Dec 2, 2024
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adventurers be like
Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.
Welcome to my escapism era ⚔️🔮🍺
Cleric: Hey! Who's your god?
Warlock: What?
Cleric: I saw you call out to your god and then you made a miracle. Who's your god?
Warlock: I don't have a god. I'm not a cleric.
Cleric: But I just saw you!
Warlock: I'm a Warlock.
Cleric: Okay, but who's your god?
Warlock: I don't have a god. I have a patron. My patron gives me magic.
Cleric: So, a patron is a god...
Warlock: No, a patron is a demon, or—
Cleric: YOU WORSHIP DEMONS????
Warlock: OR a Fiend or a Celestial or a Great Old One or any kind of powerful being. My patron is an Archfey.
Cleric: And you worship this patron and it answers your prayers?
Warlock: I wouldn't say "worship." We have an arrangement.
Cleric: ...
Cleric: ...
Cleric: ...
Warlock: You look like you're having an epiphany.
Cleric: Well, ... what if my god—
Warlock: ...isn't even a god?
Cleric: YES!!! How did you know?
Warlock: It had occurred to me.
Cleric: Oh my god!
Warlock: I mean, the only difference between a god and a patron is the god has temples.
Cleric: My god doesn't even have temples!
Warlock: Maybe your "god" is just a genie or something pretending to be a god.
Cleric: This is a disaster!!! What am I going to do???
Warlock: I dunno. Ask your patron.
Druid: My god is a tree!