#drunk!dain

[goblinxmutant-blog]

Gimli blinked drunkenly, then picked up his own axe and waved it heartily, coming very close to lobbing off a nearby dwarf’s beard. “Right y’are! I’ll go get mah- mah pretty elf prince, and no king is go- gonna stop me!”

[kingofiron]

The dwarf king already knocked out a few others on accident while swaying with hammer in hand. "GO! Follow yer dream and make 'im yer dream! Feel the dream, be the dream, touch the dream. TOUCH IT!" Dain slapped Gimli's back hard. "I got Randy...I mean Queen Thrandy covered! Go get 'im princeling!"

[kingofiron]

slurred words

Send “slurred words” to hear my muse describe yours whilst ridiculously drunk.

"Now, he’s off age, but still a young lad. Ya shtill into dem red heads, right? GOOD! Ya know ‘im when i sh shhhhents him. TRUST ME! Gloin’s shon is a beauty of a lad!"

[kingofiron]

SLURRED WORDS

Send “slurred words” to hear my muse describe yours whilst ridiculously drunk.

"I HEARD YOU LIKE RED HEADS!" Waggles eyebrows. "Not a bad choice, mah wife loves dis read hair of mine. SORRY! I’m a married dwarf, but Gloin’s got dis son—"

[kingofiron]

Slurred words

Send “slurred words” to hear my muse describe yours whilst ridiculously drunk.

"Listin ‘ere Que—KING! Yer so damn pretty as a pixie dancin’ round and whatnot dat ye got dah attention of dat King Boar. He’s never gonna make the first move…JUS’ ONE OF OUR MEETINS jus’ kiss ‘em. Ye hear me? I’ll step out if I have to, BUT YA NEED TA DO ET!

Half of Erebor and and all of Dale and and I KNOW SOME OF YER GUARDS ARE IN ON IT TOO! We got a pool goin’ and it’s a rather large pool. BUT NOTINS HAPPENING CAUSE NEITHER OF YE WILL MAKE THE FIRST MOVE! We’re gonna be dead ‘for anything happens.”

[kingofiron]

❋ (pffffft)

Our muses’ are drunk and making bad decisions leave a ❋ in my askbox for our muses’ to share a stupid, drunken kiss

"DERE YE GO!" Dain pats the mounted head on the wall as his the people around shake their head at the drunken king. "Dat’s all yer gettin’ for bein’ a sorry wart from my arse. ANOTHER ALE! Kissing dat frog lipped head tasted like lickin’ dah armpit of a weasle!"

[kingofiron]

“slurred words”

Send “slurred words” to hear my muse describe yours whilst ridiculously drunk.

"Fuck you! HEY I SAID BUGGER OFF! Ohhh ye be eyein’ me all night, HAVEN’T YA?! Well, I dun shwing like dat, I’m a married dwarf! ESPECIALLY NOT FOR A FLITH SNIFFIN’ PASTY TING OF BOAR CRAP! Ohhhhhhh, ye dun wanna back down ey? I’LL SHOP OFF YER HEAD AGAIN! I’LL DO IT!" Is arguing with the head of Azog mounted on the wall. (Book!Canon)

[kingofiron]

{if you're still doing these XD} “slurred words”

Send “slurred words” to hear my muse describe yours whilst ridiculously drunk.

"You…YOU! Ahhh, Boar, ye need ta listen to me. D-dat, HEY! LOOKIT ME! Dun walk away now, I can see ye movin’ now. Yer a good king, dis be true. BUT YA GOT TO WORSHIP YER CHILDREN! Especially yer eldest Boarling, sh sh she’s done more fer ya dan ye realize.

AND ANOTHER THING! Ye can’t jush stay dere, sittin’ ‘round playin’ wit yer royal jewels by yerself. NO! Ye shhhhhhould share yer royal jewels with Pretty Sprite Que-KING’S royal jewels. DO ET SO WE CAN ALL FINALLY STOP HOLDING OUR BREATH! Sides, deres a pot goin’ around ‘bout this whole matter AND SHOME OF US WOULD LIKE TO BE PAID OUT NOW!”

[kingofiron]

"Slurred words"

Send “slurred words” to hear my muse describe yours whilst ridiculously drunk.

"Wha? Wha? LADDIE! Yer a better king dan yer da was. SURE HE DID HIS THINGS AND HE DID DAT ELF SPRITE KING, buuuuut lemme tell ya, the son always surpassesh the father. Ya did well mah boy.

Ye could usesh some more booooars. Yes, definitely more boars. BUT FIRST! We must must muuuust speak ‘bout our brigade of pugs.”