#communication apprehension

[perpetualvisionary]

If I initiate a casual conversation with you and you brush me off, I will never make an attempt to speak to you again.

[matzohball]

In public speaking class the teacher arranges us around the classroom based on our anxiety about public speaking and then wants us to come out and publicly speak about why we don’t like public speaking? Like HELLO YES I AM STANDING IN FRONT OF THE CLASSROOM ALREADY WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME

[mistresschoc-blog]

I'm so sick of people in my group...I'm so sick of stupid incompetent ass holes who don't give a shit. Can't I just do this bloody thing in my own at my own pace. I can't even stand up for myself.

[anaccidentalmasterpiece]

I survived and it was super helpful because my speech was extremely short. D; however I now have a week or so to work on it c:

[mizzmizzerie]

So I have communication apprehension and social anxiety.

I have a big paper in my communication class due in...three days.

I almost don't want to read the articles because I don't want to know how screwed up I am...

[edgeofmyporch]

Day 150

Totally crashed during Mass Comm Law...I kept fighting for consciousness and noticing that I had typed very strange things in my notes. Dang it. At least I know what we talked about. 

Business and Professional Comm wasn't the most exciting thing at the beginning. I walked up the stairs and legitimately fell asleep on Dani's shoulder. We took notes on Communication Apprehension, which it seems I have...

I scored a 76 out of 120...

My problem is more like large group and meeting stuff. I'm generally pretty good if I know what I'm talking about and have had a long time to prepare, but I very much dislike just hopping up and talking about something. I've never been good at that... On the bright side, I'm really good at interpersonal communication! Which is really obvious because I literally talk to everyone. Too bad I can't just give speeches to random strangers, individually.

At the end of class, we had to give a persuasive speech trying to get a very real $10. Mine was dumb. I said I needed it for Wesli's birthday. Blegh. I hate impromptu speeches.

Went to The Market with Jared and Dani. Met Kristen and Meredith there. Had a calzone, which was actually really good. Dani, Kristen, and I headed back to Gordon after a little bit. I tried to read part of an article before heading to Mass Media Theories and Society. 

Class was ok. I didn't get called on, so that was nice. I now have the textbook printed out though, so I won't have to rely on the internet if I'm looking for something, thank goodness. One benefit to working at The Sharp: free/unlimited paper. 

Walked back to Gordon with Maddie. Dani caught me in the lobby and made me go work out with her. April came, too.

Did a bunch of ab and leg stuff. 

Really wonderful weather. Seriously, the best: about sixty, overcast and kinda dark, light rain, and a light wind. It was really exciting. 

Back in Gordon, I watched the end of Gamer with Cory, Becky, Wesli, and Ethan. April went to shower, and I changed clothes, then we headed to Sam's place for food. Apparently a LARGE order of chicken strips is only ONE extra strip and it's a whole freaking more dollar! Ridiculous!

Ate in the kitchen, where everyone seemed to have congregated...Melissa came in after a while. April and I had a war with her V8 bottle. I chased her down the hall to throw it at her, she locked herself in her room afterward, then snuck up on me in the kitchen and got me...this resulted in us wrestling each other on the floor. I definitely won, but she got my bracelet...so I traded back.

Then I left for work, where I did statistics homework and got asked to tutor someone in it. She offered to pay me, so we'll see how this works out. Skyped Taylor for a bit to help her with College Algebra homework. To my surprise, I actually knew what I was doing! Success! Resumed my post at the front desk for the last bit, then headed home.

Party in Wesli's room! Sat on the floor and started watching Top 100 Greatest Women in Music. Cory and I ran to Sam's Place to get drinks, then came back. Made fun of Melissa. Sarah helped me with stats homework. I made Cory and Destin bluetooth me pictures. Wesli went to get She's the Man from her car, but then we decided not to watch it because it was too late. 

Ended the night with this. It's beautiful. Thank you, Connie.

[thecautionarywhale]

today.

I had my public speaking class and we were talking about the purposes of public speaking, motives to communicate and then we started talking about the two reasons people avoid communication. 1. Fear 2. No motive  Then we talked about the basic types of shyness and I showed my friend durring break and he told me that I was: 1. Skill Deficient; is factored out of fear and they don't talk to people because they don't feel like they are up to par with the other person. Whether it be education wise or appearance wise. They don't feel good enough.  2. Social Introvert; is factored from lack of motivation, they appear to be shy in situations where they have no motive to communicate.  but I disagree I think I just have a Communication Apprehension which is the fear or anxiety associated with either real or anticipated communication with another person or persons. There are four different types of C.A. but I'm the first. 1. C.A. as a trait (personality) which pretty much means I get nervous talking to anybody. I'm not completely shy, C.A.'s are small forms of shyness. I'm just afraid of being judged and rejected. I make up excuses to not talk to people because it makes things easier. I don't know this was pointless, but if you actually went through and read this whole thing then thank you for your time, you're amazing :)