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Jan 8, 2014

Danny Castellano is My Whole Damn World

Wait, no, that wasn't the name of the episode was it...?

Hmm. Well, it might as well have been because...look if I need to explain why then you clearly haven't watched it. So go watch it, flail about a bit, die from squealing too much, resurrect yourself, drink some water (you're probably dehydrated from all the drooling over Messina hng) and then read this. Ok? Alright then.

Also, most of this is either me swooning over Danny/Chris or flailing over Dandy sooooo....be warned!

Oh and about half way through I started calling everyone assholes so there's that too. I think I still have too many feels or something. I can't cope.

The cold open. The satin sheets. haha that was fucking hilarious! I mean I kinda want Cliff gone because Dandy but yeah I can accept him being the last one before Danny for now ;)

THE SHORT OPENING YESYESYES!

The coffee cake scene.

Now why does Mindy say 'Danny, this smells good'? Why not just 'this smells good'. Why Danny. WHY!?! It's like in 2x06 when she kept mentioning his name to Jason like it was the most natural thing in the world. Do you see what I'm getting at? Saying Danny's name is the most natural thing in the world for her. He's become such a huge part of her life, arguably one of the most important people in her life, and everything's just...him.

It's always 'Danny says this and that...' 'You know, Danny doesn't like this and that...' 'Danny is so this and that...' EVERYTHING IS ABOUT DANNY IN HER MIND. I can't.

The slap. Methinks Danny has some kind of fetish developing here.

But seriously. Think about what he's associating that slap with. Remember when she slapped him (TWICE!) in 2x08. Also known as that episode where Danny fucking Castellano realised he had feelings for a certain Mindy Lahiri. Yes? Yeah. Of course he smiles. It's a weird subconscious association with that night. Of that time they pretended they were a couple. Of what it would feel like if they were a couple. (Someone hold me.)

'Sex without nudity? That's the ultimate.' Oh Betsy. Sweet, sweet Betsy. <3

So there's the Tinder reference I had been waiting for! Alright, I don't really care about Tinder beyond that tbh. Timber, on the other hand, well...

'That's your guy right there.' Hm, Danny. Trying to sabotage Mindy's efforts to get fit by having Morgan as her personal trainer? (Surely he knows that won't end well?) Any reasons for that Danny boy? Does it have anything to do with the fact THAT YOU LOVE HER AS SHE IS AND DON"T WANT HER TO CHANGE?! (I'm calm.)

So the start of the B plot. Honestly, it was alright. BUT not enough for me to want to talk about it so....I'm just going to focus on the A plot.

Morgan being the softie-softie trainer. Then going to spitting on her face. Morgan and his extremes XD

DANNY IN A BEANIE! DANNY IN A BEANIE! DANNY IN A BEANIE!

You adorable sexy man. Yeah!

'Woah' Woah indeed Mindy.

LOOK AT HIS FACE WHEN SHE TOUCHES HIS BICEP! That adorable little smirk. Ugh kill me now.

'You have a great body.' YEAH HE DOES!

Alright, drooling over Messina's body aside, let's talk about character development/parallels/shit I always talk about in every analysis. Remember 1x05? 'Do you think I'm interested in your weird body?' Remember 2x05? 'You think my body's hot?' 'Ugh you know it is.' Now she's not even covering it up. It's straight up 'You have a great body'. I mean, sure, she's saying it more because she needs his help but that's never stopped her from wrapping up compliments in insults.

Look how far she's come. Look how far they've come. They're close enough for her to just come out and say that.

He still looks a little surprised at this though with the way his head snaps up

DANNY'S MESSY HAIR WHEN HE TAKES OFF THE BEANIE ASDFGHJKL

'Cliff is the first guy since Casey that I can see a real future with.' Ouch. That must have hurt. And you can see the flash of hurt in Danny's eyes. (Poor baby, let me hold you!)

'Guys don't care about this stuff as much as girls think they do' This. This frustrates me. Because we know that what he's saying is that he doesn't care about that as much as she does. And she's not seeing that. (NOT YET!)

'Ok, fine! Fine! I'll train you!' He just snaps. He's had enough of hearing about her trying to impress Cliff and is just 'fine, that's what (or who) you want. I'll help (support) you!' It's...almost like accepting defeat. Idk maybe I've watched it so many times I'm just picking out little things and blowing them out of proportion but there's still something about this that just...ugh.

'But from this day forward, I own you. I'm gonna make your life miserable. Awful.'

There was just...something...kinda hot about that whole thing. Ahem.

Is it me or is Danny finding a lot more excuses to touch her? He touched her arm when he said 'Are you ready or what?' (I know you can't keep your hands off her, Castellano, but still...don't stop)

Performance rhinestones. Heh. I had exactly the same reaction as Danny when I first watched it!

Fat Steps - I'm just mentioning these because they're one more thing that was a callback to previous episodes (2x04).

Danny doing push ups. I'm just going to rewatch that scene....a few times...for the purposes of this clearly very scientific analysis. (Why else?) I don't understand how Mindy can possibly get distracted by that but whatever. Pssh.

'Nice to meet you. Sorry I can't stay but I'll be back. Promise.' Danny, you're far too adorable. Stop it. I can't take it anymore.

'I got it.' Aaaand he touches her again. (I'm only half keeping count here but...)

I love how he knows exactly what Mindy focuses all her attention on. I mean, sure, they're friends and it's normal for close friends to know this stuff but it's still a testament to how far they've come since early S1. He knows what she likes but he's not really mocking it or judging her for it (like he might have done in the past). He's using it to help her. No sign of condescension or anything.

Also, Danny's storytelling abilities remind me of 1x02 (when Mindy says he's a great storyteller) and 1x21 (when that guy at the rehab centre asks if what Danny was saying was from a play). So it's still completely in character for Danny to be doing this.

So let's just quickly consider the names he mentions. Leo DiCaprio. It doesn't surprise me that she loves Leo. Pretty much everyone loves Leo. Fassy (gotta love the callback to 1x01 here). Anne Hathaway.

Anyway, why am I listing all these names? Well, it's not just the fact that Danny has remembered celebrities that Mindy talks about (we've always seen him remember a lot of things about her) but he correctly remembers their names. This is, for me, the big thing which clues us in to Danny's feelings. Well, we already know from 2x11 where he's at with his feelings but this? This isn't just attention to detail. This is very obvious attention to detail that he is no longer trying to hide from her. Maybe he's doing it subconsciously but somewhere in there it's as if he's saying 'Hey, I pay attention to you, I listen - I would be the perfect guy for you' and the reason he's no longer hiding it is because he wants her to see that. He wants her to see him, to see what's right in front of her, what's always been there.

'You suck! You suck, you maggot!' followed by the cut to him trying to stop her from crying. The whole thing was amusing but going a little deeper than that - CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT! Ok, it's unlikely Danny would continue being a dick to someone he clearly has very strong feelings for but still...he's being nice to her. He's speaking softly. He's trying to justify what he was doing without getting defensive or shouting at her.

The sit ups and the high-fiving. That was some adorable Dandy shit right there. And they were sitting so close together....fuuuuuu-get together already you sonsabitches! (I digress)

I can't help but find it a little heartbreaking when he mentions Cliff's name to motivate her. It just...sigh. This is what I meant by him almost admitting defeat earlier (even if he's still subconsciously trying to show her he's the man for her).

'You got this, kid' Stop it, Castellano! Stop being so nice and encouraging and sweet! It's doing weird things to me! So unless you're gonna be real - STAHP! (And by that I mean keep going...)

Danny mentioning the Golden Globes. Here come the 'look how much he knows Mindy' and 'look how much of a vivid imagination he's got' feels. Asshole.

Stockard Channing. Yeah again he knows how to rile her up (he always has) but it's done in such a sweet way it's just...they're like an old married couple already and I can't deal with those two assholes. Yeah, that's right, they're both assholes now. Everyone's an asshole.

Look how adorable that asshole looks when she throws her towel at him! Impossible. He's not human. He can't look at her with all the love in the world and not expect me to faint. Asshole.

THE STEAM ROOM! Well...um, where do I start? Where do I even...huh. Uh...naked. Danny naked. Dandy naked together. Words what.

Sorry about that. I got distracted again.

ANYWAY! This cracked me up so much! Even when I'm rewatching I'm still laughing at this scene.

What I like is that Danny instantly recognises that she's not comfortable with him seeing her naked and so he's quick to offer her his towel so she can cover up. That's more or less his first action. He doesn't stand there ogling her or making lewd comments. He attempts to allow her to cover up. Do you not even. Goddamn that asshole.

'That is so much worse!' Like hell it is, Dr Lahiri. You lie. Clearly the steam had got to you already and when you said 'worse' what you actually meant was 'better'. It's ok, it happens to everyone. I forgive you.

'Don't drop it on the floor' (callback to 2x08 when Danny did that adorable smile because he had been Twitter stalking her - he knows she likes dropping towels...maybe that's why there's no surprise in his tone? Hmm)

'It's my favourite towel!' Was that before or after Mindy touched it, Danny boy? Was that the towel she used when she stayed over, perchance? Give me answers, Castellano. It looks like a pretty standard towel to me. Why is it your favourite, huh, buddy?

Of course he wouldn't take his watch off before going into the steam room. Of course he would kick up a fuss about a $35 watch. Of course he would be worried about someone stealing it. Of course Mindy's hair would get stuck in his watch.

'Don't use me for leverage!' Are you finding unnecessary excuses to stand extra close to her, Danny boy?

(Side note - that must have been hilarious (and a little awkward) to shoot. If only I were there...for science. Nothing to do with a naked Messina or anything like that. Obviously.)

So his undercarriage (ahem, callback to 2x05) is the first thing Mindy sees when she's lying on the floor. Soooo is Danny her Michael Fassbender (beautiful face, giant penis) now? Is that why she's screaming? Yeah? (I'm gonna pretend it is anyway so you might as well agree with me on this)

'You should quit' haha yeah she would say this. But I think we need to look at this a little more. She's automatically assumed that Danny is horrified by what he saw and will look at her differently (read: negatively) because of it. She fears that he'll make fun of her even more and it's just easier for her not to see him. Even as Danny tries to comment, she won't let him because she fears what he'll say. She doesn't want to hear more negative comments about her body, something which she is clearly insecure about (despite all those times she covered it up with faux confidence). She actually says that it was 'traumatising' that he saw her naked. I mean, yeah, Mindy's known to be a bit overdramatic with her choice of words but I think this is at least a little bit close to how she feels about Danny seeing her naked. And the weight jab in 1x01 is essentially the underlying reason for this belief. Maybe deep down she knows he didn't mean it in the same way she didn't necessarily mean what she said with her jabs about his divorce. It's just picking at what they both knew was the other's deepest insecurity. That doesn't justify either of their comments but that's just what it was. I don't believe there was any true sense of malice behind their words because they're not bad people. They're good people who say bad things sometimes. And that's what makes them human. Still, it will obviously still affect her, even if it has been pushed to the back of her mind for the most part. (More on this later though.)

That bottomless beach comment though. Danny, what is happening to you, you saucy bastard? I mean, I like...;) but stahp I can't handle it!

'Your face? Pretty good. Torso? Awesome. Legs? Stunning. Feet? Disgusting.' I like how she couldn't even lie about what she thinks about him (whereas before she would have denied that his body was anything but weird *cough*DCIMG*cough*). Throwing in that feet comment was just 'hey, you're not perfect either!' It's a pre-emptive strike because while she may realise that Danny's not going to say 'hey, everything about you is disgusting' she does fear that he'll say 'there's one thing in particular that is disgusting' and, later, we find that her biggest insecurity is her stomach. That's the one thing. She doesn't want any comments on that. So she stops him from making those comments (even though he wasn't going to) and throws an insult his way. (Also, was this something that was slightly meta? 'Cause Messina likes feet so much? Eh.)

'I'm trying to help you' I don't think he meant training. I don't think he meant pointing out her insecurities. I think he wanted to say what he later said right then and there. He wanted to make her feel better, to reassure her about her body issues. But she's still not giving him any leeway.

And there it is. She's sucking in her stomach as she's looking in the mirror.

(Was that the g-string Peter used to wipe away Mindy's tears in 2x04 or....?)

'Screw you, Danny. I look great.' Here we have it again. She automatically assumed that Danny would react negatively to her body. He hasn't even said anything (good or bad) yet. All she has to go on was that jab he made in 1x01. And that's all she's going by. (Also, interesting that Danny's name pops up again...it's always Danny, Danny, Danny)

I LOVE that it's Danny who comes rushing to her side. Much like he did in 1x02 (when they barely even liked each other damnit), in 1x19 (when he's running towards her in the women's prison), in 2x01 (when he ran to the hospital). And all those other times he's been the first one there for her. I'm not going to list them all because, surprise surprise, it happens in pretty much every episode!

AND HE SEES HER NAKED FOR THE SECOND TIME. Cliff hasn't even seen her fully naked once. POINT TO CASTELLANO. Hold me.

So he's already seen her naked and he still covers his eyes. Again with the steam room scene, he tries to allow her to retain some modesty. He won't look because he knows that she doesn't want him to. He's not going to go ahead and look anyway. Do you even. That is respect. The amount of men who would've leered at her (possibly quite obviously)...Danny's not one of those men. Do you even. Danny. is. not. one. of. those. men. Ok. So we're clear on that, yes? WHY WON'T SHE SEE THAT HE'S NOT LIKE OTHER MEN, FFS!?! (I'm super calm.)

'I'm a gentleman.' Yes you fucking are. You're a gentleman as well as an asshole.

Gotta love that he comes back and smooshes his face against her door. It was just hilarious and adorable and...goddamnit I need to get a grip of myself. This man is a life ruiner. Both Danny and Chris. Assholes.

Aww, Danny! <3 He's looking at his feet because Mindy mentioned it and asdfghjkl. Stop making me feel things for you. Asshole.

'Woah, Mindy, is that you? I didn't recognise you with all your clothes on!' WHO IS THIS MAN?! How has Danny become even more sexy and adorable and everything?! I didn't think that was possible. Life ruiner.

(Also, YES at the 2x05 callback!)

And the cutie pie wrote his joke down. Daaaaaaaanny! Stop being so adorable! <3

When she's rambling on about how he has 0% body fat and only eats 3 meals a day...you can see his exasperation because here she is going on about her insecurities when he's been trying to tell her all this time that she has nothing to be insecure about and ugh. Asshole.

Yeah, so her body issues have been a long-standing issue (and I believe Danny knew this in 1x01 and that this is why he went for that jab - he knew it was her biggest insecurity and it was one long before she met him).

'What situation?' I'm not sure whether he has forgotten about what he said in 1x01 (again I don't believe he ever truly meant it - he just went for her Achilles' heel) and he really no longer sees that she has anything to be insecure about or he's just playing dumb, I can't tell. It seems genuine that he really doesn't see something wrong but the way she looks at him like she's about to blow up on him again and how that makes him back down makes me think he knows what she's talking about. I don't know. Not 100% here.

'I know that I could lose 15 pounds.' And there it is. The proof that his comment from 1x01 is still affecting her. Before she never would've admitted that his words got under her skin but now that they're friends, she'll be that much more vulnerable with him. I say this a lot, I know, but they really have come so far. And you can see that he's registered what she was referring to when he looks down, almost in shame.

'...all the girls that you date' This is very telling. In many ways, I think she's more concerned about Danny's opinion than the opinion of whomever she's dating (here, Cliff). It's as if she's saying 'hey I know I'm not your type' which leads me to believe that she has, however fleetingly, considered...something more with Danny. At some point. But the weight comment and the string of hot, skinny girls he dates led her to believe that he would never go for her. So she has always pushed the thought of anything happening with Danny aside. And this is why she acts so 'obliviously' around him sometimes. But let's think back to the one time she didn't. In 2x11, she knew something was going to happen and she essentially asked him to join her on the roof. And he declined. This is going to add to her 'Oh it's all in my head, he'll never see me that way'. This is the fear. She fears he's disgusted by her. She fears that his opinion matters more than it should (and what does this all mean). She fears that if she let herself think about it for more than one second, she could see something with him but he'll never want it and she'll be left humiliated. We know that's not the case. But her insecurities (commented on by Danny) stop her from truly seeing that.

So he's looking at her boobs again. He just can't help himself, can he? ;)

The Swastika on her back. Alright, that was played for laughs, whatever. But can we pick up on the fact that Danny didn't notice? She has all these little things she's worried about and is blowing out of proportion in her mind (everyone does it...) but he hadn't even noticed this little thing. He didn't see this imperfection. He didn't zero in on it. Because that's not what he sees when he looks at her. He doesn't see the little things. He sees the whole picture (both in terms of her appearance and personality here) and he likes what he sees. He loves what he sees. And he needs her to know that.

'I get it, you're self-conscious. I understand. But you have no reason to be.' Oh Danny, sweet, sweet Danny. You can see from the off that he's not trying to make her feel better out of pity but he's being absolutely sincere. He means it. He absolutely means it. And Mindy eventually believes it. This whole thing is Mark fucking Darcy. I can't. They're both far too perfect and I just can't handle this. Assholes.

'Don't suck in your stomach so much.' And this is just another thing to add to how well he knows her. He knows that's likely her biggest insecurity about her body (among other things) but his problem isn't with her stomach, it's with her attempting to hide it. She shouldn't cover herself up because she has no reason to and, here, yet again we're looking at both her appearance and her personality. He doesn't want her to change who she is just to impress some guy, whether that change is who she is as a person or what she looks like. There's the subconscious 'I'm the right man for you because I accept you as you are' stuff coming out again.

'And get a boob job' 'No. That's not what I was going to say' The amount of times he's stared at her boobs...he likey. We all know he likes 'em. And it's just like her to assume there's still something he doesn't like. She's thinking 'ok so the stomach might not be the problem with him but the boobs must be'. And notice how quick he is to refute what she's saying. He doesn't hesitate at all. He's not doing it to make her feel better, he's doing it because he means it and, although she's not quite believing it, she's seeing that. She's finally beginning to see it.

'And get rid of the cellulite on your legs' 'No.' Again, she's thinking 'not the stomach, not the boobs, must be the cellulite he has a problem with' She still believes there must be something he sees wrong with her because there's no way that Danny Castellano would think she's fine the way she looks - it goes against everything she has believed in for a long time now and it's hard to break out of that. So she's offering up her own 'imperfections' until he says 'yeah, that's the problem, that's what's disgusting about you and why I would never be attracted to you' but he never says that and it throws her.

'And have blue eyes' 'I don't want that' I swooned. Goddamn you Messina. I fucking swooned at that. Here's his subconscious thoughts breaking out again. I don't want that. Not 'guys don't care about that' or 'Cliff won't care about that'. No, he doesn't care about that. And he's making that abundantly clear. And her mind is reeling.

'Oh.' 'You're a woman and that's good, look like a woman.' Again with the swooning. It's the way Messina delivers this line and the sincerity in his tone and in his eyes. Damn him.

And then he realises all that he's said and tries to backtrack with the 'that's my opinion as your trainer' and, yeah, it breaks my heart a little. It's as if he's caught himself, reminded himself that she's with Cliff and his opinion doesn't matter to her (except that it clearly does). He just said all that he wanted to say to her but he feels like he has no right to say those things. And everything hurts.

'And also regarding *cluck cluck*' heh, this made me laugh. Danny, you're a gynaecologist. You can say the word 'vagina' without balking, can't you? (Then again...Mindy's Minute...)

Just love this so much. He's like 'hey, keep it natural because I like it that way' and if Cliff doesn't and prefers her to look like a '9 year old' then she should, oh, what was that? Did Danny say that she should 'get rid off him'? Oh yes, I think he did. And then Danny will have her (pun intended).

And he's back to worrying about his feet! (Maybe Mindy needed to say 'and you have lovely feet Danny' and he would've stopped worrying because I'm pretty sure her opinion matters to him as much as his does to her).

#The Mindy Project #2x12 #danny castellano is my personal trainer #dcimpt #dandy #danny castellano #mindy lahiri #danny x mindy #mindy x danny

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