Like my stuff? You can consider buying me a coffee!
COMPLETED:
Prinxiety:
Fingerprints (Prinxiety): soulmate au in which your soulmate’s fingerprints tattoo into your body. Chapter: 1 2 3 4
Two bullets and three shots (Prinxiety): Soulmate au in which Virgil is exclusive serial killer and Roman is raising Broadway star
Adjusting facts (Prinxiety): Don’t you love it when you’re making out with your boyfriend and your mum video-calls you?
The train story (Prinxiety): //from messed-up prompt//: There’s a snowstorm and Virgil and Roman are stuck in the train.
Lucky (Prinixety): //prompt: lucky// a story about how unlucky Roman is
What Make a Good Lava Cake? (Prinxiety): Roman wants to make a breakfast for Virgil
Analogical:
Full Moon (Analogical): //inspired with punk! Logan and emo! Virgil// Logan and Virgil meet for the first time in 13 years
The Punk Boy Case (Analogical): roommate au featuring punk! Logan and emo! Virgil
Logince:
And were they soulmates? (Logince): tooth-rotting fluffy logince
Secrets in the snow (Logince): Snow is great but Roman is better.
Hotel in NYC (platonic/familial Logince): Roman wants to apologize.
Other ships:
My FBI Agent (Logicality): Logan is Patton’s FBI Agent
The troubles with Sleep (Sleepxiety): Virgil has problems with Sleep(ing)
Secret (Moxiety): prompt I could kiss you right now, very fluffy
We lost (platonic Roceit): Of a friendship between a hero and a villain
Deep water (romantic Roceit): Roman’s eyes used to be blue
Mixed ships:
Horizons: (Logicality, Prinxiety, platonic LAMP) TS Storytime Big Bang Fic
Fics centered around one side:
The Lie That Created Chaos in Liar’s Lair (Deceit-centered): How does Deceit’s room look like?
The Dreamcatcher (Remy/Sleep’s angst): In which we learn a little bit about Remy’s job.
Virge (mtf Virgil): Turns out that “Virge” isn’t shorter form of “Virgil”
The Perfectionist (Roman’s angst): Roman’s room hides many secrets.
Princess (Roman-centered): Roman has a dog.
Agony (Roman-centered): //prompt: agony// Roman in da bath
Tribute to Opportunity (Logan-centered): Logan finds out about rover Opportunity.
Apathy’s lore:
Apathy (dark!Roman): A story about how Roman turned dark.
link to the masterpost
SHORT-FICS:
Is it over? (no ship just Virgil): Thing takes place soon after Can LYING Be Good; Virgil has a demon in his room to fight (also Deceit tw)
Fading (LAMP): what happens to the sides when the host dies.
WIPs:
Collapsing Star - on hiatus (!) (one-sided moxiety, logicality, eventual prinxiety): Roman after years comes back to his hometown to find out that his friends are nursing 19 years old boy. Chapter: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
Angst Next Door (prinxiety): trigger warning for depression and such
"After You, I never thought I'd find that feeling again; that feeling of "Home" radiating from my core. But here I am - no longer feeling The Sun from both sides, but discovering the heat of a Collapsing Star from within." ~ Returning Home to the Stars //Catfish
So I’ve started yet another story this time with a big pinch of moxiety (and eventual prinxiety because I’m a trash and can’t write anything else bye)
Collapsing Star
Obviously you can read it on AO3
next chapter
Parings: one sided moxiety, eventual prinxiety, logicality
word count: 2582
tw: depression and anxiety disorder
Roman is sitting relaxed on Patton's sofa, laughing at one of his puns. They accidentally bumped into each other few weeks ago just after Roman moved back to his hometown. That was their first meeting since high school times. Yet Patton's pun remained just as pure as they used to be. And Logan is still getting as annoyed as he used to be upon hearing them. The only difference is that now Patton kisses down each of Logan's frowns. Roman smiles. He's happy that these two found their way together. He used to ship them so hard during the school times and when he learnt that Logan is going overseas to study his heart broke. Apparently he came back after two years, called Patton and week later they were happy couple. They now have been dating for 3 years and Roman couldn't get happier. And apparently so do they.
"Oh man so many things has changed since high school..." sighs Roman "You two are together. I, instead of being a hollywood star, am managing the theater... So many has changed..." He looks around the comfy apartment Logan and Patton share. It’s so cozy, he has never been here before and yet it feels like home already.
"But is it a bad thing though?" beams Patton "As long as we're all happy it shouldn't matter what we accomplished and have yet to accomplish in our lifes!"
"Agreed." nods Logan and delicately squeezes Patton thigh.
"And I'm so glad that you came back to Florida Ro!" adds Patton grabbing a cookie "We've missed you so much here! This town seems so boring without you!"
"Well Patton, technically the number of residents of this city makes it almost impossible to avoid any interesting situa-" he stops in the middle of the sentence and the smile drops off his face "Your earbud is..."
Patton with one quick move clicks the earbud which has been in his ear since Roman walked through the door. Now that he thinks of it Patton has been wearing it every time since the reunion in grocery store few weeks ago.
"Hello?" asks Patton. He's not smiling anymore. His face is serious and his lips form one thin line. Roman can't remember seeing Patton like that. "Never." Says Patton after few seconds and Roman catches a sight of sadness in his eyes. Apparently someone on the other side of the phone has said something sad or disturbing. Patton has always been a sensitive guy. He gestures Logan to give him a piece of paper and quickly notes down some address "Okay I have this. Stay on the phone. I'm coming. Stay on the phone." he says and quickly walks out of the room. Soon the front door shuts and Patton leaves. Confused Roman looks at Logan who sighs and rests his elbows on knees.
"A lot has changed since you left Roman." he clears his throat awkwardly. This is new to Roman too. He knows that Logan hardly ever has problems with explaining things, but this time he seems to be clearly uncomfortable.
"You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to Lo. I understand that we may have… grown apart a little bit" says Roman, even though he's really curious. He knows that his friends' feelings go first so if Logan doesn't want to talk about it- he's not going to force him.
"No, it's nothing really..." Logan exhales loudly "Despite the time that has passed I still consider you one of my closest friends Roman." he smiles slightly and Roman smiles back. He's glad that the relation between them hasn't faded away completely and now they can restore this friendship.
"So?" asks Roman and moves a little bit closer. Now he can ask about details. The tight grip on his heart disappeared being replaced with new one. Why was Patton sad? What happened when he Romas was away?
"So you know Patton..." Logan's voice is a little bit softer when he says the name of his boyfriend "He's the best human walking on this world. He sees the best in people and he loves to help others..."
"Mhm..."
"Few months ago Patton has registered into this program."
"What program?"
"It's called...Guardian Angel... I doubt you’ve heard of it. It’s this kind of program you wouldn't never hear about unless you look for it. And believe me Patton was looking for something like this for a long time... But let’s start from beginning, shall we? You remember that he used to suffer from depression, right?"
Roman nods quietly. These were dark days. The diagnosis and the struggles Patton has to face every day... Finally he managed to win with the illness but Roman knows that he still has to check up at doctor from time to time.
"So Guardian Angel is about helping people with depression and other mental illnesses. The recreation process is long and arduous but Patton of course was determined to become someone's angel. He passed all the tests. And it’s not easy to pass them for someone who himself has had troubles with mental illnesses…. So after that he had to wait for a person who needed help and was willing to put themselves under Patton's care."
"Willing to?" Roman raises his eyebrow.
"Yes, the person of whom you're taking care of chooses the guardian themselves. Patton was like a little teddy bear to be shot down at the lottery. It made me a little bit mad because Patton being Patton was worried that no one will like him enough to choose him. But... after weeks of waiting someone has appeared... A boy though he would be offended if he heard me speaking like that about him." Logan chuckles "He's 19 now, but he was 17 back then... his name... his name is Virgil. And Patton is up to his disposition 24 hours per day, 7 days per week. He even have a special earbud. You must have noticed it. So whenever Virgil doesn’t do well or needs help Patton is there to pick up the phone which mostly ends up with him taking Virgil home.”
Roman leans, trying to analyses what Logan has just said to him.
"So now Patton is...?"
"Yes, picking up Virgil. They will probably come here if Virgil feels like meeting someone new. But I think he doesn’t mind that too much. So unless you want to leave, you can stay. You're no bother Roman." Logan stands up "I have to make some tea. Virgil will probably want something hot to drink... He was probably wandering around the town with his friends again. It always ends up like that... He gets hurt and..."
Roman follows Logan to the kitchen and watches as his friend boils the water. Suddenly a question pops into his mind.
"Are how do you feel about this situation?" he asks and Logan smiles slightly.
"At first it was weird... You know technically I’m no one to Virgil. I mean, I’m not the part of the project so at first I felt a little bit excluded. Especially since there are days when Virgil has to stay with us for a few days... And sometimes he needs to be taken to the doctor... Things like that felt weird at the beginning but now..." the smile grows wider "He feels almost like a little brother you have to take care of which is a pain but you still love him. It's hard to explain but despite all these horrible things he has been through Virgil is great person. And he has grown up so much during past two years! You wouldn't believe! He's so much mature now! He's not attending college yet but we're slowly thinking about it. He's health goes first so I sometimes teach him some random stuff from my textbooks, you know Roman and... wait what are you laughing about?" Logan frowns and Roman can't hold the laughter inside anymore.
"I've never thought about you in terms of proud father Lo!" he exclaims finally as he somehow manages to conduct a series of breathes in order to calm himself down. Logan snorts.
"If you spend as much of your time with someone like Virgil you would be proud of him too."
"Yea... That's what I dream of Lo.” Roman’s voice is laced with sarcasm “Handsome male with sad background story and I'm his prince on white horse! But in my vision I'm his lover. Not his mother, Logan!" laughs Roman. He knows he shouldn't but he still laughs. He feels a spark of excitement when corners of Logan's lips travel up.
"You haven't changed at all Roman." he shakes his head and pours the tea with water. Small, cozy kitchen fills with the smell of green tea and mint. "Do you like mint tea? Sorry that's all I have since Patton started freaking out about Virgil's health, all we eat and drink recently are greens." he says it completely seriously but Roman can sense a tickle of humor in the tone of Logan's voice.
"Mint is okay." replies Roman and Logan take another mug out of the cupboard. All of them are covered with colorful dots except of one which has little purple bat on it. Roman doesn't need a genius to guess who's the owner of this mug. He tries to imagine Virgil. He’s probably shy… With blonde angelic locks and big, green eyes. Following Patton everywhere like a lost puppy. Most likely wearing all grey. And on the top of that- gay. Roman hums to himself.
"Logan aren't you jealous though?" he asks with curiosity after few minutes.
"What do you mean?" Logan looks at him with surprise.
"I mean... Patton and Virgil must share a special bond since Patton is his ‘angel’, oh my that sounds stupid but anyway... The age gap between them is only 4 years too. And as you said before you don’t have access to everything they do. And that earbud thingy… Doesn’t it worry you a little bit? I know that you consider Virgil as your younger brother but... He doesn't have to think that way. Okay and now you’re laughing? Great just great, would you enlighten me what you find so funny?” Roman grunts embarrassed watching Logan holding his stomach as a wave of giggles comes from his mouth.
"Don't worry friend. First of all, Virgil and Patton tell me everything. I don’t feel excluded even in the slightest. Second of all... Virgil has hinted us recently that he may or may not have a girlfriend."
"Straight? In 21st century?" mocks Roman teasingly and Logan raises hands in defense.
"Hey, I'm no one to judge! He knows that I will support him no matter what. But." he stops abruptly and points at Roman "You. Don't you dare to hit on this boy. Playboy."
"I'm not a boy anymore Lo-ogic." snorts bored voice from the corridor and Roman immediately turns around. So that must be Virgil. He looks nothing like Roman has imagined. He's leaning over the door-frame with his hands crossed on the chest. He's wearing a dark leather jacket and black skinny jeans. His bangs is dyed purple and Roman would say that he looks like a classical bad-boy if it wasn't that Virgil's whole face is smudged with resting of black eyeliner and eyeshadow. Streams of tears are still visible on his cheeks.
"Oh Virgil. You're here. How amazing." smiles Logan softly. "Oh you too Patton. I've made you some tea. Sit down, both of it. You must be tired. So Pat, did it go smoothly?" asks Logan as Patton sits next to Roman who feels a little bit out of place right now. He watches as Virgil lazily walks over to the chair and literally falls onto it. He leans his head back with closed eyes. Roman finds it a little bit weird but basing on lack of reaction in both Logan and Patton's posture he assumes that it's normal.
"He forgot to take his meds again." sighs Patton with a pinch of accusation in his voice.
"Oh." escapes from Logan's mouth.
"For a week." finishes Patton.
"Oh!" this sigh is much more aggressive and both Logan and Patton stares into Virgil's exposed neck as if they were trying to burn holes in it.
"I just didn't feel like it." mumbles Virgil more to himself than to Logan or Patton. The purple lacy ribbon around his neck, moves slightly on his Adam’s apple.
"Well young man you know I will have to report that." Patton clicks his tongue. "Could you at least tell me if you have them with you?"
Virgil rolls his head and finally faces Roman. Until now Roman hasn't realized that he is sitting directly in front of Virgil. He gulps. This is awkward but Virgil doesn’t seem to care about Roman at all. Not something Roman has expected from a mentally ill person but who is he to judge.
"Maybe I do, maybe I don't..." hums Virgil almost cheerfully and takes out his phone.
"Virgil." Logan's voice is cold and sends chills down Roman's spine but it seems that it doesn't bother Virgil even in the slightest. He types something into the phone, waiting if either Patton or Logan say something more.
"Okay I will take them now." he groans finally after replying to some text and takes off small box. Roman can't see the name of the medicine but it's pretty obvious that it's antidepressants. Virgil quickly gulps the pill. "Satisfied?"
Logan sighs and Patton smiles brightly.
"You want us to treat you like an adult and yet you act like this..." says Logan, gets up from the table and leaves the room mumbling something about writing to the doctor.
Roman notices that Virgil almost immediately buries his nose in his phone.
"Who are you texting kiddo?" asks Patton sweetly and Virgil flinches a little bit. His bangs fall into his eyes more and more.
"No one special." Comes a quick reply.
"Girlfriend?" chuckles Patton.
"Maybe." replies Virgil shortly with his eyes still glued to the phone.
Patton giggles once again.
"Do you want some more tea Roman? Oh right! Roman you don't know Virgil. I mean officially! Roman this is my little Virgil. Virgil honey this is my old friend Roman."
Virgil finally brings himself to look up at Roman.
"Sup?" he says quickly and his gaze drops down again.
"Nice to meet you too..." snorts Roman. Patton laughs as if he was watching a good comedy, not an awkward meeting. He gets up and ruffles Virgil's hair.
"I'll be back in a minute." he says and turns around.
Huge blush crawls on Virgil's face and he quietly looks above his shoulder at Patton who disappears in the door. Small smile wanders in the corner of his lips and Roman gasps. Virgil instantly turns his gaze on Roman and bites his lip. They for a while stare at each other trying to read each other's expression. Virgil is the first one who turns away his eyes.
"Guilty." flashes through Roman's head but he stays silent. Instead his clicks his tongue. To his utter surprise Virgil hisses at him.
"What the-"
"What?" grunts Virgil and his gaze falls back on the phone "Have you never seen a hissing emo with make-up ruined from crying."
Roman laughs quietly.
"No, I have not."
"You're welcome then." Virgil's eyes look up for a tiny piece of second before dropping down again.
Summary: Roman learns a little bit more about Virgil and himself
TW: depression, suicide attempt, anxiety attack, homophobia, abusive parents, also I curse a lot
Word count: 4281 (meaning long ass shit)
You can read this on AO3
Chapter 1 Previous Chapter
Chapter 4 Chapter 5
All days seem to be similar to each other recently. Roman gets up in the morning. Checks if the theater was opened on the right time. He watches the rehearsals of the performances, gives actors his advices, he records the number of the people on the audience during last night and he goes back home. Every weekend he visits Patton and Logan. Every weekend he finds out that Virgil's not there. Every weekend he's a little bit disappointed with that.
"So how does it look? Doesn't he have to like checkup on you Patton?" asks Roman one long evening when the three of them, Roman, Patton and Logan, sit over some board game. Patton hums. The name doesn’t have to pop out, everybody knows about who Roman ask.
"No, not exactly. If he sees his doctor, he doesn't have to tell me anything. And I know that he hasn't missed a single visit during last few weeks. Sometimes he calls me to tell me that he's okay and stuff like that but he does it mostly because he knows that I'm worried."
Roman nods. Virgil definitely cares if Patton worries.
"It looked differently when he was younger though." continues Patton "Back then almost every therapy session was conducted with me since he wasn't officially adult. Actually he could legally give up on whole project after his 18th birthday. But he didn't. Both me and his psychologist were delighted with this fact because he was getting through some really rough time back then..."
"What do you mean?" Roman tilts his head and immediately regrets asking.
"He had his suicide attempt." states calmly Logan but Roman sees how his fingers twitch when he tries to explain "He... Virgil was trying to hang himself a week before his 18th birthday." Logan drops his head. Roman stiffens.
"You-you don’t have to tell that if you don't want to guys."
Logan waves his hand off as if it was nothing and Patton nervously shifts on his seat. No one is interested in the game anymore.
"It was me who found him actually..." Logan sighs and takes off the glasses to rub the corners of his eyes "He asked me to deliver some book or maybe it was a magazine to his house. I arrived a little bit earlier because I wanted to avoid crossing paths with his mother. We don't like each other. Actually she doesn't like anyone which is probably one of the reasons of his state."
"Stupid bitch." mutters Patton under his breath and Roman is out of breath. This is the first time he has heard Patton cursing.
"Agreed but back to the story..." Logan coughs to gain back Roman's attention "So I climbed upstairs and I don't know... In the middle of the staircase some bad feeling hit me so I started running. The doors were opened and it made me freak out even more. I remember that there were a lot of papers on the ground and Virgil's cat almost ran away but I couldn't care less. I completely lost my mind and was running from a room to a room shouting his name. I found him in the last room. Oh God I will never forget this..." Logan hid face in his arms and Patton protectively wrapped his arm around his boyfriend. Logan sobbed soundlessly "He was standing there... On a chair... It was white and i remember clearly it was the only white thing in his room... He had this ridiculous purple shirt with tears on and... and... his neck... He was surprised... It was the only emotion that I could see on his face. Surprise. He didn't expect me there. I saw that in his eyes. Maybe that surprise is what let me save him... I've never cried like I cried back then w-when he took off that rope and let me hug him... My... My best friend Roman... He planned killing myself and I haven't even noticed."
Roman remains silent letting Logan cry as much as he wants to. Patton sobs quietly too. Small but numerous rain drops start hitting the surface of the glass. It sounds like a melody. Roman looks outside. He wonders if Virgil looks at the rain now too. And if he does what does he think about.
---
Next morning is the first morning for Roman when he oversleeps his alarm. All three of them to be more precise. Luckily he arrives to the theater on time but he had to skip the breakfast. And he’s hungry. Like, really hungry. His stomach is louder than the whole orchestra to the point that one of the actors delicately suggests him to take a break and go grab something to eat. Roman fights with the urge to refuse, since the first performance is in few days, but his basic needs win over the responsibility. The weather is nice after the rain, the air is fresh and it's not so cold, so he decides to take a walk to the shopping quarter nearby. He has been there a few times and he knows that there's a place which serves amazing lunch. Roman crosses street after street when suddenly a familiar purple hair grabs his attention. He doesn't know what makes him follow Virgil instead of going to the panini heaven but he does. He follows Virgil carefully, paying attention to keep the distance. To his utter surprise Virgil stops in front of the entrance of a place which looks like... well... like a brothel.
Not that Roman minds. No of course, everybody has their needs but... he's shocked. He didn't suspect Virgil is the type of person to go to get laid at... 10 am. From behind the dumpster he watches as Virgil rocks back and forward on his toes. He looks so small. And so lost. So out of place. Suddenly he takes his phone out of the pocket and quickly types something in. He then sits back under the wall and Roman at this point has really no idea what is going on but he's willing to wait and see. After few minutes the door swing open and Virgil gets up to be almost immediately wrapped in a tight hug by some girl. Roman can't see it clearly from this distance but he looks a little bit older than Virgil. She is wearing short skirt and big jacket. Seemingly she's on a break but Roman can't take that for sure. Virgil says something and girl takes some time to think before reply. Virgil grins and nods. He quickly pulls out his phone and hands it to girl. She types something and disappears back in the building.
Roman frowns trying to connect the dots. Was it that girl who Virgil is "dating" according to Patton? But Roman knows that Virgil has a crush on Patton? So he was playing just distracting himself with that girl? Roman has just casually assumed that Virgil was gay after noticing his crush on Patton but after all... But did the event he has just witnessed implied any romantic relationship?
"What are you doing here?" asks a voice from above and Roman looks up to see very confused Virgil himself. Apparently Roman got so lost in thoughts that he hasn't even noticed that Virgil was going this way.
"I-I saw you in the streets and..." Roman stutters and gets up from the space between two dumpsters.
"And you stalked me?" Virgil's eyebrow raises a little bit.
"No! Nonononono, I was just walking this way!" Roman blushes deeply trying to wiggle out of the awkward situation.
"And two bins were the place where you were going?" says Virgil sarcastically crossing arms on his chest "Sorry, I don't believe you Romeo." he adds dryly.
Roman knows that there's no point in pretending. He should have known that from the beginning.
"Sorry..." he admits bashfully, feeling hotness blooming on his cheeks. Virgil looks at Roman for a while behind the bangs before he breaks into giggle.
"You should have seen your face." he says finally and Roman blushes even harder. Virgil bits his lips "I forgive you, don't worry." he sighs finally. "It was nice seeing you Roman." he declares and takes a step forward when Roman grabs his hand. Virgil's looks at him shocked "Dude, you gotta stop touching me so randomly, ever heard of space bubble?" he snaps and Roman immediately takes his hand back.
"Sorry, I was... I was just wondering if I could make it all up to you by treating you with lunch." he rubs the back of his neck. He can't remember when was the last time he got so shy so quickly. Because of a minor in addition.
Virgil clicks his tongue. The sound rolls across the empty alley.
"You do realize it's not even noon?" he replies with a question.
"A late breakfast then." Roman smiles shyly and looks at Virgil. To his utter surprise Virgil's eyes travel from Roman's face down to his toes. Is he checking me out?
"Sure why not." puffs Virgil and starts walking down the alley not waiting for Roman. The latter quickly jogs to him. They walk in silence for a while before Roman finally takes courage to ask Virgil:
"Not to sound rude but were you checking me out just few minutes ago?" with a corner of his eye his looks at Virgil. His face expression doesn't change even in the slightest, he still looks like a bored, a little bit sleepy puppy.
"Nope."
"It looked like you were checking me out though..." Roman doesn't plan on giving up so easily.
"You wish..." Virgil smirks slightly and Roman's heart twitches. He shakes his head. He couldn't possibly hope for Virgil to check him out, did he?
"How would you react if I did wish that?" he grins brightly sensing a good moment to tease this emo boy.
Virgil's head jerks up. Roman with surprise notices a pastel pink blush on his cheeks.
"I mean... I-I guess... You know... I mean... I'm not exactly..." he stutters awkwardly and Roman can't help but burst into giggles. His embarrassment was totally worth it. Virgil grunts "Fucking bastard..." he mumbles to himself which causes Roman to burst into another wave of laughter. That was almost too easy.
Roman keeps on giggling and Virgil keeps on grunting angrily until they arrive to the cafe Roman intended to go on the first place. He stands in the line to order something when he notices that Virgil shifts awkwardly on his spot.
"What's up Gloomy? Come, pick something. I will take an order." Roman snaps his fingers in front of Virgil's eyes.
"I... Ekehm, I didn't think you were serious about this. I mean... I should probably pay for myself but I don't really have any cash on me so..." he rubs his arm and his gaze once again lands on the ground. Roman can't help but smile softly.
"Of course I was serious. It's my treat!" he says smoothly "How about I will pick something for you and you will sit down and wait for me? Okay?" his words somehow manage Virgil to look up for a tiny bit of second before his eyes drop down again. He nods quietly and scans the room looking for some free spot. He finally notices one in the corner of the room and rushes to sit there, when he does so he looks up and sends awkward thumbs up to Roman, before pulling out his phone.
Roman grins to himself. Virgil is really adorable. Despite that whole emo look, he's really adorable. Roman instantly feels that it is just the part of Virgil's personality. Virgil could be 40 and would still give that kind of vibes, no matter how hard he tried to hide that. Roman sighs softly orders two brunches for him and Virgil. He doesn't really know what Virgil likes so he decides to stick with his usual order. He takes the tray and carefully walks to the table, paying attention not to spill the coffee in the mugs. He places the tray down.
"You sure you don't want me to give you money for that?" asks Virgil quietly with his eyes glued on the phone. Roman starts to suspect that this is his defensive position. That way he doesn't have to look into the other's person eyes while talking.
"Yeah I'm sure." chuckles Roman and takes a bite of warm toast with avocado. Virgil puts down his phone and eyes the brunch in front of him.
"So you feed me with greens too?" he asks finally but reluctantly picks up the fork.
Roman smiles.
"Not intentionally. I just got you something I like." he watches Virgil munching the meal and with pleasure observes that his lips twitch up a little bit.
"It's okay... I guess..." hums Virgil and puts another bite into his mouth. "Don't smile at me, you look creepy." he adds and Roman bites his lips. He definitely has a soft spot for some of Virgil's actions. They stay silent until both of them finish eating. Roman glances at the clock, he still have a little bit of time before going back to work.
He props his elbows on the table and rest chin on his tangles fingers.
"So Virgil... Will you tell me what where you doing there?" he asks carefully. Virgil glances at him and takes a sip of his coffee. His purple nails contrast with the white mug he's holding.
"Why would I? It has nothing to do with you." he watches Roman carefully. His dark eyes are half-closed but the whites are still clearly visible between heavy layers of dark make-up.
"I'm just curious." Roman adjusts on his seat.
"Hmm... Curiosity killed the cat Roman. And I would know. I have a cat and she's getting herself into dangerous situations all the time." Virgil look through the window.
"Don't try changing the subject." sings Roman quietly and Virgil snorts.
"You're like Disney prince." he states with a great dose of irony "You sing well, you look good, you have pleasant voice..." his voice is quiet, slowly drifting more and more distant. Roman feels that his cheeks once again grow red. This is a strange feeling because normally he's used to receiving such a compliments. They just sound... oddly satisfying when coming from Virgil.
"Well, if you wanted my number you could just ask." Roman winks, trying to keep up his facade. Virgil glimpses at him and snorts.
"I didn't mean it like that prince charming."
"I know, you're just trying to escape from replying to my question." Roman straightens up and sends Virgil the most angelic smile he can. They stare at each other for few moments before Virgil finally sighs a quiet "Fine".
"It's nothing big though. Cynthia is just my friend. I got to know her through my lovely mother. Just like you saw Cynthia works at her place. She's a little bit like an older sister to me. But not in the annoying way like Patton wants to be my brother or whatever family shit he's up to. Anyway she's my fake girlfriend. You know. In front of my mum. That's all. I needed to confirm something with her." states Virgil calmly. His voice is completely ripped of emotions and icy cold. Roman blinks.
"But... That means that..." he stutters confused.
"Yep. Cynthia's a prostitute at my mommy's brothel and at the same time pretends to be my girlfriend. Hope you're satisfied now." Virgil leans back on his chair and taps his fingers against the table.
"Wait. Let me sort it..." Roman gently rubs his forehead and closes his eyes "So you fake dating a prostitute who works at your mother's... place? Sorry but all of these sounds just pointless I mean..." he opens his eyes trying to find answers in Virgil's ones.
Virgil shrugs.
"It works for me, Cynthia and mum." Roman can sense a little bit of poison in Virgil's voice whenever he's mentioning his mother "Mommy doesn't like the idea of... you know... boys coming anywhere near me ever since she found out that I may or may not swing both ways. Except that I don't. I'm just as straight as fucking polygon.” He laughs, so this is just as Roman has suspected before “Unless the male I know is obviously straight I shouldn't really come close to him. So I figured out that if I fake to have a girlfriend mommy would give me a slack. Cynthia just happened to be right person on the right place."
Roman tries to adjust all the information. So: Virgil's mother owns a brothel. She's homophobic. Virgil is 100% gay. Also has a crush on Patton who treats him as a son and on the top of that Virgil pretends to date a prostitute. That's quite a lot.
"How about Patton and Logan though?" asks Roman curiously. I mean, let's be honest Patton is the most obvious gay Roman has ever met.
"I kept them a secret until I was 18. She didn't give a fuck about my therapy anyway."
"Oh." Roman is speechless "I'm sorry..." he adds.
"Don't be. I'm actually glad she's like that. Except you know... like homophobia. But I can deal with that too. She hasn't liked me even before she found out about that."
Roman looks at Virgil puzzled and Virgil grinds at him bitterly. He points his long pale finger at his own chest.
"This emo piece of shit was an accident and is reminded about that every day."
Suddenly Roman regrets he has even brought up the subject at the first place. He frowns and sinks into his seat not knowing what to say. Virgil shakes his head as if he was deeply disappointed.
"Don't you dare to pity me, Ro." he says huskily and Roman looks up. Suddenly Virgil looks like he was at least 10 years older than he is in reality "It's the one thing I can't stand in people. When they pity me. I'm okay. It's my reality Roman, really. It's been my reality for years and yes, I had some major crisis but I'm really used to that. People are a little bit like puzzles. Even if they at the end show one picture, it doesn't mean that every piece clicks with the other. That's how it is between me and my mother." he leans a little bit closer, staring into his dark nails "We create each other pictures but we just don't stick together. I've accepted that long time ago. I just wish I realized that earlier to be honest. When I was a kid for example." He stretches his arms and looks at Roman though the space between his fingers. "So don't pity me. Please. Just take this story and accept it as fucked up as it is." He rests the hand on the table.
Roman opens his mouth to say something when two girls walk over to their table. Virgil immediately sinks into his baggy clothes. Roman raises one eyebrow.
"How may I be in your assistance?" he asks softly, almost sure what the next question will be. Girls giggle quietly before one of them, the taller one with long brown hair leans over the table (completely ignoring Virgil who’s sitting across it).
"I was wondering if by any chance I could ask you for a cup of tea or coffee." she asks smiling sweetly.
Roman tries to surpass a chuckle. Years of being gay and some people still don't seem to catch his rainbow vibes.
"My lovely..." he purrs softly, knowing exactly what kind of effect it will have. He gently grabs girl's hand "I would love to but I'm afraid you may expect some kind of romantic interaction with me. And honey, believe me, this Prince is very, very gay." he smirks watching girl's reaction. Her skin immediately changes color to dark red and she slips off the table.
"Oh my god I'm so sorry!" she stutters "I've just assumed that..." she glimpses and Virgil "And oh shit, you're in the middle of... Oh my god! I'm so so sorry! Come on Lisa, we gotta go!" she grabs her friend's hand and bows deeply in Roman direction "I'm really sorry!" he adds and disappears behind the door.
Roman smiles to himself and shifts his gaze at Virgil. To his utter surprise the younger male is clearly blushing.
"Virgil?" asks Roman "Did something happen?"
"N-nothing." Virgil hides half of his face behind the sleeve of his jacket.
"Doesn't seem like nothing." Roman leans a little bit.
Virgil does a chaotic movement with his hand, revealing his red shaded face.
"It's just... They assumed that... You know that we're a couple and I... I didn't react and oh gosh..." he hides his face in his hands "That must be so embarrassing to you. I'm sorry I knew that it was bad idea to come here." He chokes on his own words.
Roman instantly gets up and in a matter of seconds his crouches down next to Virgil. He gently touches his crossed thighs and rubs his back. He has lived for long enough to know that panic attacks have many faces but all of them are same terrifying. Virgil leans a little bit, almost lying his chest on his own legs and Roman keeps rubbing his back. From time to time he feels soundless sobs under his fingers.
"Breathe is, breathe out Virgil... That's right... You're doing amazing... In for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, out for 8 seconds." he whispers quietly to his ear, not paying attention to the glimpses they get from people in the cafe. He couldn't care less about it. After few long minutes Virgil finally calms down and straightens up.
"I'm sorry." he mumbles quietly.
"There's nothing to be sorry about Virgil. Are you sure you're okay?" asks Roman concerned before getting up from the ground. Virgil nods and gets up from his seat.
"I would rather leave though."
"Of course dearest." Roman snaps his fingers and quickly pull on his bomber jacket. They rush out of the cafe. This time it's Virgil who leads the way. Roman takes his opportunity and quickly texts his assistant that he has decided to take a day off today. He knows that he's in no obligation to go with Virgil wherever he's going but he just feels like it.
They end up in some old, park on an bench. Virgil clearly knows the place, carefully picking the spot they sit at. Both of his legs land on the bench and he stretches out his arms once again. The sun lights his pale skin through the space between the leafs. Roman suggestively pats his lap and after a moment of hesitation Virgil lies his head down on Roman's thigh. He's not looking at Roman and Roman's not looking at him. They just happen to stay like that for some time. The sun moves slowly across the sky. In the meantime Roman's hand finds its way to Virgil's hair. He play with little purple streaks.
Virgil sighs.
"Sorry for ruining your day."
"You didn't ruin it at all." replies Roman almost immediately.
"Yeah, right. You dreamed of spending a half of a day with unstable child." snorts Virgil.
"You're not a child." says Roman and Virgil immediately shifts his head. His eyes are wide-opened, completely revealed as his bangs fell everywhere around his face. Roman notices that Virgil has really nice, high forehead and his whole face in general is rather... handsome.
"Wow, you're serious." grunts Virgil but bites his lips trying to hide the small smile forming on his lips. Roman finds it utterly adorable.
"You were wrong back then by the way." he takes his chance to clear up the situation. He’s been thinking about that since they left the cafe.
Virgil raises his eyebrow, showing that Roman has his interest. Roman clears his throat and tears his gaze away from Virgil who still lies on his laps.
"I wouldn't be ashamed even if I was in the middle of a date with you. Hell no, I would be proudly showing you off to the world, claiming everyone that you are my emo boyfriend." finishes Roman.
Virgil gets up not looking into his eyes.
"Like hell you would." he mumbles sarcastically, hiding his face between his legs. The position Roman has seen before. Fear crawls down his throat. If Virgil's gonna cry... Roman lies his hand on Virgil shoulder and gently tugs him to face him. To his relief, he's not crying. He just looks... broken.
"What makes you think so?" asks Roman with concern.
"Because the only person who would be proudly dating me is in a happy relationship with my best friend." Virgil's voice breaks a little bit but no other sound comes out of his mind.
"Now, you can't know that Virgil." pouts Roman and brings Virgil's chin up.
Virgil cracks a smile.
"That's exactly what Patton would say." he says sadly.
"Well..." Roman's heart is pounding very loudly and he's almost sure Virgil can hear that "Maybe Patton and I have more in common than you think."
Virgil sighs and moves away from Roman.
"Can't tell that yet." he states calmly and pulls out his phone "Oh, look at the time. I have to go!" he gets up awkwardly "I have a date with Cynthia and my mum." he shoots a quick wink at Roman and quickly runs down the hill.
Roman watches Virgil moving away and away from him before curling on the bench. He has few things to ponder about.