strewn petals (WIP) | p. jackson
IN WHICH : when demeter's children fall into one-sided love, they begin to throw up flowers , starting with petals and progressing into entire bouquets , each different flower symbolizing the tale of their unreturned affections . reader forms a crush on percy , and reminisces on their interactions as she coughs up petals . . .
WORDS : 4350 (UNFINISHED WORK)
WARNINGS : mentions of blood , passing out , vomitting flowers , body horror basically , hanahaki disease , unrequited love , angst , no happy ending :) , i haven't read the books in a while , some mild expletives
A / N : first fic ! i kinda hated this and disappeared for almost a year and a half, sorry everyone idek what happened... anyways i'm not sure if i'll end up finishing it but if i do i'll make sure to post it <3 !
CREDITS : idea from @anakinniesluv -> this post , divider from a tumblr post , graphics made on canva , all other images belong to their respective owners
stupid , stupid , stupid was all that coursed through her mind , reverberating like the echoes of her coughs as her sanguine blood splattered on the thin bunk sheets .
amongst the droplets laid amaryllis (interactive link btw!) blossoms , white middles tainted crimson like their edges , the color spreading like the dry pain burning in her lungs and throat .
flowers used to be her comfort in the world, tending to them when she needed an outlet — softening their petals, strengthening their roots, accelerating their growth — she adored each and every one .
she admired the way they swayed gently in the breeze ; how they shimmered when the sun's rays hit them , illuminating their beauty ; the spectacular shades they came in : soft pinks and vivid clementines to mystic blues and hazy purples ; the delicate scents they fanned .
now , nothing but fearful realization remained , rotting her floral love .
percy jackson , the rambunctious, infectiously happy , comedic , understanding , infuriatingly likable son of poseidon had infested her mind with his smiles and her body full of flowering vines .
his choppy black hair , his glinting sea - green eyes , his laughter , the warmth of his palm on her shoulder the other night when he found her sitting at the steps of cabin 4 , dotting the grass below with white gardenias , willing them to glow softly in the moonlight , and when he tapped her shoulder she wished he would grace her lips with-
gods above , she was undeniably and wholly enamored with percy jackson .
and what did that love earn her ?
an unspoken rejection , a rebuttal of her feelings spewed up and out of her by the petals that began coughing out of her mouth the day after her heart dived into his sea .
every child of demeter knew what those petals meant .
unrequited love .
❀⋆.ೃ࿔ one month prior . . .
“ as we all know , plants , especially flowers , are responsive to how we feel ,” katie gardner , the cabin counselor , whispered as everybody was stretched in a circle on the mossy floor of the demeter cabin .
“ yeah , but what’s the big deal ? we all know we can control plants to some extent , we’re literally children of the agriculture goddess ! ” somebody butted in .
“ shush , just read here where it says ‘flower language’ “ katie had told them , picking up a dusty tome yellowed by age . " i found it in the archives a while back . " she explained .
“ see, it basically says ' if a child of demeter is to fall for someone , but they don’t feel the same way , the flowers will know . ’ ”
“ what does that even mean ? are the garden plants going to screech at us sonnets of how hopeless we are ? " another person questioned .
“ nope , it’s worse . just keep reading “
( imagine that this + any other book excerpts were written in ancient greek )
they had all mulled the new-found information in silence , expressions ranging from worry to doubt .
a few even looked at each other panickedly she found the excerpt highly intriguing , and wondered what " unreturned love " really meant – would the flowers be sparked into growth by a fleeting crush , or did you have to love someone truly ?
before she could ask , katie announced : " that's enough bedtime stories for tonight ! it's 10 : 00 pm and you guys need to start getting ready for bed . "
a collective groan could be heard , but everyone began to shuffle around , leaving just her and katie .
“ hey katie ? ” she asked , surprised she’d opened her mouth and words came out .
“ yeah ? ”
“ d ' you think i could maybe you know - borrow that book for a bit ? it was just so interesting and i wanted to see if there was anything more about it ” she continued awkwardly , not really sure why she was talking at all .
raising her eyebrow , katie replied - “ sure . . . i didn't strike you as the type to be curious about romance - related stuff though ”
“ w- what do you mean ? ” she squeaked back .
" i always thought you were just more of a quiet person, y'know ? but if you're having any crush troubles , just let me know ! " oh . katie thought she was asking for the book because she liked someone , she registered in her mind .
she felt the heat rising to her cheeks and tried to put on a straight face : " i am genuinely engrossed in the intimate disposition with which the author describes the experience of growing flowers inside oneself . i am seeking to discover the multitude of flowers that could manifest are , and their meanings . " she said , lightning fast .
" aww , are you flustered ? it's okay , you don't have to hide it with such flowery language ! "
she sighed heavily . " katie , i'm serious ! i only want it for research purposes ! "
" uh - huh , sure you do . don't worry , you can have it ! " katie told her teasingly .
relieved but embarrassed , she snatched the old book and sprinted out of the cabin .
later, as she laid in bed , katie’s words still stuck with her as she gazed at the moon bathed lake from the window . did she seem lost and lovesick to her ? it wasn’t like she liked anyone romantically , really ! why would katie assume that ? the only person she was with enough to be considered a potential love interest was percy –
oh . percy .
but it was only because they were close friends , right !
yeah , maybe her gaze lingered on his toned arms as he slashed down mannequins , maybe her breath hitched when he so much as glanced at her with his striking green eyes, maybe she crept out her bunk almost each night hoping to see him by the water’s shore ,
but they’re friends ! it’s fine and perfectly normal !
she was justified in finding him attractive because who didn’t ? hades , he even recounted to her weekly tales of campers throwing themselves at him for an ounce of his attention !
she felt breathless when she saw him because she was excited to talk to him ; what good friend would she be if she wasn’t happy to see him !
. . .especially at the piers in the starry blanket of night when their ankles would be dipped in the water , his fingers tinkering with the flowers she’d sprouted as they’d been chatting aimlessly . well , more like he would eagerly inform her on his day and she’d take in his every word , like water to roots .
argh , she needed to get her mind off of him now ! curse katie for causing her to think about him in such a way .
a pang of cold fear passed through her as she remembered what the book said .
she couldn’t let herself be overtaken by flowers . she needed to space herself from him.
but yet , she wondered “ what if he liked you back ? “
and thus , a seed of hope had been planted . the same seed that would germinate into the full-blown flower fest in her a month later .
*ੈ𑁍༘⋆ present
damn it , how did this all unravel in the first place ? she thought , recalling the book katie had shown them .
choked coughs left her body , and she knew she should probably leave before she woke someone up . but where else to go but the lake , where’d she had encountered percy in the first place . . .
rationally , she knew it’d definitely worsen the spread of her condition , but it had given her so much comfort in the months before , maybe it would now too in her crisis .
the cloying musk of the flowers was making her nauseous , and if she didn’t make a move now , a mountain of stained amaryllis would appear on her mother’s cabin floor .
yet in her fit , her mind fixated on those warm memories of percy once more . . .
❀⋆.ೃ࿔ beginning of summer + onward
did it all start when she was haunted by the tendrils of a nightmare of scratching thorns and faceless voices and she awoke in a cold sweat , wrists overgrown with itchy ivy , so she rushed to the docks to scrub the plants off ?
and did it grow when , as she dipped her arms in the cooling water , a timid voice asked her
“ hey , are you okay ? ”
and oh , did it sprout branches , when the voice stepped out of the shadows and took a seat next to her by the planks ?
in that moment , she cared less about knowing who the person with her was and more on soothing the ache spreading like fire on her forearms .
suddenly , the person placed a hand above her arm , and water enveloped the rash , sending a blanket of watery relief .
“ h- how did you do that ? “ she croaked , whipping her head around to meet the worried deep emerald eyes that could only belong to one person – percy jackson .
she had heard of him , sure , about the daunting quests he undertook and his feats of bravery , but she never attempted to strike conversation with him . besides , he and his friends were practically the camp’s heroes and he was always busy chatting with people or training or away on a mission .
he would never notice her , she had thought . she was just another of demeter’s daughters, seeking solace in the hummings of plants rather than the words of other demigods.
she had found herself curious about him , how he was always up and running , sheepish yet charming , clumsy yet probably the most powerful half-blood at camp . but that had always been a passing interest , sparked when she passed his mop of messy hair .
now he was right beside her , and had just magically washed the physical remnants of her bad dream away .
“ i . . . don’t really know , the water just . . . follows whatever i do . “ he mused.
“ oh . there must be plenty of perks to being a child of poseidon then . “ she responded softly , in awe of his ability.
“ the abilities are nice - if you ignore the horde of trouble that comes with it , i guess ” he shrugged , turning to face her .
“ i uh hope you don’t mind though , i couldn’t sleep so i came here and i saw that you were trying to rub something off and i uh- i just wanted to help . ” he explained nervously .
“ no , no , i - i didn’t mind at all , you helped me so much by doing that . . . sleep was giving me troubles too and that’s uh , how i ended up like that “ she stammered , heart hammering in her ribcage .
“ do you want to talk about it ? ” he asked gently .
she shook her head , touched by his consideration . “ thanks for asking , but - i don’t want to stay in the clutches of the past . ”
he nodded in acknowledgement .
after that , as neither knew what to say , afraid of crossing any boundaries . so they sat side by side , percy leaning back on his arms as she put her knees to her chest .
in reality , she was working up the courage to ask if he came here often . it’d be nice to have someone to talk to . most days , she did what was required of her , and nothing more . sure , people would talk to her out of nicety , but they were all passing acquaintances , somebody to partner with and say hi to .
before she could , he broke the silence “ so , on the topic of powers , how’s being a child of demeter ? ”
“ was it the poison ivy that gave it away ? ”
“ yikes ! poison ivy ? “
a light chuckle escaped her lips at his reaction .
“ well , it’s amazing if you discount the random plants that start growing on you . i don’t know , i guess it boils down to the fact that nature’s helpful and beautiful , and being able to take care of it gives me a larger sense in the world . ”
“ huh . i’ve never thought about it that way . it’s like being a nymph but you’re still connected to the modern world . ”
“ mhm , you could say the same for yourself , sea boy . one with the water and all , but now you’re all dry . ” she joked , at ease though this was their first real conversation .
“ together , we’d make a - well a whole nymph of something that grows in water , and a normal person ! ”
they laughed and she added “ a seaweed nymph , think about it ! ”
they chatted joyfully until orange tinted the bottom of the sky , and they walked together to their separate cabins .
“ so , i’m guessing i’ll see you soon ? ” he asked hopefully , leaning by her cabin door .
“ i’d like that a lot . until then , sea boy . ” she smiled , meaning each word .
“ hey ! i’ll find a nickname for you next time , i swear ! ”
a week later , when her ears were plagued by the nasally breathing of her half-siblings , she’d heard a tapping at the window next to her bunk . hoping that it was percy , she pushed up the blinds to find him beaming at her , mouthing the words “ wanna go with me ? ”
she nodded eagerly , and hauled the glass pane high enough until she could slide out . it was like she was going on a secret adventure , and she loved every second of it . percy took her hand in his and helped her climb out completely , and her heart beat just a little faster .
a breeze carried the scent of jasmine towards them as they tiptoed through the dewy grass to the lake .
there , percy had turned to her and said “ i finally thought of a name for you . tonight , i announce you as the ‘ daisy bunch ’ to my ‘ sea boy ’ ”
she considered the new nickname he’d coined for a second before giggling .
“ what’s so funny ? i could’ve called you flower girl , and that would’ve been worse , wouldn’t it ? “ he required , eyebrows raised .
“ percy . . . you do know that daisies close their petals after dark , right ? ”
he buried his head in his hands . “ dang it , i thought i did good ! “
“ ah , but you see , there’s more . ”
“ what ? are you gonna tell me they don’t like water next ! actually , don’t all plants need water ? “
“ well uh - they close up in wet weather too “
frowning , he motioned his hand toward the lake and sent a jet of water shooting at her .
“ perseus jackson ! what’d you do that for ? ” she shrieked , drenched .
“ see ! the nickname isn’t 100 % wrong ! ” he exclaimed proudly .
“ wait . . . how’d you know my full firs- ” was all he managed to get out before a wisteria vine wrapped around his leg , dragging him away from the water .
she stood above him and remarked “ hmm , who knows , maybe this vine told me . ”
he huffed . “ well , what’s the point of that ! ” he responded , pointing to the periwinkle layers of tiny wisteria flowers gripping his lower half .
“ because without the water , you’re just a boy , then ”
he quieted , and the mood became somber . “ sometimes , i wish that i - that all of us would’ve had normal lives . then we’d just be people , free to do whatever whenever , not bound to prophecies and gods . ”
“ then . . . do you want to talk about it ? ”
“ i shouldn’t dwell on something that won’t happen ”
“ sometimes , it’s better to let it out so it won’t come back later ”
“ i know , but i just , i feel selfish for thinking about it ” he confessed with glassy eyes .
“ you’re not selfish , percy , really . none of us asked for this , but right now we’re alive and safe and that’s what matters ”
“ besides , if we weren’t half - bloods , maybe we would’ve never met . ” she said weakly .
he tried to smile at her words , but it came out as more of a wince .
“ i guess you’re right , daisy bunches . ”
then , she unfurled the wisteria from him and helped him up , and they sat back on the planks . in an attempt to quell his sadness , she’d started spilling nostalgic memories from her times at camp .
“ once , during capture the flag , some kid charged towards me with his sword raised , but when i tried to trap him with grape vines , he tripped on a rock and my powers backfired . ”
his eyes became less sorrowful as he listened to her every word .
“ did mr . d get mad at the two of you ? ”
“ actually , he was the one to find us after the match was over . and then he had the wonderful idea to make me press grape juice for him as punishment ! ”
“ i bet it smelled nice , at least . but , what about the other person ? ”
“ he got let off with a pat on the head , because it was mr . d’s son , pollux ! ” she pouted , crossing her arms .
percy chuckled and replied “ well , looks like he got off of wine - fetching duty . you can get back at him next time though ! ”
the sparkle returned to his eyes and she asked “ so , got a plan , sea boy ? ”
“ in fact , i think i do ”
“ so first , you and me are gonna team up and then . . . ”
they had concocted the perfect revenge , under the eyes of the stars and amidst the rippling of water and rustling bushes .
pollux had ended up in a cocoon of grapevines , soaked head to toe by the collective efforts of her and percy the next time they had capture the flag .
over the past couple weeks , she’d become a part of percy’s little circle and started sitting at the barren poseidon table . who cared if that was against the rules , they’d been breaking curfew for far longer , and mr . d didn’t seem to mind .
after all , she and percy had been stocking his goblet full of grape juice for their little stunt at capture the flag ( non - fermented , of course , although he probably made pollux sneak yeast in there somewhere ) .
she found herself fond of his friends and warmed up to them quickly , like a flower leaning to the sun .
annabeth and her would bond over sculptures , talking happily about the level of detail or precision they had . annabeth taught her about what it took to keep architecture standing , framework , symmetry , and such , while she enlightened annabeth on plant types and uses .
she was reminded by annabeth’s confidence and dexterity of a tiger lily , bold yet wise .
grover and her were peas in a pod , they’d gossip about the latest happenings of dryads and satyrs , debate over the importance of a species in an ecosystem , and rant about the urbanization of the world .
conversation flowed naturally between them all , and she’d accompany them during camp activities , no longer stuck with waltzing in the shadows , waving awkward hi’s once or twice to people she didn’t really know .
but annabeth and grover didn’t know about the nighttime escapades she and percy had , and for that she was glad .
it was theirs , theirs to keep when others were asleep .
one night , when fate fulfilled her unconscious affections , he rested his cheek on his palm . admittedly , she’d found the way his face was squished adorable .
“ so , are you just gonna stare at me , daisy bunches ?
“ what , you want me to look at the darkness all around us , sea boy ? “ she hummed , too tired to care what she said
“ well maybe you’d put my arm out of its numb misery ? “ he smirked lazily .
perhaps it was the mischievous look in his eyes or the tilt of his head , but something in her compelled her to pat the space between her thighs , an invitation of sorts .
and he’d accepted , and she found herself with his comfortable weight on her lap .
“ thanks ! “ he smiled sweetly , unflustered .
maybe back then , she should’ve taken his lack of embarrassment or blush as a sign of how he felt , that she was just a friend , a person he felt carefree around .
but her mind was too crowded by his cheeky expression that melted into peace as his eyes fluttered shut as he said
“ you know , i’m really glad i met you . i can’t think of any other person i’d want to sneak out to talk to at night .
“ i’m thankful you found me too . who else would be there to call me ‘ daisy bunches ‘ ? “ she replied lightheartedly , though her tongue was leaden with unspoken words .
you saved me , i don’t have those night terrors anymore because of you . i feel happy when i’m with you , i’m not scared to say what i want , well , except for the fact that i think i like you and it’s terrifying . it feels natural to laugh and be witty with you . i don’t think i’ve been that open around anybody but you .
but she didn’t say any of that , and she remained with percy’s head on her lap in comfortable silence ( as comfortable as one can be when hopelessly pining ) until he pried her arm from her side and placed it gingerly on his head .
slowly , she carded her fingers through his raven locks and he sighed contently . in no time , he was snoring softly . she took the opportunity to admire his features underneath the stars , the curve of his nose , the steady rise and fall of his chest , and his peaceful expression .
he was prettier than the rising sun striking against the morning glories , the plush strawberries in the field , the proud pines surrounding the camp , she thought .
and selfishly , she wished he had a heart of nectar , because maybe then her plant powers would influence him too .
as the sun peeked its rays through the foliage , painting the sky anew in pale blue , she’d scooped him up in her embrace and tried her best to carry him back to cabin three .
while she walked , she prayed for his sake :
poseidon , i know i don’t deserve to ask this and i know i’m not one of yours , but i just don’t want to lose him . please , please let him be safe . let him know that there’s people there for him . i’m not worthy of him , i know , but i’m asking this for him .
safely at the poseidon cabin , she placed percy carefully into his messy bed . then , as if to leave a mark of her presence , she swooped down and placed a tentative peck to his forehead . immediately , she ran out , questioning her actions .
she hoped she could still get a few hours of sleep without thinking about his head on her lap .
silly girl . it was because of hope that something pushed against the back of her throat , and when she’d coughed it out it was – a golden daisy disc , framed by browning petals , flecked with blood .
and that was when hope shattered open and the seed bloomed to fruition .
she should have heeded the book more seriously .
she was selfish . selfish for thinking , hoping , believing that perseus jackson , savior of olympus , son of the restless sea , would like a lowly child of demeter , who he thought needed help with taking itchy leaves off her arms ,
who was clueless that the ring of baby blue and fairy pink hydrangeas that sprung beneath her feet when he approached were not simply because her turbulent powers ,
gods , he was an oblivious puppy , unaware that her head felt full of caterpillar grass when she was around him , that her quickened pulse and labored breathing were worsened by his presence because he was making her lungs bloom
he truly , truly only saw her as a friend , an acquaintance made from coincidence . he thought so platonically of her that he couldn’t even bring himself to notice the obvious indicators that she loved him !
she loved him when he laid his head on her lap . she loved him when he laughed at her remarks . she loved that she was the only one he’d sneak to the lake with . she was his “ daisy “ , damn it !
this had to be the worst possible way to be told “ hey ! i don’t like you romantically ” .
it would’ve even hurt less if this didn’t tell her that her feelings were unrequited , that she could grasp on to false hope , but no !
her fingers flew to the book , stashed underneath her pillow , and she hurriedly looked through the index until she found the entry for daisy -
( daisy color meanings credit here + daisy definition credit here )
she had to stop this somehow , or else everything would only intensify . it wasn’t like she could make him fall for her , evident by the daisy clutched in her hand .
when she saw the meaning of a white daisy , she laughed bitterly .
purity ? wow , she was so innocent and sweet she hacked up a dying daisy head because she was captivated by percy , who didn't like her back , who was only her friend , who never meant for her to take anything he did as beyond friendship !
the next day , she'd hastily scribbled a note in ancient greek adressed to him -
she snuck a look towards his table as he read the slip of paper , and saw his face wilt , shoulders slouched .
her heart dropped a bit , but she reminded herself this had to be done .
grover patted his back , and she caught annabeth say :
" hey , even if you think her absence has other reasons to it , give her the space she wants , okay ? you don't know what she could be going through , and if she needs distance to solve it , then let her be . "
and he had truly followed her request . she hadn't spoken a single syllable to him after that , and hid herself into the recesses of her cabinmates while he pretended she'd never been a part of his friend group .
*ੈ𑁍༘ back to present
the book had been an omen , almost . she’d read it , started thinking about percy , comforted herself by telling her such a horrible thing wouldn’t happen to her , and boom ! she’d been suffering for a week as a living flower trellis !
and now , she was throwing up amaryllis , clinging on to the book's story about the flower , how the maiden amaryllis and alteo got their happily ever after in the end .
but why did this hurt so much instead ? why did she have to be retching flowers forming from inside her lungs , fed by thoughts she couldn’t escape ?
why did she have to pay the price for the affection that he fueled , with his compassionate actions , his playful words , everything she felt was for him !
a bloody flower wouldn’t fulfill some requirement for his love , because it had flowed out of him freely , and now combined with her feelings , birthed the amalgamation her respiratory system was .
but his love for her was platonic .
heaving , hot tears welled from her eyes and she gasped , feeling the pointed ends of branches claw at her insides .
hyperventilating for air , she staggered out the cabin in fear one of her half-siblings would wake , blood dripping from her mouth , salt stinging her eyes .
she made her way through camp until the dirt path to the docks appeared , and she fell to her knees , feeling how the jagged leaves and stems cut at her lungs , how the petals ached in her throat , sour and metallic .
tears blurred her vision , and she tried to scream , but nothing came out . instead , a flare of pain shot up her chest , and she fell onto her side , crying harder and harder , tears pooling with her blood on the wooden dock .
please , please mother ! please put me out of this pain !
she clutched onto the planks , desperately scooting herself towards the water
at the lake’s edge she shakily tried to reach into her mouth to grab hold of a flower , but then she caught her reflection .
hair matted , eyes bloodshot and wide , mouth agape , secreting saliva because when she tried to breathe , her chest constricted and the invasive vines squeezed her lungs .
she was a monstrosity , a horror , one of those jealous maidens that disintegrated into below human forms in those childish fairytales so dear .
she was disgusting . unwanted . unlovable . decomposing from the inside because of her mother’s gift .
nothing would , could , wanted to save her now .
her mind clouded with pounding pain and her grip on the planks went slack .
if i don’t breathe , then all of this will go away . . .
TO BE CONTINUED