at me when I first walked in to the marketing meeting and I smiled back not knowing that he would someday be the love of my life and I'd have a pretty diamond ring on my finger because of him. Funnily enough, he proposed in a meeting. Well, it was a sham of a meeting and all my other colleaques were in on it. I walked in to Calum having a powerpoint cue'd up for one of his newest ideas for some new artist he wanted to market alot of off and considering that was my branch, most of my colleaques and employees were there, watching. I sat through the meeting, taking notes on what Calum wanted and tried to come up with the best way to make this new DJ we signed a hit. I was forming a good plan by the third slide. On the fourth slide, there was a video diary of the relationship Calum and I held over the years. I couldn't take my eyes off of it as I watched it. I didn't want to either. Seeing Calum grow just as much as I had and all the while, I got an outsider's perspective of the love that he and I must share. I looked over at Calum, trying to figure out why he would show all of my coworkers that deeply intimate thing, until I looked around the table and saw them all holding a ring box. Each ring seemed to be more beautiful than we last. "So, I had them all pick a ring. Then I bought them all," Calum said, scratching the back of his neck, "I didn't know which one you would like more so I bought them all." "I would have liked anything you gave me, bubba," I said and quickly walking over to him. He was quick to kiss me deeply and hold me to him. I could tell just how nervous my baby was. "Please say you'll marry him and continue to make me this happy for the rest of my life," Calum said, putting his forehead to mine and pulling me closer. "If you say no," my coworker, Ashton, spoke up, "We have a pros list on all the reasons you shoulda said yes." I looked over and saw the next slide just filled with Pros for Marrying Calum Hood.

Pros: -it's Calum Hood -he's rich and famous -you've been together for over three years -you two are so happy together -you'd have the cutest babies! -calum -hood

Cons: -what's a con it's Calum motherfucking Hood?

Calum looked at me and smiled. He knew my answer as much as anyone in this room did but I knew how it must have felt to want to hear the words. "I want nothing else to be your wife."

The song ended and Calum twirled me around in a flourish. I was quick to stick the pose the choreographer taught us and he smiled. "Look at us," Calum said, "Future Mr and Mrs. Calum Hood, dancing in his city top office. She's wearing the prettiest dress he's ever seen and even though she sleeps with a retainer on..." I growled at him and he continued, "She just looks so perfect." "Is that one of the new boyband songs?" I asked and he nodded, "It's quite catchy." "People said the same thing about Herpes." "And yet, people still like it," Calum laughed at me and kissed my forehead. I would have never said no to him.

[simpracha]

Understanding (CTH)

Requested?: Yes

I just wanna say that, as a black woman, all my self inserts can easily be a black woman. I am careful to not do any race or body defining characteristics when talking about y/n bc i want people of all cultures to read and feel like themselves. With that being said, this reader is purposely black. This is my own experience as a black woman and dating though so many may not receive the same treatment or experience but I kept it as cool as possible. Also i have been in interracial relationships before so I’m also saying stuff that people said to us when we dated.

I just wanna say it’s kind of terrible that we HAVE to say “hey i want poc oc” even when its almost 2020.

Summary: Calum dates a black girl. That’s it. It’s in fact just a regular relationship.

Warnings: some racism towards the end. Drug mentions. Calum being a cute shit. Curse words.

"So, dollface, what are you doing in all of this?" I looked up from swishing around the drink in my hand, to see this beautiful brown boy in front of me. His hair was buzzed down and his eyes were a dark abyssmal brown that felt like liquid hugs. His full mouth was curved into a smirk as he looked at me, leaning against the wall in the corner of my friends party.

"Ashley invited me. I'm on her production team," I told the man in front of me and he nodded, taking a sip from the drink in his hand and getting a look around at this place. He looked familiar but I couldn't care enough right now to place it. This party was fun, yet full of people I never really got on with. That's, after all, most of what this industry was. People from supposedly different walks of life in a room, whereas the harsh reality was it was mostly just white people from a billion different towns and the occasional black or brown person sprinkled in. Which is why I only went to other poc parties, I didn't want to feel any more subjected than I already am, daily. We were at the corner of the party, blending into the dark corners. I was more into people watching than sitting there, looking at all these people and realize I don't belong here. For some reason, I thought Ashley's party would be different. "I'm Calum," he said after a moment of the both of us watching two guys dance, high off some substance, and strip to nothing. I looked in astonishment and he looked incredulous back at me. He turned his full body back to me and reached out to shake my hand, "You are?" "I don't know," I smirked, giving his hand a shake, watching as his large, brown hand enveloped mine, "I liked the Dollface bit. I may have to change my name."

I've always loved pet names since I was younger. From my aunties and many older cousins constantly calling me, 'sugar', 'tink', 'baby girl' to just about anything under the sun. I missed it out here in LA. Most pet names felt either patronizing or downright sexual. I miss the affection in them. "Well, Dollface," Calum looked around, his eyes going wide, I figured he had an idea forming, "Do you want to get out of here? Between you and me, I'd rather be anywhere else, not this uncomfortable in a friend's house." I smirked at the boy, though I agreed with everything he was saying, I wasn't that easy. I still couldn't place his face, even though he looked softer than a bunny. My mom did not raise a fool though, "You think I'll go with some boy I just met? I'm not gonna end up on the news." "Trust me," Cal held up his hands, showing the palms of them. I got a good look at the ink that covered them, what peaked out from under his jackets sleeves. He looked artistic with the black ink decorating his skin, "I couldn't hurt a fly if I tried." I thought about it for a second. I looked back around at Ashley's party. I watched as some guy, skin shining in the black lighting of the room, showing just how flushed he was, his porcelein decorated in tattoos and his inky, jet black hair, long and greasy, climb onto Ashley's coffee table, a bag of some small, pill drug in his hand and yell, "Who's ready for Pictionary!" "Yeah, let's get out of here," I said quickly and rushed out the door. Calum was quick to follow behind.

--

"So what's it like being in a rock band?" I asked Calum. We left the party around 9 at night. Still way too early to just go home. We found ourselves, just an hour later, in some beat up diner on the outskirts of town, eating whatever they had to offer and a table covered in a slur of milkshakes. "Uhhhh," Calum thought for a second, taking a sip of the salted caramel milkshake before taking out his straw and sliding it over to me, "It's amazing for the most part." "I use to want to be in a rock band," I confessed, putting my straw into the milkshake and slurping. That was pretty darn good. "Why didn't you?" This time he grabbed a cheesecake one and tried it. His face scrunched up in thought at the taste then nodded. He approved, sliding it to me. "It's pretty hard to be black and taken seriously in genres like that and country. It's hard enough just being in the industry," I said honestly and he nodded, completely understanding me. "My fans whitewash me," Cal's voice was solemn stating that, he spoke softly, looking down at the table, his fingers tracing the wood grain. Something that probably hurt him at the erasure of his culture and skin tone to fit some looks that girls wanted him to be. I'd believe it considering whenever someone even labelled me as anything less than what I am, it took a complete hit. I could only imagine what that was like on a larger scale to people that never met you. I took a sip of the cheesecake milkshake and he went on, "It was really bad when we first came out. People would take pictures of me and raise the exposure," he paused and barked out a laugh that didn't quite sound as hearty, "I swear in some photos I was paler than Mikey." I gave him a sad smile and he threw a butter packet from the dispenser at me. I yelped and ducked quickly out of the way, the packet hitting the booth instead of me, "Watch it!" "Don't sad smile me," Calum giggled, taking another sip of the salted caramel milkshake, "I'm a grown man, Doll." "Even grown men get compassion sometimes, Calum," my voice was soft and he looked up at me then, like really looked at me. His brown eyes held me there and I felt like he was reading me, trying to figure out what I had to gain from this, but it was nothing. I gained nothing from our interaction right now and I think he saw that in my eyes in that moment.

---

"Holy hell, doll, you're wig scared the shit out of me," I giggled at Calum coming into the room, holding the mannequin head with one of my wigs placed on top of it. I was currently in the middle of washing my hair and was busy towel drying it when he came in. We'd been dating for six months now. To say the six months wasn't one of the best of my life, would be a complete lie. I was fully devoted to Calum and he was to me. It felt like since we met, we were meant to be. He just understood me completely and I understood him and all his wants, needs, and pleasures. I knew it from the first time he shook my hand and how my hand fit in his, it was perfect. I watched Cal from the mirror as he looked at the mannequin. I heard him clear his throat and I sighed. Whatever he said was going to be something annoying, I just know it. "Wow, Calum, you're so gorgeous," Calum spoke in a high pitch voice, moving the mannequin's head as he spoke, making his ventriloquist debut, I suppose. "Oh, god," I groaned. "Oh, thank you, dollface" he said in his normal voice. Then in his crazy voice, he spoke again, "You're so hot, you scalped me." I nearly choked on my own laughter. I loved his puns so much and he knew it. I rested my head in my palms and he continued. "Is that you meant when you said you wanted me to pull your hair?" "Now, now, let's not get ahead of ourselves." I was full on laughing at this point, nearly breathless watching him go back and forth talking to my wig. At some point, he decided to put it on his shaved head. "How do I look, doll?" he said and squatted down to where I was in front of the mirror, getting a good look at himself. "Wow, Calum, you're so gorgeous," I mocked him and he rolled his eyes at me. "Don't act like you don't love my shenanigans," Cal draped his arms around my waist, pulling me in close before kissing my lips softly. I love you, I thought but was careful not to say it. Not yet.

---

"It's hardly anything special, doll." "Hardly anything special?" I was literally bouncing on the balls of my feet. Calum chuckled at me, pulling me into his lap and kissed my cheek. "This is something you want, right?" Calum asked me, his eyes wide, "I've always been scared of doing this but doing this with you just makes sense." "Calum," I grabbed his face and pinched his large cheeks. I couldn't help but giggle at the squishy boy, "It's perfect. Post it!" For the past nine months, we've been dating in secret. The boys knew about his, so did my coworkers and Ashley but the rest of the world did not. We were pretty decent at not having any pictures of us taken, most people just assuming I was a new manager of theirs since I was Ashley's. But we were nearing one year and we wanted to go out in public together, alone, and be a couple. I wanted to say that Calum Thomas Hood was my baby and no one elses. "Alright, but once I do," Calum said, pulling out his phone. His voice was grave as if trying to scare me and I just rolled my eyes at him, "There's no going back." "I don't want to go back. I want you," I said and he pulled me closer into his lap. "Keep talking like that and I'll want you riding me in just a second," Calum's voice was dark and I winked at him. "What makes you think I don't want that too?" I whispered in his ear and he growled, his lips attaching to my neck. I moaned as he began with the soft kisses in all the spots I wanted, "We're getting distracted, love." He groaned and moved away, unlocking his phone. He tucked his head in the pit of my neck and cuddled me close. Our bodies pressed together as if he was scared I'll leave at any second, "I'm yours. No matter what happens." "I'm yours, Calum. Don't worry, you act like they're going to kill me," my arms were wrapped around his shoulders and my cheeks getting irritated by the small strands of his hair, but I didn't move. I never wanted to leave his embrace. Calum showed me his phone as he posted it.

@Calum5sos Santa gave me the best gift this year.

Underneath was a a picture of the two of us in my full length mirror. We were both wearing matching Christmas pajamas, covered in festive prints with Duke at our feet in his own Christmas jumper. My hair was out and unstyled, something I hardly ever did unless I was home, Calum was in his full scruff and just woken up eyes, holding me snug against his body as he took the photo with Duke jumping onto his legs. We were both smiling happily in the photo that was taken just yesterday. "I love that picture," I mumbled and I felt Calum smile against my skin. The comments began rolling in. My heart sank.

(A/N: i hope these aren’t anyones names besides the three i hyperlinked)

@domsmash: OH, so he likes them black, huh?

@discalneckted: i'm so sad about this. interracial dating is never okay

@galcalirwin: oh my gosh, you look so happy, I'm so happy about this! I'm shipping it fully! You go, Cal.

@bluebabycal​: this makes me SO soft asjhfdkjjssjs. i can't believe i'm blessed.

@lmmuffinsos​: if i don't get at least one (1) metaphor comparing her skin to beautiful things on the next album, i'm unstanning

@ifcalhoodwaswhite: why are you guys so excited about this, this is not OKAY? @ifcalhoodwaswhite: Calum should be single or dating one of his own! @discalneckted liked this comment @galcalirwin​ replied: Literally go fuck yourself. Race means nothing when he's smiling that big

@Calum5sos liked @galcalirwin's reply

"See," Calum looked at me gravely. His voice was full of fear. I knew he was thinking I would back out rather than stay with him despite the awful comments some people felt about interracial dating. Even if he wasn't white, it was what people wanted. I rolled my eyes at him, moving so that I could look him in the eye, "Calum Thomas Hood, I love you. No racists or fans or man or woman, can ever make me stop loving you." Calum's breath caught as he looked at me. This was my first time saying I love you. His eyes glistened as he looked at me, "I love you. And your skin. And your eyes. And your hair. And your lips. And your smile." I giggled as he pressed a kiss to each part of my face. I loved this man. Every single part of him. And it wasn't race that connected us. No. It was the sheer personality and love we had for each other. "So, about this song about me," I said and Calum groaned. "Mmm," Calum moved to kiss my neck, "Let's make it a steamy song, then." I giggled as he traced kisses down every one of my sweet spots before carrying me to the bedroom.

[simpracha]

also, i just got here, why r we mad at calum?

[simpracha]

HE IS BABY YOU SLUTS

[simpracha]

Calum being nervous to mix is so cute