Sorry TMI marriage post below the cut (but still rated teen)
Husband: I cleaned the whole house and put all the dishes away while you were on your walk.
Me: nice!
Husband two hours later: Let’s cook dinner together. Hands me a beer. Kisses me in a not entirely innocent way.
Me: Lovely, I’m in.
Husband two hours later: here is a lovely bottle of wine. I’ll clear the table and do the dishes.
Me: looks at him suspiciously as he pours me another glass of wine.
Him: I love you. Kisses me again.
Me: Sir, I do believe you are trying to seduce me.
Him: Yesssss. Wiggles eyebrows at me. I’ll help son brush his teeth.
Son comes skipping out of bathroom and husband limps..
Me: what’s wrong with Daddy?
Son: he brushed my teeth too hard so I slapped him in the balls and tried to make Daddy a mommy.
Me (sips wine): 👀! All that trouble for nothing!
