Enderwalking And Self-Deception: A Look At Things That Don’t Add Up
Enderwalking has been a fascination of Ranboo enjoyers for a very long time, largely because, on its surface, it appears to contradict everything we know about Ranboo so far. How can Ranboo side with Dream, while claiming to choose people and not sides? How can Ranboo help Dream or be his friend, and at the same time claim to hate Dream especially due to what he’s done to Ranboo’s own best friends? How does this tie into his memory loss? The answer is actually all the same: A phenomenon known as self-deception.
Self-deception is defined as “the act or an instance of deceiving oneself, or the state of being deceived by oneself; especially concerning one's true nature, feelings, etc.”1 There are multiple ways in which self-deception occurs, which do come into play in regards to Ranboo, but firstly, let’s take a look at what we know about the concept of enderwalking. In his 5/22/21 "Creating The Lab” stream2, Ranboo reveals to his particles (we the viewers) that he’s discovered the truth about enderwalking: What was thought to be enderwalking is the state in which Ranboo does remember everything; the Ranboo we are accustomed to and know would actually be more accurately described as the enderwalking state. (For the sake of ease of understanding, however, "Enderwalking Ranboo" will refer to Ranboo with all his memories.)
This means that the Ranboo we know and are accustomed to is not entirely aware of his actions or why he has done something-- on the surface at least. Because what we also know for a fact is that Ranboo still has some understanding of what he has done while enderwalking, as evidenced by his hallucinations and nightmares; Ranboo says "You're trying to make me think I did those things again" and Ranboo's subconscious, taking on the face and voice of Dream, replies "but you did do those things."3 This is where self-deception comes into play, and one of the best examples of the type of self-deception that Ranboo engages in.
The wording of Ranboo's denial is the key giveaway in this situation: He is vague about what "those things" are, because he does not need to specify; he doesn't need to specify because, in the back of his mind, he already knows the truth. Arguably, true memory loss doesn't come into play at all, so much as that when a memory surfaces that Ranboo is uncomfortable with or clashes with what he wishes to believe about himself, he engages in self-deception in order to push it back down and convince himself it did not happen. "Self-deceivers must (1) hold contradictory beliefs and (2) intentionally get themselves to hold a belief they know or believe truly to be false"4, and this winds up being exactly what Ranboo is doing: Ranboo has not truly forgotten, nor has he committed an act unwillingly-- he has simply effectively employed self-deception.
Ranboo's belief that Dream's plan is true and moral is conflicted by his desire to prioritize the wellbeing of his husband and his husband's best friend. In order to not be in a constant state of overthinking about what his conflicting desires mean for his relationships, Ranboo instead lies to himself about himself and what he has done. "[...] If one has convinced oneself that [a falsehood] is indeed true, it is less complicated for one to behave or think as [if] that thing was untrue; the mind not thinking constantly of the true thing and then the false thing, but simply being convinced that the false thing is true."4 It is easier for Ranboo-- and potentially his loved ones as well, as evidenced by Tubbo's denial of Ranboo's involvement in the TNT that trapped Tommy in the prison5-- to pretend that certain actions of his or accusations of such are untrue, in that it creates less conflict both internally and externally for all involved parties.
Enderwalking Ranboo is then, by definition, the most honest version of Ranboo there is, being unfettered by contradictory morals and unhindered by the need to appeal to others. Indeed, Ranboo is one of the best examples of an unreliable narrator because he is unreliable to not only his audience, but himself as well. This has more or less worked out for Ranboo's relations to others on the server so far, because if "one deceives oneself to trust something that is not true as to better convince others of that truth[,] when a person convinces himself of this untrue thing, they better mask the signs of deception."4 Put simply, people are more likely to believe you if you are telling what you believe to be the truth-- and if you have convinced yourself that a lie is the truth, you are then in turn able to more easily convince others of the lie.
The morality of self-deception has been long-debated-- and considering Ranboo's own actions and enderwalking has also been long-debated for the amount of time he's been a character-- the truth of his intentions is buried somewhere very deep. Discussion about the reasons he would lie, exactly how much of it is intentional and how much of it is unintentional, however, are all quite exciting to behold! There is no doubt that there are layers upon layers to Ranboo, even moreso with his enderwalking, and especially with the knowledge of self-deception and that he participates in it. So how intentional is all of this? Is this something that he can be held accountable for, or is he a genuine victim of gaslighting on his own behalf? Are there others involved in his situation that may hold more or less responsibility or blame? These are less concrete as answers and dependent on your own viewpoints and the characters you choose to believe-- however, hopefully this has given you some enlightenment towards some of his more "hypocritical" or otherwise confusing actions!
5 and 3 for the prompt game? 👉👈With either allium duo or bedrock bros?
I know this is super old, but I wanted to share what I had written. You inspired me to write both, but I haven't finished either of them 😔 I'm determined to finish the Bedrock Bros one (which will have comfort noms) but here's the wip I had of the Allium Duo fic!
Reminder! Requests are CLOSED at this moment! We're trying to focus on Hermitcraft/3rd Life and OC stuff at the moment. 💙 Thank you!
3. “CAREFUL!”
Now, Tommy’s been out of the prison for quite some time now. He’d learned about Tubbo and Ranboo’s platonic marriage and their son Michael, but there were things he was still in the dark about. Something about Ranboo just didn’t sit right with him and he was going to make sure Tubbo wasn’t in any sort of danger. It especially concerned the tiny man that Ranboo was still all buddy-buddy with Technoblade even though Technoblade had murdered Tubbo once and destroyed L’Manburg twice! How could you just keep hanging out with a criminal like that?!
But that wasn’t all about Ranboo that rubbed Tommy the wrong way. The tall enderboy was just so spacey half the time, as if he wasn’t aware of his surroundings or his thoughts were a million miles away. Tommy could easily recognize the expression as the same one Tubbo got when he was planning something big, but it read as something very anxious on Ranboo’s face. There was something Ranboo was hiding from his family and Tommy was determined to find out what.
With his small size, it wasn’t hard for Tommy to follow Ranboo around. Despite how paranoid the enderboy was, even he found it hard to detect the tiny’s presence. In fact, the only one who ever caught Tommy sneaking around was Michael. Tommy shuddered as he remembered those cold, hard claws-for-hands wrapped around his torso as Michael examined him making curious piglin sounds.
He was lucky to have escaped before Tubbo or Ranboo came up to check on him. If either of them caught him, the jig would be up and Tubbo would likely be mad at him and he can’t have that. He’s just trying to protect him, after all! Tubbo can be so stubborn about things concerning Ranboo sometimes. It annoyed Tommy, truth be told.
As time passed, however, Tommy found himself growing accustomed to Ranboo’s routines and habits. Every morning, the enderhybrid would wake up, tell Tubbo good morning, and go upstairs to wake Michael and take care of him. He always woke first. Tubbo never was an early riser. Anyone who ever spent any time with him knew that, and both Ranboo and Tommy spent a lot of time with the goat hybrid.
After spending time with their adoptive son, Ranboo would then leave Snowchester and travel to Technoblade’s property where he kept all of his pets and his villagers. At least, that was the only reason Tommy could come up with as to why Ranboo stuck with Techno and Philza. In order to follow him, Tommy would hide in the satchel he carried with him when he left Tubbo’s house. It was easy enough.
It got tricky once they reached the little shed. Ranboo would put his bag down and take out enderpearls and teleport away from the property. Well it was rather hard to keep track of someone who wasn’t there, now wasn’t it? But that was okay. Tommy could learn more about the mysterious hybrid by looking through his things. It wasn’t like Ranboo could stop him.
And it wasn’t like Tommy found anything interesting anyways. Ranboo kept lots and lots of blocks in his chests. There were a few books but they were all blank for some reason. There were villagers and other pets in Ranboo’s basement but all that trip did was wear Tommy out. At least he didn’t get stuck anywhere. All in all, it was a rather boring job but Tommy was determined to find something on the enderhybrid that proved his suspicions right. There had to be. He’s not just being paranoid over nothing and this certainly wasn’t a product of jealousy.
A couple days went by, days turned to weeks, and soon Tommy found himself getting bored and less motivated to spy on his old friend. The worst he saw was when Philza accidentally led a creeper into his wall and blew it up. It had been close but Tommy emerged from it unscathed and hidden still so it was still a win. He had caught a glimpse of Techno and Ranboo talking in the yard, though, which was chilling.
This all changed, however, on one day when Ranboo was acting more suspicious than usual. The old paranoia resurfaced as Tommy climbed into his bag and Ranboo ran out into the cold. He was muttering to himself and he sounded panicked. Hearing Ranboo in such a state set Tommy on edge. Is he okay? Is he alright?
The tiny risked a look outside, head peeking out of the flap and up at the distraught person. Ranboo kept wiping at his eyes and hissing as if something was burning him. He… He was crying. Why was he crying? What was wrong?
Tommy almost revealed himself to comfort the poor lad, but then the hybrid spoke aloud startlingly clearly, as if he was talking to someone. A chill goes down Tommy’s spine. “No, no, I know. I’m supposed to be learning. I just want to control this, I don't want to hurt anyone, please.”
What on Ender was he talking about? Hurt anyone? Ranboo hurt people? Tommy looked forward to see where he was going and gasped. Did Ranboo know he was walking towards a river with no armor?! “RANBOO!! Ranboo look out! The water-!”
Ranboo gasped and looked down at the satchel just as he stepped into the swirling water, horror and terror written on his Enderman features. “Tommy?! No, you can’t- AUGH!”
Tommy held on onto the bag tightly as Ranboo suddenly teleported out of the water on the opposite side of the river. “Ranboo?! Are you okay?” There’s no answer. “Ranboo…?”
The ender hybrid shook his head slowly, blinking with purple eyes. He made a curious sound Tommy recognized as an Enderman sound and looked around the area slowly. His movements made no sense to the tiny. He seemed dazed, almost groggy, as if he’d just woken up from a deep sleep.
Tommy tried to catch his attention once more. “You- You good, big man?”
Ranboo looked down at the satchel slowly and unblinking. His eyes weren’t focused but he reached into the bag and carefully lifted Tommy out. His breath catches as he realizes Ranboo’s fingers had longer, sharper claws. He was grateful for the soft pads of the now paw-like hand that gripped him gently. The enderboy lifted him up to eye level and examined him curiously, no sign of recognition in his eyes. The sight sent a chill down Tommy’s spine.
“Ranboo?”
The hybrid took his focus off of the tiny and started walking, looking around more attentively, as if searching for something. Slowly, the grip on Tommy tightened. At first it was barely noticeable, but soon it became harder to breathe. Tommy had been going along with this strange development, terribly confused at what was going on. He was worried this was some new plot to kill Tommy once and for all again and he was battling an internal war with himself on whether Ranboo, his best friend’s husband, someone Tommy was slowly beginning to trust, was going to betray him or not. The grip was not helping keep his heart calm in the slightest.
Tommy grunted as the pressure started crushing his ribs. “Careful! That hurts!” He stopped walking but didn’t look at his passenger. “Ranboo?"
.
.
.
My idea was that Tiny Tommy accidentally gets caught by an Enderwalking Ranboo, and then I couldn't figure out where to go with it lol. If you want to pick this up and finish it, by all means go ahead. ^^ This is an open invitation to anyone who makes it this far and sees an end to it, btw! I think it'd be cool to see how you guys finish it.
hc: tubbo doesn’t usually overreact unless someone was keeping a secret from him specifically, in this case, ranboo didn’t tell him about his ender-walking state
Tubbo: Why didn’t you tell me!?
Ranboo talking back and gesturing their hands at Tubbo: Because of your tendency to overreact!
Tubbo, smashing a bottle of chemicals on the table in a fit of rage: I do NOT overreact!
I don't believe we follow each other, but I consistently see their posts on the dash. An excellent source of art reblogs I see hit the mutuals, and it's always good to see a ranboo-enjoyer with fascinating and based takes. Very happy to have her around.
[Send me a URL and I'll tell you what I think of the user]
so ranboos stream today was one of those in-character-but-nothings-really-planned-or-super-big streams, or as most people call em, a semi-lore stream.
He didn't seem to know the red banquet happened today, and this can't have just been him faking in front of sam as to not raise suspicion, because he was also clearly confused when the only person he was talking to was chat, which as far as we're aware, he has no reason to lie to.
so its safe to assume he was enderwalking when lurking in the background of the red banquet, with that purple hoodie and bandages over his eyes and apparent the canonical tear scars we've heard about before. but why?
enderboo has no reason to be there, much less hang back looking suspicious as hell in the background, only to later be seen walking 100% looking like normal along the prime path not that long after everyone's big escape.
so what im thinking might be the case is that ranboo was invited, but he was enderwalking when invited, and was enderwalking when he showed up. enderboo, who's personality is pretty much a total mystery other than being a good dealmaker and sometimes saying cryptic or sassy things in the chat in ender, likely wanted to investigate.
which is why he tried (and totally failed) at wearing something more stealthy. it would explain the dark hoodie and bandages over his eyes, if we assume similarly to normal enderman, ranboo's eyes canonically glow.
once everything was resolved he changes back to his normal clothes and just leaves, having seen two people killed and what was basically a game of uno involving only reverse cards.
You have no idea how much i enjoy your shared space au
Well I'm glad you do! Here’s some writing for it based on a certain stream of Ranboo’s. But he’s not the only one learning the lessons this time.
When Mumbo wakes up, he realizes that he’s holding an axe and looking down at a baby ziglin. No, not just any ziglin. It’s Michael. The past few days have been rough for him being stuck in someone else’s body at all. He tried once or twice to do redstone, but ended up covered with dust, and trying to wash it off almost burned because of Ranboo being at least part enderman. Usually, that was when Ranboo seemed to disappear, which Mumbo usually worried about. Especially right now.
Putting the axe away, Mumbo pulled out a golden apple and Michael’s attention was immediately grabbed by it. “Hello Michael. How are you this morning?”
Michael snorted in reply and Mumbo handed over the apple, the ziglin just happily holding it to stare at the glittering fruit. He then showed it off to his pet chicken and the two went around the room, making Mumbo smile before he tried to nudge Ranboo awake, if he was even there. ‘Hmm? What is it? I’m up.’
‘Ranboo.’ Mumbo carefully said. Thought? Whatever. ‘That meeting with Foolish about the mansion is today, is it not?’
Mumbo could feel a jolt of panic as Ranboo was suddenly much more awake and in control of their shared body. “Right! We- I need to talk with Foolish. Go over things before I get the payment all figured out. So I’m going to go over there. Uh, I’m going to see you later.” And Ranboo walked towards the trap door exit, bumping into the pet chicken for a moment before moving them closer to Michael and then opening the door. He fumbled as another chicken came up the ladder just as he attempted to go down, though he managed to close the door again. “Huh. Well I guess Michael has a new chicken now.”
‘Ranboo. The mansion and Foolish.’ Mumbo reminded, making Ranboo look towards the front door.
“Right! Here we go!” The enderman hybrid nodded before going outside, his eyes almost immediately seeing the giant build. Mumbo saw it too, and the large build made him homesick for a moment. It didn’t quite look like what the hermits tended to build. To him it just felt a bit lacking. He supposed that was because it wasn’t really lived in yet, but after always seeing Grian’s mansion, this one just didn’t seem as grand. On the other hand, Ranboo had no memory of anything this large and didn’t really know about the things the hermits did, so he was simply in awe at the giant build.
Finding Foolish was a slight chore due to the interior of the mansion being a bit of a maze in Mumbo’s opinion. Ranboo’s too on a second thought, now wondering if maybe it was a bit too big. But before long they found the god and even had a bit of cake to start their meeting. After that they were walking through the empty rooms, Foolish giving suggestions on each one they entered.
Mumbo was half aware of the suggestions of a war room, map room, reading room. But his mind was just thinking of redstone contraptions to fill the place with. A large room could be good for a sorting system. A super smelter would be nice to have. A melon and pumpkin farm in one room with a trading hall nearby.
Mumbo was pulled out of his thoughts briefly by the mention of a chandelier and immediately he rolled his eyes remembering Grian’s diamond one in his own mansion. It didn’t seem like that would be the best to have around here, but they could try something similarly fancy. And then they were talking about a secret room.
There was plenty of fumbling to actually find the secret room, Mumbo trying his best to help just getting them more lost, but eventually they arrived at the walled off room. Mumbo let his mind wander, trying to think up a redstone door to fit the wall and space. He was half aware of Ranboo fumbling over some words and memories, trying to talk to Foolish, but he wasn’t sure it was his place to get involved. At least until he was dragged in.
‘Mumbo. What’s the green card deal?’
“The what?”
‘Wait, green cardboard box one.’
Confused, Mumbo stopped thinking about redstone and listened to the god in front of them who was now whispering. “Cuz you know, We’re only supposed to talk about it at a certain location.”
Mumbo got another question from Ranboo, but he didn’t have an answer. “I don’t know what he’s talking about. I’m sorry.”
Ranboo started to make excuses and try to play along, pretending he knew what was going on as both he and Mumbo tried to wrack their brains on what was being talked about. They followed Foolish down to the entrance, listening to him talk, but then Mumbo felt Ranboo start fading. He went to mentally shake the hybrid awake, scold him for getting bored so quickly, but then he gasped in shock as he suddenly felt like he had a splitting headache.
He wasn’t really paying attention as Ranboo took them elsewhere, he and Foolish soon in Michael’s room. They talked for a bit before Ranboo asked for Mumbo to make up some sort of excuse. The redstoner fumbled with one, but the god seemed to accept it without too much hesitation, and then they were out of the room.
“Ranboo, what was that?”
The hybrid didn’t immediately answer, just walking until they were out of hearing range. Then he stopped in the middle of the hall. “I remembered something.”
Mumbo was worried for a second that Ranboo was heard, but was glad to see that wasn’t the case. “What do you mean? Is it about whatever Foolish was talking about?”
“No. It was.” Ranboo gave a frustrated sigh. “That thing. What was it supposed to be?”
“Ranboo, what’s going on?”
“What was that supposed to be? C’mon. Think, think, think, think, think. Lesson fourteen. Oppor- What deal did I make with Foolish?”
“I don’t know. Ranboo, are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m just- It’s- I’m just a little light headed right now. That’s all it is. Nothing to do with all those experiments I’ve been doing.”
“The what?! Ranboo?! What do you mean experiments?!”
“Well, I haven’t been doing them that much with you around. But it doesn’t matter. There would be no side effects to them. Absolutely none.”
Ranboo continued to walk, reaching a yellow building decorated with alliums. He tried changing the subject, talking about how he needed to finish the build, and then the headache was back. Mumbo felt like he was scrambling to find something to hold onto and brace himself against whatever was going on. It wasn’t until Ranboo spoke up again that he realized things were clearing, but he was still too much of a mess to comprehend what was being said.
“Ranboo. I think you should go home. You obviously need it. I’m sure Foolish won’t be too upset if he sees you going home to get some rest.”
“No. No. It’s fine. It’s nothing. It’s um, it’s nothing! Can’t be anything because, uh, it has- No, no. It’s fine. It’s fine.” Mumbo went to say something else, but then Ranboo stopped in place and spoke again. “Lesson twenty-seven? How many lessons are there?”
“Ranboo?”
“No. He’s still in prison.”
“You mean Dream?”
But Ranboo just kept talking to himself, ignoring Mumbo. Eventually another bout of pain came, Mumbo struggling against it. When he came too again, Ranboo was saying he was fine, making Mumbo pipe up. “Ranboo. You’re not fine. For all we know this is some side effect of me being stuck in your mind.”
Ranboo stopped walking. “I think I need to tell people.”
“Yes, that sounds like a good-”
“I think I need to tell people what I’ve done.”
That caught Mumbo off guard. “What you’ve done? Ranboo what am I missing here? What did you do?”
“They wouldn’t hold it against me, right?”
“Ranboo, I need more context. For a simple answer, I believe it depends on who you tell, but I still don’t know what thing you’ve done.”
Ranboo just kept walking aimlessly. “No, I should tell people what I’ve done. Sure, they might be mad for a little bit, but at least then they’ll know. I can trust them I think.”
“Again, that depends on-” Mumbo started to reply before he was once again struck with pain. It didn’t last too long, and there was silence as he recovered. Ranboo hadn’t moved far, so hopefully he hadn’t missed much again.
“Unless… Unless I can’t.” Ranboo said, before giving a shuddering sigh. “What… What do these mean? And why are there fifty-three of them?”
“Ranboo. I need you to calm down. Explain what’s going on.”
“Does it mean that I’m not- That I know more than I already thought?” He paused for a moment before shaking his head, trying to sound positive. “No, no, no! I just have to- No, I just have to block it out. No I just have to, I just have to block- block them out. I just have to- No, I just have to block them out, because... it’s what I’ve been doing this entire time. I mean, the experiments have been doing well. I mean, I figured out- I figured out how to cause it! So why…?” He sighed again. “I… I thought that… I knew that there might be side effects, but I… didn’t think that… I didn’t think that this is what it would be.”
“Ranboo. We should go back to your home.”
“No, it’s fine.”
“It’s obviously not fine!”
“No, it’s fine. I’m doing-” He took a deep breath to calm himself. “Okay. It’s fine! It’s fine.”
Then Ranboo’s eyes locked on the prison in the distance. That worried Mumbo even more, so he spoke up a little. “Ranboo, you’re not planning to…?”
The hybrid shook his head. “No. No, no. I promised myself I wouldn’t let that happen. I promised myself I wouldn’t go in there.”
“Good, because I don’t think visiting him would be the best plan. Just because he’s the admin doesn’t mean he would know what’s going on or even try to help.”
“Okay. Okay. It’s fine. It’s fine. It’s fine. ‘Kay.” And then Ranboo stopped walking and slowly turned to face in the direction of the prison again.
“Ranboo. No. We are not going to the prison.”
Ranboo nodded. “Okay. Okay. Yeah.” he agreed. “No I don’t- I should just- I need to go home. I just need to go home.”
“Yes, that is a great idea. Go home, spend some time with Michael, call Tubbo if you need more support, alright?” Mumbo suggested, glad that Ranboo finally seemed to be calming down.
“If- If I- I should just get home. I should just get home.”
“Yes, exactly. Just head home.”
“Just g-” And Ranboo’s panicked spiked and Mumbo was in pain once more. This time he tried to fight against whatever it was, and while he wasn’t able to make much headway, he was able to catch one thing.
“Lesson sixty-seven? Ranboo what is that?”
“Leave no evidence of what you have helped with.” Ranboo answered in a somewhat dark tone. “Evidence of…. Evidence of what?”
“Ranboo we need you to go home now.” Mumbo said seriously. Something was definitely absolutely completely wrong now. “Stop thinking about it and just go home. If not, I’ll have to take control myself and force us there, do you understand?”
“What did I do?”
“Ranboo.” Mumbo said harshly, hoping to get the hybrid’s attention, but to no avail.
“No, no. It’s just- Oh! I’m hungry! That’s why! That’s all it is!” Ranboo said before eating a few baked potatoes.
“Ranboo. This is not just because you’re hungry.”
“It’s just because I haven’t eaten! It’s just because I was a little hungry.”
“I know that you don’t believe that.” Mumbo said. “You’re just trying to convince yourself that’s what’s going on but it’s not true. Ranboo, something is wrong and you need to go home. You need to go home right now, do you understand?”
“Or it could have something to do with the experiments you idiot!” Ranboo yelled, more at himself than Mumbo. He was quiet after that, Mumbo not speaking up to give him a moment. Then he spoke again in a sad tone. “I knew. I knew that if I experimented on it- If I tried to control it, then there might be side effects, but I don’t want these.”
“Ranboo…”
“It’s fine! It’s fine! I don’t even know what these are!” He cut Mumbo off with a chipper tone. “I don’t even know what these are, okay? It’s fine. I can just go home and- I can just go home and it’ll all be fine.” Even though he was trying to convince himself that, Mumbo could hear the hybrid’s worry. “God, it was going so well too. I was fine. I just wanted to figure out how to stop it from happening. And then I screwed it all up again.”
Mumbo tried to comfort Ranboo, noticing that the hybrid was on the verge of tears. He spoke in a calm voice, trying once more to convince Ranboo to just go home. But again, the hybrid tried to pretend everything was fine and go about his day. Any time Mumbo tried to say something, he was talked over by Ranboo trying to pretend everything was fine.
Then, Mumbo noticed as Ranboo seemed to stumble over his words and stop in place, the same he did when the pain was about to happen. He braced himself just in time for whatever was happening, resisting the waves of what was causing him pain, able to fully catch what was going on. A message seemed to be sent to him and Ranboo mentally. ‘Lesson 94: DO NOT LET THEM KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE.’
“Ranboo… Ranboo what was-”
“I have to go to the prison.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s… It’s my fault Tommy got stuck in there. I’m the reason he ended up dead. I mean, I don’t remember what happened, but it had to be me. I found the TNT, and there were explosions and-”
“Ranboo calm down! You’re just panicking yourself more.”
“It was the fourth book. It was the fourth book.”
“What was the fourth book? Ranboo I still have barely any context.”
“Please Mumbo, I need to go to the prison. It was the fourth book! God! I have to go to the prison! I have to- I have to go to the prison!”
“You need to go home!”
“No! I have to go to the prison! Now! I- I have to talk to Sam. Please I have to talk with him.”
Mumbo was reluctant, but agreed. “Alright. Fine. We can talk with him, and then you need to go home.”
Mumbo did his best to keep Ranboo as calm as possible as they went towards the prison. It didn’t do too much, but he managed to keep the hybrid from completely breaking down. When they were just about at the prison, Ranboo saw Sam and Mumbo could feel the hybrid relax just from seeing the man. Ranboo called out Sam’s name until he turned around, wondering what the hybrid needed.
“Oh, hey Ranboo.” Sam said, his calm voice very different from Ranboo’s breathless words.
“How- How are you doing?”
Sam paused, obviously picking up on Ranboo’s panic. “I’m… good. How are you?”
“Doin’ good.” Ranboo replied, and Mumbo was half tempted to forcefully take control right then and there so the hybrid wouldn’t dance around the truth.
“Well, I’m just cleaning up a bunch of holes around the prison. Trying to clean it up.”
“Oh yeah, that’s great. Uh, um… I need to go in the prison Sam.”
“You what?” Sam asked, shocked, while Mumbo said the same thing in a more exasperated tone. “No, Ranboo this is not what we agreed to. You were just going to talk with Sam and then we were going home.”
“I need to go in the prison Sam.” Ranboo repeated, more confident this time. “I need to go in.”
“You need to go in the prison?” Sam asked, sounding a bit skeptical. “N- Wait, what do you need to go in the prison f- You don’t need to go in the prison Ranboo. You can’t. We’re not- No one’s allowed to visit the prison Ranboo.”
Mumbo sighed, glad that Sam wasn’t going to let Ranboo in, but then the hybrid spoke up again. “I know that, but I need to go- I need to go in, Sam! You don’t understand, I need to go in! Please!”
“Ranboo… Are you okay?” Sam asked, sounding worried, and Mumbo mentally facepalmed as Ranboo said he was fine when it was still very clear he wasn’t.
“Yeah no, I’m fine. I uh, I just fell in some water on the way here. That’s all. I’m fine. I need you to let me in the prison though.”
“Are you sure you’re alright though?”
“Yeah, I’m completely okay. I just need you to let me into the prison. Please.”
“I’m not letting you in the prison.” Sam replied, trying to sound serious, but concern still coming through. “You told me yourself, you didn’t want to go into the prison.”
“I know.” Ranboo started, sounding frustrated. “But I’m also telling you now, to let me in!”
There was silence for a few moments and Mumbo was worried that Sam was about to say yes. But thankfully, he didn’t. “I’m not going to let you into the prison Ranboo. You know what happened the last time someone was let in the prison. No one can go in the prison.”
“Please Sam. Why not? Why not? Why not?!”
“You told me yourself to keep you away from the prison.”
“I know, but I-”
“-You thought it was dangerous. You said Dream was dangerous, that we need to keep everyone away. That’s what you said. You told me that.”
“Yeah, but I’m telling you now Sam.” Ranboo started, and finally Mumbo understood what was going on. Not wanting to keep dancing around, he pushed Ranboo out of control and spoke himself, trying to hide his accent and sound as flustered as Ranboo was. “I want to be put in the prison. As a prisoner. I don’t want to be a visitor, I want to be locked up.”
Sam was quiet, stunned by the statement. Mumbo carefully gave Ranboo control again, the hybrid mentally thanking him as they waited for Sam to respond. “W- What?”
“I need to be put in the prison.”
“No. No Ranboo. You don’t need to be put in the prison.” Sam’s serious tone switched out for a worried and concerned one. “What are you talking about?”
“No, I do.” Ranboo said, shaking his head as he disagreed with the warden. “I need to because-” And suddenly the words refused to come out. Ranboo was just as surprised as Mumbo was, trying again. “I need to because-” but his mouth shut itself. “Because you don’t know what Drmm…”
“Ranboo?”
“I…. I can’t tell you why.” Ranboo said instead. “I just need you to trust me. Please Sam, put me in the prison.”
“Ranboo, I’m not going to try and lock you in the prison. You don’t need to be in the prison. It’s dangerous. You said yourself that no one should be going in there.”
“No! I mean-! As a visitor! But I want to go in as an inmate!”
“Ranboo, I’m not going to lock an innocent person into the prison.”
“But I’m not-!” Ranboo said, once again on the verge of tears.”
“You haven’t done anything wrong Ranboo.” Sam said, the slightest bit of a different accent creeping its way into the words. “What’s going on with you? Do you need to talk?”
“It’s- I can’t tell you! I can’t tell anyone! I only managed to tell Mmm… To tell Mmph… I just can’t tell anyone!”
“O-okay.” Sam tried saying in a calm tone. “Okay I get that. Are you alright? Just tell me, are you alright?”
“I don’t know anymore Sam.” Ranboo said, and then Mumbo fet the slight burning that came from Ranboo’s tears. “But… please Sam, please! Please, I’m begging- Please just put me in the prison!”
Sam continued to refuse as Ranboo begged to be put in, trying to hand over his gear to the warden. He begged and shouted and yelled and pleaded, asking to be put in there, maybe just for a few years to keep people safe. But Sam still refused, saying if someone asked to be put in, they likely didn’t actually need to be put in prison.
“Ranboo. There’s nothing you could do that would make us- would make me put you in the prison. I will not let anyone else into this prison with Dream. Because of what he does.”
“Please, you need to put me in there. There is a reason.”
“No there’s not.”
“No there is! There’s so many of them! There’s… there’s ninety-three of them Sam! There could even be hundreds of reasons. Thousands...”
Sam put his hands on Ranboo’s shoulders, one hand gripping a bit tighter than the other in such a familiar way to Mumbo. “I look at you, and I can’t see any reasons why you would need to be locked up in a place like that, alright? No one like you needs to be in this prison. You are not being put in there.”
The two of them stared at each other, Ranboo not caring about the discomfort of eye contact. After a few seconds, the hybrid gave the smallest of replies with a very quiet ‘please’. And then before Sam could say no, Ranboo got another idea and was talking again. “What if-! What if I paid you? What if I paid you to put me in the prison, huh? Would you- Would you do it then?”
“No. There is nothing whatsoever that would get me to put you in a prison like that. That’s meant for dangerous people and you are not a dangerous person. Not like Dream is. You haven’t done anything wrong. Most likely you’re imagining it. I think you should go home and get some rest, especially since it looks like we spent most of the night talking.”
Ranboo looked up to see light starting to appear from the sunrise. Mumbo also tried once more to convince Ranboo to go home, and that seemed to finally get through to the hybrid. He started nodding a little, Sam sighing in relief, but then Ranboo changed his mind. “What if I put myself in Sam?”
“You can’t get in there Ranboo. It’s closed right now.”
“Really? What if you forgot? Huh? What if you left it open?”
“No. Ranboo, I am not locking you in there. You’re a good person.”
“If I’m a good person, then you can trust me and you can trust my judgement.”
Sam cursed a bit, sounding a bit inhuman with a hiss. “No. No. Ranboo, you're a good person, but right now I don’t think you’re in the right mindset. You should get some rest and I’m sure you’ll realize you don’t need to be locked up.”
“But I’m blwnnn… I- I’ve blown… Man, I… I can’t say it.” Ranboo sighed, looking down at the ground. While Mumbo didn’t want them to get locked up, it was clear to him that this was eating Ranboo up. “I think I’m the one who bl-” and then it felt like there was someone clamping down on this throat. It felt cold, like falling into the void, but also felt like a shackle holding him down. He wanted to claw at his throat, but Ranboo was in control again and Mumbo had no body of his own.
He barely paid attention to the conversation until Ranboo started to walk away. “Fine. Fine. I’ll go. I’ll go home. Okay… you have no idea what you’ve done. I… I’m not a good person. I really don’t think so.”
Ranboo walked until he was out of Sam’s hearing range and then he stopped again. He looked down as his fists, which were balled up in anger and shaking a bit. “I know what I need to do.”
“And what’s that Ranboo?” Mumbo asked, hoping it was to finally go rest at home.
“If I’m not going to be put in there, I at least need answers. And the only way to do that is to keep experimenting.”
“What?! Ranboo, no! For all we know your experiments are the cause of all this! You can’t just torture yourself and hope it works out.”
“Well what am I supposed to do? I can’t trust myself to not hurt anyone again!”
“But you can trust me.” Mumbo said quietly.
“What?”
“You can trust me.” Mumbo said louder. “If… if Sam won’t let you into his prison, then we’ll build you one for yourself. We can gather up the redstone supplies we need and I can build you your own personal cell. We’ll tell Tubbo enough so that he can make sure you don’t get out and keep you fed, alright? Does that sound good?”
Ranboo paused, thinking it over before nodding. “Okay. Yeah. We can do that. You… you’re really going to build it?”
“Yes.” Mumbo replied. Was he lying? Only slightly. They would build a cell but he would make it complicated so that hopefully it never got finished and would just exhaust Ranboo so he couldn’t do anything dangerous to himself or others. He could do this. It was just like boring someone to sleep with redstone explanations, just a bit more complicated. “So, let’s get ready to go mining.”
