The complexity of a blessing
The floating thoughts in my head during the Diorapthe Young-literature awards.
-Everyone is so fancy here. Are “we” supposed to be here?
-I feel more than slightly underdressed.
-Once your name is written on a chair it means you’ve made it in this world.
-Why is this lady with exceptionally high heels looking at us with that weird smile? Oh there it is again the other lady is looking at us with the exact same expression? There is something insincere about their smiles. Reminds me of the time I would smile to myself in the mirror and complain to my mom that I have the ugliest smile. My mom would say ‘if you worry about how you look when you smile then you’re doing it wrong’ these ladies…they were doing it wrong. Their smiles were intimidating.
-Those envelopes with the results remind me of Schrödinger’s cat. I hope the cat in ‘Will Grayson Will Grayson’s envelope is alive. X-ray powers would be handy now. On the other hand, this not knowing has its charms.
-Seems like the cat was alive in the Indian box and now they’re celebrating it with this very loud Indian dance and music…oh cool I understand a bit of the Indian words, must be a bit parsi. I feel like since Slum dog Millionaire came out everything slightly related to Indian culture is on the win. It's getting so common it borders on sociological cliché. No but that’s highly judgmental of me I haven’t even read the book.
-It's so loud here. For some reason I can't stand talking crowds in a closed space. Makes me feel slightly dizzy and nauseous.
-“Everything happens for a reason.” I’m using this phrase a lot lately. Soon it will lose its real meaning and my weak mind will just associate it with failure. Losing…is it really a blessing in disguise or is it just an excuse for the unfair world? “Blessing in disguise”, I don’t love that phrase either. Why would a blessing disguise itself? What is this world, some masked ball? Oh talk about masks. We walked through whole Amsterdam centre and found the most awesome mask shop. Those masks were pretty high-end, as were their prices. The complexity of a blessing…Yes I like this one better.