I have been thinking about what you wrote in reply to an ask the other day, in connection to the Rey Solo theory, about why Leia didn’t tell Rey at the end of TFA that she was her mom and I think you’re absolutely right.
It would make so much sense for Leia not to do it because she was always focused on the bigger picture and setting herself aside, she would definitely want Rey to focus on finding Luke and getting him back. Plus it’s implied that Rey is supposed to bring him back quickly - not what seems to happen, but that was the plan - and Leia can tell her then.
After all, Leia is the woman who after being tortured and seeing her planet destroyed focused 100% on getting the Death Star plans to the Alliance (her own words to the general in charge: “we have no time for sorrows”), then on saving what remained of her people. And who the morning after learning that Darth Vader was her father was set to attack the shield generator on Endor.
And at the end of TFA there’s only her left after all.
Han might have suspected who Rey was, but it’s been 12 years at the least since he’s seen his daughter and he’s a man who’s still in a state of grieving. He’d likely tell himself that he’s imagining it all when Rey seems familiar to him.
The Kylo kidnaps her and he sees Leia again.
He might tell her his suspicions then and there, maybe not, either way Leia does recognize Rey when she gets to D’Qar. (This also goes a long way towards explaining why Leia ignores Chewie rather than JJ’s weak ass official explanation.)
But she doesn’t tell her because there are bigger things at stake and personal concerns must wait, that has always been the way for Leia.
And I just remembered something from the BTS video from The Last Jedi.
This is Leia and Rey (with her back towards us) and it’s clearly on Crait. Quite probably it’s the first time since TFA that the two of them sees each other.
Leia looks... not quite sad, more distressed and upset. It’s possible that Rey has learned the truth while she was with Luke - or maybe Kylo realized and told her - and now she’s angry with Leia for saying nothing.
Or maybe she’s suddenly confronted with Rey and has no idea how to explain to her.
Man I wish we could see Rey’s face here.