✧ now playing: Sex on Fire by Kings of Leon ┃ masterlist
laceys note ; idek where I went with this I just though this was FUNNT ASF, anyway the writing is kinda bad but I hope yall like anyway! (kinda left yous on a cliff hanger sorry lol x) comments, reblogs and feedback means so much, plsss don’t be a silent reader cause ily all babies! pls enjoy 😚
Jay had not come to London to fall victim to a pretty face.
He’d come to perform — four nights, sold out, every seat filled with people who knew every word to every song. He’d come to give everything he had to a crowd that gave it right back, to stand under lights so bright they bleached the world white, to feel that particular kind of electric that only existed on stage.
He had not come to get distracted.
Yet.
The club was Heeseung’s idea — we have one night left, we’re in London, we are going out — delivered with the kind of finality that left zero room for arguments.
So here Jay was, drink in hand, bass vibrating through the soles of his shoes, surrounded by his members in a dark corner booth that their manager had quietly secured. No fanfare. No announcement. Just seven boys finally, finally exhaling after months of controlled chaos.
He was happy. Genuinely. The kind of loose, warm happy that only came after weeks of adrenaline finally releasing its grip on your nervous system.
He was also, apparently, very easy to distract.
Because that’s when he saw you.
You weren’t doing anything extraordinary. That was the thing that got him.
You weren’t performing for the room the way some people did — no extravagant hair flips, no eyes scanning for attention, no body angled that said look at me.
You were just — there. Present. Laughing at something your friend had said, head thrown back, completely unbothered by the hundred of sweaty bodies pressing in around you.
You were wearing something that made his mouth go dry but that wasn’t even the thing that got him. It was the way you occupied the space around you. Like you owned it without trying. Like the club had been built specifically to frame you and you alone.
Jay noticed everything about you.
“You’re staring,” Heeseung said into his ear, without even looking up from his drink.
“I’m observing,” Jay said.
“At a specific person.”
“At the area.”
Heeseung finally looked up, followed his eyeline across the dancefloor, and made a sound of quiet understanding. “Ah.”
“Don’t.” Jay said.
“I didn’t say anything.”
“You were about to.”
Heeseung smiled into his drink and said nothing. Which was somehow worse.
Jay looked back at you. You’d moved slightly, swaying now to whatever the DJ had shifted into, your friends forming a loose orbit around you. Still laughing. Still completely unaware of him staring at you like you’re a goddess.
The thing was it was usually him being looked at — cameras, crowds, eyes tracking his every move from pit to balcony. People looked at Jay Park. That was just a fact of his life, as constant and unremarkable as breathing.
You weren’t looking at him and it was driving him insane.
He drained the rest of his drink in one gulp, set the glass down with a quiet click. “Back in a bit,” he said.
Heeseung didn’t even look up. “Sure you are.”
Jay was already moving.
The thing about London clubs was the heat. Thick and immediate, the kind that soaked into your skin the second you stepped onto the floor. You’d stopped noticing it an hour ago, too caught up in the music, in your friends, in the freedom of a night with nowhere to be and nothing to do but exist in it.
Your friend had said something about drinks and disappeared toward the bar. You’d stayed, unbothered, moving easily to the bass line currently vibrating through the floor, through your bones, through everything.
You didn’t hear him coming over, though you wouldn’t have — the music too loud, the crowd too thick. The first thing you registered was warmth. A presence behind you, close but not touching, giving you the choice.
You turned your head slightly. Just enough.
He was tall. Dark eyes catching the strobe light for just a second before the room plunged dim again. Sharp jaw, pretty mouth curved at the corner like he already knew something you didn’t. He smelled expensive — cedar and something warmer underneath, something that made you want to lean in to identify it properly.
A stranger. A very, very attractive stranger.
You faced forward again and didn’t move away. That was all the answer he needed.
His hands found your waist — light at first, barely there, a question more than a statement. When you didn’t pull away he settled them properly, warm and sure against your hips, and moved with you.
He was a good dancer. Effortlessly, annoyingly good. His body found your rhythm without fumbling for it, hips rolling slow and deliberate against yours, chest warm against your back. Not aggressive. Just — assured. Like he had all the time in the world and intended to use it.
You relaxed back into him by degrees, almost without deciding to. His lips found the curve of your ear.
“You’ve been ignoring this whole room all night,” he said, voice low, cutting clean through the noise like it was meant only for you. A trace of an accent you couldn’t quite place. “How come?”
You tipped your head back slightly against his shoulder, glancing up at him from the corner of your eye. “Maybe the room wasn’t worth paying attention to,” you said.
The smile that pulled at his mouth was slow and devastating. His grip on your hips tightened — just slightly. Just enough. “And now?” he asked.
You turned in his hold then, fully, facing him for the first time.
Up close he was even more disarming — something almost familiar about his face that you couldn’t place, like a word on the tip of your tongue. You let your hands rest against his chest and felt the warmth of him through the fabric.
“Jury’s still out,” you said.
He laughed. Low and genuine, surprised like he hadn’t expected that. Like most people didn’t say that to him.
“Jay,” he said, offering his name like something casual. Like it cost him nothing and this case, it didn’t.
You gave him yours. He repeated it back to you once, quiet, testing the shape of it — and something about the way he said it made your stomach pull tight.
The song shifted. Heavier. Slower in a way that wasn’t slow at all.
Jay’s eyes dropped to your mouth for just a second. Came back up.
“Dance with me properly,” he said. Less a question, more like inevitability. You did.
He knew exactly what he was doing — every movement deliberate, every shift of his hips calculated to make your brain short circuit. His hands roamed with confidence, never rushed, tracing the curve of your waist, your hips, the small of your back — like he was learning you by touch alone and intended to be thorough about it.
You’d stopped thinking about your friends approximately four songs ago.
The music was filthy — bass so heavy it felt physical, the kind of track that gave everyone on the floor permission to stop pretending. Bodies pressed in around you both, hot and close, the air thick with sweat and perfume and the particular electricity of a room full of people who’d decided to stop caring.
Jay’s chest was flush against your back, one hand splayed flat across your stomach, the other gripping your hip hard. His mouth was at your ear, your jaw, occasionally brushing the side of your neck without quite committing to it — just enough to make you acutely aware of exactly where his lips weren’t.
You rolled your hips back against him deliberately. His grip tightened. A sharp exhale against your neck.
“Don’t start something you’re not finishing,” he murmured, voice dropped low and rough in a way that had absolutely nothing to do with the noise around you.
You turned your head, mouth close to his jaw. “Who said I’m not finishing it?”
The sound he made was barely audible over the music. But you felt it — a low noise in his chest, something unravelling at the edges.
His mouth found your neck properly then and your eyes fell shut for a second, fingers curling into the hand he had splayed across your stomach.
He turned you around in one smooth motion, hands cupping your face, tilting it up. His eyes were dark, pupils blown wide, all that easy confidence stripped back to something more urgent underneath.
“Tell me to stop,” he said. Giving you the out.
“Jay.” His name in your mouth for the first time, and the way his jaw tightened when you said it — god. “I’m not telling you to stop.”
His thumb traced your lower lip. Just once. “Good,” he said quietly.
He took your hand.
The crowd swallowed you both as he navigated through the bodies with practiced ease, one hand firm in yours, pulling you toward the back corridor of the club where the noise dimmed by degrees — still audible, still thumping through the walls, but muffled now. Distant. Like the rest of the world had agreed to give you both a moment.
The bathroom door. He pushed it open, checked it was empty, pulled you in after him. The lock clicked behind you.
And then he turned around and looked at you in the dim light of the single overhead bulb — chest rising and falling, hair slightly dishevelled from the dancefloor, mouth curving into that same devastating smile from earlier.
Except closer now. So much closer.
“Hi,” he said softly. Almost like he was seeing you properly for the first time.
Something about it made your breath catch.
“Hi,” you said back.
He kissed you.
He kissed different to how you expected. Slower. More deliberate. Like he was in absolutely no rush despite the fact that you were in a club bathroom and the bass was still thumping through the walls like a second heartbeat. His thumbs traced your cheekbones while his mouth moved against yours, drawing you in deep and unhurried until you were gripping the front of his shirt just to have something to hold onto.
He pulled back just enough to look at you. Eyes dark, chest rising and falling, that insufferable almost-smile playing at the corner of his mouth.
“You have no idea,” he said quietly, “how long I’ve been thinking about doing that.”
“You saw me forty minutes ago,” you managed.
“Long forty minutes.”
You laughed despite yourself and he swallowed it, kissing you again — deeper this time, hungrier, one hand sliding from your jaw into your hair while the other traced the curve of your waist, your hip, the hem of your skirt.
His mouth dropped to your neck. Open and warm, tongue dragging slow across your pulse point while his fingers toyed with the waistband of your underwear — not pushing in yet, just tracing the elastic, back and forth, until you shifted your hips toward him without meaning to.
He noticed. Of course he noticed. “Tell me what you want,” he murmured against your throat.
“Jay—”
“Tell me.” Not harsh. Just certain. Like he had all the time in the world and intended to use every second of it.
“Touch me,” you breathed. “Please.”
The please seemed to do something to him — jaw tightening against your neck, a low noise in his chest. “Good girl,” he said softly. “Was that so hard?”
His fingers slipped beneath the fabric. The sound you made when he made contact was immediate and mortifying — a sharp gasp that you muffled against his shoulder, fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt.
He stroked through your folds slowly, gathering the slick heat of you, and made a sound himself — low and reverent, like he’d been handed something precious.
“God,” he breathed. “Already?”
“Don’t,” you started.
“I’m not teasing.” He pulled back to look at you, completely sincere, eyes dark and blown wide. “That’s — you’re incredible. You know that?”
You didn’t know what to do with that. With the way he said it — not performative, not practiced. Just honest.
He pressed a single kiss to the corner of your mouth and then sank two fingers inside you. Your head dropped back against the wall.
He worked you open with devastating patience — fingers curling, pace building slow and deliberate, heel of his palm grinding against your clit while he watched your face with an intensity that felt almost like too much. Like he was cataloguing every micro-expression, every caught breath, storing them somewhere.
“Let me hear you,” he said quietly. “Don’t hold back.”
“People will—”
“Let them.” His fingers curled harder and your argument dissolved into a moan that you couldn’t have swallowed if you tried.
“There.” His voice dropped lower, rougher. “There it is. Just like that.” He did it again. Deliberately. Just to hear you repeat it.
“Jay—” His name breaking apart in your mouth, thighs trembling around his hand, the wet obscene sound of his fingers working you open loud in the small tiled space. “Jay, I’m — god, I’m going to—”
“Yeah you are,” he said, almost conversationally, eyes fixed entirely on your face. “Come on. Let me hear it. Want to hear you say my name when you come.”
It hit you like a current — rolling deep and devastating, your whole body shuddering, his name tearing from your throat exactly like he’d asked for it, fingers clenching around his wrist to hold him there while he worked you through every aftershock with merciless patience.
“Perfect,” he breathed, almost to himself. “Absolutely perfect.”
You were still shaking when he withdrew his fingers, brought them to his mouth without breaking eye contact, and sucked them clean. Your brain simply ceased functioning entirely.
“Jay.” Your voice came out wrecked. “If you don’t—”
“I know.” He was already reaching into his back pocket. “I know, I’ve got you.”
He rolled the condom on with steady hands, pushed your skirt up properly, and then his hands found the backs of your thighs and hoisted you up against the wall in one clean motion — your legs locking around his waist automatically, his forearms braced either side of your head.
He looked at you for just a second. Hair wrecked, lips swollen, holding your entire weight like it was nothing. “Still good?” he asked.
“If you don’t move right now—”
He pushed inside.
The stretch was immediate and overwhelming — thick and deep, splitting you open on a slow relentless slide until he was fully seated and you were gasping open mouthed against his jaw, nails marking into his shoulder skin through the fabric of his shirt.
He stilled. Just for a moment. Forehead dropping to yours, jaw tight with the effort of it. “Fuck,” he breathed. Genuine. . “You feel — god, you feel unreal.”
Then he moved.
Long, deep strokes that drove the air from your lungs completely — his hips snapping up into yours with a precision that suggested he knew exactly what he was doing and had zero intention of pretending otherwise. The wall creaked behind you. Your sounds were swallowed by the bass through the walls but barely, barely — every thrust punching a noise out of you that you couldn’t contain.
“Louder,” he said against your ear, low and rough. “Come on. Want to hear you.”
“Jay—”
“Louder.” His pace intensified, one hand gripping your thigh so hard you’d see it tomorrow, the other braced against the wall. “Let me hear how good it feels. Need to hear it.”
You stopped trying to muffle yourself.
The noise that left you was unrestrained — his name, fragmented and desperate, and the effect it had on him was instantaneous. His rhythm stuttered, a rough groan against your neck, hips snapping harder and more erratic.
“Yeah,” he breathed, strained. “Yeah, exactly like that, you’re doing so — fuck—”
He shifted suddenly — lowering you, turning you, bending you forward over the edge of the sink with a gentleness that contradicted the urgency of it entirely. Hands smoothing down your spine like he had all the time in the world while you gripped the porcelain edge and caught your own reflection in the mirror — wrecked and flushed, Jay behind you, jaw set with concentration.
His eyes found yours in the mirror. Held them. “Watch,” he said quietly.
He pushed back inside from this angle and the sound you both made simultaneously was obscene.
Deeper like this. Meaner. His hands gripping your hips, pulling you back onto him with each thrust, the slap of skin loud and rhythmic and filthy. But his eyes never left yours in the mirror — watching every expression cross your face, drinking it in, that same focused intensity like you were the only thing worth looking at in the entire world.
“Tell me how it feels,” he said, breathless now, composure finally fraying at every edge. “Tell me.”
“So good,” you managed, barely. “Jay — god — so good, don’t stop—”
“Not stopping.” His jaw was tight, pace relentless. “Not even close. You’re—” He exhaled roughly. “You’re unbelievable, absolute—”
The second orgasm hit you without warning — sudden and total, clenching around him so hard your vision fractured white, his name coming out of you in a broken keen that echoed off the tiles.
He followed immediately — burying himself deep with a rough groan muffled against your shoulder, hips grinding slow and deliberate while he spilled into the condom, shuddering once, twice, then going completely still.
Silence. Just breathing. And the muffled bass through the walls. And both of you wrecked and trembling and not quite ready to move.
He pressed his lips to the back of your neck. Soft. Unhurried. Like a full stop. “You okay?” he murmured.
“I don’t know what I am,” you said honestly.
He laughed quietly against your skin. Steadied you as he withdrew, disposed of the condom, smoothed your skirt back down with careful hands like you were something worth taking care of.
You turned around. Faced him in the dim light.
His hair was destroyed. His mouth was swollen. His eyes were soft in a way that felt wildly at odds with the last twenty minutes and somehow made it worse.
His phone buzzed. Once. Twice. Three times. Something shifted in his expression — almost imperceptible, there and gone. He glanced at the screen and something complicated moved behind his eyes.
“I have to go,” he said. The words landed soft but final.
You blinked. Searched his face. “Right now?”
“Right now.” He looked genuinely pained about it, nothing like you’d have expected from a stranger in a club bathroom. Just — sorry. Actually sorry. “I’m sorry. I wouldn’t if I didn’t have to.”
You studied him for a moment. Believed him, somehow, in a way you couldn’t entirely explain. “Okay,” you said quietly.
He stepped forward, cupped your face in both hands with a tenderness that felt wildly disproportionate to the last twenty minutes, and kissed you — slow and soft and thorough, like he was committing something to memory.
When he pulled back his eyes stayed closed for just a second longer than necessary.
“You were incredible,” he murmured against your lips. “Truly.”
And then he was gone — door swinging shut behind him, footsteps disappearing into the noise of the club, swallowed immediately by the crowd like he’d never been there at all.
You stood in the dim bathroom light. Chest still heaving. Lips still warm.
You didn’t even know his last name.
—
“Why am I here,” you said, trying and unsuccessfully to dig your heels into the pavement to stop Ava from dragging you. “You know I don’t even listen to them.”
“That’s exactly why you need to come,” she shot back, not slowing for a second. “Character development.”
“This is not character development, this is kidnapping.” She ignored you completely, flashing your tickets at the staff and pulling you inside before you could protest further. Trapping you unfortunatly.
The noise hit you immediately — screaming bleeding through the walls, that loud screeching kind that only existed at concerts. You grimaced. “I feel underdressed for this level of commitment.”
“You’ll survive.”
“I might not.”
“You will. And you’re going to thank me later.”
“Unlikely.”
She finally stopped once you were inside, turning to face you with a look that said she was entirely too pleased with herself. “You’re being dramatic.”
“I’m being honest. Why didn’t you just bring Mei? She actually likes them.”
“She bailed.”
“Convenient.”
“Also,” your friend added, narrowing her eyes slightly, “you need to get out more.”
You let out a dry laugh. “I go out.”
“Hooking up with mysterious strangers in clubs does not count as social enrichment.”
Your stomach dropped. Just slightly. Just enough. You forced your expression to stay neutral (you’re almost certain you failed to do so though). “That was one time.”
She wasn’t listening to you anymore, instead she was shoving further through the crowd, hand around your wrist and dragging you with a lot more force than earlier. “Move, move—oh my god, move!”
“Ava—” you stumbled as she yanked you forward again, nearly knocking into a group of girls already screaming near the front. “Ava, we’re going to be squashed.”
“We are not standing in the back like losers,” Ava snapped, squeezing between people with zero shame. “I did not fight for these tickets just to see them as tiny little pixels with my own eyes.”
“You’re going to kill me.”
“Worth it for a banging view.”
You barely had time to argue before she finally stopped—right up against the metal barricade, hands gripping until her knuckles were white like she’d reached salvation and was clinging to it. “Oh my god,” she breathed, eyes wide, already completely gone. “We’re so close.”
You looked around, slightly stunned. She’d actually done it. “You’re insane,” you said.
“And yet—” she shot you a grin, breathless, “—you love me.”
You rolled your eyes, but before you could respond the lights cut. The screams that followed felt like they could tear the roof off the building. Ava grabbed your arm instantly, her nails marking crescents into your skin. “THIS IS IT.”
You winced. “You’re yelling directly into my ear.”
“Shut up, they’re coming—”
They walked out. Seven of them. You weren’t really paying attention at first — just shapes, movement, noise — until Ava started yelling next to you, gripping your arm harder now.
“That one—” she shouted over the music, pointing. “That’s Jay, I told you about him—”
You followed her finger. And everything in your body went completely still.
No.
No, that—
That’s not—
But it was.
Same face. Same eyes. Same mouth. Just under stage lights now instead of a dim bathroom light.
Jay. The same Jay that fucked you in a bathroom last night and called you ‘good girl’ and made you come until you saw stars was now standing on stage in front of thousands of people. Singing and dancing like it was normal.
Like he was normal.
Your hand flew to Ava’s sleeve and your grip tightened unconsciously around it. “That’s—” you started, but your voice didn’t come out right.
“What?” she yelled, not looking at you she’s too fixated on them (you couldn’t blame her anymore). “Isn’t he insane?”
You couldn’t breathe properly. He moved closer to the front of the stage and for a split second—
His eyes swept across the crowd. Until they locked right at the barricade. On you.
It was brief. So brief you could’ve convinced yourself you imagined it. Except—
His expression changed. Just slightly, almost barely notable until the glow of the stage lights but you noticed. It was that same flicker you’d seen in the bathroom when his phone buzzed.
⌗ in which . . . you and park jongseong, engaged by an arrangement, lose all restraint in one jealous penthouse night
流星 ໑ . . fiancé!jay x fem!reader
⌗ includes . . . smut (18+), possessive partner, arranged engagement, vulgar language, oral sex (f. receiving), multiple orgasms, so much overstimulation, jay is aggressive as shit, degradation & praise mix, creampie, shit ton of filthy talk, exhibitionism, unprotected sex (don’t), just a lot of filthy things in general, please don’t imprison me 💔 ➜ mdni ! or do.. it's up to you ♡ purely a work of fiction, none of this is real | wc 5.9k
♪ el’s bubble: man, i miss jay ya’ll i dug real hard into my saved documents to find this beast from back in december (this was made because i was stuck in an airport and i was feeling FREAKY 😛 i just remember making this incredibly freaky.. like multiple rounds type shit.. & i had to time out and stuff because what the hell was this 🥀 yes, even president el spiraled over the filthiness of this ! I’M A CHANGED & LESS FREAKED OUT EL NOW, OKAY ☹️) so, yes, this is five months old. i was incredibly obsessed with this song too so there’s that . . gotta keep pushing even though i’m lowkenuinely going insane over the mafialeader!riki fic 💪 not proofread, enjoy — likes, reblogs, and feedbacks are deeply appreciated on here ♡ requests are always open if you want to see me write something specific ۫ ׅ
tags: @wonscapes @simsimluver @maishee @grdientlips @kristynaaah @psychicdazestrawberry @heesroses @vmpiricou @seungiesdoll | just ask if you want to be a part of my tag list ˙𐃷˙
now playing . . . love me harder by ariana grande & the weeknd
The night begins in a polished silence that feels heavier than conversation.
It's the kind that follows a public dinner where everything was perfectly performed but nothing felt real, and in the private elevator ride upward, you and Jay stand side by side without touching, yet hyper-aware of each other's presence in a way that makes even the smallest movement feel loaded with things neither of you are saying.
You don't look at him.
You don't need to.
You can feel the restrained energy radiating off him, the way he's holding himself with that infuriating composure that makes everyone else look slightly unsure of themselves.
The elevator's soft lighting catches the sharp line of his jaw, the fitted polo shirt that hugs his broad shoulders and chest in a way that should be illegal at a formal event.
You've spent too long pretending you don't notice these things, the way he fills a room without trying, the calm authority in his posture, how unfairly put-together he looks even now in private.
But tonight it's way, way, way worse.
Tonight you keep catching the small things you're not supposed to care about.
The way he looked across the table when someone else made you laugh.
The controlled silence he kept instead of reacting.
The fact that he never asks questions he doesn't already know the answer to.
Worse than anything else is the realization you refuse to say out loud, that you don't just see him clearly, you always have.
Even when you were supposed to be treating him like a contract, not a weakness.
The dinner replays in your mind on a loop.
The rival heir, some visiting businessman's son with a silver tongue and wandering eyes, had spent the entire evening making his intentions so damn clear.
He'd leaned too close when he spoke to you, laughed too loudly at your quiet responses, let his gaze drag over you like he had every right to look.
His hand had found your arm at one point, fingers lingering on your bare skin, and you'd felt Jay's attention sharpen from across the table.
Though he hadn't said a word, he had just watched you both, composed as marble.
It stung more than anger would have.
When the elevator doors open to the penthouse, the space is vast, expensive, and quiet in a way that should feel comforting but instead feels isolating.
Floor-to-ceiling windows display the glittering sprawl of the city below, but neither of you pauses to admire it.
You move through the room separately, shedding the weight of public appearances without acknowledging how tense the air between you has become.
You head toward the walk-in closet without a word, a room so large it feels like its own world, and begin removing your jewelry slowly, methodically.
The diamond earrings first, then the bracelet, each piece placed with deliberate care on the velvet tray.
Your fingers find the clasp of your necklace, but the angle is awkward, and you abandon it in favor of working on the pins in your hair.
It's something to do with your hands.
Something to ground you while your thoughts stay tangled on the dinner, on the way Jay barely reacted, on everything he didn't say.
You're so lost in your own head that you don't hear him approach.
He enters without announcing himself, stopping just inside the doorway rather than fully stepping in.
The silence stretches.
For a moment there's only the sound of fabric shifting and the distant hum of the city filtering through glass walls.
You don't turn around.
"Jay, can you help me with the zipper?"
It comes out casually.
Almost way too casually, like you're trying to ignore how aware you are of him standing there.
How the temperature in the room seems to have risen ten degrees just from his proximity.
He approaches in silence.
You feel him before you see him, the warmth of his body, the subtle shift of air as he moves closer.
His hands are steady when they reach for the zipper at the back of your dress, but there's a pause before he touches you that feels like hesitation he doesn't allow himself to name.
Then the zipper begins to move.
He takes his time.
Slowly, with deliberate patience that feels almost like punishment.
The metal teeth give way one by one, exposing the smooth skin of your back inch by inch, and you can feel his gaze following the progress like a physical touch.
You exhale in frustration.
"Damn it, Jay, speed it up."
Your voice is sharper than you intended.
Behind you, Jay goes entirely still.
"This isn't part of the agreement people think exists between us."
His voice is calm and controlled.
But you can tell that there's something underneath it, something dark and tightly leashed.
You turn your head slightly, just enough to catch his profile in your peripheral vision.
"Neither is the way you keep acting like you're unaffected when you clearly notice everything."
That makes him pause.
The zipper stops halfway down your back.
"Excuse me?"
You turn more fully now, and there's something dangerous in the way his dark eyes meet yours.
You've spent too many nights biting your tongue, too many public events swallowing the words that want to spill out.
Tonight, something in you snaps.
"You deadass just sat there all evening, watching that guy come close to me. You didn’t even bother saying a fucking word at all while he—" You cut yourself off, jaw tightening.
"While he what?" Jay's voice drops lower. "While he looked at you like you belonged to him? While he touched your arm and made you smile? While he spent the entire dinner trying to fuck you with his eyes?"
The crudeness in his tone catches you off guard.
He never speaks like this, never lets the polished veneer slip enough to show the raw hunger underneath.
"Please, just look at your pathetic self," you say quietly, almost to yourself. "You're shaking."
He is.
Just barely, a fine tremor in his hands that he's trying to hide.
"God, it eats me alive."
The confession comes out in a low, controlled voice that cracks at the edges.
"Watching someone else look at you tonight. Having to sit there pretending it didn't matter. Pretending I don't—" He stops himself, jaw clenching so hard you swear you can see the muscle jump.
You should step away.
You should remind him of all the practical reasons this arrangement exists, all the boundaries you've carefully maintained.
Instead, you hear yourself saying:
"Our arrangement was built on exactly that kind of emotional distance."
The words come out pointed, almost cruel.
You're pushing him.
You know damn well you're pushing him.
"Is jealousy really the first thing you've decided to break the rules over?"
Something shifts in his expression.
The mask slips, just for a moment, and beneath it you see something raw and unguarded desperation, maybe.
Want.
Hunger that's been starved for too long.
"It's not just jealousy."
He steps closer.
Close enough that you can feel the heat radiating off his chest, close enough that his breath ghosts across your temple.
"It's the fact that I can't tell anymore where the performance ends and what I actually feel begins."
The words hang between you.
Your heart pounds against your ribs so hard you're certain he can hear it.
This is the closest either of you has ever come to saying it, the thing that's been building for months in loaded glances and accidentally tender moments and nights spent lying awake thinking about the person sleeping in the next room.
Then he reaches for you.
His hand cups your cheek, gentle despite the tension radiating through every line of his body.
His thumb traces the line of your jaw, and his eyes search your face like he's looking for permission, for rejection, for anything that might stop him from doing what he's about to do.
You don't stop him.
He leans in and kisses you.
It starts soft — almost tentative, a question more than a demand.
Then, without warning, you make a sound against his mouth, something small and involuntary, and whatever restraint he had left shatters completely.
His other hand slides into your hair, tilting your head back to deepen the kiss.
The zipper, still halfway down, becomes irrelevant as his hands find your waist, your hips, pulling you against him with an urgency that makes your knees weak.
You feel the hard planes of his chest, the strength in his arms as he holds you, and something hot and demanding pools low in your abdomen.
"Tell me to stop," he murmurs against your lips. "Tell me this is just… tell me you don't want this, and I'll walk away. I'll never bring it up again."
You don't tell him to stop.
Because who are you to tell him to stop?
Instead, you reach for the hem of his polo shirt, pulling it up and over his head in one smooth motion.
The fabric falls to the floor, forgotten, and for a moment you just look at him.
The defined muscles of his chest and abdomen, the way the low light plays across his skin, the steady rise and fall of his breathing.
"You're staring."
"I'm just appreciating." Your voice is dry, but there's no hiding the way your gaze keeps dropping. "Don't pretend you don't know what you look like."
Something like a smile tugs at the corner of his mouth.
Then his hands are on you again, sliding the dress off your shoulders, letting it pool at your feet in a whisper of expensive fabric.
You stand before him in a pair of silk shorts, a bra, and underwear, suddenly aware of how exposed you are, how hungry his eyes look as they travel over you.
"Beautiful," he breathes. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do this. How long I’ve thought about when this would finally come. About—"
He doesn't finish the sentence.
Instead, he pulls you into another kiss, this one deeper, more demanding.
His hands find the waistband of your shorts and tug them down without hesitation, leaving you in just your undergarments.
The cool air hits your heated skin, but you barely notice because he's looking at you like you're an oasis in the middle of a dessert.
You can see the effect this is having on him.
The prominent outline of his erection pressing against his tailored pants, straining against the fabric.
The way his chest rises and falls more quickly now.
The dark intensity in his eyes that makes you feel both powerful and completely at his mercy.
"Jay." His name comes out as a whisper. "Fuck, just… touch me already, please."
He doesn't need to be asked twice.
His hands slide up your sides, thumbs tracing the curve of your breasts through the thin fabric of your bra.
Your head falls back as he explores, learning the map of your body with agonizing thoroughness.
When he finally unclasps the bra and lets it fall, the sound you make is embarrassingly needy, a soft, desperate whimper that you can't hold back.
"Already making sounds for me?" His voice is rough, pleased. "And I've barely even touched you yet."
"I'm not—" You try to protest, but his hand slides lower, fingers slipping beneath the waistband of your underwear, and whatever you were going to say dissolves into a gasp.
"Oh, you're not what? Not wet? Because I can feel how soaked you are through these panties." He presses his palm against you, and your hips jerk involuntarily. "Feel that? That's all for me, because of me."
Your usual silence is crumbling.
Every brush of his fingers, every press of his palms against your heated skin, pulls another sound from your throat, louder than the last.
For someone who's spent the entire relationship holding your tongue, keeping your thoughts locked away, you're making an awful lot of noise now.
And he notices.
Of course he does.
"You're so vocal tonight." His voice is ragged, thick with desire. "I've never heard you make these sounds before. The quiet, composed woman I'm engaged to, the one who barely says two words at dinner, look at you now. Whimpering for me like I’m all that matters."
"I hate you," you manage, but it comes out breathless and unconvincing.
"No, you don't." He presses a finger inside you, and your knees buckle. "You love this. You love, love, love that I can make you fall apart like this. Damn it, just admit it already, won’t you.”
"I—"
"Admit it."
"Fuck, yes." The word tears out of you, louder than you intended. "Yes, I love it. I love your hands on me so, so much. I've thought about this—about you, god—"
He groans against your neck, the sound vibrating through your whole body. "Tell me. Tell me what you've thought about."
"Your mouth." You're past embarrassment now, past holding back. "Your hands. Shit, how you'd feel inside me. How you'd sound when you lose control, things like that."
"Fuck." He pulls his hand away, and you nearly sob at the loss. "I need to taste you right now, pretty ."
He turns you around, walking you backward until your knees hit the edge of the bed.
You fall onto the plush mattress, and he follows you down, settling his weight over you.
For a moment he just looks at you, hair fanned across the pillows, chest heaving, eyes dark with want.
"Tell me what you want," he says. "I’ll hear you out… I need to hear you say it, use your words for me, pretty."
You reach up, palms flat against his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart beneath your fingers.
"You, god, it’s you, Jay. I want you, all of you, actually. Your mouth, your fingers, your cock—I want everything."
He exhales shakily.
Then he's kissing down your body, lips trailing fire across your collarbone, your sternum, the soft skin of your stomach.
When he hooks his fingers into your underwear and pulls it off, you're completely bare beneath him.
"Spread your legs for me, gorgeous."
The command makes heat flood through you.
You obey, and he settles between your thighs, breath warm against your most sensitive skin.
Then his mouth is on you, and you genuinely forgot how to keep your mouth shut.
A loud, broken moan tears from your throat.
Your back arches off the bed as his tongue works against you, slow, deliberate strokes that make your thighs tremble.
He finds the spots that make you gasp, the pressure that makes your hands fist in the sheets, and he exploits every single one.
"Jay—oh god—oh fuck—"
"That's it." The vibration of his voice against you makes you jerk. "Let me hear you. I want the whole building to know who's making you feel this good."
Your usual silence shatters completely.
Moans and gasps and desperate cries spill from your lips without permission, each one louder than the last.
You can't control it, can't hold back, not when he's doing that with his tongue, not when his hands are gripping your thighs to hold you open for him.
"More, please, please, fuck—don't stop—"
He hums against you, and the pleasure spikes. Your hips roll against his face without your permission, chasing the sensation, and he lets you.
Encourages it, even.
His hands slide under your ass to tilt you closer to his mouth.
"You taste so fucking good," he growls against your flesh. "I could do this for hours, gorgeous. Eat this pretty pussy until you can't think, can't speak, can't do anything but come on my tongue."
The filthy words send a jolt through you.
You've never heard him talk like this, never imagined the composed, controlled man you're engaged to had this side to him.
"You're close, aren't you?" He sucks on your clit, and you scream. "I can feel it. You're shaking. Come for me. Come on my face."
"Jay—Jay—I'm—"
The orgasm crashes through you without warning.
Your whole body seizes, back bowing off the bed as pleasure whites out your vision.
You hear yourself screaming his name, but it sounds distant, muffled by the roaring in your ears.
He works you through it, tongue never stopping, drawing out every last aftershock until you're twitching and oversensitive.
When he finally pulls back, you're trembling and breathless.
He rises over you again, lips glistening with your arousal, and you can see how much this has affected him, the heavy-lidded desire in his eyes, the way his body is straining toward yours.
"I want to be inside you," he growls. "Now, literally now. I can't fucking wait anymore."
He reaches for his pants, undoing them with shaking hands and shoving them down his thighs.
His boxers follow, and then he's naked before you, and you have a moment to appreciate the body he's been hiding under all those perfectly fitted polo shirts.
He's gorgeous.
Lean muscle and defined lines and hard, flushed cock jutting from a nest of dark hair.
Thick.
The tip glistening with precum.
He catches you staring and smirks. "See something you like?"
"Stop fishing for compliments and just fuck me already."
A surprised laugh escapes him, the first genuine sound you've heard from him all night.
Then he's climbing over you, positioning himself at your entrance, and the laughter fades into something much more intense.
"Tell me if you need me to stop."
You nod.
He pushes forward, slowly, letting your body adjust to the stretch.
The sensation is overwhelming, the fullness, the intimacy of being connected like this after months of careful distance.
"Fuck—you're so tight, so sexy." His voice is strained. "So wet, so fucking wet. You're dripping around me."
"Move. Please. I need you to move."
He obeys.
Slow at first, deep strokes that make you gasp with each thrust.
His forehead rests against yours, breath mingling, eyes locked on your face like he's memorizing every reaction.
"You feel incredible." He groans, hips rolling. "Better than I could’ve ever imagined, and I imagined this a lot, baby. Every night. Fucking my fist thinking about you."
"Jay—"
"I'd think about your face when you come. The sounds you'd make. Now… shit—here you are, underneath me, taking my cock so well."
His words make you clench around him, and he hisses.
You're being vocal again, gasps and moans and cries that fill the room, each sound spilling out without your permission.
"You like that? You like hearing how much I want you?" He thrusts deeper, hitting a spot that makes you cry out. "You like knowing that your fake fiancé has been obsessing over you? That I've been desperate to get my hands on you?"
"Yes—yes—fuck, more—harder—"
"Harder?" He obeys, snapping his hips faster. "Like this? You want me to ruin you?"
"Yes! God, yes, ruin me—please—"
His pace increases.
You're being so loud now, louder than you've ever been during sex, louder than you thought possible.
Each thrust punches another sound out of you, and the more noise you make, the faster he goes.
"That's it. Scream for me. Let me hear you." His voice is ragged, barely controlled. "The neighbors are going to know exactly who's making you feel this good. They're going to hear you screaming my name and know that you're mine."
He shifts your leg higher over his hip, changing the angle, and suddenly he's hitting that spot with every thrust.
The pleasure is overwhelming, building inside you like a wave about to break.
"You're going to come for me again, aren't you? I can feel you squeezing me. You're so, so close."
"Yes—so close—please—"
"Fuck, come—come on my cock. Let me feel you."
The orgasm tears through you, even more intense than the first.
You scream his name, back arching, nails raking down his back hard enough to leave marks.
He groans above you, hips stuttering as your walls clench around him, but he doesn't stop.
He fucks you through it, maintaining the pace, drawing out your pleasure until you're trembling and overstimulated.
"One more," he growls. "Give me one more."
"I can't—too much—"
"You can, you will. For me—just for me."
He pulls out suddenly, and you whimper at the loss.
But then he's flipping you over, pulling your hips up until you're on your hands and knees, face pressed into the pillow.
"This position." His hands smooth over your ass, squeezing. "I've thought about this. Having you like this. Face down, ass up, completely at my mercy."
He pushes back inside in one smooth thrust, and you moan into the pillow.
"No." He tangles a hand in your hair, pulling your head back. "I want to hear you, pretty. Don't muffle those lovely sounds."
He starts moving, harder now, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling the room.
You're loud again, cries and moans and desperate sounds that echo off the walls.
"You take me so deep like this." His grip tightens in your hair. "Feel that? Feel how deep I am? I'm hitting spots you didn't even know existed."
"Yes—yes—so deep—fuck—"
"This is what you do to me." His hips snap forward, relentless. "You drive me insane. Walking around this penthouse in those tiny ass shorts. Cooking dinner with that concentrated look on your face. Making me want you when I'm supposed to be pretending I don't."
"Jay—"
"I've jerked off to the thought of you more times than I can count. Thought about bending you over every surface in this apartment. About making you scream so loud the whole city knows you belong to me."
His words are pushing you toward another peak.
You're so loud now, practically screaming with each thrust, and every sound you make seems to drive him faster.
"I love hearing you." His voice is strained, desperate. "I love knowing I'm the one making you lose control. The quiet, composed woman everyone else sees—she doesn't exist when I'm inside you. It's just me. Just us."
"Harder—please—I'm going to—"
"Come for me, pretty. Come on my cock again. I want to feel you fall apart."
The third orgasm hits you like a freight train. You scream, body convulsing, and he groans behind you as your walls clench around him.
This time he doesn't hold back, his rhythm becomes erratic, hips pistoning faster, chasing his own release.
"I'm going to come," he growls. "Where do you want it? Inside? On your ass? Tell me—"
"Inside, please—fuck, Jay, I need to feel you—"
He thrusts deep one final time, burying himself to the hilt as he comes with a guttural groan.
You feel the pulse of his release, the heat flooding your insides, and it triggers one last small orgasm that makes you whimper.
He collapses beside you, both of you breathing hard, bodies slick with sweat.
For a long moment, there's only the sound of your ragged breathing and the distant hum of the city.
Then he laughs, low and exhausted and genuine.
"I had no idea you were that loud."
You bury your face in the pillow, suddenly self-conscious. "I've never—I'm not usually—"
"I'm not complaining." He pulls you against him, pressing a kiss to your temple. "It was the hottest thing I've ever experienced, seriously. Every sound you made just made me want you more."
You're quiet for a moment, tracing patterns on his chest.
"We should do this again," you murmur.
He snorts. "Give me ten minutes and we will."
"That's not what I—" You swat at his chest. "I meant—this. Us, you know… not pretending to hate each other's asses anymore."
His expression softens.
He tilts your chin up, making you meet his eyes.
"I don't want to pretend anymore either. I haven't wanted to for a long time."
"You could have said something."
"So could you."
Fair point.
He rolls onto his side, facing you, one hand propping up his head.
"I have a confession." His voice is lighter now, teasing. "When you said you wanted to 'do this again'—I was hoping you meant right now. I'm not done with you yet."
"Already? Most men need recovery time."
"I'm not most men." He grins, and there's something predatory in it. "And you haven't seen everything I want to do to you yet."
You raise an eyebrow. "Such as?"
"Ride me."
The command makes heat pool in your stomach again, despite your exhaustion.
"You want me on top?"
"I want to watch you. Want to see your face when you take what you need from me. Want to see how pretty you look bouncing on my dick."
"Wow, you’re so eloquent… you have a way with words."
"I have a lot of things." His hand slides down your side, gripping your hip. "And I plan to show you all of them before this night is over."
True to his word, he's hard again within minutes, helped along by your hand wrapping around him, stroking him to fullness while he groans and bit your shoulder.
"Get up here," he demands, pulling you on top of him. "Straddle me. Face me."
You position yourself over him, sinking down slowly.
The angle is different, deeper in some ways, shallower in others, and you have control for the first time in your whole life.
"Take what you want," he says, hands settling on your thighs. "Use me."
You start to move, experimenting with different rhythms and angles.
His eyes never leave your face, watching every expression, every flicker of pleasure.
"That's it. Just like that." His thumbs stroke over your hip bones. "You look so fucking good like this. Taking what you need. Using me for your pleasure."
"You feel—" You break off with a moan as you find the right angle. "So good, so, so, so fucking good. You fill me up so perfectly."
"Made for me." His hands slide up to cup your breasts, thumbs brushing over your nipples. "This pussy was made for my cock. We fit together perfectly like jigsaw puzzles.”
You're getting loud again, moans filling the room as you ride him faster.
He groans beneath you, hips lifting to meet each of your movements.
"That's it, baby. Ride me. Take what you need." He pinches your nipples, and you cry out. "You're so sexy when you're loud. I love hearing how good I make you feel."
"Jay, I'm—"
"Uh-uh, wait for me, gorgeous. I want to come with you this time."
You slow down, trying to hold back, and he growls his approval.
"Good girl. So good for me. You listen so well."
He sits up suddenly, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you flush against his chest.
The new angle presses your clit against his pelvis with every movement, and you keen at the sensation.
"I want to feel you fall apart around me while I come inside you." His voice is rough against your ear. "Can you do that for me? Can you come with me?"
"Yes—yes—please—"
"Good. Now."
He thrusts up into you hard, and you both shatter at the same time.
You scream his name as pleasure crashes through you, feeling him pulse inside you, filling you up again.
He groans against your neck, teeth grazing your shoulder, hands tight enough on your hips to bruise.
When it's over, you collapse against his chest, completely spent.
"Round three in five minutes," he murmurs against your hair.
You laugh—weak and exhausted but genuine. "You're going to kill me."
"What a way to go."
But he's not joking.
True to his word, he's hard again within minutes, his stamina is inhuman, and you're beginning to wonder if you've created a monster.
What kind of shit has this guy been pulling off in the gym to achieve so much?
"Turn around," he says, hands guiding your hips. "I want you facing the other way. I want to watch that pretty ass bounce on my cock."
You hesitate. "You want—"
"Now." His voice leaves no room for argument. "I want to see you from behind while you ride me. I want to watch my cock disappear inside you."
Heat floods through you at his words.
You've never been particularly adventurous in bed before, mostly because you've never had a partner who made you want to be.
But Jay is looking at you like you're a feast he's been starved for, and you find yourself turning around, positioning yourself over him with your back to his chest.
"That's it." His hands smooth over your ass, kneading the flesh. "God, look at you. So eager. So desperate for my cock."
You sink down onto him slowly, and the new angle makes you gasp.
He fills you differently like this, deeper in some ways, the pressure concentrated against your front wall.
"Fuck—you feel even bigger like this—"
"I am bigger." He grips your hips, helping you find a rhythm. "And you're going to take all of me. Every. Single. Inch."
You start to move, lifting yourself up and sliding back down.
The sensation is overwhelming, the way he stretches you, the way his hands feel on your ass, the knowledge that he's watching himself disappear inside you.
"That's it. Ride me. Show me how much you want it."
"I do—I want it—want you—"
"Then take it harder. Faster. Fuck yourself on my cock like you mean it."
You obey, moving faster, grinding down with each stroke.
You're loud again, moans and gasps and desperate little cries that fill the room.
True to form, the louder you get, the more responsive he becomes.
"Yes—yes—oh god—right there—"
"Right there?" He thrusts up to meet you, hitting that spot perfectly. "Like this? You want me to keep hitting that spot while you scream for me?"
"Yes! Please—don't stop—harder—"
"Harder?" His grip tightens on your hips, and he starts fucking up into you with purpose. "You want me to ruin this pussy? Make it so no one else will ever feel right inside you?"
You're screaming now, completely beyond controlling the sounds coming out of your mouth.
Every thrust punches another cry from your throat, and you can hear how wet you are, the obscene sounds of your bodies meeting echoing through the room.
"Jay—Jay—I'm—oh fuck—I'm going to—"
"Not yet." He stills your hips, and you whimper. "You don't come until I say. You understand? You hold it."
"I can't—it's too much—please—"
"You can. And you will." He starts moving again, slower this time, torturously slow. "I want to feel you clench around me when I tell you to come. I want you begging for it."
"Please—please, fuck, just let me—"
"Tell me you're mine first."
"I'm yours—I'm yours—only yours—"
"Say it louder."
"I’m yours! Jay, I'm yours—please—please let me come—"
"Good girl. Now come for me. Come all over my cock."
The orgasm crashes through you like a tsunami.
You scream, actually scream, back arching, body shaking as wave after wave of pleasure tears through you.
He moans beneath you, and you feel him pulsing inside, filling you up again as he follows you over the edge.
You collapse forward, barely catching yourself on your hands, breathing ragged and uneven.
He's still inside you, still half-hard, and when he shifts, you whimper from the oversensitivity.
"One more," he growls. "I know you have one more in you."
"Jay, I literally cannot—I can't feel my legs—I… what the fuck are you even made out of?"
"I'll do the work then." He maneuvers you onto your stomach, pulling your hips up so your ass is in the air. "You just lie there and take it. Let me use you."
"Use me?"
"Did I stutter?" He runs a hand down your spine, making you shiver. "I've been fantasizing about you for months. Years, maybe. And now that I have you, I'm going to take everything you'll give me."
He enters you from behind again, this time with your face pressed into the mattress, your hips propped up on a pillow.
The position is sinful, animalistic, and you feel so deliciously full.
"This is my favorite position," he admits, voice strained. "Having you like this. Face down, ass up. Unable to do anything but take what I give you."
"Then give it to me." Your voice is muffled by the sheets. "Give me everything."
He starts moving, slow, deep strokes that make your toes curl.
The sounds you're making are embarrassing now, whimpers and moans and desperate little cries that you can't control.
"You're so loud tonight." He groans, thrusting deeper. "I love it. I love hearing how good I make you feel. The woman who barely speaks at dinner being reduced to this. Screaming my name. Begging for my cock."
"More—please—more—"
"More?" He snaps his hips forward, and you yelp. "Like this? You want me to fuck you harder?"
"Yes! Harder—faster—please—"
He obeys.
His pace increases, and you're being fucked into the mattress so hard the headboard is hitting the wall.
Each thrust is punctuated by a slap of skin against skin and a desperate sound from your throat.
"This what you wanted?" He grunts. "Wanted me to use this pretty pussy? Wanted to be ruined?"
"Yes—yes—ruin me—please—"
"You're close again, aren't you? I can feel you tightening around me. You're going to come on my cock again like a good girl."
"I can't—I've already—"
"You can. You will. And you're going to scream my name when you do."
His hand snakes around to your front, fingers finding your clit, and you sob at the dual sensation.
He's thrusting into you and rubbing circles on your most sensitive spot, and it's too much, it's everything.
"Come for me. Now."
Your final orgasm rips through you with an intensity that makes your vision go white.
You scream his name, scream it like a prayer, like a plea, like the only word you know, and you feel him follow you over the edge with a guttural groan.
He collapses on top of you, both of you shaking, sweat-slicked and thoroughly spent.
For a long moment, there's nothing but the sound of your ragged breathing and the pounding of your hearts.
Later, much later, you're both tangled in silk sheets, bodies exhausted and satisfied.
You've lost count of how many times he's made you come, how many positions he's bent you into, how many filthy things he's whispered in your ear.
"You know," you say, voice hoarse from screaming, "I always thought you were the composed, controlled type."
He chuckles, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. "I was. Until you."
"Me? I didn't do anything."
"You exist." His arm tightens around your waist. "You walk around this apartment looking like that. You cook meals in those tiny shorts. You bite your lip when you're concentrating. You exist, and it drives me insane."
You're quiet for a moment, processing this.
"I've been pretending too," you admit softly. "Pretending I didn't notice you. Pretending the arrangement didn't feel like anything."
"And now?"
"Now I don't want to pretend anymore."
He smiles against your skin, genuine and warm.
"Good, I have no intention of letting you go."
"Possessive."
"You love it."
You consider protesting, but then again, he's not wrong.
"Maybe a little."
"Good answer." He shifts, pulling you closer. "Sleep now. I have plans for you in the morning."
"More? What the fuck?"
"Many, many more."
You drift off with his arm around your waist and his breath warm against your shoulder, thinking maybe the arrangement was always going to lead here.
Maybe there was never a version of this story where you remained indifferent to each other.
bf!jay punishing virgin!reader by making you ride him! drabble , wc: 257 words, 1456 characters, inexperienced!reader, kind of mean dom!jay, porn-no-plot.. bigdih!jay, daddy kink, idk what else sowwy, REQUESTS ARE OPEN!! (pls i need requests). this drabble is bad but it ok
“h-how—ahh-“ you gasp, you were at least trying to sit on jay’s thick cock — “nghhh.. i-i can’t-!” you whine, leaning back on your arms, “sure you can, babydoll,” jay spoke slowly “you were acting like a big girl in the store, but now you’re just a little baby?” he coos.
“turns out you’re not a big girl..” he chuckles, running his hand up and down your thigh, gently squeezing your tit with the other one. “you need daddy’s help, eh?” jay speaks up, by now your brain is almost mush, you just wanted — no, needed a release.
“y-yeah-yes, yes i need daddy’s help!” you squeak, now rubbing up down up down on jays cock. “sshit..” he groans, grabbing at your hips, and slowly pushing your soaking hole down on his thick length.
“ah—ahhh! j-jay-! ‘s too much!” you shake, scratching at his thighs, “mhm.. you can take it tho, right baby?” he breathes out while chewing on his lower lip, “fffuckk—squeezing me just right, hm?” jay stifled a moan as you took him completely.
“you can do it, cmonnn move your hips angel..” he groaned, now biting on his bottom lip, “c-can’t-i-it’s waytoomuch!!” you squeal, your eyes squeezing close. “noonoo, none of that.. princess, look at me, yeah?” jay laughs. you’re doing your best trying not to cum just by his intrusion.
you scratch at his arms, shaking violently as you cum around his cock — a slutty moan ripping from your throat, which made jay just chuckle in amusement, gently holding your hand.
“awww, you came from this only? maybe you’ll have a proper orgasm if you behaved..” jay teased, bringing your hand to his lips. “‘msorryyy..” you whine out, already sleepy…
Warnings: Explicit sexual content, MINORS DNI!, rough sex, mating press, creampie, unprotected sex (dont be dumb), sugar daddy/sugar baby relationship, possessive behavior, power imbalance, strong language, praise kink, light degradation, marking, overstimulation.
The city lights blurred past the tinted windows of Jay’s sleek black Maybach as it glided through Seoul’s nighttime streets. You shifted against the buttery leather seat, the shopping bags at your feet rustling softly—Dior, Chanel, Cartier. Another night, another fortune spent on you.
Jay’s hand rested possessively on your thigh, fingers tracing lazy circles over the expensive silk dress he’d bought you an hour ago. “You look good in that color,” he murmured, voice low and smooth like aged whiskey. “But I can’t wait to see it on the floor.”
Your breath hitched. This was the arrangement you’d fallen into three months ago: Jay Park, wealthy heir and successful businessman, took care of you completely. Designer clothes, a luxury apartment in the heart of the city, and a black card with no limit. In return, you were his—whenever he wanted, however he wanted.
The car stopped at his private penthouse. Jay didn’t wait for the driver; he opened the door himself and offered his hand like a perfect gentleman. But the moment the elevator doors closed behind you two, the gentleman disappeared.
He pushed you against the mirrored wall, mouth crashing onto yours. The kiss was hungry, demanding. His tongue slid against yours while his hand slipped under your dress, fingers brushing the lace panties he’d chosen earlier.
“Jay…” you gasped as he pressed a thigh between your legs.
“Been thinking about this all day,” he growled against your neck, teeth grazing your pulse point. “Imagining how wet you’d be by the time I got my hands on you.”
The elevator dinged. He lifted you effortlessly, your legs wrapping around his waist as he carried you inside. The penthouse was all floor-to-ceiling windows, soft lighting, and minimalist luxury. He didn’t bother with the bedroom. Instead, he set you down on the wide marble island in the kitchen, the cool stone making you shiver.
“Spread your legs for me, baby.”
You obeyed, heart racing. Jay stepped back, eyes dark as he drank you in—dress hiked up, hair messy from his hands, lips swollen. He shrugged off his tailored black jacket, unbuttoned the top of his crisp white shirt, revealing the sharp collarbones and smooth chest you loved marking.
He dropped to his knees.
“Fuck, Jay—” Your hands flew to his hair as he pushed your panties aside and dragged his tongue up your slit in one slow, filthy stroke. He groaned at your taste, like he’d been starving for it. Two long fingers pushed inside you without warning, curling perfectly against that spot that made your thighs shake.
“Look at you,” he murmured against your clit, sucking lightly before flicking his tongue faster. “Soaking my fingers already. My pretty little sugar baby gets wet just from shopping, huh?”
You moaned, hips rolling against his face. He ate you out like a man possessed—messy, eager, completely focused on your pleasure. The wet sounds echoed obscenely in the open space. When he added a third finger and sucked hard on your clit, you came with a sharp cry, thighs clamping around his head.
Jay rose, wiping his glistening mouth with the back of his hand. That cocky smirk made your stomach flip.
“Good girl. But I’m not done with you.”
He pulled you off the counter and turned you around, bending you over it. The sound of his belt buckle sent a fresh wave of heat through you. You heard the zipper, then felt the thick head of his cock rubbing between your folds, teasing your entrance.
“Tell me what you want,” he said, voice rough. One hand gripped your hip, the other fisted your hair gently but firmly.
“You,” you breathed. “Please, Jay. Fuck me.”
He thrust in deep in one smooth stroke, stretching you open. A broken moan left your lips. He was big—thick and long enough to make you feel deliciously full every single time. He started moving, hips snapping against your ass with controlled power.
“Shit, you’re so tight,” he groaned, watching where he disappeared inside you. “Taking my cock so well. This pussy was made for me.”
The slap of skin on skin filled the penthouse. He reached around to rub your clit, driving you toward another orgasm while pounding into you harder. Your breasts pressed against the cool marble, nipples hard. Every thrust pushed you forward, making you grip the edge of the counter.
“Jay—ah—too deep—”
“You can take it,” he growled, leaning over you so his chest pressed to your back. His lips brushed your ear. “You’ll take everything I give you tonight. Gonna fill you up until you’re dripping.”
You came again, clenching around him so hard he cursed. Jay pulled out suddenly, making you whine at the emptiness. He spun you around, lifted you back onto the island, and pushed back inside in one smooth thrust.
“Want to see your face when I cum,” he said, forehead pressed to yours.
His pace turned punishing for a few minutes before he slowed, eyes gleaming with a new idea. He grabbed your thighs and pushed them up, folding you neatly in half until your knees pressed against your chest. The mating press position left you completely exposed and helpless beneath him.
“Oh my god—” you gasped at the new angle. He sank even deeper, the head of his cock pressing right against your most sensitive spot with every thrust.
Jay groaned, the sound low and primal. “Fuck, look at you. Folded so nicely for me.” He braced his hands on either side of your head, muscles flexing as he drove down into you with long, powerful strokes. The position made everything tighter, deeper, more intense. Every thrust made your breasts bounce and forced broken moans from your throat.
“Jay—too much—ahh!” you cried, nails digging into his shoulders.
“You can take it,” he panted, sweat glistening on his forehead. “Gonna fuck you so deep you’ll feel me for days.” His hips snapped harder, the sound of skin slapping wetly against skin growing louder. He leaned down, folding you even more as he captured your lips in a messy kiss.
The pressure built fast. With your legs pinned and his cock hitting that perfect spot relentlessly, your orgasm crashed over you violently. You clenched around him, vision whitening as you came hard.
“That’s it, baby. Squeeze my cock,” Jay growled. A few more deep, brutal thrusts and he buried himself to the hilt, groaning your name as he came. You felt every thick pulse as he filled you up, hot and endless.
He stayed inside you for a long moment, both of you catching your breath. Slowly, he lowered your legs, but kept them wrapped around his waist as he kissed you softly.
“Still with me?” he asked, voice gentler now.
You nodded, dazed and satisfied. Jay eventually pulled out, watching with dark satisfaction as his release trickled down your thigh. He scooped you up and carried you to the luxurious bathroom. The massive shower turned on with a touch, warm water cascading over both of you as he stripped the rest of his clothes.
Under the spray, he was careful. He washed your body with gentle hands, massaging shampoo into your hair.
“You okay?” he asked, pressing a kiss to your temple.
“More than okay,” you whispered.
After drying you off, he carried you to his king-sized bed and pulled you against his chest. The city sparkled beyond the windows. Jay reached into the nightstand and pulled out a small velvet box.
“Open it.”
Inside was a delicate gold necklace with a diamond J pendant.
“For you,” he said, clasping it around your neck. His fingers traced the J resting between your breasts. “So everyone knows who you belong to.”
You touched the necklace, warmth blooming in your chest. “Thank you, Jay.
”He smirked, but his eyes were soft. “Don’t thank me yet. The night’s still young.”
He rolled you beneath him again, lips trailing down your neck. His hand slid between your legs, fingers playing with the mess he’d left earlier. “Still so full of me,” he murmured proudly. “Good. I like knowing you’re walking around with my cum inside you.”
You moaned softly as he pushed two fingers back inside, slow and lazy. When he finally replaced them with his cock again, it was deep and unhurried. He held eye contact the whole time, one hand laced with yours.
“Mine,” he breathed between thrusts. “All fucking mine.”
You came whispering his name, and he followed soon after, spilling into you once more.
Later, wrapped in his silk robe and eating expensive takeout in bed, Jay watched you with that signature half-smile.
“You know this isn’t just about the money, right?” he said, feeding you a piece of wagyu. “I like having you here. Spoiling you. Fucking you. All of it.”
You leaned in and kissed him. “I know.”
He pulled you into his lap, the robe falling open. “Ride me this time,” he commanded softly, hands gripping your ass. “Want to watch my pretty sugar baby take what she needs.”
You sank down onto him slowly, moaning at the stretch. Jay’s head fell back, eyes half-lidded in pleasure as you began to move. His hands guided your hips, occasionally sliding up to play with your breasts or tug gently at the diamond J around your neck.
The pace quickened until you both came again, collapsing together in a satisfied tangle of limbs.
Jay kissed the top of your head. “Stay the night. Stay every night.”
You smiled against his skin. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Summary: A drunken one night stand went wrong when news of the darling socialite was seen leaving the penthouse of CEO Park Jongseong, one of the most sought bachelors in Korea. In order to save face and reputation, a fake dating contract of six months was proposed.
The problem? Turns out you and Jay were ex-lovers — a secret relationship that ended up in a bad light and three years after not seeing each other, you two ended up in the headline of the tabloids and gossip articles. Fake it 'til you make it, they say, and it doesn't help that your ex-boyfriend is great with the act, blurring the lines between repressed feelings and acting like everything's fine between the two of you.
Third installment of Big reputations series.
✰ Song inspirations: Call it what you want by Taylor swift, Radio by Lana del rey, Love me like you do by Ellie goulding
✰ Word count: 25k
✰ Tags: CEO au, ex-lovers, fake dating, aged-up characters (both of them are 28), miscommunication? No, the other party doesn’t want to communicate, repressed feelings, both of them are bad with their feelings, not-so-slow burn!!! yearning!!! They’re kinda toxic ngl, rich people activities lmaooo, fluff and angst!!! smut, reader is kinda a spoiled brat (and is actually just a heartbroken girl, let her live), jay is a mix of green and red flag, heeseung is a menace, kys jokes, mentions of kpop idols (ft. jangkku as a couple.) NOT PROOFREAD.
✰ CW: plot with porn ofc. Soft vanilla sex that’s mwa, p in v sex, unprotected sex (pls don’t), makeup sex, cumming inside, they’re just very tender and in love. I am not sorry at all, oral (f receiving), body worship, praise, soft aftercare, crying after sex.
✰ Asul's note: this was so harddddddd, why is fake dating so harddddd!!! Anyways, I wrote this at 2 am so sue me if its messy. But think of this as an advance christmas gift ig?? Also, I only have a little knowledge about formula one, sue jay for influencing me in this one. I also eyeballed the places mentioned, sorry once again. I think this is the most romantic smut I have ever wrote lmaoo, i live for makeup sex.
Enjoy this fic! sending loves and an advance merry christmas to everyone! <3
Sunlight peeked through the black curtains of the bedroom, giving light through the dimmed, masculine room. It landed on your face directly, earning a groan from you as you turned your body away from the light. The silence was relaxing, save it for the soft and comfortable bed that you’re on —
That’s when it sank into you. Opening your eyes slowly, you come face to face to the sturdy back beside you. Your eyes widened and you freezed on your position, slowly, you looked into your body and that’s when you realized that you’re left with nothing but your panties.
Embarrassment washed over you. You couldn’t believe that you just had a one-night stand — a drunken one to be exact! You’re not even the type to do casual sex! You groaned internally before you felt him moved beside you, completely startling you.
But he didn’t wake up, he just fixed his position. So you quietly moved your way out of the bed, careful not to wake him up, and you were thanking the gods that he’s a heavy sleeper.
Your hangover’s still had your head throbbing, last night’s drinks hitting you like a baseball bat which made you wince at every movement. You managed to find your clothes scattered around the place and shame was all you felt as you picked it one by one.
You found your phone inside your sling bag on the floor, picking it up to see the missed calls and texts from your brother. You cursed internally, preparing from his lecture as you called him back.
“Where the fuck are you!?” Heeseung’s angry tone welcomed you, making you wince as you brushed your messy, bed hair.
“I don’t know but can you pick me up please please,” you plead, whispering as you tiptoe your way out of the bedroom.
“Mama’s worried sick! What the fuck y/n —”
“Can you save all your naggings when you see me, I’ll send my location and fucking pick me up!” you whisper-shouted, cutting off the call and sending your location to your brother.
Heeseung 😛: Fifteen minutes. Stay put and I’ll call you if I’m outside.
8:43 AM
You let out a deep sigh before you started walking away from the long hallway. As you reached the living room of his place, your eyes went wide at the sight of the living room. It was huge and luxurious, with designer furniture and rare figurines on display. You also noticed a few formula one merchandise which made you curious about the guy you slept with.
Unfortunately, there’s not a single picture of him on display inside the area, so you quickly brushed it off, since it was just a drunken one night stand, he’d forget about it just like what you’re planning to do.
You found the exit of the place, the hallways were exquisite and clean, and it just sinked into you that you ended up in someone’s penthouse. Oh well. You thought. At least he’s some snobbish rich guy. Your drunk self still has taste.
As you rode the elevator down, that’s when questions started running through your head, adding more headache for you.
Where are you? Who’s the guy sleeping on the bed? How did this happen? It’s pretty obvious that you were black-out dead last night and was convinced that something happened but what led you to sleeping with him?
You tried to recall last night’s events but the only thing you remembered was you buying another bottle of tequila and after that, everything was a blur. You don’t even know where he popped into the night.
Was the sex even good!? You mentally groaned when you felt your phone vibrate. Picking it up to see that your brother’s almost near.
The lobby of the building had a few people on it when you arrived. Observing their proud faces and designer clothes, it is safe to assume that you ended up at a high-end sky building somewhere in the city. The front-desk agent gave you a small smile and nod which you reciprocated awkwardly before you exit the lobby.
You waited for a few minutes before you noticed the white ford mustang and familiar car plate of your brother’s, making you sigh in relief.
You smiled as you opened the door of the passenger seat, ignoring your brother’s stabbing glare as you put on the seatbelt.
“Go on, nag all you want but a little disclaimer, I have a hangover so all your words will just fly away from my mind,” you stated as you rested your head by the window.
“You’re so reckless y/n,” Heeseung started as he drove away from the building.
“I am careful,” you replied, knowing that you’re also wrong.
Heeseung chuckled sarcastically, “careful? Right, because if you’re being careful you would’ve ended up going home last night and not to some random stranger’s place.”
“Hey! At least you found me at some high-end building and not some cheap motel, alive and breathing if I may add.” you justified.
“Not my point but whatever,” Heeseung sighed, accepting defeat. “Just stay out of trouble, I know that you love to party but tone it down please, you still have a reputation to hold.”
“Yeah, gonna keep the family name clean,” you mocked.
“I’m serious.” he warned and that made you shut up.
You’re one of the most-loved socialites in your country. The darling of the crowd, a head-turner at every formal event or dinner you attend. The sweet, youngest daughter of the Lee family — one of the well-known names in South Korea.
You’re the life of the party. Always present at every party, fashion weeks, and formal events with confidence. Free days come in the form of luxury shopping and traveling around the world. Everyone may look at you as the young and spoiled, socialite of your family, but you didn’t care about it because honestly? It’s true though.
Your family lets you do whatever you want. Whether it involves your family’s business or just spending their money on luxurious items, you’re living the life. You don’t have a permanent job but because of your name and influence, you were able to earn money independently by collaborating with brands and luxurious houses.
Your parents didn’t force you to work for the family business since your older brother had already taken over the company. They told you that you’re free to do what you want as long as you don’t ruin the family’s name.
You’re careful. You were always careful about your image. It leaves you anxious even though you’re used to the spotlight. As much as you had the freedom, there are still consequences whenever you made irrational decisions, hence why despite shrugging casually to your brother’s lecture, you were nervous deep inside.
You’re not the type to do one night stands and all that casual sex and situationships. You hated those kinds of things. Love is a sentimental thing for you. That’s why you were nervous deep inside. You ended up at a stranger’s house, and based from his fucking huge penthouse, he’s not just any rich man — he probably had a reputable name in your country.
You’re curious about him. It left you pondering about his identity, but at the same time, you were silently praying that last night wouldn't blow up in a huge portion.
-
You don’t know why your brother was eager for you to go to his office on a Tuesday afternoon.
You almost ignored his chat, but when it ended with a note of cutting off your credit card, you had no choice but to visit him.
As you entered the office, you weren’t even able to greet him because he looked at you mad, like you did something unforgivable
“Look at what you have done,” he said with an angry tone. Heeseung took heavy strides before he flashed his phone screen in front of you.
Lee Y/n and Park Jongseong caught leaving Royalty together — is it a new romance brewing? Or just a night of happiness?
You freezed.
No way. You thought. No fucking way, there’s no fucking way —
You grabbed his phone and scrolled through the article. Pictures of you being carried outside the club, by the lobby of the building, and when you were leaving the building. Your eyes widened. You couldn’t believe that they followed you and even waited for you outside the building. It was obvious that it’s you. They didn’t even attempt to hide your face! God, you couldn’t believe that you were smiling ear to ear in the first photo — like you were madly, deeply with the man who was carrying you.
Park Jongseong.
His name still gives chills to your body, and just seeing his face, which was smiling too, had your heart beating. You don’t know why your heart started acting like that. Was it out of nervousness? Pain? Anxiety? You were confused and stunned at the same time.
Out of all the men in this world, it has to be Park fucking Jongseong. Your secret ex-boyfriend. Your whirlwind semester romance. Your best and worst mistake. The guy that you gave your everything that the moment he left, you were completely nothing.
You wanted to curse him. Three years have passed and he’s still handsome as ever — more handsome than ever. He got rid of his rebellious silver-like blonde hair and ear piercings, and grungy, rockstar outfits and had it replaced with the more sophisticated and clean get-up, living up to the reputation of the old money Parks.
Three years passed and he’s now back in South Korea. He’s here and that thought made you anxious.
He’s here. In South Korea. Breathing the same air as you — you just felt your world ended.
“I told you to be careful,” Heeseung warned, snapping you away from your thoughts.
“I was being careful! I didn’t know that there were paparazzis there! Why would they be invested to get a scoop from me!?” you questioned.
“You were out partying with other socialites. Royalty is a high-end club — damn it y/n! It’s not only you who they wanted a scoop from, it’s also them and Jongseong — do you even know him?”
Of course. Of course you do. You know him damn well. You know what his cologne combination was and every name of his guitar collection. You know that he’s allergic to flowers, that's why not once did you receive a bouquet from him when the two of you were together. You knew Park Jongseong too well, but unfortunately, you couldn’t say it out loud to your strict brother.
“What’s with him anyway,” you crossed your arms instead. The last time you’ve heard from Jay was three years ago, when the two of you had a fight because he’s leaving for America.
You wanted him to stay, he wanted to go to America. He called you selfish and spoiled, you called him heartless, and perhaps, both of it were true because you two called it off that same night. Jay moved to America while you returned to South Korea, spending more than you used to in hopes that it’ll ease your broken heart.
“His name is currently on-trend along with his twin brother, Park Sunghoon, formula one driver for Ferrari. Both of them are promising bachelors here. Charismatic and old money rich, Jongseong’s currently the CEO of Park Land and Leisures. And you? The sweet and darling socialite of Northern Stars Inc., just happened to have slept with him. You two are a fucking scandal at the moment,” Heeseung explained and you only rolled your eyes.
“It’s not like he’s married, oh my god Heeseung, he’s single! And so am I! What’s wrong with what we did?” you pointed out.
“People are still conservative y/n, one night stands and things like that are still scandalous, mom and dad are fucking furious at the moment,” he rebutted and your eyes widened.
“They knew!?”
“Of course y/n, they knew, your name’s all over the headlines and newspapers!” Heeseung argued before heaving out a sigh, eyes still leaving heavy glares on you. “That’s why I am proposing something.”
Your forehead creased, “what do you mean?”
A knock on the door interrupted your conversation, you turned around and from the glass door, you froze when you saw who it was.
It felt like a movie — a horror movie to be exact. It was like seeing a ghost, the ghost of your past to be exact. You became quiet, heart beating rapidly that it’ll burst out of your chest any moment now. With your throat turned dry and cold sweat forming on your skin, you were nailed from where you were standing as you watched Jay walk into the office.
He still looks as good as ever. Much sophisticated and clean, far from his rebellious and roughed image back then. You watched as he passed by you — completely ignoring you as he approached Heeseung with a smile and firm handshake while your eyes remained at him.
“Thanks for coming,” Heeseung greeted, making you snap out of your daze.
Jay chuckled, “no worries, we need to clean some rumors right?”
His eyes landed on you. A frown on your face as you crossed your arms.
“Nice meeting you again y/n,” Jay greeted and you scoffed at his words.
Heeseung’s forehead creased, “you guys know each other?”
“No!?” you shouted defensively, panic starting to get into you. Heeseung raised an eyebrow before shaking his head out of disappointment.
“I guess you were really too drunk to remember that night,” Jay taunted and you scoffed at his words. You swear to God, he was testing you.
“Whatever, why are you even here?”
“Because of the rumor, of course,” Jay explained casually. “It’s going to be hard to convince the public that what happened that night was nothing, especially when they captured us in different locations. They even followed us in our building.”
“There’s nothing to worry about that, my family knows how to handle bad pr,” you rebutted.
“Good for you, but I also have a reputation to hold on,” he stated.
You raised an eyebrow, “Why? Afraid to lose your hottest bachelor image, Mr. Park?”
“You’re right, Ms. Lee, I don’t want the public to see me as someone who’s a playboy of sort, casual shits like this aren’t my things.” Jay smirked casually.
You only rolled your eyes at his answer. He even had the audacity to taunt you? You swear if only Heeseung wasn’t present in this room, you would’ve kicked his balls out of rage.
“That’s why I’m here to resolve your problem,” Heeseung butted in. “Think of it as a punishment for your recklessness too y/n.”
You chuckled in disbelief, “a fucking punishment? What am I, sixteen?”
“The proposal is simple. We convince the public that you two are currently seeing each other on good terms, date publicly and act the deal, then break up due to busy schedules.” Heeseung explained, ignoring your words and how your face distorted into confusion.
“You’re fucking kidding me.” You cursed.
“When do I joke about this kind of thing y/n? I told you to be careful, and these are the consequences of your reckless actions, so owe up to it,” Heeseung authoritatively stated, making you flinch at his tone.
It really was a fucking punishment for you. What do you mean you’re going to fake date your ex-boyfriend for the sake of the publicity? It was like the devil had possessed your brother that he resorted to that idea.
“How long?” Jay asked.
“Six months.” Heeseung answered quickly.
Six months? What a fucking joke — it’s the same length you and Jay dated. You don’t know if they’re playing tricks with you but one thing is that you aren’t pleased with the situation.
“What if I don’t want to?” you asked.
Heeseung glared, “and why the fuck not?”
“I don’t like him.” you pointed out Jay who only smirked at your comment.
“Why? You basically met him last Saturday, you two are barely strangers,” Heeseung pointed out. “Unless you two met prior to this one.”
You became quiet. You only looked away as you heard Jay’s soft chuckle was all you heard — making you even more irritated.
“It’s just six months,” Jay casually commented. “It’s not like we’re going to see each other everyday, Ms. Lee, we can set dates and public events where we’ll go together. We can also set boundaries too, since we’re just faking it after all.”
His words hurt you. You don’t know if the two of them were setting you up or everything about this was just a mere coincidence. But knowing Heeseung, if he knew your past with Jay, he would’ve confronted him about it. And yet, the two of them were seemingly civil, which leaves you completely hopeless knowing that as much as you oppose the idea, your brother doesn’t change his mind that easily.
One thing for sure was that you had pushed your brother’s patience this time. He could’ve brushed it off. Casually deny the rumor or let it die down but he chose this weird publicity stunt just to tame your attitude. You groaned internally. In the end, you’re still at fault too.
“I don’t have a choice in this one, right?” you crossed your arms, as a defeated look formed on your face.
“Mom and dad already approved this proposal,” Heeseung shared. “For once they hope that you’d tame your lifestyle now that you’re linked to Jongseong.”
“Just like how they threw me in Barcelona for that fucking fall semester,” you muttered under your breath, yet loud enough for your brother to hear.
“Just read the damn contract y/n, and hurry up, I have a meeting in an hour,” Heeseung grabbed the envelope from his desk and handed you a copy which you accepted in defeat.
You began reading the contract. It has a lot of terms and conditions that you skimmed through but basically, you and Jay are going to pretend to be dating for six months. Attending events together are a must unless the other party’s on an important schedule. There were no rules of skinships between the two of you, hugs and kisses are a must since it convinces the public that you two are real. Dates aren’t required but it’ll be good publicity for your relationship.
This also meant that you’re not allowed to date anyone and so does Jay. You don’t know why but reading it assured you somehow. It meant that for the next six months, the only girl Jay will be seeing is you and no one else. That’s a small win for you for sure.
Jay said earlier that you two didn’t need to meet everyday. Which is good for you. You just have to keep yourself busy for the next six months — maybe travel around the world or join a cruise ship, if it means avoiding Jay at all cost.
The idea was bright in your mind. You nodded at yourself before you placed down the contract at the coffee table.
“Fine, give me a pen, I’ll sign it,” you announced, making the two men look at you.
“That was fast,” Heeseung comments before going to his desk to grab a pen.
“It’s just six months, I think I can manage,” you shrugged, completely signing the contract. You placed down the pen and glanced at Jay with a taunting smirk. “Let’s just say that we keep our relationship private, so that means we don’t need to meet in public and date outside. Let’s just wait for six months to pass by and then call it off, sounds good right?”
“Y/n, wait —”
“Now, if you excuse me, I have a spa treatment with my girls, so goodbye to the two of you,” you gave them a teasing flying kiss before you walked out of Heeseung’s office, completely ignoring him calling you out.
You could only laugh mischievously as you skipped your way towards the elevator. As you reached the area, you pressed down the button and while waiting, a hand grabbed your arms suddenly, completely startling you.
“What the fuck — let me go!” you snapped your arms away from Jay who only looked at you angrily.
“We’re not done yet y/n,” he stated, making you raise an eyebrow.
“That’s not what you said to me three years ago,” you smiled.
But instead of getting irritated, Jay chuckled in disbelief, “oh my god, you’re still not over that, am I right?”
Your forehead creased, “dream on Jay, why are you even here? I thought you’re living your life in America.”
“I have a company to take over with, which from what I recall, I informed you about that one, but someone thinks that I am staying in America for good.”
“Because you were.” you sassed.
“Oh my god, are we really going to dump our issues here? We could settle this down —”
“No Jay, I am not going to settle this down. We’re done and we’re through, we made that very fucking clear that night.” You breathed out, feeling your heart getting heavy as you said those words. “And don’t you think just because I signed the contract doesn’t mean I wanted to act according to it. I am not going to show up to you Jay. Just being near you makes me sick.”
The elevator door rang. You didn’t wait for his answer. You went your way inside the elevator, pushing the close button in hurry as the last thing you saw was Jay’s disappointed face.
-
When did your love story with Jay even start?
Fall in Barcelona. One semester at a prestigious international school that specializes in business and economics. It sounds so preppy and nice to hear but you attended it by force.
You were young. Living on your daddy’s credit card and older brother’s headache. Your mother enabled you and your grandparents loved their beautiful and only granddaughter. You get away with everything, well, almost.
It wasn’t a huge scandal that involved your name getting tainted and your company’s stocks going down. Your father was just sick of you partying and traveling around the world with no clear goal about your future. Sure, you have a degree in fashion merchandising, but the moment you got your diploma, you threw everything you’ve learned and just spent your life spoiled and loved.
Hence, your cards got declined and you were forced to pack your bags and move to a foreign country just to study again. It was a punishment, you insisted, but your parents justified that in case you’re needed in the company, you have the basic skills about how business works. What a lame excuse, you think.
Of course, you’re not going to waste your parent’s money by not attending the semester. You’re actually fine with it. At least it’s in a foreign country. You’re living alone in a decent-size dorm room inside the university, and somehow, taking a crash course about something you’re quite interested in would be preferable than living the routine of your wild, youthful life. You still benefited from it since it was something productive and you also wanted to prove to your parents that you still have directions in your life.
Jay was a classmate of yours. He sticks out like a sore thumb from the whole section. He looked like he’s the one whose parents forced him to attend the semester rather than you.
Jay looked like a mixture of a rebel emo and a rockstar. Wearing nothing but rugged and baggy streetwear clothes in the shades of black and gray, and nothing else. Even his accessories were silver along with his almost silver-like blonde hair that looked like it’s been bleached a hundred times to achieve the shade.
It was easy to say that he did catch your attention. But you’re not the type to make the first move, and particularly, he wasn’t your type at first. Perhaps it was just a small crush, a fleeting feeling inside your stomach because despite his intimidating image, Jay was one of the impressive students in your section.
It happened a month later. At a small gathering with your other classmates after class, you accepted it shyly, and unbeknownst to you, Jay was also there. The gathering was nice. At a restaurant nearby the school that’s known for its paella and wine. You conversed happily with some of them, and as an hour passed by, Jay had joined in naturally.
The conversation started small. You didn’t even notice that it was just the two of you talking to each other later on. The wine had hit off, and the two of you were laughing your hearts off. He felt familiar — Jay reminded you of home given that both of you are from South Korea. You didn’t even realise that you were homesick until you had a talk with Jay.
He walked you home, the conversation and laughter never stopped and somehow, fall felt warm compared to its weather. He bid you goodbye with a smile which you reciprocated.
As you reached your dorm room, the smile on your face never left. Your heart was beating rapidly and you felt like a teenage girl experiencing her first love.
Jay entered your life naturally. The two of you became friends after that night. The sense of having someone you could relate to was the comfort that you needed in Barcelona. You’ve learned so much about Jay — his passion for music, love for cooking, and traveling. He was also a family man, the oldest among the two sons of the Park family.
He has a twin brother. A total opposite of him who chose his dream of becoming a racer. Jay was left to take over the business even though he had a liking for producing music. You also learned that he took the semester program so that he doesn’t have to do an internship under his uncle in America. His parents agreed with his deal and as soon as the semester ends, just like you, he’ll go home to South Korea.
You don’t know when it started. That crush of yours became deeper and soon, you could hear your heart beating rapidly than it should. Your cheeks warming just being near Jay, and the slightest actions that he does — placing you on the safer side of the road, carrying your bag, and dropping you off to your dorm building after class, makes you wonder if there’s a deeper meaning to it. You couldn’t even look into his eyes anymore.
You tried to conceal your feelings. Afraid to ruin the friendship — only for Jay to ruin it first.
The confession came unexpectedly. Really unexpectedly. At his apartment room after dinner. The leftovers of takeouts were still on his dining table. You were laying on his bed while he’s seated on the huge bean bag that he insisted was his couch, strumming his guitar named Tongtongie as he hummed an unfamiliar song by Bon Jovi.
Then he stopped, stared at you for a while. The phrase, “I like you,” slipped out of his lips suddenly, your eyes widened and you almost fell off his bed out of shock. You hated him for catching you off-guard that night but you were happy because he has feelings for you — it was the easiest acceptance you ever did and the last thing you remembered was Jay’s blissful smile before he pulled you for a kiss.
That night ended passionately. Tangled in the sheets and warmth shared with each other. You two weren’t each other’s first, but it felt so special than your past experiences. When you woke up next to him, looking at him who’s still in his slumber, the only thing you could think of was how lucky you were — and perhaps, it was fate that brought you to Barcelona so that you could meet Jay.
Your whirlwind relationship with Jay started. Suddenly, everything felt so right and there’s nothing in this world that matters except you and Jay. You two were on your honeymoon phase during the duration of the semester. Always together, crashing into each other’s place, and traveling to other cities as dates. Fights rarely happened and you two felt like you two understood each other the most.
The two of you didn’t hide your relationship from your family not because they won’t accept it, but it just so happens that you two are in Barcelona, you didn’t feel the need to tell your family about it and so did Jay. You were focused on your relationship with Jay. The codependency was there and it may seem sickening for others to always see you together everyday, but for the two of you, the world would probably end if one of you aren’t with the other.
Months passed and your relationship with Jay became deeper. More stronger and intimate. Promises were made and the future seems to be bright for the two of you. There are talks of ‘what-ifs’ and future plans, and one of them was that when two of you returned to South Korea, you’d tell everyone your relationship with Jay, and so will he.
Soon, the fall semester ended. You stayed for another month just to travel around Europe with Jay. Enjoying your time together before you two return home. Everything felt so right for you. It was perfect — way too perfect that the news that came after hit you harder than a bullet straight to your heart.
Jay wasn’t going to return to South Korea. He’s going to America to work for his uncle. To work. Not just a temporary internship but work. A stable job with stable income. Something that he needs to do before taking over his parent’s company.
You were betrayed. Tears started to blur your sight as Jay casually told you the news. Destroying every plan and promises you two had. Your luggage was packed. Everything was settled. You were just about to wait for tomorrow to come for you to take your flight home, all excited and happy but Jay had to ruin it.
He insisted that your relationship could still work and his promises weren’t broken — just halted. You asked him when he will return to his home country. He couldn’t give you a definite answer and that was your cue.
You exploded and he was irritated. You two had a shouting contest, not one wanted to lower each other’s pride. It was messy, arguments became less logical and flaws started to be brought. In the end, you were a desperate mess as you begged him to stay with you. You were crying as you fell onto your knees and asked to stay with you.
Jay didn’t budge. He was mad at you. He couldn’t understand why you couldn’t understand that he was needed by his family? He’s doing this not only for his future, but your future together. He’s just going on a detour with his future — and you couldn’t understand that. He told you that not everything would go in your way just because you were spoiled growing up.
You slapped him right there. His left cheek burned and turned bright red, you called him every name you could think of like you didn’t love him for the past few months. Despite that, he didn’t say another thing about you. Jay just looked you dead in the eye and broke up with you. You didn’t fight for it, too tired and heartbroken that him calling it off didn’t hurt you anymore.
That was the last time you saw him. No goodbyes or closure. Jay left you there alone and devastated. The next day, you went home to your home country. Pale, depressed, and heartbroken. You acted like you were fine, but every time your family or relatives asked you about Barcelona, there was still a stinging pain in your heart. All you could think of was him.
You blocked him on every social media platform. Deleted every picture you had with him. Threw and burned every gift he has given to you, whether expensive or not — even the Cartier ring he brought you as a promise ring. You burned everything that’ll remind you of him — even the clothes you wore when you were in Barcelona. You did it in hopes that you’d get over him and heal your broken heart.
Three years had passed. You thought that you’ve moved on. You’re living your life now! You have a good reputation. Not a stable job but hey, at least your name has a price tag on it. You’re still a headache to your older brother but less tamer now. You didn’t date anyone around because of the trauma you had with Jay, you thought that it was better to keep yourself single for now.
Now, fate seems to have other plans. Three years of moving on and suddenly you’re now going to be stuck with him for the following six months. Life could be cruel sometimes.
A week has passed and you’re in your bedroom. After last week’s fiasco at Heeseung’s office. You shut yourself in your room. Ignoring all the invitations your friends invited you, cancelling your treatment appointments, and just spending in bed rotting as you scroll through your social media.
The dating article of you and Jay had been confirmed by both sides. It was said that the two of you were seeing each other for almost a month. You two met in Italy wherein you attended the Milan fashion week while Jay was at the F1 grand prix to support his brother. An acquaintance set you two up and you two hit off right away. Yeah right.
The two of you agreed to keep your relationship a secret at the moment since you two are at the courting stage. It was also said in the article that Jay picked you up at the club wherein the paparazzis had taken photos of you and let you stay at his place which shouldn’t be anything malicious given that the two of you are seeing each other. You wanted to laugh at their lame excuses, and yet, it was still believable since the public believed it anyway.
They also stated to give respect to your relationship and the two of you would prefer for it to be private, which made you smile. That’s right. You thought. Keep it private, so you won’t have to act along with Jay in public.
You closed your phone and went out of your room to have your first meal of the day. It was ten in the morning. The whole house was empty except for the house helpers and the head butler. You gave them a simple greeting and smile before you proceeded to the kitchen to find something to eat.
“Ms. Lee,” you turned around to see a maid holding a huge box which stopped you.
“Another pr package? Could you place it inside my room? I’ll open it there, thank you,” you ordered with a smile.
“Of course Miss, it also came with a flower bouquet. Would you want to place it in a vase? It was quite big too.” she explained.
Having used these kinds of packages, you only nodded to her question. “Who sent them anyway?”
“It’s from Park Jongseong Miss.”
You stopped. Almost dropping the tupperware of your overnight oats as you heard his name.
“Throw it, I don’t care if it’s big — just throw it okay?” you ordered before eyeing at the box. “Leave that here. Next time, when you receive a package from Park Jongseong, just throw it okay? If it benefits you, you can keep it, just don’t give it to me nor inform me about things like that okay?”
Shaking in fear, the maid nodded, “yes miss.”
She placed the box in front of the kitchen island while you closed the fridge. Having no appetite anymore, you decided to open the sturdy box and to your surprise a dress was neatly folded inside.
But it wasn’t just any dress. It was a vintage Prada dress. You quickly placed the cover on the side and grabbed the dress. Placing it in front of you, your forehead creased as your hands trailed at the delicate piece. Clothes like these don't surprise you, but you were shocked that Jay had sent you this one.
Was it an invitation? I might be. You thought. There’s no way that Jay would send you a dress out of blue especially when you walked out of him last week.
“Miss, this came along with the bouquet,” your attention shifted to the maid who handed you over a small envelope.
You mumbled your thanks before eyeing at the envelope. It was small with a wax seal in the middle. You opened it quietly as your hunches were right — Jay has given you an invitation.
Save the date. — like it was a wedding or something. You couldn’t help but to roll your eyes as you eyed at the invitation once again. The logo of their company stood out on the corner while Jay’s signature was on the bottom right corner of the paper. You wondered what it was about but you guessed that it involved their company.
You decided to bring everything back to your room. Closing the door, that’s when you noticed the numerous missed calls from an unknown number.
Please don’t tell me this is Jay. You thought before pressing the number and letting it ring.
“Good, you picked up, I’ve been calling you for minutes now,” you closed your eyes out of frustration. You were right. It was Jay who called you.
“How did you get my number?” you asked.
“Heeseung gave it to me, since you walked out last week when we have a lot of things to talk about —”
“Wow, “a lot of things to talk about?” good call Mr. Park,” you sarcastically remarked. “When clearly, there’s nothing to talk about.”
“Ms. Lee, I wanted to inform you that whatever we had in the past is in the past, there’s no need to bring it up. I am talking about our publicity stunt that involves our image and reputation.” Jay spoke with a formal tone and you are fighting the urge to curse him on the phone.
“Clearly, I don’t give a fuck about the publicity stunt,” you answered, smiling sweetly as you spoke. “And I made myself clear last week, we can just convince the public that we like to keep our relationship secret and there’s no need for public exposure and stuff.”
“This involves my family Ms. Lee, clearly they don’t know that we’re dating for the sake of publicity.”
“Then that’s a you-problem Jongseong, not mine.”
“Have you even read the damn contract or just skimmed it and called it a day?” Jay asked with an irritated tone. “It is implied there that if one of the parties doesn't comply with the contract’s conditions, they have to pay five billion won as a fine?”
Your eyes widened, “what kind of damn contract is that!? Five billion won!? Are fucking kidding me!?”
“Heeseung made the contract, he made sure that you’re going to comply with it, whether you like it or not. Your signed contract was notarized now by your family’s lawyer by the way,” Jay explained, and you swear to God that you could see his teasing smile over the phone.
“I’m gonna kill him and then I’m gonna kill you after.”
“That’s really nice babe but I still need to show up at my company’s housing project’s grand launching on Saturday — oh by the way, I hope you received the dress, the jewelry set should arrive this afternoon, wear it okay?”
“I guessed I’d just kill myself instead,” you answered instead. “And don’t ever call me that.”
Jay chuckled from the phone, “what? Do you want me to call you ‘wifey’ instead? I don’t mind though. We can settle with the endearments on Saturday, all right? I’ll pick you up at six this Saturday. Goodbye wifey.”
The call ended. You stood there frozen as your phone’s still on your ears. The silence deafened you as Jay’s words kept on ringing in your ears for a minute.
It’s been so long since you heard him call you that. That endearment that used to be so meaningful for you, now became something traumatizing to hear. You could have your heart tearing up once again as you bite your lips to conceal yourself from crying once again.
You don’t understand why Jay was acting like what you had in the past was just something light and casual — like you two didn’t end in a bad light and had many issues to talk about. You couldn’t comprehend in your mind how Jay talked to you like you were his business partner — as if he didn’t make you the happiest girl back in Barcelona.
But then again, this is Jay that we’re talking about. The same guy who left you for his career. He’s just doing this for the sake of his image and reputation. He’s not doing it for you, you convinced. You’re just a stain that almost ruined his image — nothing more and nothing less.
-
A black sleek Mercedes-Benz arrived at the doorsteps of your house by six in the evening.
Upon the announcement of his arrival, that was cue. You grabbed your purse that matched the dress’ color, and with a few touches and perfume spray, you left your room.
Jay was waiting by the living room, perfect in his three-piece suit as he checked his cufflinks last minute. Only did you get his attention when your Louboutin's clinked against the marbled tiles of your house’s staircase. Jay’s head turned quickly, eyes locked on you who’s walking downstairs.
His hand reached for you instinctively, and you quickly rolled your eyes as you ignored his hands, going downstairs on your own — it didn’t take too long for him to grab you by your arms.
“Oh my god, are you going to keep on grabbing my arms!?” you shrieked, tugging your arms away but his hold tightens. “Jay, you’re hurting me —”
“Could you please be professional for once and just go along with the contract?” he asked with a serious tone, making you raise an eyebrow.
“Unlike you Jay, I could never act professional when you’re around,” you stated. “Call me immature or whatever but do you think it’s easy for me to forget everything about us?”
“I am not asking you to forget about it,” he replied sharply. “Just for six months. Six damn months just go along with it. Just for the sake of our reputation, just do it. After six months, you can hate me all you want — loathe me, I don’t care! Just play pretend for once.”
Perhaps it was his tone that settled your anger down. The mixture of frustration and desperation. You hated that you quickly understood Jay despite all the hatred you had for him — just like you, he doesn’t like the situation too, but for reputation’s sake, he had no choice.
You wanted to lash out, to push him away, and tell him to fuck off, you don’t want to see his face ever again — but you signed the contract. You have to comply with every condition written there.
For your family’s name and for your reputation. That’s all you had to look after, not your past with Jay or whatever lingering feelings you have with him.
Six months. Just six months. You could pretend that you two are okay, and he’s the love of your life — what a damn joke.
It’s a sickening play to act, but you had no choice. Everything was your fault after all. That’s why you lowered your pride this time, face softening as you look at him.
“Fine.” you said in defeat.
“Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me Jay, don’t you ever thank me,” you dictated. “I’m doing this for myself.”
The drive on the way to the convention hall was idly quiet. It was a silent truce for the two of you. The act had just begun and you’re internally praying for your frail heart to not be weakened by whatever scheme Jay will pull up from his sleeves.
Once you two reached the entrance, Jay had left his seat, giving the keys to the valet before opening your car’s door. You only gave him a glance before accepting his hand, his hold firm on yours, giving you the warmth that you’re in denial to accept.
“Ready?” he asked.
You looked at him before giving him a short nod. He removed his hand and placed it with his arms, you wrapped yours around it and with one last glance, the two of you went inside the convention hall.
The hall was bustling with people. Known names and wealthy businessmen gathered together for the grand launch of another housing project of the Park’s company. Press and reporters were also present, that’s why it didn’t surprise you when flashes of cameras welcomed you the moment you two entered the hall.
Whispers became louder and the camera’s flashes became blinding, and yet, you kept your smile as your hold on Jay’s arm tightened. You could feel your heart bursting out anytime, your nerve coming all over you now that the attention’s on you and Jay.
Unlike you, Jay was calm and collected, wearing his usual formal smile as he looked at the cameras one-by-one before he tugged you towards the direction of his parents.
“So this is the girl who swept your feet Jongseongie?” his mother started, eyeing at you with a smile. You felt intimidated as it felt like she was dissecting you.
"It's a pleasure to meet you Mrs. Park,” you greeted with a soft tone. “I do apologize because of the trouble I caused —”
“Nonsense! Young love, and rumors, articles tend to be overexaggerated. I’m sure that what you and Jongseong had is real." she quickly brushed it off before giving you a genuine smile, making you chuckle out of nervousness.
“Nonetheless ma’am, I wish you could’ve known my relationship with Jongseong in a better manner,” you insisted.
The old woman chuckled once again at your words and instead of saying anything, she just pats your shoulder, “it’s not your fault sweetie don’t worry, I just wished Jongseong had introduced you earlier.”
“Mom, we’re taking things slow, it’s been just a month for us,” Jay justified. “Could you please excuse us now? I think y/n needs a drink.”
His mother eyed her son for a second before nodding. “Alright son, seems like you just want some alone time with her.”
Jay ignored his mother’s teasing tone before pulling you away from her — almost dragging you towards the wine section.
“She seems nice,” you commented.
“And interrogative,” Jay objected. “She’s just playing along, my mother almost fainted because of our scandal. She doesn’t believe that what we’re doing right now is real.”
You raised an eyebrow, “well, she has a good sense then, why not just tell her the truth?”
“Because she’s conservative, she believes in the sanctity of marriage and seeing me having a one-night stand scandal outraged her — why would I even have sex with someone I don’t even want to marry?”
“Right, why would you Jay? To someone you don’t want to marry?” you asked with a teasing tone.
He glanced at you, eyes glaring as he passed you the glass of wine which you accepted, electrified by the small touch of his skin, “you don’t even remember that night y/n.”
“And I could see that you were sober enough to know what happened,” you pointed out. “So why? Why would you sleep with me, knowing well of our past?”
“Have you ever thought that maybe it was you who threw herself to me that night?” he rebutted and you merely hummed.
“And you took advantage of it, right? I was drunk Jay, I was not in the right mind — while you? I supposed you’re sober that night since you keep on insisting that I barely remember anything.”
Jay didn’t say a word, he only stared at you as he took a sip on his wine. You chuckled in disbelief as you took a sip of yours.
“So why?” you asked once again.
“We’re not having that conversation here.” Jay stated.
You smirked, “right, gonna play lovers first, alright hubby, what’s the next agenda?”
“Y/n.”
“What? You asked for this didn’t you?” you smiled.
He wasn’t able to rebut your words because someone had approached him regarding the formal opening of the event. He glared at you one last time, and you offered him a sweet smile before he decided to just follow the organizer of the event instead. A sigh of relief escaping you since you had won this time.
You were left to entertain your own. Some were friendly enough to approach and strike a conversation with you, knowing that your family’s a prominent name in the country. You’re used to these scenarios, so with a fake smile and sweet tone, you played nice in front of the public — just like what your family wishes you to do.
Conversations were mostly about you and Jay. Same questions; when did you guys meet, what did you like about him, and apologies for getting caught with the scandal. It annoyed you for a moment, but you just decided to brush it off and gave them the information that they wanted.
Another hour had passed before the event had formally started. Jay was in front, a glass of champagne on his hand as he recited his speech about their company’s new housing project somewhere in Seoul.
Everyone applauded, while you stood there, eyes never leaving him. He looked so mature — so clear of his future. Far from the Jay you met in Barcelona. He knew the words that he needed to say and the words were eloquent and appropriate — far from your reckless and spoiled self, and that stung you for a bit.
It felt bitter. Seeing your ex-boyfriend achieving everything that he wanted. He’s the CEO of their company now. He has a bright goal for his company while you’re still hung up with your freedom — still hung up with your past relationship with him.
Now, watching him from a distance, you wondered what would’ve been if you weren’t that drunk that night. Maybe, you could’ve saved you and Jay’s reputation. In that way, you could’ve saved your heart from its incoming pain too.
“So, you’re my twin brother’s girlfriend,” you flinched when you heard a voice from your left side.
There stood a man who’s pale as a ghost. Hair cleaned and bangs down along with his glasses, he was wearing a more leaned smart casual compared to Jay’s expensive suits. He was smiling at you, and you raised an eyebrow.
“Jay’s twin brother?” you asked.
“Park Sunghoon,” he introduced as he stretched out his hand.
“Oh, the racer,” you remembered before accepting his hands. “You’re quite handsome.”
“Thanks, I get that a lot,” he spoke and you smiled at his words.
“More handsome than Jay though.” you clarified and he chuckled at your compliment.
“I have a girlfriend, for your information.”
You smiled became sweeter, more flirtier as you removed your hands from his. “Can I compliment you without thinking that I am hitting on you?”
“You said I’m more handsome than your boyfriend.”
“Why? It’s a subjective preference,” you insisted, casually shrugging. “Despite being more handsome than him, Jay’s still my type though. Hope that eases you that I am clearly not interested in you.”
“You’re weird, I wonder why Jay talks about you like you’re a goddess or something.”
“Now you’re exaggerating.”
“I know,” he smirked. “I hope you'll take good care of Jay.”
“What am I? His caretaker?” you raised an eyebrow.
“Just looking after him. Do you know that he used to work in America?” Sunghoon asked and you shook your head as answer.
“Why? What’s up with America?” you asked.
Sunghoon leans close to you, your breath halting as you feel him too close to you.
“Why don’t you go and ask him about what happened to him in America?” he whispered in your right ear before giving you a meaningful stare, making you confused as to what he meant.
“What do you mean?”
But Sunghoon only smirked as he glanced at your back, making you turn around only to see Jay walking towards the two of you.
“Well, I guess our conversation had been cut short, I hope I’ll see you around y/n,” Sunghoon raised his wine glass before walking away from you — just in time for Jay to arrive at your place.
“People are looking y/n,” he warned and you raised an eyebrow.
“I am just talking to your brother, if you see it with any malicious intent, that’s your problem,” you stated. “Unless you’re jealous.”
He scoffed, “I am not jealous. I am just making sure —”
“That my image is good? I care for it too Jay. There's nothing wrong with talking to Sunghoon. Was I the one who leaned close to him? No right? So don’t you think that I was doing something bad here, ” you refuted.
“Just be careful,” he advised once again.
“I am careful,” you smiled at him sweetly. “It’s you who should be careful. Now, if you want to convince people that we’re a couple, give me a smile and kiss rather than throwing daggers at me with your stare.”
Jay’s serious expression softened for a moment. He heaved out a sigh before wrapping his arms around your shoulder, before you knew, his lips landed on the temple of your face. Murmurs began to fill the venue but you chose to ignore it as you stare at Jay with a devilish smirk on your face.
“See? It’s not that bad right?” you taunted.
“You’re going to be the death of me,” he whispered to you.
“Not if you killed me first,” you whispered back. “But then again, you agreed to this idea, so you better suck it up, Park.”
Jay didn’t say another word — not when his father tapped his shoulder, requesting his presence to talk to some business partner. Jay nodded at his father’s request and you’re sure that he was about to leave you alone, but Jay had pulled you along with him. His right hand snaked around your waist, holding you tightly as he leaned to your ears.
“Better put on a great show wifey,” his words sent chills down your spine. You only stared at him and the next thing was he had stolen a kiss from you. With a smirk on his face and the shocked expression of yours, it was easy to say who had won the argument that moment.
You weren’t able to refute his words. You stuck beside him as your persona changed into that sweet and darling socialite of your family, now in a more upgraded version of being Jay’s significant other.
The whole night, you stood beside Jay, like a trophy wife of his. Smiling and charming every businessman he talked to which left them impressed by your presence.
Jay easily went along with it. He felt natural with the way he held your waist dearly, the subtle kisses on your temple and forehead, and even leaning down when you wanted to say something — you two could pass as actors just for the show.
Never did he think that your insides were churning, every smile and gestures he made you want to throw up.
If this is what you’ll be doing for the next six months, you’d soon feel yourself slowly being killed inside — and yet, you suck it up. It was out of sheer spite. You wanted to prove him wrong that you could be professional and set aside everything you two had, just to prove to him — to everyone, especially your family that you could comply with the stunt.
The event ended before the clock struck twelve.
Jay dropped you off at your place. The whole ride was nothing but mere silence. Something about tonight felt so draining compared to the past events you’ve attended. You assumed it was because pretending was way harder than you thought, especially when you have to deal with your ex-boyfriend who seemed to be casual with the idea.
Thankfully, Jay didn’t bother you throughout the ride. He could’ve sensed that you had no energy to talk to him and he let it be. Drowning the silence of the ride with the music humming on the radio.
“Thank you,” Jay blurted out before you could even get out of the vehicle. “For playing along.”
You blinked, sinking in what just happened that night. You looked at him dead in the eye. “I told you to not thank me Jay. I am doing this for my own good.”
“You’re quick to dissolve the act,” he commented.
“It’s just the two of us here, there’s no need to pretend,” you mumbled before opening the door. “I hope tonight was enough for you, don’t call me or text me anymore, I don’t want to see you ever again.”
“You know you have to put up with me for the next six months right?”
“Why?” you glanced back at him. “Why Jay? Why do we have to suffer in this pretend relationship when both of us are too angry at each other?”
“Who says I am angry at you?”
You looked at him for a minute. His expression was serious yet soft, and you almost fell for it.
A scoff of disbelief escaped your lips instead, stepping out of the car before leaning down to look at him. “Jay, I hate you enough that I don’t want to see your face, and I am saying this again, I am doing this for my reputation, not yours, and I am not going to be at every event and public appearance you have. I hope this will be the last time we see each other.”
Jay didn’t say a word. The door slammed so hard that he had gritted his teeth at the sound. He watched as you entered your house and did not even bother looking back at him — leaving him there looking like a fool, as he brushed his hair out of frustration before deciding to drive away.
-
If only the contract had a one month validation then you would have peace.
Surely, it’s been a month since that Saturday event occurred. You were thankful that Jay was still a CEO nevertheless — which means he’s a busy man, and that also means he’s too busy to spare time for you.
Jay didn’t text nor call you for a month, and you could feel relieved at the idea that your past isn’t haunting you — and hopefully, for the next few months, he won’t either.
You kept yourself busy. You attended events, went to brand launches, and spent your free time with just you and only you alone, like you used to do. Acting like you don’t have a boyfriend who is supposed to be there to carry your bag, to shower you with love in public, but whatever, you’re good on your own.
Perhaps a month was too long because it caught you off-guard that Jay showed up at one of the charity events you launched along with your friends, wearing smart-casuals and holding a huge bouquet of lilies on his hands.
“What are you doing here?” you asked the moment you’re in front of him, glaring at him whose nose was runny and red, a funny sight for you.
“Congratulations on the event, I didn’t know you’re the type to throw events like this,” he said before handing you the bouquet, way too harsher than he supposed but you know that he couldn’t breathe properly at that moment, so you accepted.
“You’re so performative,” you commented, eyeing at the gorgeous flower arrangement which should’ve flattered your heart but Jay’s continuous sniffing wasn’t helping. “Stop giving me flowers if it’s going to be the death of you, showing up would be fine — how did you even know about this?”
“A friend of a friend informed me that you’re one of the main organizers, which saddens me that you didn’t inform me about this.” Jay explained, making you roll your eyes.
“It’s a charity event Jay, you think that it’s necessary for us to show PDA when there are children dying?” you raised an eyebrow.
“Touchè.” he commented and you only groaned at his comment.
“Are you done? You could leave now, I am busy here and if you’re going to disturb me then —”
“Pack your bags,” Jay told you, halting your words.
“Excuse me what?”
“Pack something worth a week, it’s f1’s grand prix in Singapore this week, we’re going to watch it.” he explained.
“Jay, I have plans this week.”
“Already asked Heeseung to clear them,” Jay replied. “We’re going to support Sunghoon. Singapore is his lucky country.”
“Is this necessary? Would it be bothersome that your twin’s race would be overshadowed by us?”
Jay chuckled at your words, “the Park twins in one event? It’s a blast, with their girlfriends? That’s another headline to watch out for.”
“Is that really necessary?” you asked once again, groaning against his words.
“Just supporting my brother wifey,” he answered.
“You’re going to be the death of me Jongseong,” you mumbled back, and yet, you were left with no choice, knowing if you didn’t comply, you had to pay the fine. “Alright, this event will end around three, I don’t know what you want to do, maybe stick around and donate a huge amount — just don’t disturb me at the moment, I am busy.”
“I already did donate earlier, I’m just passing by,” he didn’t let you say another word when he placed a quick peck on your cheeks, completely catching you off-guard. You watched as the smirk on his lips became evident as he stared at you. “I’ll pick you up later at eight wifey, don’t worry about the expenses too, I had it covered.”
He left you there with jaw-dropped and a blushing mess. You badly wanted to throw the lilies back to him but you concealed it, changing your demeanor and pretending that what he did just made your heart skip a beat.
-
Singapore was heated — both from the weather and the grand prix.
You and Jay arrived at the day of the race, gathering attention from the media and crowd. You wore a muted red dress that’s thin enough for the hot weather, while Jay was wearing a red polo shirt with Ferrari's logo embroidered on the right chest area — a perfectly curated choice of outfit for the race and the stunt. You were holding hands with Jay as you plastered your smile as the media continued taking photos of the two of you.
After a short interview about how you two feel about the race, you two moved towards the Ferrari team’s pit garage. Jay seemed to be used to the place, greeting the staff and team there with a smile and firm handshake, along with introducing you to them. You gave them your bright smile as they guided you to an area where you could monitor the race.
“Wonyoung!” Jay shouted, calling the attention of the girl who was monitoring the screen. She glanced at the two of you before giving them a smile and wave.
“Y/n this is Wonyoung, Sunghoon’s girlfriend,” Jay introduced as she waved once again.
“It’s nice to meet you,” she greeted with a smile which you reciprocated immediately.
“It was nice meeting you two — wow, you’re so beautiful,” you complimented, making her smile wider. “What do you do for a living? You could be a model, you know?”
“Thank you, I’m taking law at the moment, but I’m also a professional ballerina,” she shared and that amazed you further.
“How long have you and Sunghoon been together?” you asked.
“About four years. We met in New York,” Wonyoung shared, before eyeing you and Jay. “You two are fairly new right? Sorry, Sunghoon talked about you two that’s why I knew.”
“It’s okay, I’m used to it.” you assured before continuing your conversation with her.
The race started a few minutes later. With the countdown going down to zero, all you could hear was the loud sprint of race cars towards the route for the following moment.
Unfortunate to you, you have zero knowledge about formula one and racing. Wearing earmuffs, you stared at the screen with your mind blank, only eyeing Sunghoon’s car that had an 8 placed on it, not knowing what’s happening as the announcer continued to ramble about the race.
You aren’t used to this kind of event. It’s too noisy, too masculine, but Wonyoung, who was standing next to you, seemed to be used to it. Eyeing carefully at the monitor screen as her hands clasped like she’s praying for her boyfriend’s safety.
Your eyes would shift to her from time to time, feeling a small envy at how she’s maintained her long relationship with Sunghoon. Even after your short conversation with her earlier, you’ve felt that their relationship was a fairytale-like dream especially with how they met.
While you? Here you are playing pretend with your ex-boyfriend. Jay was too focused on the race, too distracted that he’s being too loud and noisy — and it irritated you.
“Jay, could you please calm down? You’re like a kid who ate a whole jar of sugar,” you nagged and Jay only eyed you.
“You don’t understand, Sunghoon’s on fifth — that’s his highest place in his career, if he could pass the others, he might have a chance of getting a podium.” he explained and yet, everything he said just flew past your head.
“Frankly, I really don’t understand Jay, you literally dragged me here just to watch Sunghoon’s race.” You reiterated.
“Could you at least act like you’re enjoying the race?”
“Jay, you know me, these kinds of things aren’t exactly my type of hobbies.” you pointed out. “What kind of boyfriend are you if you’re going to bring your girlfriend to places that she clearly doesn’t give a fuck about?”
“What kind of girlfriend are you if you couldn’t support your boyfriend’s brother’s career?” he spatted. “And stop frowning, cameras are everywhere.”
“Funny that you warned me about that when you’re the one who looks like an angry bird here.”
“Just shut the fuck up.” he commanded and you smiled at him.
“Or what?” you taunted, raising an eyebrow.
“Are you guys fighting?” you two stopped when Wonyoung’s voice hovered in the area. The two of you turned your heads towards her, who had a worried expression on her face.
“Just a small misunderstanding, y/n was just asking some questions,” Jay immediately reasoned out. “What happened?”
The girl seemed to be convinced, nodding as she shifted her eyes back to the screen. “Still halfway through the race, Sunghoon’s place is still fifth — just praying everything’s going well.”
Jay nodded at her words, focusing his attention towards the screen while you grumbled something under your breath as you tried to watch the race once again.
“Behave.” Jay spoke with an authoritative tone.
“You’re not the boss of me Park,” you sassed.
He stared at you for a second, ice cold that you flinched.
But you were startled when his lips landed on yours perfectly. Loud and soft that it didn’t process in your mind what just happened.
“That’ll shut you up,” he smirked before shifting back towards the race leaving you alone.
You became quiet for the remaining moments — the only thing you were thinking of was how warm Jay’s lips were on yours. Kisses were still part of the contract, but you didn’t expect him to kiss you on the lips — in front of the public, if you may add.
It didn’t even process in your mind that the pit garage started to become more noisy and rougher as an announcement that felt deaf to your ears boomed through the whole place.
“What happened?” you asked.
“Sunghoon just secured a podium after taking over Mercedes,” Jay explained, excitement written all over his place. “If he remains in his position until the final lap, it’ll be his first podium since he started his career.”
“Oh, is that great?” you asked, internally wincing at how dumb you feel right now.
“Of course, it means that his career won’t go to waste,” Jay shared. “It’s also a big slap to our parents that he’s on the right path.”
You nodded, eyes darting back on the screen. You don’t know how many laps are left in the race but Jay became louder, shouting encouraging words and curses as he watched his twin brother’s race against the other sports car. You only stood there watching as your eyes remained on the screen, still processing everything that’s happening.
Then it came. A shout. A string of curses as Jay and Wonyoung started screaming. The whole pit garage started to celebrate. Everyone was crying and shouting in happiness while you only looked at them confused.
“Oh my god!” Wonyoung shouted, eyes almost like a saucer and mouth opened wide. “Oh my god Jay!”
“Holy shit!” Jay shouted as he roughly brushed his hair, a deep exhale escaped his lips. “P1! He got a fucking p1!”
“Sunghoon won! He won — oh my goodness!” Wonyoung shouted, tears started to drip from her eyes as her knees weakened at the news.
“What —” you weren’t able to process everything when Jay hugged you all of the sudden. Your eyes widened at his action but you weren’t able to do anything but to let his whole body swallow you whole.
“Sunghoon won! He won this race y/n!” Jay announced. Lifting you up and spinning you around like a doll. That’s when it sinked into you why the team became more loud, more rougher as their cheer boomed inside the pit garage.
You eyed the monitor. Seeing Sunghoon’s car drawing circles inside the track before getting out of the car. His voice was loud enough as he screamed for his victory. He removed his helmet out of excitement, running towards his team where he was welcomed with scream and cheers.
Then Wonyoung went out of the garage, jumping in joy as Sunghoon ran towards her. Lifting her up as he gave her the most bone-crushing hug you have ever witnessed. You watched as Wonyoung kissed Sunghoon who reciprocated it more aggressively. Cameras started to swarm them — it looked like something straight out of a romance movie. Your eyes were on them that it hadn’t sinked into you that Jay was still hugging you, his hug becoming tighter as his head rested on top of yours.
“Fuck — holy shit —” you could hear his muffled sobs, which surprised you, that’s why you became concerned as Jay’s body started to shake.
“There, there,” you hushed as you rubbed circles on his back. “Sunghoon did great, he won.”
“I’m so proud of him,” Jay shared before lifting his head. You looked at him as his eyes were watery and red. Quipping a smile, you only cupped his cheeks, brushing it tenderly as you felt a sigh of relief escaping his lips which settled you down.
“I’m sure you are,” you only told him with a smile.
“Thank you, thank gods — I,” you nodded at his stutters. Knowing it was hard to process his twin brother’s win, you let him crash down on you as you pulled him on a hug once again even though your heart was panicking deep inside.
-
Sunghoon’s win was historic.
His name was all over the news and everything varied; his win, his victory kiss with his girlfriend, and of course, Jay’s presence in the pit garage along with you. Every article was filled with positive feedback from the public, and even your moment with Jay at the pit garage trended because of the sweet moment.
After the race day, Sunghoon stayed in Singapore for another day. The twins had surprised you and Wonyoung with a double date, and you weren’t able to reject it since it’s a celebration of Sunghoon’s win too.
The Marina Bay Sands looked breathtaking by evening. You arrived at the dock around seven in the evening. The waters were calm as the night was filled with a chill breeze. You were wearing something casual for the night, not knowing what the Park twin’s plans were as the four of you arrived by the dock.
“What do you mean this isn’t a double date?” you whispered to Jay as the two of you were being separated from the couple, going to another yacht parked nearby.
“Sunghoon has plans,” Jay shrugged. “Just enjoy the night, think of it as a celebration of his win.”
“Right, but he’s not my boyfriend.” you objected.
“Of course, he’s your boyfriend’s twin brother.”
You scoffed, “you’re enjoying this too much hubby.”
“I like teasing you wifey,” he smirked before he leaned closer to you. “And don’t forget to smile, photographers are everywhere. You don’t want to make a scene right?”
You only stared at him before rolling your eyes. Jay chuckled at his win, grabbing your hands as the two of you were guided towards the yacht’s entrance.
The yacht sailed off. You enjoyed the breeze of the night as it flew past the waters and stopped somewhere in the middle wherein it’s far enough from the land yet still near to see a portion of Singapore. The night fell into a cool breeze, and thankful enough, you were wearing a long-sleeved blouse for tonight.
Jay led you outside wherein a table for two was set along with the candle lights and fancy wine. You stared at it for a second before Jay guided you towards your seat. He was chivalrous enough to push the seat for you before going to his seat.
“So, Sunghoon and Wonyoung are having the same thing?” you asked, eyeing at the yacht a few meters apart from the two of you.
“Of course,” Jay said. “We planned this after all.”
“Planned?” you raised an eyebrow.
“For publicity of course,” he reminded, making you quiet before a bitter smile formed on your lips.
“Right, of course,” you mumbled. “Then don’t forget your sweetest smile then Jay — like you’re hopelessly in love with me.”
“Do you really want it? You might fall in love with me again.” he tested.
“I’d rather fall out of this yacht than let it happen.” you told him with a smile.
“Then I’d dive in to save you.”
You scoffed at his words, “can we start eating now?”
Dinner was served a few minutes later. Despite the tension you two had earlier, you ate with ease. The food was great, a bit cold but you understand that it’s been sitting inside the yacht for hours, and since you were hungry, you ate without any complaints.
The two of you ate in silence — in an awkward, quiet silence since this has been the first time you two had gone out for a “date.” you ignore the way Jay kept looking at you from every minute. It had you wondering if he wanted to strike a conversation or maybe, he just wanted to check on you.
As the night became deeper, the tension started to dissolve as the plates became clean and the bottle of wine had been half-emptied.
“Did you enjoy Singapore?” Jay asked out of nowhere.
“It was okay,” you answered bluntly, since for the past few days, you were just at the grand prix with Jay. “I’ve been here a hundred times, so this is nothing new for me.”
“Even the grand prix?”
“I was totally clueless about it,” you stated. “I think I’m going to trend for looking bored inside the pit garage.”
Jay looks at his phone, smiling as he shows you the screen, “I think we’re trending for a different reason.”
You knew what he meant. You nodded at his words, “You were crying.”
“I was just overjoyed. Sunghoon’s been pushing himself hard just to get a podium — but a win? It was more than we wished for.”
“You’re proud of him.”
“I am, of course I am,” he only smiled and that made your heart skip a beat. “Thank you for comforting me too. That’s the reason why we’re trending too.”
“Good job to us then,” you only said, hoping that your words didn’t feel bitter. “So what’s Sunghoon’s plan?”
“You’ll see.” Jay shortly replied.
“Does that mean we have to wait til it happens? I’m getting sleepy now.” you complained and Jay only chuckled.
He then glanced at his watch, smiling as the time ticked before looking up to the sky. “Just wait, it’ll be out in a few minutes.”
Just in time he had finished his words. A loud explosion of fireworks lit up the sky, surprising you. Colorful lights and fire hovered over Singapore's sky. A gasp escaped your lips as you stood up from your seat. Head staring at the sky as you watch the continuous fireworks show.
“Oh my god!” you shouted the moment your eyes landed on the other yacht.
“He’s proposing! Sunghoon’s proposing!” you shouted in excitement as you looked at Jay who only had a small smile.
“I told you he has plans,” Jay stated, eyes on you who was watching the scene unfold.
Your heart glistened in bliss as despite not hearing their conversation, you knew that Wonyoung said yes. The way she jumped in joy, hands covering her opened mouth before placing her right hand in front of Sunghoon.
They hugged and Sunghoon pulled her to a loving kiss — and you became quiet yet filled with joy for Wonyoung.
“Wow,” it was the only thing you could say before sitting back on your seat. “It was so beautiful.”
“Really?” Jay amusingly asked.
You nodded. Smile still wide at the thought. “They’re made for each other too — I just, gosh, being in love is such a beautiful thing right?”
Jay’s stare on you never left, his gaze softening as he replied, “of course.”
The atmosphere changed. Throughout the remainder of the night, the two of you talked like a couple who’s out on a date. None of your minds ever crossed what you two used to be. No one dared to ruin the atmosphere of the night. Perhaps just for once — the two of you wanted to set it aside, confined with the pretend relationship you two had — that is, if you two are even pretending at that moment.
Because you didn’t notice how Jay’s eyes glistened as he stared at you, or how you talked nonstop to him, sharing gossip and laughter as if you weren’t rolling your eyes at him earlier. The night shifted into this atmosphere that somehow felt peaceful for the two of you.
Even when you two had arrived back at the dock, the smile on your face never left. It even became wider when you approached Wonyoung who gave you a tight hug.
“It’s so gorgeous!” you complimented as you looked at the silver band with a huge deep peridot as the stone.
“It’s my birthstone,” Wonyoung smiled.
“It’s a Park tradition,” Sunghoon explained, his smile proud. “The ring she’s wearing is a family heirloom. It means that she’s part of the family now.”
“Congratulations,” you bid to Wonyoung again.
“I’m expecting you at my wedding,” she stated.
You only nodded at her words before you two looked at the ring once again, ignoring the twins who looked at the two of you with much fondness.
“Someday, you’d be in my place too,” Sunghoon whispered to his twin.
Jay bitterly laughed, “you think so?”
“Just hold on there man,” he stated before shifting his gaze back at you. “It takes time after all.”
-
Perhaps it’s the way he holds you — or the way Jay looks at you. Your heart doesn’t skip a beat anymore and all your anxiety starts to wash off.
Slowly, you’re convinced that you’ve grown adjusted to it.
Got used to his hands wrapped around your waist, his hand holding yours — even brushing your hair. Got used to his hands, the kisses — cheeks, temples, and hands. It feels natural every time he does it that your heart doesn’t betray you anymore. It got so used to all of it that you’ve become numb at it.
You also got used to his dates and invitations. The big public appearance on important events or just a stroll by the park. You had the choice to refuse, make up a lie and convince him that you’re not feeling well. But you always say yes because in the back of your mind, if you don’t comply, you have to pay a hefty amount of money — as if it was even a problem in the first place.
“You okay?” your thoughts snapped out when you heard Jay’s voice.
“I’m okay,” you immediately replied. “What are we doing again?”
“We’re going to our family seamstress, we need to get your own dress for Sunghoon’s wedding,” Jay explained.
“Is this why you invited me over lunch?” you asked as you took a sip on your juice.
“You don’t turn down my invites though,” he rebutted.
“Well I don’t want to pay five billion won,” you said. “Why is it necessary for us to go and shop for clothes together when you could just have it delivered to me like the previous dresses.”
“Because I want us to match,” he suggested, and you raised an eyebrow at him. “And just think of it as a last gift for you.”
“So romantic,” you sarcastically replied and yet you let him be, because you’re used to this scenario. The dates that were always filled with bitterness and remarks. The way he smirks and you scoff at his words as the tension between you continues to leak and yet — from an outsider’s perspective, you two are just a couple who’s in love with each other.
You two didn’t end up at the shopping district — Jay drove towards a farther shop outskirts. You raised an eyebrow as you ended up somewhere less crowded and in a more quiet street in the area.
“We have a custom tailor for weddings and important family events,” Jay shared as he opened the car’s door for you. “They’ve been making our suits and gowns for generations, that’s why I brought you here.”
“I’m not even going to be part of your family,” you stated and Jay bitterly smiled.
“I just want to give it to you as a gift.” he reasoned out. “Come on.”
The store was huge nonetheless. The first thing you saw were the hundreds of ready-to-wear gowns and suits on display. It was quiet, faintly smelled like fabrics and peppermint tea. You wandered at the photos displayed on the walls, seeing their creations and designs that left you in awe.
The two of you were greeted by an elderly couple who seemed to have known Jay since he was baby. With a couple of instructions and suggestions, Jay was being led by the old man while your eyes were still on the photo wall.
“Why don’t you try some first?” Jay suggested. “I needed to get my measurements done, you can go check out some of the gowns.”
“Alright,” you proceeded to skimmed at the rack, choosing some different gowns before proceeding towards the fitting room.
Every gown was perfect for you. The material, the design, and even the color. You badly wanted to take them all but you knew it’ll be too much to ask — you just needed the perfect gown for the wedding.
You returned to the rack a few minutes later before proceeding to grab a few more to try. You were so busy looking at the displays that you didn’t notice that the old lady had approached you.
“Try this one,” the old lady said, handing you a white one, making your eyes wide.
“Oh, I shouldn’t wear that, it’ll be disrespectful for the bride,” you said.
“Of course dear, but would you like to try?” she asked. “You’re here nonetheless, might as well try on the gowns you’ve never seen before.”
You stared at her before she insisted on the gown. Hence, you grabbed it without any complaints and returned to the fitting room.
The gown doesn’t even suit your taste. A huge ballgown that has an off-shoulder and long-sleeves, it felt too old and traditional for your taste and yet you were surprised how it fit you like a glove — that old lady picked the right one for you.
“You look gorgeous dear,” the owner spoke. “Oh, Jongseongie chose the right girl for him.”
You laughed at her words, “thank you ma’am.”
“Should we show it to Jongseong?” she asked. You stood there for a second before you nodded to her request.
Jay was too busy with getting his measurements checked, not even noticing your presence as the seamstress helped you with carrying the train of the gown.
You didn’t even need to call him out, the tailor who’s measuring him tapped him and pointed at you, and the moment he turned around, you held down your breath.
Jay — in a slow motion, walked towards you. Eyes wide and breath stolen by your mere presence in the white wedding dress.
“Woah,” he breathes out. “You…you look like a bride.”
“Thanks,” you shortly replied with a smile.
“No seriously,” Jay stated, eyes still on yours. “It suits you, you look ethereal.”
You laughed at his words, “using deep words now Jongseong?”
“You know that I like using deep words to compliment someone that I really like.”
“I know, it makes you more smart than you look.”
He smiled and before you knew it, he held your hand and kissed it gently — too gentle for the act as he stared at you like you’re on your wedding day and he’s your groom.
“You’d be the most beautiful bride the world will see,” he stated and your heart stopped.
Not because his words flustered you nor did you blush by his act, but because you found it ironic that he’s the one who’s telling you that compliment.
And yet, you didn’t have the guts to ruin the moment, so you gave him a smile and nod, “thank you Jay.”
The conversation was cut short. You found a cute powder pink gown for the wedding and not long after, they took your measurements for the alterations before you and Jay left the shop for some coffee and pastries back in the shopping district.
“You should buy the wedding gown,” Jay suggested making you glance at him.
“Where would I even use it?” you asked, laughing.
“For your wedding.”
“Really? You think I’ll still get married?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Someday,” he spoke, eyes gleaming softly. “It’s your only dream right? To have your own happy ending?”
“You’re making it sound like it’s a childish thing to dream for.”
“No, I always admired that for you,” he said. “You have everything already, it’s the only thing you wanted the most.”
“I could’ve had it,” years ago. If only you two worked out. But you only stared at Jay and he knew immediately what you meant.
He took a sip on his drink, and you followed him shortly. Letting the silence pour between the two of you — a sudden halt in the conversation as you two telepathically decided that it was best to keep that afternoon quiet instead of letting the atmosphere turn sour by bringing up the past.
And yet, it left a bitter impression on you. At how Jay could be so casual about inviting you on dates and events. How he doesn’t seem to be bothered by your past and everything he does were strictly in compliance with the contract, meanwhile your heart’s burning in ache just by being a few meters near him.
Still, you’ve adjusted to him — and you hated that he had swooned you in just a short span of time, internally cursing your poor heart for being too weak for Park Jongseong.
-
It didn’t help that a few weeks later, Jay showed up at your house for a family dinner — making you raise an eyebrow.
“Your parents invited me,” Jay shared.
“Why?” you asked.
“Why not?” it wasn’t him who answered but instead, your older brother. “They’re curious about Jay, they haven’t formally met him after all. Both of you are still the talk of the town at the moment.”
“Why? They both know that we’re pretending,” you justified.
“Yet, Jay managed to tame you for a bit,” Heeseung smirked and you rolled your eyes.
“That means I don’t have to act sweet towards you,” you snarled at Jay. “good, I’m getting tired of it.”
“You seem used to it,” Jay commented with a devilish smirk.
“Don’t push my buttons Jongseong,” you barked before going towards the dining room.
“Sorry about her,” Heeseung apologized to the younger male, while Jay only laughed.
“It’s okay, I’m used to it,” Jay assured and Heeseung raised an eyebrow knowingly, clicking his tongue as he pats the former’s shoulder.
“Used to it huh?” He spoke with a meaningful smile. “I guess you two got to know each other in just that short span of time.”
Dinner happened around seven in the evening. Complete course meals with rare delicacies and your favorite salad. The first few minutes were just for small talks, but when the wine started to be poured and desserts had sweetened everyone on their seats, conversations became endless, coursing through your pretend relationship and business-related topics.
“You’re a very fine man Jongseong,” your mother spoke with a smile. “Very charming right y/n?”
You chose to ignore her words, focused on your cake which earned a dead air in the table.
“y/n, mom’s talking to you,” Heeseung called out, making you glance at them.
“Yes, Jay’s charming — deadly charming I must say,” you said in a venomous tone.
“Do you have any problems with Jongseong, y/n?” your father asked, raising a suspicious glance at the man.
“She’s just being stubborn again,” your brother justified.
“Wow, it feels like he’s your pretend boyfriend with the way you defend him,” you commented at your brother.
“Because you’re acting like Jay killed you or something — why do you even hate him?” he asked you back, and you suddenly became quiet.
Would it be a perfect way to ruin the dinner by confessing to them that Jay used to be part of your past? Perhaps, if you were feeling irrational tonight, you would’ve let that secret pass your lips, and hopefully, your parents would’ve understood why you had an attitude with the man sitting next to you.
But before you could even speak, Jay’s hands grabbed yours underneath the table. You looked at him who had a genuine smile on his face as he looked at your brother.
“Heeseung, it’s okay,” Jay interjected. “I know it’s not really ideal, our relationship you must say, I understand where y/n’s coming from and don’t worry, there are no hard feelings for both of us.”
“If Jay has no problems, then you shouldn’t be too stubborn y/n,” your father commented. “It’s embarrassing for Jongseong if you keep that attitude.”
“Clearly, he’s used to my attitude,” you spoke before standing up. “And clearly, I am not going to let myself be tamed by some guy just because of one mistake.”
“Your mistake I may add,” Heeseung butted in and you groaned heavily.
“One mistake doesn’t define me,” you gritted before glancing at Jay. “and one mistake is enough for me to learn my lesson. I have enough of this.”
You left the dining room. Your slippers striking against the marbled floor before Jay moved, standing up and excusing himself to follow you eventually.
“That’s quite a show,” Heeseung commented before taking a sip on his wine.
“Heeseung,” his father called out and he only hummed.
“Just trust me with this one dad,” he smiled meaningly. “Just be patient, Jay knows what to do with her.”
You don’t know how Jay somehow found you in your mother’s garden, by the bench nearby the orchid walls. Sitting with your arms wrapped around your knees, a thing you do when you’re worried.
“What are you doing here?” you asked, tone cold and angry that Jay was taken back.
“What the hell is your problem?” Jay asked as he approached you with his expression turned into confusion. “I thought we’re okay? We were fine weeks ago.”
“That’s the problem,” you pointed out. “We’re okay when we’re not supposed to! I should be loathing you Jongseong! Cursing you for breaking my heart and leaving me devastated.”
“You’re still hung up with that!? It’s been three years, you have to move on.”
“Don’t fucking tell me to move on, you don’t dictate that to me when for the past three years that’s what I’ve been trying to do!” you shouted at him, standing up just to face him with nothing but hatred. “Then suddenly, you’re here with this fake relationship stunt, and you’re acting like we’re okay and I hate you for thinking that you could casually enter my life again!”
“We’re in a damn contract y/n, I told you for six months just set everything aside. Just for six months.” he reminded.
“You think I could handle that? Do you think I can handle everything you do to me? Touching me, kissing me, and smiling at me like you’re still in love with me!? You’re so damn good in this pretend act Jay that I don’t even know if what you’re doing is real or not.” you rebutted.
Jay became quiet. He looked at you with a meaningful stare — and that immediately hit you.
“No fucking way.” you breathed out.
“I am not faking it,” Jay confessed. “Everything I do, it’s real.”
“Fuck you.” you sneered.
“y/n, I still love you —”
“No! Don’t finish that sentence, don’t ever say those words when three years ago you broke my heart.”
“What do you want me to do then? Beg for your forgiveness? Say sorry for what happened that night? It’s not my fault that you couldn’t understand that I’m doing it for our future —”
“Because you knew! You knew that you were going to America and yet you made those promises! You acted like everything’s fine and then you fucking dropped the bomb the night before our flight! Why did you have to hide it from me?” you shouted at him.
“Because I was scared of hurting you!” Jay immediately interjected.
A chuckle of disbelief escaped your lips, “I can handle it, you hurted me more than you were scared of!”
“I didn’t mean to.”
You shook your head. “You promised me that once we settle here we’ll announce our relationship then we’ll get married after two years, but it didn’t happen Jay. You just made empty promises.”
Jay looked at you, his eyes softened, a much calmer demeanor than your angry ones. He looked at you with pleading eyes as he spoke, “those aren’t empty promises y/n. I am still planning to fulfill my promise.”
“Liar.” you dictated.
“I am here y/n, why can’t you see that!?”
“Because I don’t want to see you anymore Jongseong,” you shook your head once again. “You can’t just — can’t just enter my life again, swoon me with gifts and grant gestures. You can’t. It’s unfair.”
“Could you please understand me? Have you ever thought of hearing my side? Do you even know what I went through in America for the past three years?” he pleaded as he tried to get close to you but you immediately took a step back.
“No. I don’t want to. One was enough for us.” you dictated.
“See? You don’t even want to hear my side, now tell me, who’s the selfish one here?” he accused and your forehead creased.
“Is it bad that I want peace? That I want to save myself from hurting again? Call me selfish Jay but I don’t want any of us, not now, not even in the future. I am done with you.” you reasoned out.
“You know we can still make this work right?” Jay spoke. “I can see it y/n, don’t deny it. I know you. I know that your heart still beats for me.”
“I know! And I hate that you still managed to capture my heart even after breaking it.” you confessed. “I hated everything about us because it feels so terribly wrong to still be in love with the man who ruined me that I became nothing. Do you think it’s easy Jay? No, it’s never going to be easy for the two of us.”
“Then we’ll get through it, through hardships, we can make it work this time, alright?” he convinced once again, hands finally getting a hold on you as he pulled you close to him.
“I love you Jay,” you confessed, tugging yourself away from you. “But I love myself more, and I don’t want to be hurt again, and not from the same person all over again.”
Jay was left in daze the moment you confessed those words. He stood frozen as you gave him a soft yet pitiful look, a desperate plea to let you go. He didn’t say another word but instead, let you walk away from him.
-
A knock on the door interrupted Heeseung’s focus on his switch yet he didn’t bother raising his head.
“Heeseung?” you peeked from the small gap of the door, eyeing your brother who’s in his house clothes, playing his switch like a kid — a usual scenario when he’s on his free day.
“Can I come in?” you asked and without sparing a glance, your older brother nodded.
You closed the door of his room and lay beside him, staring at the ceiling of his childhood room which still has glowing stars stuck on it — the same glowing stars that comforted you whenever you had nightmares back when you were just a kid.
Somehow, it gave you a sense of relief. It’s been two weeks since you walked out of Jay. Two weeks of silence and it is eating you alive.
You knew it was Heeseung who started the commotion. It was your brother who started the idea of a pretend relationship in order to save image. Somehow, you wanted to blame your older brother for everything, and yet, you still found yourself running towards him when things became too overwhelming for you.
After all, he doesn’t know about you and Jay.
You have a few months left. You convinced yourself that you can do it and you’d do it out of spite to prove everyone wrong. But fuck it, you don’t need everyone’s validation. The only thing you wanted now was peace in your mind and heart, and continuing your fake relationship with Jay would just tear you furthermore. You couldn’t find the courage to face Jay anymore. Your insides couldn’t handle the feeling of just being near Jay.
Two weeks and you’ve been locking yourself inside your house. Sleeping, eating, and doing nothing — just like what you did when you returned to Barcelona. What a funny deja vu. You thought. What’s more ironic was that it’s because of the same person again.
“Are you here to bother me or do you want to talk about it?” your thoughts snapped away when you heard Heeseung’s tone. Not angry nor annoyed, somehow authoritative and brotherly that your heart frailed for a second.
You gulped at his words, tears started to flow from your eyes as a small sob escaped your lips. “Heeseung — Jay —”
“What about him?” he asked, still playing his game.
“I used to date Jay,” you confessed. “And — and remember Barcelona? I met him there and we dated for months and he broke up with me and it was a really bad breakup. Now the fake dating isn’t helping me at all because I feel like I love him again when I’m supposed to hate him and now I’m scared because I don’t want to get hurt anymore.”
Your cries echoed inside the room. Your older brother was still in his game, still focused for another minute, letting you cry on his bed before he let out a deep sigh. His game was finished, he closed his switch and placed it on the table before shifting to you.
“I know.” Heeseung simply said.
Your crying stopped. Looking at him before sitting up from your position, “wha — what? What do you mean?”
“y/n, I know you and Jay are exes, but not before the scandal,” Heeseung shared, quipping a small smile. “I knew it the day you signed the contract. I followed you two by the elevator and I saw you two fighting.”
Your eyes widened. “You were there?”
Heeseung nodded, “yeah, I was curious why Jay followed you and I witnessed the scene. Right after that, I kinda snooped into Jay’s profile and information and later on, I discovered that he also entered that same fall semester in Barcelona, and I just kinda connected the dots after.”
You stared at him with your eyes still wide before you cried loudly once again. Your brother merely chuckled as he rubbed circles on your back.
“You looked like you went through hell when you returned,” your older brother added. “You barely go out, eat, and you even burned some of your stuff. I didn’t ask you about it because it looked like you were traumatized during your stay there.”
You didn’t say a word but instead you cried once again while your brother chuckled at your childish behavior. He continued to rub your back softly while you let the tears fall from your eyes.
“I’m sorry for causing trouble during our dinner, I was hoping you’d tell the truth to us — but I shouldn’t have pressured you to do so.” he immediately spoke and you only shook your head.
“No, it’s my fault too, I should’ve told you about Jay — even when I was in Barcelona,” you explained.
“Do you want me to pull the ‘older brother’ act and scare him? I haven’t brought it to him that I know about your relationship, I supposed that you two will eventually fix it,” he asked.
“No, I — I don’t know, Heeseung, I just hate him,” you told him. “I hate how he casually entered my life again when the only thing that I’ve been trying to do was forget him.”
“So your feelings came back?”
You nodded as an answer. “And I hated it. I hated that I had fallen for him once again,” you confessed before sniffling your tears. “How can I not? Everything felt real. Us, our pretend relationship, it felt so real and nostalgic for me Heeseung. It’s like Barcelona all over again.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you two used to date, I should’ve prevented it but the contract was already sealed,” Heeseung softly apologized and you shook your head as an objection.
“It’s not your fault Heeseung, things just didn’t go our way. We were planning to tell everyone once we return here but…he left me for America.” you deeply exhaled as you sniffed your tears in. “Now, he’s here, asking for another chance and — and I’m scared that he might hurt me again.”
“It sounds like you wanted to give him a chance, you’re just scared of falling apart again,” Heeseung pointed out. “You know love isn’t always going to be perfect right?”
“I know, I know there will be hardships and challenges,” you mumbled. “But there’s still a part of me who’s afraid.”
“Of getting hurt? It’s pretty normal.”
“Yet I don’t want it to happen again. Once is enough, you know? Why would I give the guy who broke my heart another chance?”
“Because you love him,” Heeseung stated, making you face him. “And even if he had ruined you, if you love him enough that you could forgive him and give him another chance. You’ll live y/n. I know you, you’re stronger than you think.”
With your brother’s words, your heart eased for a bit. You nodded to his words, “can I think about it?”
“You don’t need to rush your feelings, you’re still hurting after all.” Your older brother spoke before giving you a hug. “If it helps, you could lay low — which reminds me, how many months left in the contract?”
“I don’t know, I don’t care about it anymore Heeseung, I don’t want to be near him anymore.” you answered.
“Alright, don’t worry, I’ll handle it,” your older brother assured. “For now, rest, all right? I’ll take care of your contract with Jongseong.”
“You’re not going to punch him aren’t you?”
Heeseung merely chuckled. “Nah, just a few kicks and maybe threats —”
“Heeseung!”
-
The past months moved in a blur. It became an unsteady series for you — filled with fear and anxiety as the time ticks you still couldn’t process everything that just happened to you.
It didn’t help that now, you’re on your way toward Sunghoon’s wedding. Wearing the powder pink gown Jay had delivered at your footsteps a few weeks earlier.
It was his only request — to be his date at his twin brother’s wedding. After that, you two will call it quits and after a month of silence, the two of you will officially call it off to the public. He won’t bother you anymore and your heart, like you wished to be, would be at peace now.
“You’ll be okay,” your older brother comforted the moment he parked the car in front of the entrance. It wasn’t crowded. Only closest friends and relatives were invited to the wedding. It eases you a bit that there’s less people to put on a show to.
“Thank you.” you mumbled to him.
“Just enjoy the rest of the day, alright?” you nodded to his words. “Jay will be driving you home later, would that be okay?”
“Okay, thank you Hee,” were your last words to your brother before you stepped out of the car. You watched as he drove away from the place, leaving you alone with your anxious mind and cold, sweaty hands.
But becoming too anxious wouldn’t help you at all. You decided to enter the venue, informing Jay that you have arrived. He had reserved a seat for you but for now, he couldn’t be with you since he’s helping with Sunghoon’s preparation. Good. That thought relaxed you for a moment.
You kept yourself entertained while waiting for the ceremony. Looking around the ceremony hall wherein photos of the couple were on display in the hallway, filled with arrangements of white baby breaths and powder pink roses. Your smile becomes wider as you look at every photo — love has always been a beautiful thing for you, and attending Wonyoung’s wedding was still something you look forward to.
A few minutes later, you were guided to Wonyoung’s room to give your congratulations. The bride was glowing in her immaculate white gown, smiling as she accepted your gifts before taking a smile.
“You’re nervous?” you asked as you sat beside her.
She merely shakes her head, “not really, I am confident that he’s the one that I wanted to marry after all — I hope you have that same confidence with Jay.”
You meekly smiled, “thank you.”
“Someday, it’ll be your turn,” she whispered to you. “And I hope that I'll be invited.”
“Of course you will,” you lied, smiling at her genuinely before giving her one last hug.
You returned to your seat when the event planner announced that the ceremony will be held in a few minutes later. Soon, the hall was filled with people — friends, families, and people who had witnessed the couple’s love grow.
Sunghoon and Jay entered the venue first. Sunghoon stood in front of the altar with Jay beside him. Immediately, it was noticeable that the groom was nervous, but your eyes were on Jay, and in that minute, your heart skipped a beat.
In contrast to Sunghoon’s white suit, Jay was wearing a black suit, with a pink rose pinned on his side. He was calm and relaxed as he stood beside his twin, easing his nerves as any moment now, the bride will be entering the hall.
A familiar love song from the 80s started to be played by a violinist. The crowd stood up in sync as the door opened, revealing Wonyoung in her wedding dress. Smiling ear-to-ear as she slowly walked in the aisle.
Everyone was in awe. Wonyoung was glowing like a goddess, eyes locked on her future husband who’s waiting at the end of the aisle. But you couldn’t even stay your gaze at the bride. Every second your eyes would shift to Jay — hoping that your eyes would meet. Wondering if he had seen you or was he keeping his distance like you asked him to.
The ceremony started. The vows were simple and the kiss was breathtaking. The newlyweds were smiling ear to ear as everyone stood up to applause and congratulated the couple. You shed a few tears at the love you just witnessed.
You clapped your hands as the couple kissed once again in front of you, your eyes shifted to Jay once again and just like you wished for — your eyes met.
Jay looked at you softly. With a nod, he mouthed, “thank you.” and you knew what he meant, so you just gave him a small smile as you returned your gaze to the newlyweds who cheered at the celebration of a new chapter in their life.
The reception was more glamorous — loud, and fun. The couple had changed into more comfortable reception outfits as they did wedding traditions like their first dance and of course — throwing off the wedding bouquet, which Wonyoung insisted that you should join.
In your relief, someone else had got it. You watched the fun fold further as the night deepened. A few minutes later, you decided to grab a glass of wine since you were feeling parched.
“Enjoying the party?” you turned around to see Sunghoon standing in front of you.
You smiled at him. “Of course, congratulations Sunghoon.”
“Soon it’ll be your turn, you know?” Sunghoon smiled, and your smile turned bitter.
“That’s too good to be true,” you answered, knowing that after tonight, you and Jay will part ways.
“Why? Can’t forgive him after what he did to you at Barcelona?”
You flinched at the mention of the place. Your eyes wide at Sunghoon who flashes a smile. “What? You think I don’t know you two are just pretending? He’s my twin brother, he tells me everything.”
“And here you are telling me that it’ll be my turn.” you commented with an eye roll.
“You know he was planning to propose to you back then?” Sunghoon shared. “He always rambles about you, how you’re the love of his life and all that romantic shits, telling me that he can’t wait to go home and introduce you to the family — he’s so hopelessly in love with you, you know?
“I know because I’ve witnessed it, Sunghoon. But shit happens” you stated. “Telling me this wouldn’t convince me Sunghoon, this is the last time we’ll be seeing each other.”
“You’re the only one who makes him happy,” Sunghoon added, tone softer than usual. “And I am saying this as his twin brother, you’re the only one he truly loved. You don’t know how depressed he was when he was in America. I couldn’t even meet him because he’s just working his ass off —”
“Just to forget about me? I did the same thing here in Seoul. If that’s what really happened, then our breakup was hell and we’re just not meant to be.” you insisted.
“I didn’t mean to disregard your pain,” he acknowledged. “But things like that always happen in relationships. Wonyoung and I? We had a bad breakup two years ago. We didn’t talk to each other for months and it was the worst season in my career. But we made it work, because we love each other.”
“How?” you asked, words almost whispered. “How did you make it work, knowing that you have hurt each other?”
“It came naturally, we’ve talked, we settled down, love works like a miracle, you know?” he spoke with a smile before glancing at his wife who’s dancing with her father.
“I wish it was that easy for us.”
“It’ll be easy for both of you, love is still there after all.” Sunghoon assured.
“Even if the love we had is killing us slowly?” you asked.
“It’s not love if it kills you,” he pointed out. “Maybe what you two had back in Barcelona was just a mere infatuation. Now, three years have passed and maybe, what you two have right now is the love you two deserve.”
“Now you’re confusing me,” you chuckled. “If that wasn’t love, then why now?”
“Time heals everything. You two settled down, set aside feelings for this pretend relationship — does it ever cross your mind? Despite hating him and everything, you still went here? Because deep inside you still care for him.”
You only stared at him, and Sunghoon smiled at you softly. “He deserves a chance y/n — so do you. It’s never too late to fix everything.”
You watched as Sunghoon turned his heel away from you. You stood there frozen as his words lingered in your mind. You mindlessly took a sip on your wine before turning around — only to bump into Jay.
“You okay?” he asked as he held your arms. You stared at him before nodding. This has been the first time you two have been together since you’ve arrived.
“I didn’t stain your suit, didn’t I?” you asked worriedly as the glass of wine remained in your hands.
“You didn’t, don’t worry.” Jay assured. “Were you talking to Sunghoon earlier?”
You nodded, “he knows about us.”
“Yeah, I told him. I told him way back in Barcelona.”
“Oh.” you breathed. “Why?”
“I just couldn’t help it,” Jay confessed. “Not when you’re something that I am proud of.”
You remained quiet to his words. The two of you stood there as the tension between the two of you arose. Quiet and suffocating before Jay cleared his throat.
“Do you want to dance?” Jay asked out of nowhere, making you look at him.
Then your eyes shifted at the couples on the dance floor, dancing in their own world. Feeling the romantic atmosphere of the event.
“Of course,” you took his hand, you let it be — you knew that this will be the last time for you two after all.
Jay held you close — too close for your preference, too close for your poor heart because if only, you weren’t so angry and hateful towards him, and all of this was just for a show, then maybe you would’ve been savoring the moment.
Both of his hands were wrapped around your waist, while yours were resting on his shoulders only, but you let yourself fall for his warmth, hence, you rested your head on his chest. Hearing the soft faint of his heartbeat as well yours.
The two of you danced around in circles, it would’ve looked stupid on the outside but for you — maybe for Jay too, this was the only way you two could be this close without the past lingering on your mind. Without any hindrance of each other’s feeling because the second Jay released his hold on you, you sighed in relief, looking at him with eyes almost glassy which made him give you an assuring smile.
“Thank you,” he said with much gratitude that your heart shrivelled in pain. To add to that, he kisses the top of your forehead leaving you speechless.
You wanted to ask him why he had to do that? But you had no energy to confront him anymore, too tired to deal with everything you and Jay had. That’s why the only thing you did was smile bitterly at him.
The night ended with a glamorous firework display. Sparklers were given to each guest as they waved for the couple’s exit. With one last kiss for the night, the newlywed had driven off from the villa using Sunghoon’s Ferrari.
“Let’s go?” Jay asked, making you glance at him. His right hand opened with a soft smile on his face.
“Okay,” you muttered before accepting his hand. The newlywed had left. Everyone was either leaving or going back to their room. It’s time to go home.
It meant that the night had ended — you and Jay had officially ended.
Jay’s hold tightened onto you. The whole villa was still a beau for you as you wandered around. Eyes looking around as the two of you seemed to be darting further from the open field.
“Is this where your car’s parked?” you asked, and Jay chuckled at your question.
“No, we’re going somewhere.”
“Somewhere?”
Jay stopped, “think of this as our last goodbye.”
His words stung, and yet, you faintly nodded to his words. This is the last time you two are going to be together, might as well endure everything he had prepared for you.
You let Jay lead the way, walking further and further until you two stopped.
“Jay? What is this?” you asked, eyeing at the small helicopter parked downstairs on a wider cemented lot.
Jay only smiled and tugged you downstairs. You were appalled, speechless as the two walked towards the vehicle. You watched as Jay talked to some men with a smile and nods, a few handshakes before they handed something to him.
“Let’s go?” Jay asked, and you weren’t able to do anything when he helped you enter the helicopter.
“Wait — you can drive?” you asked, noticing that it was Jay who sat on the driver’s seat. He casually closed the door. Putting your seatbelt and ear muffs on you before putting on his.
“Yeah, I got my license in America,” he proudly said.
“What? Why?”
“I told you, I’ll fulfill your promise,” Jay said and you weren’t able to say another word.
You watched as Jay turned on the engine with much skill. Pressing unknown buttons and keys in front of you before you heard the noisy turn of the helicopter’s rotor blade. Slowly, the vehicle was being lifted in the air while you held onto your seat tightly.
“Can you really drive?” you asked once again, too nervous for the sudden ride.
“Of course, just trust me,” he smiled at you. “I’m not going to put you in danger after all.”
Your tensed body relaxed for a moment. You sat there as the helicopter slowly rose from the ground until you could see the villa becoming small from your vision.
“Hold on tight,” Jay whispered to you and you let out a small yelp when the vehicle moved faster yet smoothly glided through the sky. The moon beamed in the peak of the night along with the stars that scattered throughout the horizon.
You kept on glancing at Jay who’s relaxed as he controlled the helicopter, driving farther and farther from the land until you could only see nothing but the deep blue sea that’s pitch black in the night yet you were appalled at the view.
You two were up in the air for half an hour before Jay landed at a small island, completely surprising you. A villa that has the same exterior as their country villa welcomed you, the lights were on but the whole place was surprisingly quiet.
“Where are we?” you asked, eyeing at the area.
“Our private villa,” Jay shared as he helped you get down from the helicopter. “This is supposed to be for Sunghoon’s honeymoon but Wonyoung has a schedule in Paris, so they decided to just go there for their honeymoon.”
“Then why —”
“I asked Sunghoon if we could go on behalf of them.” Jay spoke. “You told me one time that you wanted to go here, remember? When I show you some photos from when I was a kid. Well, we’re here now. It’s very beautiful here during the daytime.”
You became quiet as your heart started to race again, betraying you as Jay guided you inside their villa. It was huge and spacious. Its interior was a vintage coastal complementing the cool waves outside. You wander around the space as Jay watched you from a far, a smile on his face beamed.
“It’s beautiful here,” you whispered, looking at Jay.
“We always make sure it’s well-maintained and clean, every summer, we’d have a family reunion here for a week, everyone in the Park lineage would be here to enjoy a week of vacation.”
“Sounds like a dream.” you whispered. Settling down on the couch as Jay remained on where he was standing, eyes on you as the silence deafened the two of you.
“Can we talk about it?” Jay opened up. “Please?”
You knew what he meant. You don’t want to talk about it anymore but perhaps, it is for the betterment of your peace. A closure you could say, since when tomorrow arrives, the two of you would go separate ways.
“Okay, I’ll listen.” you said in defeat.
“Thank you,” Jay merely nodded, hands clasped as he took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I’m deeply sorry for hurting you. I know I shouldn’t compete but I was hurt too. I was devastated when I went to America. Drown everything by working, day and night, I didn’t stop — it was unhealthy for me, but I did it just to forget about you too.”
“I’m sorry for lying to you and hiding it from you, I was scared that I might ruin our moment. I don’t want our happy days to feel like it should be something that we should cherish because it’ll come to an end — you were so happy, and I was happy that you were. I don’t want to ruin it.” he explained and you only stared at him who held a bitter smile on his face.
“It’s my fault, mostly it’s mine. I’m sorry and I know that I’ve hurt you enough but please, you’re all I want,” Jay whispered, begging as he looked at you with tears in his reddening eyes. “I still love you y/n, there’s not a day where I think of you and if you’re doing fine.”
He then approached you, propping on his knees that it caught you off-guard. “You don’t know how much it kills me whenever you looked at me with nothing but hatred and coldness in your eyes — it fucking kills me that it’s my fault that you couldn't look at me the same way anymore, but please — I still want that future with you.”
A tear dropped from your eyes as you stared at him. You couldn’t bear to see Jay crying. You were hurt by him, and he was hurt by his actions too. Maybe Sunghoon was right. Maybe what you two had was just a mere infatuation. You two were immature back then, too stuck in the honeymoon phase that when the real challenge came, it ended badly.
And it’s not too late for the two of you. Not when everything that happened for the past few months were clear signs that both of your hearts still yearn for each other.
You’re just too scared. Too afraid to be hurt by Jay again.
And yet here you are, heart weakening at the sight of Jay who was crying his soul out in front of you. You didn’t say anything but instead you pulled him out from his place and wrapped your arms around him, head buried on his chest as you started to cry in his arms. Jay’s arms tightened his hold on you. His body twitched at every sob he emitted, holding it back as he kissed the top of your head.
“I’m sorry, I was selfish too,” you apologized. “But it really, really hurt me, Jay.”
“I know, I know, and I’m sorry, okay? I’m going to make things right, for us,” Jay promised. “I’m here now, I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying here for good — for you. No more lies, no more acting, I want us to be real this time. I want you to give your full trust to me.”
“Prove it to me Jay,” you asked him. Looking up to meet his eyes, both yours were puffy and red as your lips shook from crying too much. “I want you to prove to me that this is going to be real. We’re going to be real and there’s a future that awaits us.”
Jay didn’t say a word but instead, leaned close to you. His lips landed on yours so perfectly that it felt heaven was placed down on you.
He moved his lips to get a better taste of you. Deeper, hungrier — yet, there’s no rush. You two have the whole night — the whole future to make the moment last.
From there, you kissed him back, with the sense of longing craving for him, you reciprocated his kisses as you snaked your arms around his neck. You tugged him closer to you, feeling his body against you — you could only moan softly, it’s been so long since you two were this close.
Both your worlds fell apart. Jay didn’t want to miss any chance anymore. He grabbed you by the waist and carried you bridal style, earning a yelp from you as he ran his way towards the nearest bedroom.
He placed you down on the bed gently before hovering over you for another heated kiss. Soon, the temperature became hotter. Sweat started to bead as the soft hum of the ocean waves served as a background for the two of you.
Jay’s lips never left yours as he took off every piece of clothing he wore, mindlessly threw it away before he separated and pulled you to stand up and turn around.
His breath was fanning down on your neck, sending you goosebumps as his hands trailed on the zipper of the dress that you were wearing. Gently, he pulled it down as you shrugged off the strap of the dress until you were left with nothing but your undergarments.
“You’re so beautiful,” Jay admired, kissing your nape then towards your shoulder as his hands trailed on your arms before wrapping it around waist. His hands pressed on your stomach, caressing every skin his hands could reach. You could only throw your head back to his touch as his lips continued to leave kisses on your neck while his hands reached your breast, cupping it gently, he playfully teased your perked nipples which made you moan softly.
“All mine, all of these — are going to be mine,” Jay possessively said before he lay you down to the bed once again. Your back hitting softly against the mattress, you watch as Jay crawls over you, eyes locked on yours as a soft smile formed on his lips.
“And I’m going to be yours, wifey, you like that right? Make me yours?” he teased and you weren’t able to say another word when he kissed you once again. Soft and steady before he separates and kisses you on your cheeks, down to your jawline — until it goes slowly down your neck and shoulder.
“I can’t believe I lost you,” he whispered against your skin. He looked at you whose eyes were red and stained with mascara, yet you still the most beautiful girl in his eyes. “I’m gonna make it up to you — even if it’ll take years or decades — just let me prove to you that you’re the only one I love.”
“Jay —” a whimper escaped on your lips as his lips travelled on your breast. His teeth grazing on your nipples before biting and sucking it making you moan louder than you should’ve. Jay hummed at the sound as his tongue swirled around it playfully before giving attention to your other breast, repeating the same action that had you whining heavenly at the pleasure.
Before you knew it, Jay's lips travelled down to your stomach, soft and careful as he looked up to you who’s holding her breath. His hands hold the panty’s waistband and you only nod as a signal, with that, he tugs it down with his gentle hands leaving you bare in front of him.
He kneeled in front of you, hands on your thighs as he stared at you lovingly, “always so beautiful for me. My prettiest girl,” he kisses your inner thighs, soft, peppered kisses as an act of devotion to you. His hold became firm as Jay spread your thighs wider, giving him a clearer view of your cunt.
The kiss was slow — too slow for your own good. You whined at his actions, wanting more than he could give, but Jay was savoring his time. The kiss was then replaced by his tongue. Giving your cunt a huge stripe before giving full attention to your throbbing clit.
“God, you always taste heavenly, so sweet for me,” Jay swore before he latched into your pussy once again. This time, his tongue did the wonders of teasing your core, lapping onto it messily as he pushed his head deeper. His mouth and chin smeared with your slick and his saliva as he became hungrier than before while you writhe against his mouth.
Jay devoured you for minutes. He didn’t stop, not even when you were crying your hearts out as the stimulation had become overwhelming to you. He wanted to see you writhing in pleasure, it turns him on to see you being pleasured by him. Jay’s grip on your thighs tightened, ignoring your heel that sinked deep on his back as his mouth continued to invade your cunt that’s been sensitive for the past few minutes.
He felt your hands on his hair, tugging a handful making him look up to you. Your breathing’s unstable, sweat beads on your body, glistening against the moon’s reflection. He could only smile at the view before he kissed your throbbing clit.
“You’re going to cum aren’t you?” he asked and you barely nodded.
“I want you inside me,” you breathed, almost a mumble. “I want to cum with you inside me.”
“You’d have that later wifey,” Jay smiled. “But let me savor my moment of proving you my love.”
Another cry of pleasure escaped your mouth as Jay lowered himself to your cunt once again. This time, he’s in a rush. A more desired plea to make you cum in no time. He laps in between your labia upwards your clit, sucking that little bud harsher before using his tongue to protrude your entrance.
It was too much for you. Your legs started to shake on his hold as Jay continued eating you out until that coil in your stomach snapped. Your back arched naturally as you writhe out of his hold. Jay didn’t stop, but instead, became more hasty, more sloppy than before, drinking all the juice his tongue could taste. Moaning loudly as he finds himself drunk in your pussy.
“So fucking good for me,” he stated as he removed himself from your cunt. He wiped off the excess using the back of his hand before he crawled over you. You let him kiss you, whining at the taste of your own juice from his lips.
Jay’s kisses became torrid, asserting dominance as he pushed his tongue to enter your mouth. Licking every inch of you as you couldn’t do anything but to let him devour you in the most animalistic manner.
“Jay — I need you, right now,” you whispered the moment the kiss broke off.
“I know love, I know,” he softly hushes you with a kiss, making you whine. “Do you want to be on top? Ride me just like before or —”
“No, I just want you close — this close Jay, please,” you begged and only a gentle kiss was all you received.
Jay pulled down his brief, revealing his hard and girthy length, already red and beading with pre-cum. He kneeled in front of you whose legs already spread, he grabbed the back of your thighs and pulled you close to him. You watched as he spat on his palm before stroking his shaft. Gulping at the sight, your heart started thumping out of nervousness.
“Just relax for me,” he gestured, free hand brushing your hair as his right hand nudged his cock on your entrance. Stroking it up and down, and circling on your clit makes you whimper.
“Good girl, look at me, alright?” Jay ordered and you looked at him. His eyes were calm, lifting your worries before the fat head of his cock started to penetrate your entrance. You could only suck your breath hard as your hold on Jay’s arms tightened.
Jay slides his cock inside with ease. You were so warm and wet for him as he buried it further, ignoring the muted whines escaping your lips. He sheathes in fully, glancing at you whose eyes were searching for his — eyes began to water as your nails dig deep on his skin.
“Comfy?” he asked.
“I’m so full,” you confessed, biting your lips as your warm walls pulled his cock tightly. “So full — Jay, please move.”
Jay complies. He started to thrust in and out of your cunt, finding a pace wherein you could feel him all the way to your cervix. It wasn’t rough that it had you curling your toes — but it was enough for you to feel him take you all over again. It felt euphoric just by the sheer thought that you had Jay this close once again.
All those years and pain started to fade away, tears started to swell as Jay captured your lips again, igniting the heat in between the two of you. It felt surreal. It hasn’t sinked into you that Jay’s within your reach again — proving his love and devotion to you in the most intimate way.
If this was a dream, you don’t want to wake up — but the moment he breaks off the kiss and looks at you, cupping your cheeks so dearly that tears trailed down your eyes that’s when it sinked into you — Jay’s here and he’s not going anywhere.
He smiled softly before wiping off the tears from your eyes, kissing your temple so gently and lightly before resting his forehead on yours, his hips started to move faster and soon the tranquil feeling was replaced with the intense pleasure on your core.
“Jay — ha! Ah!” moans started to break out of your lips. Jay was fucking you good underneath that you couldn’t help but to thrust your hips upwards, meeting his movement in the middle, creating more pleasure and friction on your cunt.
“Fuck, that’s it — fuck, you’re doing good for me, wifey,” Jay assured as his strokes become more rough, more eager to meet your pussy in between, his right hand trailed on your left hand, intertwining with your fingers, assuring you further as you continued your movement.
“So good — hhhh, Jay! Jay!” you shouted as your right hand held onto his shoulder tighter.
“I’m right here — look at me wifey, ‘right here alright,” he ordered as he pushed his cock deeper in you, pushing your hips down the mattress as he continued to rail your pussy with much intensity.
“Gonna cum — want to cum,” you mumbled in between your whimpers.
“Just cum wifey, I got you,” Jay whispered to you, kissing the shell of your ears.
Jay changes his angle, finding your g-spot that had you arching your back instinctively, that’s when he knew. He continued pounding at the spot, right hand squeezing your hand tightly, burying it down on the pillow as his free hand held on the headboard for balance. The bed squeaked due the intensity, banging against the wall as Jay thrusted deeper inside you, hungry to feel you come underneath him.
In a glimpse your orgasm came, along with a broken moan and cry as your pussy clamped around Jay’s cock, squeezing him tight as he groaned against the sensation. He didn’t stop his movement, not when he could feel your warm juices lubricating his length more, the squelching was so obscene inside the room but it only made him go animalistic.
“Gonna cum, ‘m going to,” Jay stated in between his raspy groans, eyes locked onto yours as he removed his hands from the headboard and rested it on the side of your face.
“Inside Jay please,” you ordered. Ignoring how he’s making you oversensitive all over again, you found strength to wrap your legs around his waist, locking his position on you which made him cursed under his breath.
“Don’t — I can’t —”
“Please Jay,” you begged, hands finding their way to cup his face. “Want to feel you again, please?”
He didn’t answer you but instead, placed a long, deep kiss on your lips which you responded immediately.
“I love you,” he whispered against your lips before resting his forehead on the crook of your neck, you wrapped your arms around him, coddling him dearly as he repeated the words like a mantra.
“I love you too Jay, so much, so fucking much,” you confessed as you felt his lips biting down on the skin near your collarbones.
Jay comes in no time. His groan muffled against your skin, biting down harsher earning cries from you. Hot cum spilled inside you, painting your walls white, Jay continued pumping inside you, thrust becoming slow as his energy dies down due to the high.
With the last drop of his semen spilling inside your cunt, he kisses the bite on your skin before lifting his head up to look at you.
Then a cry — that ugly cry of yours when things get too overwhelmed started. Jay was surprised at first but he instinctively lay on his back before pulling you to his side.
“It’s okay, I’m here, I’m not going to leave you,” he whispered, hands drawing circles on your back as you cried on his chest.
“You’re not going to leave?” you asked in between your sobs. “This is real right? This isn’t just nothing right Jay? You’re not going to leave me? I don’t want to be hurt again.”
“I’m sorry for hurting, I really am,” Jay apologized once again. “But I’m here now, I am not going to let you go. See? I’m here wifey, just cry it all out. If you’re still mad at me, punch me or slap me, I deserve it.”
“Sorry,” you whispered to him, nuzzling against his skin. “I’m sorry, I’m being spoiled and weak again, I just — this is real right Jay?”
“Of course, this is real wifey,” he assured, planting a kiss on top of your head. “We’re going to be okay alright? Just be with me, okay?”
You hummed, your emotions finally calming down as you felt Jay’s faint heartbeat. “Okay.”
With that one word, Jay’s body felt relieved. He continued rubbing your back before removing himself from you, startling you who looked at him who quickly gave you a comforting smile, “just trust me okay?”
He gets up from the bed, grabbing the black coat he was wearing earlier before scrambling inside its inner pocket.
“Jay…” you were speechless the moment Jay returned to bed holding a small velvet box. You were reluctant to accept it, but with Jay’s patient expression, you grabbed it from his palm, opening it and revealing to you a ring with your birthstone as its centerpiece.
You knew what it was. You looked at him with teary eyes as he smiled at you, hands grabbing the box, taking out the ring and placing it on your ring finger — to your surprise, it fitted perfectly like it was made for you.
“We’re you planning to?” you asked.
“Of course not during Sunghoon’s wedding,” he answered. “I just — I brought it, just in case, you gave me another chance.”
You looked at the ring in front of you, the sheer size of the gemstone was nothing but mesmerizing for you. You always dream of this day. To have your ring finger occupied by the most exquisite engagement ring you could ever have. You’d never thought that that day had finally arrived.
“I am doing this, not because I wanted to fulfill my promise three years ago,” Jay started, hands trailing at your delicate ones. “But I want it to be a new start for us, a stepping stone for our future. I know I can’t just say forget everything about our past, but I hope this is a second chance for us.”
“It is Jay,” you assured, nodding before your eyes started to water again. “It is — thank you, I can’t believe — I love you, I love you so much Jay. I love you enough that I forgive you about everything.”
Jay gave you an assuring kiss on the forehead. Light and gentle before he pulled you to his touch, letting you sob incoherently as his warmth gave nothing but comfort to you.
“Thank you y/n, I love you too — we’d start anew, you don’t have to worry about us anymore.”
-
Morning swept through the thin curtains in the form of salty breeze and ocean waves. It kissed your skin, gently and yet, the warmth of the man beside you was no match for the morning sun.
You opened your eyes slowly and steadily. Hair falling through your shoulders as Jay’s peaceful, sleeping face was the first thing you saw. You were resting on his arms thrown over the pillow. His other arm around your waist like he doesn’t want to let you go.
The wave crashed behind the background. Everything was serene and like a dream — but you knew, everything was real when you felt the cold band of your engagement ring on your ring finger.
Your hands crept onto Jay’s face. Tracing his face gently, afraid of waking him up as you ponder what happened last night — everything felt right suddenly for the two of you.
And it was as if he heard your worries, Jay’s free hand grabbed yours, intertwining his fingers as he placed it on his lips, a smile forming before he hummed.
“Good morning wifey,” he greeted as he opened his eyes. “I could get used to a view like this. Feels like I’m in paradise.”
You chuckled at his words, “well, we’re in paradise hubby.”
“Paradise is anywhere with you,” Jay pointed out, chuckling to his words. “Want to go out and take a dip?”
“That sounds nice — but I don’t think I have proper clothes to wear,” you reminded, remembering that both of you are naked under the sheets.
Jay only hummed, his smile becoming menacing before he grabbed you by your waist, standing up from the bed as you let out a startled yelp.
“Jay — oh my god, Jay! We’re naked!” you shouted as he had tugged the sheets along with you.
“It’s just the two of us here, don’t worry wifey,” he assured, walking towards the exit of the bedroom where the beach was in full view.
“What are you planning — Jay, I swear to God!”
But your words fell deaf when he ran quicker towards the waters — and before you could’ve processed everything, you felt your body splashing into the cold, morning sea.
Your scream echoed in the small island the moment you two rose from the waters. You were gasping for air while Jay laughed beside you, both wet and a mess from his action.
“Oh my god, I can’t believe you!” you shouted, splashing water on him who’s still laughing hysterically as his arms wrapped on your waist tighter.
“You were panicking,” he teased.
“Because you suddenly carried me into the sea! You know I don’t know how to swim Jay,” you stated and quickly, you were shut up when his lips landed on yours.
“I’m not going to let you drown of course,” he smiled.
Despite rolling your eyes on him, it wasn’t hard that you were flustered by his actions. The only thing you could do was slap him in the chest as you stare at him.
“You brought our blanket along with us,” you pointed out.
“We have a lot of blankets — and rooms, we could stay here as long as you want.” Jay explained and you became quiet.
“I don’t have any clothes Jay.”
“Already prepared a bag for you, thank your brother wifey,” he said.
That made you raise an eyebrow. “You and Heeseung planned this, didn’t you?”
“I did, I just asked permission from him,” Jay shared. “He has a pretty good kick, you know?”
You hummed, “He used to do Muay Thai, I hope you got what you deserve.”
“It’s worth it, now that I got his approval,” he shared before you a quick kiss. “And I got my second chance from you.”
You only smiled as you looked at him — a better view of his face now that you had held him this closer and longer.
Even after years have passed, he’s still the Jay that you’ve loved. He’s still here, smiling at you, looking at you lovingly as his hold on you tightened. Your right hand caressed his cheeks, he kissed it softly, just right above the ring he gave you last night, and that assured you further as your heart convinced you he’s the right one for you.
“Do you even remember the night that we had a one-night stand?” Jay asked, making you tilt your head confusingly.
“Still a blurry memory to me to be honest.” you answered. “What happened back then?”
“I was invited there by my friend, and then I saw you — dancing and heavily drunk,” he chuckled. “And I don’t know why, but I had the urge to approach you and then, you didn’t even recognize me, but you know what you told me?”
“What?”
“That I look like your first and last love,” he smiled. “And that you’re not going to love anyone anymore if it wasn’t me.”
“Well, you’ve changed drastically, I probably didn't recognize you,” you pointed out.
“And that is because you’re too drunk too.” Jay added.
“What happened then?”
“We danced, and kissed — and you wanted more, almost begging me, and maybe I just missed you so fucking much that I agreed.”
You only stared at him, memories still blurry and hazy, you wanted to remember — wanted to know more of that night.
“I’m sorry if I took advantage of you,” Jay apologized. “I’m sorry for the mess it led to.”
“I don’t care anymore,” you simply said. “Well, it did lead me back into you. It really was a second chance for us.”
“I know, and I’m glad Heeseung decided to pull a publicity stunt for us.” he grinned and just that thought made you smile.
“You enjoyed it too much Jongseong,”
“Well, I wasn’t pretending the whole time after all.”
You blinked for a second before smiling at him, “I know.”
“No more pretending?” he suggested and you only hummed.
“No more — and lying, no more.” you added.
Jay pulled you to kiss once again, you let yourself fall for him as you cupped his face and reciprocated the kiss. As he broke away from the kiss, he stared at you lovingly as he smiled. “Of course.”
