#chetwyn

[naruhate]

F for Cassetti Ermine everyone.

This was supposed to be a quick morning doodle. I ended up taking a whole day just to draw Dulcinea's outfit. Then I thought might as well colour it in greyscale, then use gradient map to fill in the colour.

I've had this idea way back when, and I only got the balls to draw it now. It was worth every minute. My mouth was agape just like Ermine's when I was drawing it. This too is yuri.

[shouposting]

We all have our favourite vocaloids to listen to hehe… my fav is Luka, Chetwyn’s fav is Teto, Othello’s fav is Kafu, and Ermine’s fav is Fukase.

[naruhate]

i'm curious. who does othello parallel to?

What, a question for me?

Short answer: Othello parallels Outis.

Long answer: They are both parental figures in my Tram, Othello being a Smoke War veteran who wants nothing to do with the City anymore. They were set up by Iago, one of their protégés, and their whole crew was doomed for death. Othello technically did not survive, because they had lost their identity (like Odysseus becoming Outis ‘nobody’) and mutated into this pallid mermaid thingy that I adore.

[naruhate]

Thinking about Mobius and Eden again.

Eden is my favourite character in Hi3. I headcanon her as passively suicidal long before she even became a Flamechaser. The world is ending, people are being decimated a continent at a time, and all she can do is sing and perform yet people keep throwing money at her and make her richer, treating her like symbol of hope, so all she can do is keep living for their sake even if she doesn’t want to.

Then she met Elysia, who actually embodies what the people think Eden is. And the real deal was so glorious that it made her feel minuscule in comparison. But in an affirming way, because she has always felt like she doesn’t deserve the level of fanaticism surrounding her image. Actually feeling little in front of someone, when she had always been treated like something so big, makes her feel so moved that it was like love.

I know they gay as hell but I don’t ship them romantically. It’s more like a god to human relationship than human to human one like my Mobi Eden. But I think Elysia feels something for Eden too, like she sees a girl who could never love herself nearly as much as people love her, and it hurts her heart a lot. So she always pays special attention to Eden, talking softer around her, and making sure she is actually heard and seen.

After Elysia died (not spoilers because this al happened in the past era), Eden lost her North Star and she slipped back to alcoholism and depression. What good can she do when even her god dies in this world? There is no hope for her, and there is no reason to keep living and intruding onto the next era of humanity. I think that’s the absolute saddest part… she doesn’t want to overstep.. thinking something like the next era will have their own Eden, so they don’t need her.

She really has the lowest self esteem i just feel it. She made it all the way until the end. But she never congratulated herself for surviving. She always acts like everyone carried her there like a trophy, and they want her to live on just out of adoration… she never believed she deserved to live on and tell the tale of her life just like others do.

The only one who was there left to try to convince her otherwise was Mobius… A self centred scientist, with files documenting her upbringing. The lines of past and present time blurs together, with the child Mobius naming herself Mobius like an adult would. It could happen, or it could be the document malfunctioning. Nonetheless, in the end, she had a talk with Eden. I don’t remember the details too clearly, but at first she was pissed off with Eden for choosing death, as she couldn’t fathom why someone could have such a low self esteem.

But then, it was revealed spoilers that Mobius (simulation) was the one that couldn’t understand Mobius (real) because the real one followed Eden after and chose to stay… The simulation couldn’t understand how to not value it’s own survival, but it also couldn’t understand love… the love she had for Eden, the love she had for Klein that was buried with guilt… why should she live after all that? She couldn’t even muster up an egotistical answer. No love from family, no more second family, and the last person she loved, who had always inspired her so much with her silly pointless songs about illogical emotions now too revealed that she had no love for herself.

They were both just clinging to the only thing that gave them meaning, for Eden it was art, so Mobius it was science. It was what they’re so good at, it was like they were born to do just that. But unknowingly, just Eden’s presence amongst the Flamechasers was making Mobius love music a little more… (I’m pretty sure that was in the files and not just in my head).

She only realised her feelings for the singer at last. In those final moments on earth, instead of going to the cryo chamber, she stayed by Eden’s side… watching the world end together. It was so illogical that Mobius (simulation) hallucinated about killing the real one herself and replacing her. Because dying is just so illogical, a perfect program would never do that. And of course, a perfect program of Eden would never die either… as sad as she looks in the Elysian Realm, she was united with Elysia and everyone again, so there would be no need to cry… even though it almost looks like she could tell it’s just a dream. It’s too good to be true after all.

😔

I miss these two so much. Wish I could draw them.

[naruhate]

I couldn't resist drawing this. Chetwyn as Valencina ID.

I'm so sleepy. I don't know if I want to colour it or leave it noir. This looks like a mafia film screencap fr. This is pre-uptie, right before I get my eye lopped off. My headmates keep saying I look like Whitney from DoL lmao.

[naruhate]

Hey, if anyone cares, I just wanna brief you on my life rn. Mostly for my headmate’s sake, so they know what’s up too.

I’m working a job that I don’t want, but I have no choice because it’s currently the only place that will take me. And I’ll have to endure for an indefinite amount of time until they fire me or a different place I consent to picks me up. It sounds simple right?

However, reality is that every single hirer that I contact needs to look at my curriculum vitae, and they will see that I missed several years of education. It’s not like they’d know my health history. Do you know what they’d think when they see my CV? “I asked for an abled person to work, so why do you waste my time to bring your face here?” Every single time. I could always hear their unspoken disdain for me being outside of my containment zone. But they simply say I’m not suitable for the job. Right, so what is a job suitable for human trash like me?

I can’t even get hired for physical labour that people get trafficked to do. And every second I breathe I’m just fulfilling someone’s ableist ideas of what my disorders represent. And I really wish I’d just die already to save everyone that trouble, but even I know that it’s a load of bull crap that I’m made to feel this way.

Oh addition to post: I only got this job at all because my dad personally knows the CEO, so he was pleading, and also, I had to be there and listen to all the ableist things he’d say about me to the employer like “thanks for having this kid around even though it’s disabled, it can still work though, if you give it work to do.” How flattering.

[naruhate]

Desdemona~ She really is the cutest girl in the world.

I'm making art to edit those voice claims videos.

I just realised I drew her at the start of last month when I started my job. Then I've been spiralling down this web of Limbus Company posting even though I wasn't even playing the game much at that point. I've became a lot more shameless since lmao.

They used to be beans... You can still find them on the blog dated March 4th. Idk... I think she looks better as a bean. Can't believe I'd butcher her looks like this.

[naruhate]

Did i cook with this? I was just looking at Rodion's uptie art while trying to get the same vibe. Don't want to draw background so... it's white. I know the weapon is hard to see, but it's a baton that's also like a whip sword can extend to do electroshock damage specifically to shields... Complicated I know. Also I know it looks more complicated than what I usually draw, but I tend to put way more effort in drawing when I'm angry so yea.

This will be used for the voiceclaim vid as usual.

Effie was made to be my parallel guys trust just look at this expression. I'm happy that Rodya got this ID so I can steal it from her.

Did you know he has a long braid and prosthetic right arm. And Saude recently lost the other arm on the left. They're matching <3.