16 weeks.
We are in Vegas this week for your brother's wedding, which is absolutely surreal. I was doing so good at being happy, and then your sweet brother smiled that Anderson smile and I just shattered.
It's like my heart just exploded with grief.. you didn't deserve to miss these moments, you were so damn young. I think that's what hurts more than anything, the life you were robbed of. 27 years young and it was all ripped away for no reason. Who the fuck dies of meningitis anymore?? You apparently do. God you would have loved this city babe, legal weed! You and I would have gotten deliriously fucked up together, laughing at how dumb I sounded. You had the most beautiful laugh. You would have been pissed at how much I lost on the slots, but always forgiven me because that's how we worked.
I feel like my soul is tainted by our love, and the life I feel we deserved. My vision is blurred by how much I miss you. Some days I don't even know how the fuck I make it through, I have often thought about how I could easily be with you again. But then I remembered the smile on Tom's face when Sara wanted down the aisle, when Patty laughed so hard at the shows, the lights of this city. I have to live this life for the both of us. I have to live so that nobody will ever forget you. ❤️
I fucking love you babe.
