April 13, 2019 - r/choosingbeggars too? Damnit.
Q. Gifts for girlfriend’s family: I have been with my girlfriend for five months. After I got a big raise at work, I decided to splurge and upgrade my TV and computer. I knew my girlfriend was raised by a single mom, “DeeDee,” and that money was tight with the two younger brothers. I offered them my 4-year-old computer and TV. At first, my girlfriend’s mom was overjoyed. We drove down and set everything up for the kids. A week later, DeeDee texted me that her boys had destroyed both the TV and the computer and that it was my job to replace them. I told her no. She left a profanity-filled voice message. When I went to talk to my girlfriend, she came down on her mom’s side. It was an “accident,” and it wasn’t like I couldn’t afford to replace them. We fought. My girlfriend started to cry and I apologized to make her stop, but I am still pissed. I am questioning my relationship with her now. I do love her, but this entire situation has put things in a different light. We are each other’s first serious relationship. What do I need to do?
Oh yeah, this sounds like a family I want to marry into! Sign me up!
Your girlfriend’s mom is what the internet calls, “An entitled bitch choosing beggar.” Not only does she seem to think she’s entitled to stuff, but that you have to buy it for her.
First of all, you gave them a gift, a nice gift, and they fucked it up. Too bad so sad, let me play the tiniest violin in the galaxy for it.
Second, not only did they demand what they are not entitled to, but the mom lashed out at you.
Third, your girlfriend is dumb. No, really, she is dumb. Coming down on her mom’s side is the action of a stupid person who doesn’t know where the line is. It would be one thing if she gave her mom lip service and then told you that she doesn’t actually think you’re in the wrong here, but she actually thinks you’re wrong!
Why? Just because you can buy them a new one, doesn’t mean you should, or have to. You were already generous, and I’m guessing DeeDee is a single mom because she’s a nasty bitch who can’t pick a decent sperm donor. If her daughter isn’t discerning this as a problem, she’s probably internalizing it as a good way to act to get what you want.
Which means, you need to run like hell. As they say, you can’t fix stupid, so it’s best to just leave it, I mean, do you really want to be the beleaguered spouse of a “Karen” who is always asking “to speak to the manager.”
Naww. Consider that tv a parting gift and tell her she can seek you out when she understands what her mom did wrong and if she doesn’t, you wish her best of luck because she needs it.
