#druid venting

[druidbottles]

they should invent a version of my brain that doesn't have anxiety

[druidbottles]

I think the worst thing about chronic depression is that it feels so stupid to be sad and then someone asks what's making you sad and you just have to admit that it's for no reason at all. "Yeah I've felt like I could melt into a puddle of sadness for the last week and it's literally just because my brain didn't pass the most recent vibe check and now I can barely get out of bed." Like that's so embarrassing. I could be sad for any reason and instead it's this.

[druidbottles]

Putting this under a read more. Pretty intense discussion of grief, mental health and suicidal ideation, and animal death.

My dog died today. It was so sudden. We thought he was fine. And then he wasn't. And they were telling us he should be put down and that he'd be in pain if we kept him alive.

I don't know how to live without my dog. I don't know if I even can. Can't I just die? I'd rather just not be alive than have to deal with pain this intense. He was my baby. The sweetest boy in the world. And now he's gone and I just want to end it all because I'm too afraid to live without him.

I'm tired.