#deep shit

[brittmarihaxoxo-blog]

[ami-gami]

I could have all of the friends I could ever dream of, yet I'll always yearn for validation from that one person

[otomes-and-tears]

*grip you by the shoulder* I need your analysis of the relationship between vesper and Keir-

Pretty please 💗

! CHAPTER TWO SPOILERS !

I think the most interesting aspect of Keir and Vesper's relationship is how, despite the circumstances that brought them together, Keir treats Vesper with a surprising level of respect and openness. It’s not something you’d expect in a dynamic like theirs, especially in a setting like the marketplace, where trusting someone—anyone—can be a massive liability.

Vesper is a big liability, after all. Even if they're being blackmailed, even if the reason Keir picks them is because they're disposable, but show promise, it's still a risky decision that doesn't only put his life at risk, but potentially the people in the mouse hole, which he deeply cares about! But the still puts some level of trust in them. Vesper's followed, sure, but he feeds and houses them. He indulges them in banter, lets them poke fun at him even if he complains about how annoying it all is, And most importantly, he answers their questions.

In a place where no one shows their real face, where people don’t even share their real names, information is currency. It’s survival. But he lets Vesper in, just a little. He tells them about himself, about life underground, and makes sure they know enough to stay safe. Even when he withholds things, like the origins of the Ichor, it’s a difficult choice made for a reason.

I think that has a lot to do with, not only his feelings for Vesper, but the community he's surrounded by and how much those values have shaped him. Both his pursuit of doing good or at the very least as good as he can to help as many people as possible and his inherent kindness. As much as Keir insists he isn't a good man, I think it's really fucking clear that he has a strong moral compass, and most of all, a strong will to keep vulnerable, outcasts safe. He goes above and beyond for that goal, and all his actions are informed by that desire to take care of his community.

Vesper is now a part of his community, for better or for worse, and therefore he extends to them the same level of care and respect he'd show to the others. I think one of the things that really struck me was how we get to see the people in the mouse hole, and most importantly, Keir's inner circle, warming up to Vesper! They include them in their day-to-day chores and welcome them relatively quickly. They're all keeping an eye out for the ichor they oh so desperately need, because in a lot of ways, Vesper is just like them. Another outcast, another person in desperate need of that support and community. I like to think that maybe Keir saw that in them too.

They might not fully realise the weight of it, seeing as how the marketplace's culture differs from the surface's, but Keir is painfully aware of all of this all along.

I think especially of the scene where Vesper opens up about their condition. It's a pivotal moment. In a place like the marketplace, that kind of information falling into the wrong hands could be downright catastrophic. But it's easy for them to open up about it, to show Keir that level of trust. This information exposes their fragility, their desperation. And most of all, they're exposing it to their blackmailer. It would be so easy for Keir to turn this show of trust against them, it's easy ammo. But he doesn't. He listens, he empathises.

I think that's the point where things really shift for them. It's a little moment but I think it's so important to shape how their subsequent relationship, and most of all, I think it's what makes his betrayal by keeping the truth about lunar ichor even more painful to Vesper.

[hauntedinkk]

I think as I’ve gotten older I’ve finally been able to come to terms with being alone. I think there is such a stigma around not having friends and not having the “normal” social life of a young woman in her twenties. People like to judge people of my age for not having a relationship, not having a friend group or a party animal life style but the truth is that people who judge you for them things are the ones who make it lonely. It makes you feel like you’re doing something wrong when in reality, if you let yourself enjoy life without those things, it can be really pleasant. I only have one friend who is also someone I sleep with from time to time. I understand that’s not the norm, but it works for me and I’m happy. I like spending my free time outside of work going on walks, sitting on my balcony with my cats, reading, writing, watching movies, travelling to different European cities, trying out different scented shower routines and dinner recipes. I enjoy going for drives to the middle of nowhere and blasting music. I like grabbing a coffee on the way to my therapy appointments and going to garden centres. Is that how most 24 year olds live their lives? No, probably not. But am I finally feeling happiness for the first time in my life after two failed attempts on my life as a child and an adult. Yes. Sometimes I think back to two years ago at 21 and when I was 13 trying to remove myself from this earth and it saddens me. Because there is so much more to this planet than others realise. I also just want to thank some of those on this app who lighten my mood when I see them in my inbox. I find it so crazy that you can meet so many people with such similar intrests with you even when they live 20 hours away, and yes, I’m talking about you Valen lol. You are such beautiful people, thank you all for making my life a little more interesting. I love making friends on this app. Sorry for getting deep, i am feeling reflective today!

[flowersfromunderground]

Quitting your worst habit will change your life faster than starting your best habit. Stop the leak before you fill the bucket.

[sysfreak-archive]

there are little things that our mom does for us sometimes that I dont think she necessarily realizes would be accommodating for our sensory issues and meltdowns and general autism shit but its still special to us regardless

when she makes hot pockets for both of us she specifically puts ours in the air fryer instead of the microwave because she picked up on us preferring the texture of an air fried pocket. when we have headphones on she taps us instead of trying to speak over our music. she gives us specific instructions when she wants us to do something when we seem confused about what she asked for. I dont even know if she does these things purposefully or if its just become second nature by now

its comforting knowing that our mom, who we went a large portion of our life not being able to be around despite desperately wanting to, has learned our behaviors, preferences, and ways of thinking before our grandparents did, who were quite literally the ones who raised us. thats our mama and she will always be our first source of comfort no matter how absent she was forced to be in our childhood. she had her personal fuck ups but shes always been a damn good parent in spite of them and its something we cherish about her

[mimosifoliamimer]

Drawing your favourite character with your problems is my new therapy.

✧°𖦹𓆣𖦹°✧

Esto de dibujar a tu persoanje favoroto con tus problemas es mi nueva terapia (*´；ェ；｀*)

[girimano]

if daemon technically cant really die are they gonna see everyone else around them die slowly. like. wood rots. computers get old and die. water & heating systems need to be replaced. holy shit…