#corvo rants

[mbcorvo-author]

I rate my summer (September included) with a "0/10 awful".

Found a job where they never let me have a single day off, always worked twice the contractual weekly hours and never got paid for the overtime and worked rest days, got a mental breakdown because when I simply asked why the overtime and extra days weren't in my paycheck they started with mobbing and putting me in situation of heavy stress that I got sick and had to take sick leave.

Then a blackout in the whole street caused by a power surge fried my desktop pc when I didn't have a backup of any single file and the only recovered data where the ones in the secondary hdd that is where I used to store unimportant crap. Losing all the important things and my projects.

Of course this last setback worsened my mental health that was slowly getting better after the shitty work experience.

[mbcorvo-author]

I tried to re-read my wips, to refresh my memories of them and try to get back into writing and...

Feels like I’m reading someone else’s work? Why? Why now my works feel so...not-me?

Why I don’t recognize my own works?

It’s sad and frustrating.

And doesn’t help my writing block

[mbcorvo-author]

wtf tumblr

I don’t know why, but every time I open Tumblr on my netbook it shows this weird thing in place of my usual avatar.

I tried to refresh and the icon on the dashboard returns to normal but the one in the drop down menu doesn’t.

I don’t know why it happens and what to do. On my desktop pc and on my phone app this doesn’t happen. Nor in my old laptop. Only when I’m on the netbook...so this is really wtf. I’ll try to log out and then log back in to see if this is fixed and then I’ll re-upload my usual avatar.

Wtf

[mbcorvo-author]

That moment when you want to work on your wip but at the same time you don’t want to work on your wip...

[mbcorvo-author]

Today I wanted to do some research for the DeepLore™ of Beyond the Veil, but then I got stuck in a loop of “Am I doing this correctly?” because in my story I’m mixing stuff from different mythologies and folklores and I fear that I’m not doing it right.

But at the same time, the other side of me is telling me “I think you are doing good...and anyways, I’m pretty sure that you’ll never complete this wip and only you will know what there is inside, so if you like it it’s okay”.

And...I’m not sure anymore on what to do? Maybe I could continue like this and then if I’ll complete the novel, search for some “sensivity readers” and beta readers that could check if I did it wrong so I’ll be able to fix.

Because right now I’m creating lore and worldbuilding and I still need to fix the plot and after that I still have to write the story...so I don’t actually have much decided and still everything in a form of a bunch of ideas in my mind.

Uhh...yeah, maybe as for now I could continue like this and when I’ll have more work done I could search for someone that could help me check if I did something wrong.

[mbcorvo-author]

ahhhh, whatever! I'm tired to see that random drabble in my files folder so I guess I'll post it as it is and whatever!

[mbcorvo-author]

Having to deal with indifferent librarians this morning kind of spoiled the mood for the whole day.

I was happy to have had the idea of donating my old comics (at least, a good chunk of my collection) to the library since I need to make space in my old room, but seeing the lack of interest and not even bothering to answer me when I asked if they would have liked a list of titles and authors to check if they already had them or not… it was disappointing.

I still remember when I was like idk probably 13 or 14 and I donated my full collection of Geronimo Stilton's books and received a mail thanking me for the big donation and how it made me proud… idk I guess I had my expectations skewed.

Now I don't want to donate them anymore because I feel like it won't be an appreciated thing. I'm not asking for something big. Just a thank you. Not a "bring them here and we'll see" when I asked if they needed the list and a "now I need to figure out how to catalogue them" while taking the handful I left them. A simple "thank you". And maybe also a fucking "goodbye" when I said it going away. No, I guess that messaging on whatsapp was more important.

Fuck it, I'll put them for sale online. I wanted to donate them because I cared about those comics but whatever.

[mbcorvo-author]

Me: I need to dust off my French and maybe give German another try, maybe that'll help me find a job My Brain: do you remember when you didn't use the dictionary during Latin tests? Good times. And that year that you did that extra course of Greek and missed half of it and never studied but were able to pass with a good mark? Good times. Too bad I won't learn anything else like that.