Incident: Don’t Call Me Crazy
One of the most sensitive and difficult topics that hits home for me is mental illness and the importance of mental health. An observation that I have made overtime is that my generation is a lot more accepting and willing to admit they are having mental health issues and are struggling. Other generations such as my parents are not necessarily as understanding and less educated on this aspect of life. I have struggled for most of my life with anxiety, depression, and OCD but I have often been negatively impacted by the ignorance of others and comments that are made by people who may not even realize what they are saying is wrong.
For the most part, my parents have been very helpful in my journey of seeking help and getting treatment for these issues I was facing and still continue to battle every day. Although they may not understand all of my feelings or know how to handle my emotions, my mom and dad were always there for me and I knew I could go to them and express my needs or what was going wrong. Other people in my family however still seemed unwilling to learn or grasp the concept of what I struggle with. Not that I don't love them unconditionally, but I know that they are ignorant on the topic.
I went over my parents house today to visit, and my uncle was there visiting as well. I ended up expressing to them (my parents and my uncle) that I was feeling very anxious and gloomy. My uncle tells me to just get over it and stop thinking negatively. Obviously, if you are someone who struggles with mental illness, you know that you cant just shut it off. I began to explain to him that I can’t simply do what he was telling me to, but somewhere along the way it turned into an argument. I tried my best to stay calm and talk it out. I started applying my knowledge of what I have learned in my classes in order to turn this conversation around, and I wanted to get my point across to help him understand my illness. Although I was being respectful and no longer was raising my voice, my uncle told me to “Stop with the psychological bullshit.” This offended me, more than I expected it would. I felt hurt and put down, and in some way it made me feel as though he wasn't supportive of me or my career that I was going to be pursuing (mental health counseling). It sounded like he was putting down my struggles, and also psychology as a whole. I may have been taking it out of proportion in the heat of the moment, but I felt my feelings were still valid.
After his comment, a lump formed in my throat. I felt weak, angry, and frustrated. I ended up yelling again, unable to control it because of how sensitive this issue was for me. He then called me a spaz, and that's when I had to leave the room. This situation made me feel more misunderstood than ever. I was being called a spaz and looked at as crazy by someone simply because they were refusing to listen.
I know that this does not make my struggles any less important or my feelings any less valid. Mental illness is something that impacts 1 in 5 people, so it isn't anything to be ashamed of. Spread awareness and check on the people around you to see how they are doing. The more we talk about mental health and educate people, the less others will experience the same problem that I had to experience today.
