† hAHA SHOOT ME ~ dexteraa
I WILL PROTECT YOU UNTIL MY HEART STOPS BEATING. he had said it to her on a cool september night while they held each other on her couch. carter had wiped her tears && they had stayed like that for a small forever. alissa had fallen asleep like that, in his arms. she woke up in her warm bed with carter on the floor && if he hadn’t looked so peaceful she would’ve asked him to come under the covers with her. ( she hadn’t. )
CHANCE had decided to cheat him of his promise in the form of alissa shaking in his arms. hearing him whisper no was ten times the pain in her side. she watched him with tearing eyes && a sort of sadness that only comes at the end. alissa would never have kids. alissa would never make them lunch or teach them piano. she would never get married. alissa would never write anything more than a first draft ( mentally, not on paper ) of her wedding vows. && she’d never do those with carter.
they would not go to dylan && shelia’s wedding. they would not give horrible speeches. ( maybe he would, but alissa’d be six feet under, rotting away. ) she sniffled, head in the crook of his neck, heartbeats so close to his they were almost in sync. && she cried like she used to, only now he cried with her, && she thought she had to say something. alissa was DYING, but that didn’t matter. she needed the last word.
she put her hand to his cheek && kisses the other, whispering I LOVE YOU. her time is getting shorter && shorter; if anything she would remind him this. alissa breathes it on his ear so light she might have already been a ghost. ❝ i’m glad with you. if i die i’m glad it’s with you holding me and ( … ) ❞ lost her breath. tried again. ❝ you’ll be fine without me, ❞ she smiled.
alissa felt it in her bones, trying to HOLD ON, her soul trying so very hard to escape. alissa swallowed her shakes, running && scattering through her like mice. ❝ take care of them. gary dylan shelia hayden aaron tell them i’m sorry, tell them i love them wherever i am. tell them i died with you && i died happy i’m happy carter i love you i love you i love you i ❞