Jul 21, 2021
the literal exquisite violence of the heaven memories 5×16 episode like over and over again they hammer in how dean sees his family duties and taking care of other people as the golden calf the false idol he will split his ribs open for and then time and time again god will never speak to him the people he loves will always leave him behind and he is empty, guts upturned, every single time
#supernatural#flicker's meta#flickerthoughts#one of his FAVORITE memories was as a 3yo comforting his OWN mother#one of sams favorite memories is leaving for stanford and that was one of deans worst nights in the world#another one of sams fave memories is running away while dean took the brunt of johns anger#THEN they make the ghost of his mother who he looks at like the face of god tell him she was SHACKLED TO HIM#like the literal way one of his mirrors is his mother is just so fucking violent. fucking.#'you raise kids and they break your heart and they become heroes'#ch rist
