chaww. oils on linen, 2019
seen from United States
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seen from United States
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chaww. oils on linen, 2019
tldr; got bored and accidentally initiated an under-negotiated bdsm relationship with my coworker
Lando rolls his eyes again—it’s the third time since they sat down, not like Oscar’s been counting. An intern just suggested a mildly obnoxious PR move—something about McLaren’s socials needing a rebrand now that they’re “getting serious” about things. Oscar kind of finds it funny, this whole thing, because it’s always been serious, for him at least. But he bites his tongue.
“Reckon they’ll make us sing again?” Lando’s gone and pushed his chair closer, leaning into Oscar’s personal space.
“Probably.” Oscar says, ignoring the way Lando’s lip quirks up at the reply.
Lando’s smile is growing, like Oscar’s just said the funniest thing in the world. “Right, yeah, probably.”
The rest of the meeting blurs together, punctuated by the steady bounce of Lando’s leg next to his.
It’s been odd, watching things ramp up—given how horrific they were last year. His most direct comparison is Lando, who’s devolved into a bundle of kinetic energy that seems to pull at Oscar’s skin like static. Even when Zak dismisses them with a bad joke about being late for golf, Oscar stays put, like he’s tethered to his teammate. A teammate who, at some point over the course of the past hour, gave up on trying to hide his feelings.
Lando makes a quiet noise as everyone starts to stand, “It’s like they think we need instructions.” He huffs, crossing his arms over himself. “Like—like we need to be led around or something.”
Later, Oscar's going to think about it, how he almost missed it—how Lando’s voice trailed off at the end, like it does when he realizes mid-sentence that he’s gone and said something incriminating.
And later, when Oscar’s got his hand shoved down the front of his pants in a company bathroom stall, he’ll blame the noise, and the light, and the runny eggs he had for breakfast for why he says: “You like it though.”
An arm’s length away, Lando’s chewing the inside of his cheek, his face contorting in response. “Like what?”
Oscar wants to laugh, because it’s obvious, what the what is. It almost feels silly to answer. “Being—I dunno,” he moves to sit up, “told what to do.”
That gets a reaction.
Lando chokes, then opens and closes his mouth a few times, then blinks in a way that looks like it hurts. When he gets like this—so embarrassed that it’s like his body is glitching—Oscar’s learned to just sit and wait for it to play out. Still, it doesn’t get any easier.
“I don’t—what are you even—” Lando sputters, shaking his head. “I’m not—mate—you’re—”
“Christ,” Oscar mutters, heaving himself up to leave. “I’m not accusing you, alright. I just thought, y’know—” he stretches his arms over his head, watches as Lando’s eyes dart to where he can feel the cold of the aircon making his skin twinge, “thought you might like it if I did that.”
You're an asshole. I miss you more than anything.
MARTIN & SIMONE - DOGMOUTH
After remembering a series of violent assaults from a former teacher, teenager Martin McKenzie begins to spiral and indulge in the vices of
but your mother would be proud of you.
DOGMOUTH - WISEMAN, FRANK OCEAN
Everyone can see the scars, even if I tremble.
MARTIN MCKENZIE — DOGMOUTH
this post has been flagged for
messs. graphite and gouache watercolor
DOGMOUTH X FILM