Ethel pouted when the funny glasses man stopped her from eating. She was hungry, and the two lovebirds at the table were eating in front of her - and they were munching on sausages! She loved sausages.
The snow-man had his face in that one plant pot, making horrendous noises, his body was jerking. The silly glasses man walked towards him, and placed a hand on his back.
“Sounds like he's had a wild night out,” Ethel grinned.
“Ugh, I wish,” the party-goer groaned, “I was promised a party, instead I got.. whatever is going on.”
“You weren't promised anything,” silly glasses man said, “nobody was promised anything. There was barely any information on the invite.”
The snow-man stood straight, and wiped his mouth, actually looking like a snowman, “none of us should have come here. There's no way we're getting out before everyone dies.. we don't even know where the ‘system’ is, or if there even is one-”
“Good news!” the old lady called from down the hallway, “we found the system!”
“Oh,” the snow-man said, slightly more hopeful than before.
“I do love a system, I do,” Ethel said, “though, some systems are bad, like the edu-”
“Annndd,” the old lady interrupted Ethel, eyeing her meanly, rude, “the bad news is that we don't know how to access it.”
The old lady was being followed by the farmer and the old-timey-victorian guy, Ethel wondered if the old lady knew that.
“Where are Esmeralda and Amanda?” The farmer asked.
“Eating sausages,” Ethel rolled her eyes, “and I wasn't even invited! I think that's so rude.”
The old lady looked at Ethel funnily, before turning to silly glasses man, who, after a moment of squinting, said, “They're.. gone, Derek. The killer killed two of us at once.”
The farmer looked as if he didn't know what to do. He seemed upset - but Ethel couldn't think of any reason why he would be.
“You can see them, if you'd like, but it's not a pretty sight..”
The farmer shook his head, “no! Er, no thank you.”
The old-timey-victorian guy wrapped his arms around him, “I don't want anyone else to die. They've killed almost half of us. I don't-”
“We should talk,” the old lady said, “as a group, and we should figure out who the murderer is. They're obviously one of us.”
“Well, we already have one lead,” the snow-man said, looking a little bit more man than snowman, “that the killer is Batman.”
“Er, well-” the old lady said, before being interrupted.
“No, they're not, it turns out Bruce Wayne was Batman this entire time! And Robin was little Dickie! We were in the BATCAVE! And the system is the batcomputer and.. I'll calm down now, sorry,” the farmer said, suddenly more confident than he was mere moments ago. Ethel thought that he was better off confident. She could help him with his confidence, she thought, if only she had access to her trials here.
Hang on, why didn't she have access to her trials. She always had access, she could open a door anywhere..
“Okay, great. We have no leads whatsoever,” snow-man sighed.
“Sorry,” the farmer whispered.
The old lady sighed, “well. Let's debate, shall we? I, personally, think that...”
Who do YOU think is the murderer? and WHY?
Ethel
Margaery
Rumpled
Tracey
John
Derek
Helter
Voting ended onJul 18, 2025
*the two answers with the most votes will be used and debated with - answers may have effects on the story*
(theothervonkarmagirl) “I’d watch your moral panic all day. It’s so delightful. ”
“The point of the discussion was to confront Ethical egoism. There is no moral part to it when it comes to other people’s feelings- unless you feel like you’re morally obligated to conform to my second premise I presented.
“Which, I’ll repeat myself again: The policy of such is to look out for others out of self interest- sound familiar to you?”
"Right, I'm going to be controversial here and suggest Remus Lupin. I'm a massive Moony fan, but you've got to admit the guy's a bit of a douchedad. He's Harry's only remaining father figure from his parents' generation, but is too wrapped up in himself to help the grieving lad who is being pursued by, you know, the world's most evil wizard. Then he abandons his pregnant wife to go on a suicide adventure before getting called out on his irresponsibility and bad parenting by Harry himself - A SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD KID WITH WAY BIGGER SHIT ON HIS PLATE. Then he goes and gets himself killed in battle anyway, so his own kid grows up without parents, the same as Harry whose upbringing he was so guilt-ridden about in the first place.
Get your shit together, Remus."
Oooh controversy! I like it! Thanks for another great submission, shesnotwilfred. I think we should debate this one. What does everyone think about Lupin's parenting?
