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Understanding Scope Creep in Freelance Work
A potential client messages you on LinkedIn or Upwork. They want someone with photography skills. They also want social media know-how to create content and manage platforms. Their Budget? $50. Maybe $75. For the month. Does that sound familiar to you? It’s not just a budget issue — this is scope creep in its sneakiest form. What Is Scope Creep? Scope creep is more than just a client asking…
Navigating Scope Creep in Freelance Jobs
They want someone with photography skills. They also want social media know-how to create content and manage platforms. Budget: $50. Maybe $75. For the month. This isn’t just a budget issue—this is scope creep in its sneakiest form. What Is Scope Creep? Scope creep happens when a client keeps asking for more—more tasks, more roles—without offering more pay or time. It turns a fair writing job…
How I reinforce client-therapist boundaries at the end of every session
Setting boundaries… When reaching out to your photographer. When reaching out to your client.…
Setting boundaries…
When reaching out to your photographer.
When reaching out to your client.
Over time I have noticed a trend regarding clients and appointments. Have you ever got a call from a person who stated “Oh we love your (fill in blank) and I will get back to you by the end of the week to set an appointment.” A week goes by. Then a second week. Finally you tell yourself, “OK, they are…
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I guess the rough line in the sand for pet names for me is, "Is it sentimental? If yes, then it's off limits (for my own sake) with clients."
And then I get to stuff like, what about sex acts or gestures and acts of affection? Like, the sex stuff is actually pretty easy, I think what makes sex with my partners intimate and close and "special" is that it's him-specifically-with-me-specifically, it's not the act in isolation. The only thing that might not be true for is certain kinds of kink stuff I do with one boyfriend in particular, but I really don't think I have the stamina to deal with clients' egos when they want a "serious" sub/Domme. I have so much respects for pro subs and Dommes here on Tumblr who I've been reading and following recently, I don't know how y'all do it. Maybe I'll work up to it some day, if there's more money in it or it comes up naturally, but aside from some light bondage or impact stuff I think I'll reserve the more, I don't know, emotionally heavy/loaded kink for my boyfriend, too?
Since I'm selling the GFE and that's what I'm good at, holding hands, cuddling, that kind of thing is open. But no naked-junk-to-junk cuddling, I'll always put my underwear back on since that's just sex safety stuff (I have to be accountable not just to myself but my partners, and we don't use condoms or barriers when we have sex, so I'm sure as shit using barriers for any and every potential fluid exchange act with my clients), so that's probably just for partners. I also just honestly don't really expect my clients to do the sweet little things that I really value with my partners, because, I don't know, that's not what they're buying my time for? I mean, if they want to spend $$$ on me to tangle their fingers in my hair and smile at me in bed, like, mazel tov, I'll gladly smile back and accept their money. But it seems unlikely. 'Cause, you know. Str8 dudes.
I guess it's odd that I feel the impulse to compartmentalize like this, but the erosion of these boundaries is what fucked me up with my proto-clients so I feel like I need it to stay sane and healthy. ETA: Dude I should totally make a chart for this stuff in Excel.
Oh man I also need to figure out how/if to bring up white privilege with them. I never did around my proto-clients, because I needed the shit they bought me more than I needed to stand up for myself.
But man, I think that's going to be the biggest weight on me, those constant racial microaggressions. I know some people who can turn it into light, playful teasing without coming across as threatening, but I can't do that, I'm too cranky/take no shit about it.
Buffer for it in therapy and keep my mouth shut, I guess? Bleurgh.
If I don’t get this stuff organized ahead of time I won’t know what I’m doing in the moment.
I’ve been thinking and talking a lot about how to put up and maintain boundaries between me and my clients, not so much in terms of sex acts (though that’s what everyone automatically wants to know about) but privacy and intimacy. Like, clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead was saying that Nabokov is off limits as conversational fodder, and I have a lot of authors and books like that (Octavia Butler, Junot Diaz, also Nabokov, for me), just pieces of media that are very near and dear to me and I would probably punch someone for talking down to me about or trying to act like they were the expert about. Especially since I foresee my clientele being largely white straight dudes.
But I was also thinking about more obviously intimate stuff, like pet names. Since I’m in two serious relationships right now it really matters to me to keep the stuff my boyfriends call me very much theirs, if that makes sense? Like, there are the weird, almost painfully corny pet names that are kind of like inside jokes that I would be startled if someone thought to call me/I’d call them (like “doodlebug”, “babby”, “wolfie,” - gosh, this is real gross lololol). But I also feel real close when my partners call me love, or darling, or sweetheart, or lovie, which is a lot more likely and common, and what I call them, too. So all of those are not nicknames I want to call any of my clients.
But the experience and persona I’m selling includes this illusory performance of intimacy, and pet names are a part of it. What are generic enough pet names that don’t overlap with my own life? So basically the ones that make me cringe a little inside? “Honey”? “Angel”? Basically I want to find three and stick to them alone, really play them up so my clients think they’re “their” names and there’s minimal crossing of streams. (It worked with my proto-clients, I used to call them my “lions” because I was literally like “what’s the worst, cheesiest name I could call someone” and someone told me that’s what the protagonists call each other in Twilight and I was like “SOLD” and, boy, did those dudes eat it up.) Just three stupid corny names I’ll never call my boyfriends by/they’ll never call me by, it can’t be that hard, right?
