#couch forts

[suck-it-winter]

Feb 4th - Couch Fort Day

(This is one of several weekly Suck It, Winter holidays, which run from the beginning of January to the end of March. You can read about them here.)

Couch fort! COUCH FORT. Couch forrrrrrt. When you’re spending a lot of time cooped up inside, dramatically changing, even temporarily, what your space looks like is a real mood lift. Creating an uber-cozy nest of blankets and pillows and retreating into it with a book and mug of tea is a comforting middle finger to the very idea of February.

Suggestions for maximum structural integrity: 

- Central pole! Coat rack, lamp, couch turned on its end (I actually did this in college once, to create a couch/blanket fort massive enough that seven people could sleep in it), whatever you have on hand: if you can erect a central pillar, you can make a circus tent out of sheets that will be SPACIOUS AS HECK.

- Safety pin attachments! Use safety pins to anchor sheets to couches, cushions, other blankets, etc. Especially important if your household has cats who may attempt to nap on the blankets, leading to premature fort collapse.

- Lighting! A properly insulated blanket fort will be thick enough that, for maximum ~ambiance~, you may wish to move a flashlight, lantern, or other source of lighting into your fort. This is where a coat rack central pillar comes in doubly handy as a hanging post for improvised lanterns.

GO FORTH AND ARCHITECT WITH ALL GOOD CHEER.

[esperacchiusxvodkaxandguns]

❝ Hey, a little help with movin’ the couch. We’re makin’ a fort. ❞

Sanya laughed from where he was reading. "Of course I vill help you. I am all for couch forts." He got off his bed and slowly followed Michael downstairs, where some of the children were gathered around a pile of blankets. 

"Vhere do you vant it?" He placed his book on the stair and waited for directions. 

[thecouchfandom]

[darkwizardjamesmason]

The Chronicles of Mike Kittyman #25

I finally updated.

----

Heroic Sleepover

Announcer: Boy, I sure am glad I was given two months vacation for that big event that took place. Y’know, the recent one that we're avoiding the name of, to keep this chapter from becoming dated? It was the 2012 Summer Olympics! But that wasn’t the reason there wasn’t a new chapter in these two months. It’s because the writer got laz-- Mike: So John, did you figure out how that guy’s pocket dimension worked? John: Oh, was I supposed to do that? Hang on, I’ll go back and study it. *Warp!* *Five-seconds-later warp!* Alex: That was fast. The Arch Mage: I work fast. Also? I’m a wizard. Mike: So how does it work? The Arch Mage: I’ll study it later. I’m tired. Mike: ...doesn’t it take you like five seconds to study things? The Arch Mage Turning To John: *mumbly noises* *while he lies down on the table* Mike: Eh, you're right. What’s on TV? *switch ON!* Anchorwoman: And in other news, this guy discusses why everyone who disagrees with him about anything sucks. Mike: *switch OFF!* Oh, right. Let's check the internet. Internet Article: Why everyone who disagrees with me on anything sucks! Mike: Welp, that sucks. Let's go watch a video review. Announcer: Fifteen to forty-five minutes later... Alex: I like *INSERT INTERNET REVIEWER HERE!* And by far, that review of *INSERT THING HERE!* was my favorite of their reviews! Mike: Well I prefer the *INSERT ANOTHER THING HERE!* review, and-- Hey, actually, has there been an emergency that requires us? *checks the police phone* ...oh. No. ...is anyone else BORED? John: Eh, I’m too tired to care. Mike: Well, what do we do now? Alex: Sleep? Mike: Nah, I’ve done that already. I want to do something, but nothing's happening! Announcer: Well, you *could* go out and look for crimes, and even prevent some! Alex: We could build a pillow fort. Announcer: I figured that was the case. I wonder if I have the power to control the story? Mike: Well we *could* go out and look for crimes, and even prevent some... but your idea works too. Announcer: No, if I was in control I wouldn’t have this happen. Mike: Okay, I could make a pillow fort-- Alex: WHICH WILL NOT STAND AGAINST MY COUCH CUSHION FORT! *So she gets up-- oh, or she doesn’t?* Oh, excuse me Mike, did you want to keep laying on me? Mike: Well... nah, I’ll go make that pillow fort now. *Okay, now he definitely gets up. These people should make up their minds before they do something.* Alex: Okay, fort time! Oh, there’s only two cushions... eh, that’s okay, I’ve made a fort out of less. Announcer: ...how much less? John: I could provide you with more couch cushions if I wasn’t tired. Or if I felt like it. Alex: Just turn this to the left and... there we go! Announcer: JEEZ! That thing is more impressive than actual forts! Hey, we are getting video of this, right? Oh good, I'dI hate to have anyone miss it. Mike: Okay, I have pillo-- Huh, nice fort. Announcer: …huh? Oh right! A few minutes later. Alex: Now I’ve seen many a fort in my day but these two forts are the best forts I’ve ever done see! Mike: So now what? Alex: ... John: Okay, I think I’m ready. Alex: You want to help me figure out what to do? The Arch Mage: No, I mean ready to study that information I got. Remember? Mike: So how did the guy make his own pocket dimension thingy? The Arch Mage: Hmmmm... Mike: … The Arch Mage: Hmmm... Mike: … The Arch Mage: Hmmmmmmmmmmmm... Announcer: Oh for fu-- TELL US ALREAD-- Alex: It’s based off your own mind. Y'know, like desires and fears and mental traumas. Something like that? The Arch Mage: That’s... correct! How did you know? Alex: I’ve seen so much stuff where that's the case, it’s pretty much the rule. Announcer: ...okay then, that told us a lot. Thank you. Mike: So what does it mean for us? The Arch Mage: Well... not really much right now. I’d have to study it more first. Alex: How long will that take? The Arch Mage: ...until I can field test it, a while. Mike: I get what you're saying, and I’m ready! Alex: Me too! The Arch Mage: Great! Whose mind do we explore? Announcer: …wait, you're ending this now? We don’t get to explore the characters' backstories or the darkness within? Man, I hate cliffhangers that take way too long to resolve, especially if the author takes way too long to write it. Lazy pri-- END! ---- Author's Note: Welp, I hope that wasn’t too disappointing for those who waited. For those on tumblr who waited one month instead of two, get used to disappointment.