#encouragingmyself

[text-exe]

Life is easy, and the way to change it as well. You just have to want it.

[isthisyourcustomdomain]

[love-return]

I learn how to continue my life by listen to Linkin Park and Eminem's music

Love Return

[parismxvnz-blog]

if you want to live a happy life tie it to goals not people and things

[yellowsugarwords]

i really struggle with organizing my room rn... because of the feeling of not getting close to my expectations at all (so i usually ditch ideas) and feeling undeserving of the good i have just white walls (but i still feel like ‘are they still flawlessly white??’), a bed and some clothes. i know i deprive myself from buying stuff, making art out of fear of a failure/imperfect and a safe place since my home is emotionally abusive. can i ask you for an advice in creating a positive, healing space?

Oh no :( first of all, I’m really honoured that you’ve come to me with this question. Thank you for trusting me with answering this ❤️ I’ll answer in detail below the cut!

For a long time, I felt the exact same way. I was so afraid to even try making art because I knew it wasn’t going to be good and I was going to feel bad about myself. That can drip into every aspect of your life; being afraid to submit assignments, to rearrange your room, to start working on a bigger project, or, as you said, even something like cleaning your room. It’s not easy to get out of that headspace, but it’s totally possible :)

I think the first piece of advice I should give is suggesting that you understand where your fear stems from, and that’s hard. For a long time, and still to this day, I’ve had lots of emotionally manipulative and abusive people in my life who used shame and embarrassment as a punishment. In that sense, I can recognize that my fear of failure (ie: not reaching expectations) stems from my past of being actively and publicly mocked because of it. While acknowledging it won’t fix the problem, it does help it feel more manageable. You can look at one concrete thing to tackle.

Next: accept that it’s okay to suck. This is another hard one that takes practice. Lots of practice. In this past year in specific, I’ve been trying really had to put my foot down and expect better of the people close to me. Because of that, I try to find ways to not let manipulative people have power over me. One of the ways I do that is when they’re trying to embarrass or make a fool out of me by laughing/mocking me, I give myself permission to laugh at myself. I acknowledge that me laughing at myself isn’t giving them power of me; it’s me accepting that I’m not a perfect being, that I’m trying, and that I can have fun with myself even when I’m not perfect. I can find joy in making mistakes rather than beating myself up over them. I’m taking the shame they are attempting to use to belittle me, am embracing it, and am using it to make myself stronger rather than allowing them to use it as a weapon against me.

Fun tidbit: manipulative people hate this. It’s fun to drive them crazy with it :)

And next: trying. This takes time, patience, and practice. Let’s say that your goal is wanting to learn how to draw. If you allow yourself to be bad, that’s step one. Step two is finding ways to encourage yourself to keep trying despite being bad. Treat yourself as you’re working on it! Take yourself to your favourite coffee shop, buy yourself your favourite drink, and sit down with your favourite pencil to sketch. Make a cup of your favourite tea, bundle into a blanket, and work at your desk. If the task is something like cleaning your room, pop on a YouTube playlist of your favourite songs/creators and get yourself something to snack on while you work. Make the act of creating/working fun and enjoyable so that even if you suck, the act itself was a nice experience. It can help encourage you to try again if you remember the act of trying fondly :)

I hope this was able to help a bit!! It’s hard, but the biggest step is accepting yourself for who you are, as you are. You are imperfect, but that’s what makes you fun and lovely. It’s okay for you to make mistakes and to be bad at things, and it’s okay for you to treat yourself while you work so hard to get better. Your determination deserves reward and praise.

Good luck :) my ask box and inbox are always open if I can help anymore!! ❤️

[moonlightblondelife]

[ahaydenhale]

Today

Why is today any different

Why should you treat it unlike the past

What is so wrong

That you have to put up your key

And lock yourself in a trap

Why is today any different

What makes it unlike the rest

You've had your worst possible days

You've had your worst possible emotions

You've felt like you couldn't breathe

Like your emotions were flooding you

Why is today any different

Maybe you moved on

Maybe you didn't

Maybe times just got too hard to control

Why is today any different

Why can't you continue on

When you were six your favorite pet died

You couldn't imagine worse

Why did you move on then

Why did you push on forward

Why is today any different

When you were twelvevyou started puberty

And all the kids were mocking you

It was the worst possible day you could imagine

Why is today any different

Why could you go on day by day

Why were you able to keep on going then

Why is today any different

When you were 16 gave your heart away

But it was broke it in half

You were left with the consequences

You didn't know how to fix it

It felt like you were ruined

There was no way out

There was no solution

So why is today any different

Why could you go one then

Why can't you now

Why is today any different

Yesterday was the worst possible scenario

Today is the scariest possible solution

Tomorrow is the best possible gift

So what about tomorrow

Why today

And why not yesterday

Why is it any different

when you were 25 you lost your job

You lost your house

You lost your car

Your family is falling apart

You push on

You persevere

But why is it worth it

What makes that moment not as bad

Why is this the cherry on top

The crack in the skull

The break in the dam

Why is today any different

[shed-n-shine]