#dan bacon

[apple-dandy]

I... I hate men. Don’t derail me on “not all men” either because look at this shit

Go fuck yourself Dan Bacon, I hope your wife someday finds out what a scumbag you are and dumps your ass. What a piece of fucking garbage.

[massivelyfurrymentality]

Systems Approach To Management

You know the moment, right?You see an attractive woman and want to meet her, but you have no idea how to approach women.Suddenly, you're paralyzed with fear and you quickly remind yourself that you don't know what to say to her anyway, so you pass up the opportunity like 99% of men do.It's Read more at http://ojac.org/systems-approach-to-management/

[hephs-thighs]

That article about “How to Talk to a Woman Who is Wearing Headphones” has been significantly edited, to include:

quotes at the top from women who say they support his article and gosh aren’t feminists awful

"Wave your hand in her direct line of vision so she can’t ignore it.” has been changed to “Wave your hand in her direct line of vision so she can see it.”

addressing the controversy of the article (in the middle of the new version that’s been edited to hide and erase some of the controversial aspects of the original) by saying, “A lot of the controversy around this article has been due to people imagining a sleazy, creepy or very assertive guy approaching a woman and harassing her.  That is their issue for imagining that scenario, not mine.  What I’m talking about here is two normal people talking to each other and having a friendly, easy-going conversation.”

also debating the controversy of the advice by insisting, “There’s nothing wrong with that” three times in short succession

[caleighfit]

Please don’t take Dan Bacon’s advice and leave me alone when I’m wearing headphones

I’ve never been antisocial. I’m certainly not considered an introvert. I’m also (generally) not rude. But we all have moments (or days or weeks) when we just want to keep to ourselves. 

Whenever I want to keep interactions short or eliminate the opportunity for conversation – whether it’s with my Uber driver, my barista or my coworker, I wear headphones. Full disclosure, I don’t even have music on my phone (I’m still an iPod enthusiast) – in these instances I put the headphones on specifically to be left alone. Generally speaking, people get it, and respect my wishes -- proving that this is universally understood to be the sign for,“Please leave me alone.”

Or, at least I thought it was universal. There seems to be one person in particular who didn’t get that memo. His name is Dan Bacon and he’s a self-proclaimed dating coach out of Australia who is making waves (and a ton of memes) for an article he posted on his website TheModernMan.com called, “How to talk to a woman wearing headphones.” Like most, when I saw the headline lighting up my Twitter feed, I thought, “This has to be a joke, a parody, a punchline.” Guess again. This guy is for real and this article is absurd.

This piece of journalistic brilliance gives single men, looking to find a woman, a literal step by step guide for navigating this situation. Have a read for yourself:

1. Stand in front of her (with 1 to 1.5 meters between you).

2. Have a confident, easy-going smile.

3. If she hasn’t already looked up at you, simply get her attention with a wave of your hand. Wave your hand in her direct line of vision so she can see it and say, “Hey, how’s it going?” She most likely won’t hear you say that, but it’s just a way of showing her that you’re trying to talk to her.

4. When she looks at you and gives you her attention, smile, point to her headphones and confidently ask, “Can you take off your headphones for a minute?” as you pretend to be taking headphones off your head, so she fully understands what you mean.

This is just one of many nuggets of genius advice that is woven through the article. Sarcasm aside, after reading it in its entirety I had a few puzzling questions. 1) Who are the poor souls who actually take this seriously? 2) Doesn’t the author have a mother, sister or friend who can educate him on the ABCs of respecting women. And 3) why hasn’t Bacon written a follow-up piece titled, “How to deal with getting multiple restraining orders”?

Countless rebuttals are circulating, informing Dan, and anyone else who might be confused on the issue, about how wrong not just the article is but the entire premise is in itself. The consensus among most women, and socially intelligent human beings in general is: How do you talk to a woman wearing headphones? YOU DON’T! If a woman is wearing headphones, she wants to be left alone. In my opinion, if you have to wave in front of a woman’s eye line to get her attention, the only thing you should be telling her is her shoelace is untied.

Bacon’s misguided and archaic perspective is that all women are just waiting around for a man to take initiative and strike up a conversation so she can fall hopelessly in love – or in bed – with him. In his words:

Of course, not all women are open to being approached because not all women are single and looking.

However, if a woman wearing headphones is single and hoping to meet a boyfriend (or even a new lover), she will usually be happy to take off her headphones to give you an opportunity to create a spark with her.

OK, so the only way a women is not open to being approached is if she is not single? WRONG! FYI: Just because a woman is single does not mean that she is a free-for-all pick up target. Just because a woman is single does not mean that she wants to interact with a creepy guy who lacks social awareness, acts like an entitled sexist pig and takes advice from a dating coach. End of story.

All this is not to say that there is never a time when a man and a woman can strike up a conversation and hit it off. In fact, it happens all the time and let’s be honest, it’s the dream to be able to meet in an organic, spontaneous kind of way. But, these interactions must take place in a mutual, respectful and natural manner. There have to be cues on both sides that indicate there’s interest in conversing. I can’t believe I even have to highlight these very basic rules of engagement. But, alas, here we are. #SMH

Dan Bacon –- if you’re reading -– remember, women have standards, minds of their own and are not waiting for your weirdo clients to come wave a hand in their face so they can be saved from the agony of being single. I’m not a dating expert nor am I a career expert, but in my humble opinion you either need to consult with a female friend on all relationship advice moving forward, or it might be time to look for a new career.

Let us know what you think by tweeting @YahooStyleCA.

[jameshesky]

How To Talk To A Woman Who Is Sleeping Alone In Her Own Bed

A lot of single women these days like to sleep alone in their own beds every night.  While it may seem kind of weird and difficult to understand, they believe that it is somehow better than finding a man who will protect them from harm and their own self-destructive behaviors.  

If you happen to notice a woman who sleeps alone in her own bed every night for more than two weeks straight, it’s important that you know that it doesn’t mean she isn’t interested.  It just means she doesn’t know how to show you that she’s interested.  So here are a few ways you can get her attention:

1. Learn her alarm security code.  It might be her birthday or the last four digits of her social security number.  If you’re lucky, it’s just a thumbprint that you can easily lift from her coffee cup at the cafe where you got a job as a barista just so you could see her every morning. 

2. Take off your shoes and sneak quietly into her room.  If startled, it is likely that she’ll go into what I call “Misplaced Mama Bear Mode” where she will become very protective of herself since she has no children.

3. Get down to her level.  The ski-mask is probably going to intimidate her a little bit, so if you can get down on her level she will know that you aren’t an intruder there to hurt her, you’re someone who is willing to meet her halfway.

4. Start whispering “Oh my God you’re so beautiful” over and over again until she begins to wake up.  If she is a deep sleeper you may have to get progressively louder. Think of it like one of those alarm clocks that plays the sounds of the ocean shore.  Transport her to another world where she is more open to your invitation.

(NOTE:  At this point I probably shouldn’t have to tell you that if she took an Ambien you may have to come back another night.  Check her medicine cabinet before entering her room to make sure she didn’t sabotage you.)

5. When she does start to wake up, comfort her by letting her know how long you’ve been watching her.  Has it been a week?  A month?  Since junior year of high school?  Help her understand you aren’t some stranger breaking into her house, you know her better than she knows herself (Read my other blog “How to get the info you need from her trash”)!

6. Ask her if she’s busy right now.  This is kind of a trick question since she obviously isn’t.  But she will appreciate being asked and be more open to you.

7. You will probably have to do all the talking.  She may just breath heavily and cry, but don’t worry, that’s just her way of confronting a situation that she didn’t know how badly she wanted it.   It’s kind of like when your dog sees you after you’ve been away for a while and just makes funny noises and jumps around.  

8.  Don’t try to get too far on the first night.  If you push it too far, you’ll only push her away.  She may or may not end up inviting you into bed with her.  If she does, great!  But if not, just let her know that you’ll keep coming back as many times as it takes for her to understand how much you love her, even if she moves away and changes her identity.

9.  Sneak back out before she has time to fully wake up.  The next morning she may wonder if it was all a dream or if it really happened.  Then the next time she sees you (NOTE: That should not be the next time YOU see HER.), you will literally be the man of her dreams.

I don’t want to mislead you and tell you that this will work 100 percent of the time.  It takes a lot of practice and you may have to move to a couple of different states during your quest.  But when it works, it can lead to a long-lasting summer fling (Read my blog “How to Dump Her At The End Of The Summer”) that will also be an open relationship because you can’t let her tie you down like that you’re a man who as urges and it’s unfair of her to ask you to go against your nature.

[hopscotchfriday]

Jessica Jones is sick of your PUA bullshit.  Courtesy of Cassandra James (Legends of Red Sonja).

[acadia]

From a Woman Wearing Headphones to All Guys: Just Don't

From a Woman Wearing Headphones to All Guys: Just Don’t

So this incredibly creepy guy who writes “advice” columns for men on “how to get women” which sound much more like “how to stalk women and prepare to murder them” is getting some s*** on Twitter, thank goodness. *How to Harass Women Who Don’t Want to Be Approached This is scary & dangerous. Male-entitlement + hypermasculinity pic.twitter.com/tsFRE40hku — Brandon Evers (@BrandonEvrs) August 29,…

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[cookiessangria]

How To Talk To A Man Who Is Talking To You When You Are Wearing Headphones

How To Talk To A Man Who Is Talking To You When You Are Wearing Headphones

Hey gals! How’s it going? Anyone commute on public transit today? Me too! When I’m on a bus or train I enjoy avoiding eye contact, reading books, looking out the window so I get out at the right location, and wearing decoy headphones so that men don’t talk to me.

It doesn’t work very well!

When men interrupt my reading and music, my favorite responses are terse and monosyllabic. However, I get…

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