This is the final part of this short series (but not of Crook I promise you that) Apologies for taking so long, I’ve been goin thru it ngl.
Warning: excessive swearing, not much else, not proofread i think. I went over it idk how many times.
Dividers by: @cafekitsune
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Your three victims, while helping you plan something for Ghost's demise, showed no mercy with their cold shoulders.
It’s a bit heartbreaking but nothing extreme.
Just some offhand comments.
“Hi, Johnny.”
“Oh, so sweet today. Unlike the past week where ye were conspiring behind my back."
"Gaz would you try this-"
"Oh did you make it yourself or is someone else taking the credit?"
"Price-"
"Can't help you with the others, Crook. Have to let it drain out of their systems."
at least they were being civil. Even with the promise of ending your punishment as soon as they get Ghost with their plan.
Speaking of a plan-
Tomorrow was the final day. the bet ended at 5 pm on the dot- 17:00 hours. Which meant you had to get Ghost to eat SOMETHING of yours before then.
Even though this was such an elite task force, the trio could not find a single way to get him to voluntarily chew up and digest a treat of yours before time was up.
Gaz suggested crying to him.
"Do I look like a fucking toddler? I'm not putting the waterworks."
Soap suggested restraining him.
"Sure I can just force him to chew and swallow a fucking cupcake."
Price suggested a smoothie.
"That...wait that could work."
So here you were, figuring out how to blend a sweet treat of yours into a fruit smoothie. Cause lord knows you won't get him to agree to a milkshake.
The idea seems simple, just blend like a cookie into a berry smoothie, but this is Simon.
He's gonna know.
How would he know?
He'll know.
Paul suggested making a yogurt-like treat and mixing it in after you explained your dilemma. (He saw you staring at the blender with fruits just sitting there. Thought you just about lost it when you kept picking up and putting down a fucking strawberry.)
Technically you would be cheating. Cause you know...you can't make yogurt from scratch that fast.
But you can freeze it and worry about it tomorrow.
So that's what you did while the rest of your crew worked around you.
You make it oh so pretty that you decided to only keep two of them for the smoothie batch and serve the rest of the treats for dessert.
The soldiers love it so much. such a creamy texture with every bite. It was essentially just a yogurt/chocolate bark thing.
Anyways
tomorrow morning comes around, and you had Lottie help you blend out all the smoothies into drinking cups. You were glad you didn't make a lot of these since you were using the drinking cups.
To identify the batches with the desert blended into it, you used green straws. The rest were given other colors.
Sure enough, as you restock them, you could feel a presence behind you.
You already knew who it was.
"You smell gross."
Ghost scoffs. "Do I now? Expected me to be smellin' like a bunch of roses?"
"I expected peonies at least."
He lets out a small hum, peeking over your shoulder.
"That count?"
The question confuses you before you understand he's talking about the smoothies.
"Oh, well I would think so considering the others grabbed one."
You pick one up. One with a green straw.
"Care for one?"
Ghost hums, as if he's in thought.
You almost think you got him, as you feel movement behind you.
However, he doesn't take the drink from your hand. He grabs a whole new glass right from the display.
"Thanks, love."
You can't help but blink in silence as he takes a sip and makes a noise of satisfaction. "Blueberry. One of my favorites from you."
You grin slowly, his knowing eyes peering into yours. "I'm so glad to hear."
You have a few more tricks up your sleeve.
Course he wasn't going to forget your conversation in his office.
You know better.
You're quick to take two of the 'contaminated' drinks and hide them in the fridge before thinking of different ways to get him to drink one.
Sending a quick text, you wait in the kitchen while everyone takes a small break after breakfast.
Sure enough, the door to the entrance swings open, and Soap's fluffy mohawk appears in your view.
"He didn't take the bait-"
"We know. Yer terrible at this."
"Pardon?"
Johnny laughs, walking over to wrap an arm around your waist.
"Lt sat with us, entertaining us with the idea of you," He flexes two of his fingers as quotations, "'poisoning' him."
"What?!"
"Ye cannae be too obvious like that."
He was right.
The most frustrating part-
He was drinking them.
Just not the ones you NEEDED HIM TO DRINK.
Eventually, time catches up to you. You're an hour to the end.
You're gonna have to do this the hard way.
Ghost likes his tea just as sweet as your treats.
So when he enters his office, briefly scanning the room, his eyes land on the chilled smoothie in the center of his desk.
He pauses, and that's when you decide to make yourself known.
The door behind him swings shut but he doesn't flinch.
No, instead he sighs, walks to his desk, and sets his tea down.
"What're you gonna do crook? Force feed me this crap?"
You gasp in offense. "crap?!"
"It's not like you put your blood sweat n' tears into this, love."
"You don't have to be so-"
"I'm not drinkin' it."
You stare at each other for a hot minute. It isn't until you move a chair against the wall to the front of his desk does he breaks his stare and rolls his eyes.
"Don't you have work to do?"
"Oh, so you don't want me here?"
"You know what?" The lieutenant sighs, "Sit there and look pretty all you want."
Ghost pulls his balaclava up to his nose, and reaches for the tea, which seemed more of a red tint than his normal creamy brown.
But for some reason he just never noticed.
Till he took a sip that is.
At first, he swallows and hums in satisfaction but as soon as the ceramic cup hits its coaster, his body looks as if it's taking a screenshot.
Oh, you hope he forgives you.
"What-" he coughs as soon as any noise is leaving his mouth, "what the fuck-?"
"I'm sorry-" You start. "I promise it's not poison or anything it's uhm..." You trail off as you reach in your pocket.
And to Simon's absolute astonishment, you pull out a tiny plastic back of dark red powder.
In tiny yet bold print: 'reaper dust'
"You're gonna wanna drink something fast."
He's huffing and coughing in front of you.
Granted he never would ever assume that you would poison him. I mean you didn't but you might as well have.
His mouth is on fucking fire.
The spice from the bag is spreading through his body, he never once thought he could feel the pain of spice in his toes.
"How the *cough cough* fuck-"
You didn't think it would work honestly. But with the help of Price, you kept Ghost out of the rec room long enough to open a few of the tea bags and pour some of the chili powder into the bags.
Just a tiny amount.
You didn't want to kill him after all.
You watch as he brushes by you, ripping open the tiny fridge he had, and stifle a laugh.
You removed all of his water bottles. There was only one baby in there waiting for him.
However, drinking it just made it a tiny bit worse.
At this point, Ghost is huffing and hiccuping over to his desk.
He's glaring at the glass before he looks up with a pointed finger.
"What's in this?"
"I think you know."
"Why?"
You shrug, the same look of nervousness still printed on your face.
"I wanted in, and I don't know... the way you answered me was...rude!"
Another hiccup sounds from the Lieutenant. Which is followed by a loud groan. "I might throw up."
"Should I get-"
"No." He snaps. "if I do you're cleaning it up. Fucks sake."
You watch as he stands still, rigid in place.
His eyes glance up at the clock. You were cutting it so fucking close. It was literally 30 minutes before the time limit.
But honestly, Ghost doesn't think he can last.
Of course, he'd never tell you that though.
The door behind you opens, and Price pokes his head in.
"Oh- sorry, wasn't aware that..."
A pitiful grimace appears on his face as he sees the state of his lieutenant. "What's this?"
You press your lips together before explaining what you did.
"Crook you didn't-"
"Time was running out-!"
"So you put one of our best out of commission?" He laughs at you.
Simon is still fuming (literally) and is only turning redder than before. The spice is seriously hitting him.
"Well. There's your cure right there, Simon." Price nods to the cup.
Ghost looks at Price as if he was just asked to off himself.
"You think I'll slip that easy?"
"25 minutes. Think you can handle it?"
The three of you stand in place for what feels like minutes but an eternity to Ghost.
He sighs, lifting his mask and grabbing the cool beverage in front of him. With each gulp, he gasps for air in between.
"I don't know how this gets me to lose-" he gasps again, "-but I couldn't give less of a fuck right now."
You grimace in response, looking at Price.
"Am I forgiven?"
"Oh yes, especially since Simon here, technically lost first."
Ghost blinks in confusion. You do the same.
Somehow you just never noticed a tablet in the Captain's hand as he hands it to you.
On the screen it shows Ghost doing a check of each of the mail boxes, seemingly making a pile for certain groups. Soap walks in not long into the video footage, reading one of the packages tearing it open, and pulling out the very cookies that started this mess.
"Oh no."
You watch as Soap rips open the box, and hands one to Ghost, who seemingly asks something before shrugging and taking a bite out of the cookie. Your cookies.
"Oh nooo." You wince out. "Ghost noooo..."
"So, Simon." Price grins, that fatherly grin that has just about anyone feeling like they're in trouble. "When should we leave our paper work?"
AHHHHHHH poor Ghost. Couldn't resist any sweets towards the end.
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