There probably won’t be any future me. What could I write to you? What do you write to someone who’ll never even get to read it?
Unless Yoh comes up with a miraculous plan... you won’t exist. I’m going to die at thirteen. It’ll be my fault, too. Even though I know lots of people would pin it on Marco, but... It’d be wrong. I made the conscious choice to believe him, and to follow him to the ends of the earth if need be.
Well, here we are at the ends of the earth, and the end of time. And I don’t see any path leading away from pain and death. Hao is - so unlike whatever Marco could say to describe and villify him. So much more. It’d be childish to imagine I can do anything to stop him, or even to influence him. Yoh has much better chances of swaying him than I could ever at destroying him.
I mean... I guess you could have followed Hao. ‘I’ could, I mean. Not that he seems interested. He probably isn’t. Maybe I could throw myself at his feet, beg for mercy, whatever to keep my life.... eh. From what I could gather - though I could be wrong - that would guarantee me a quick death. Plus, that would mean leaving Marco. He has no chances of ever being ‘accepted’ by Hao. He’s too... brash, and pure, and stupid. I mean that in a good way. I love him. If you’ve followed Hao... that means you’ve decided that love wasn’t worth your sacrifice. And I mean, that’s your - our - decision to make. I haven’t been able to make it yet. I love him so much. So what if he ends up killing me with his ideals? I’ve chosen that path. I’ve done this to myself.
There is no one to write this for.
I’ve written one ‘dear future me’ before! It was more hopeful than this one. I guess my current muse is in need of comforting *hint hint*
